Not Safe For Work: A Steamy Fake Dating Romance

Chapter 4

“Hey,what are you still doing here?” Gabby asks on her way out of the office.

I should probably lie, but I just don’t have it in me.

“Please don’t read into it, but I’m waiting for Liv to get back. She looked kind of upset this afternoon and it’s after six, but all her stuff is still here. I just want to make sure she’s okay.”

“Oh, brother. You are never getting over this girl.” I roll my eyes but don’t respond because it’s not worth another argument. I’ve tried staying away from Liv ever since I found out Ian was in the picture, but it’s getting harder to push her away. Even if all I get to do is help her earn the promotion she’s fighting for, being the one to make her smile is worth it.

“I’ll see you at home, okay? I’m sure she’ll be back soon.”

“I’m staying at Kadesha’s tonight,” she replies, heading to the door. Then she turns around and yells, “Have fun pining!”

A half hour goes by and I’m really starting to worry about Liv. The entire office is empty, and I’ve checked every single conference room for her. Who leaves work without their phone?

I finally decide I’m being an idiot, and maybe a creep, and pack up my stuff. Ian probably surprised her and took her out for a date or something.

It’s too late to go to the gym now, so I decide to take the stairs. But when I open the door to the stairwell, I find Liv. She’s crouched down on the floor curled into herself the same way Churro does when he’s scared. I can’t tell if she’s crying but she’s definitely shaking.

“Liv? What’s wrong?” She’s breathing erratically like she can’t get any air. “Can you breathe? Do you need me to call an ambulance?”

She subtly shakes her head and lifts her face to meet my gaze. Her tear-free eyes shine back at me, but I can’t understand the expression. All I see is fear.

“Please, talk to me. What happened?” I beg, dropping to my knees in front of her. My voice is desperate but I need to know what’s going on because I have no idea how to help her. All I can do is watch as her chest heaves up and down, the movement completely unnatural.

I reach out a hand to cup her shoulder, wanting to comfort her in any way I can. Her wide eyes track the movement. Suddenly her hand finds mine, tugging and pressing it right over her sternum. She pushes against me, adding more force to the compression until I can feel the shift in her breathing pattern.

Eventually, her head tips back and she blows out a very long and shaky breath. The hand that isn’t covering mine is wrapped in a tight fist. I grab onto it and urge her to relax her grip before she digs her nails in any further.

“Liv?” I ask, because I don’t know what else to say. It’s clear she can breathe now, but I also know she’s not fine. And I really can’t ignore the fact that both of our hands are still touching. I release the one on the floor between us, but she keeps my other firmly pressed between hers and her chest.

“Just a panic attack. I’m okay. Sorry.”

She finally lets go and I slump down next to her, releasing a big breath of my own. Not that a panic attack isn’t serious, but I’m just relieved she finally spoke. I wrap an arm around her almost subconsciously, but she doesn’t move away. Comfort is clearly what she needs.

“Want me to call Ian for you?” I spit the words out as quickly as I can because Ian is the last person I want to see today.

“What?” She turns toward me. “No, definitely, definitely not.” Not sure what’s going on there but I’m definitely not going to ask.

“Okay, what do you need? How can I help?”

“I think—” She braces her hands on the ground to move to standing but her whole body is still shaking. I bracket my hands on either side of her and help her up, letting her lean on me for support. “Thanks.” She flashes a shy smile. “I just want to go home.”

“Okay, I’ll walk you. Let’s go grab your stuff.”

She clings to me as we walk back into the office, and I hate myself for how much I enjoy it. This girl is clearly going through something and I’m busy inhaling the scent of her shampoo like some sort of addict.

“You really don’t need to walk me. I’m all the way over Russian Hill, by Ghirardelli. Isn’t your bike here anyway?”

“And it’ll be fine if it stays here. Are you hungry? Thirsty? You look a little pale.”

She looks down at her stomach like she’s checking to see if it’s empty. “Yeah, a little.”

“Okay, last question. How do you feel about ridiculously cute, tiny animals?”

She looks at me this time. At first all I see is confusion, like she’s trying to figure out what I’m hiding behind my eyes. But then she smiles, really smiles. She has the prettiest smile I’ve ever seen. “I think I feel pretty good about them…”

“Alright, Sparkles. Come with me.”

I decideto take Liv back to my place since Gabby’s staying at her girlfriend’s. It’s only a few blocks from the office and one of her favorite take-out restaurants is across the street. I’ve seen her get their ramen for lunch about a hundred times, and a big bowl of noodles sounds like just what she needs right now. And personally, I believe Churro can cure any ailment.

She doesn’t fight me on the plan, even though we’ve never socialized outside of the office before, minus a few company events. She also perks up quite a bit when I mention ramen for dinner.

Liv is definitely still shaken up and I can see she’s having some internal conversation with herself. It’s always easy to tell when she’s thinking hard about something because she mouths the words in her head. I’m also tracking the finger tap thing she tends to do when her anxiety comes out, poking the pad of her thumb with each nail over and over.

I shouldn’t know these things because I shouldn’t pay this much attention to her. She’s not mine. She never has been.

But as well as I’ve hidden it from her, I’ve never been able to stop myself from noticing.

I take her inside my apartment before I order the food so she can relax while I pick it up. And then I introduce her to Churro.

“A hedgehog? The way you talk about him I was sure he was a dog.” Yeah, she’s not the first person to say that.

“Gabby begged me to get us a dog when we moved here, but with my hours it was impossible. We considered a cat but then we found out she’s allergic, so after lots of consideration, we landed on…Churro.”

“He really is adorable,” she coos while I pick him up. “How’d you come up with his name?”

“Well, I have a weakness for desserts and my mom made churros a lot when we were little. They were always Gabby’s favorite. And I have to practice rolling my r’s every day or quickly lose the ability. It was a win-win,” I answer.

“Oh yeah. You’re both always speaking Spanish together at the office. I assumed you were just being secretive, but is there another reason?”

“Secretive? No, we’re just used to speaking both languages. We were born in Argentina, and our mom always spoke to us in Spanish when we were little.”

I’m really not trying to air my family history, so before she can respond, I walk her through a basic tutorial of how to handle a hedgehog. She seems eager to cuddle with him, which isn’t always the case. Most people assume he can’t be held without hurting them. Gabby always tells me that my love language is physical touch, and now I’m wondering if it’s possible that Liv’s is the same.

I grab the sling Kadesha made and let Liv use it. Once she’s settled with Churro in her lap and smiling again, I run out to grab the food.

Dinner goes by easily with a bit of small talk, but as we finish and I sense her getting ready to jet, I can’t stop myself from asking, “Will you tell me what happened?”

She looks back at me like I’m holding a loaded gun, like if she stares into my eyes long enough, she’ll be able to know if she can trust me not to shoot.

“You can trust me,” I say.

Her gaze turns thoughtful. Then she hands me her phone. “Read it.”

I quickly parse through the email to see it’s from the CMO at Surf and Stream. And then I— “He asked you out? What a creep.”

Her arms fly up over her head. “Thank you! That’s what I thought.”

“I don’t get it. Did he do something to you? Why are you so upset over this?” I don’t mean to diminish her feelings, and if this guy fucking touched her, I’ll kill him. I just don’t think Liv is the kind of girl to freak out over a request for a date. A polite request at that.

“Mitch doesn’t want me to say no. In fact, he sort of insinuated that if I reject him, and we lose this deal, I’ll never get promoted.”

“Are you fucking with me?” That is complete bullshit. And also… “Wait. Are you sure he wasn’t joking? Ian would flip if he found out. There’s no way he’d go along with you dating someone else just to help our bottom line.”

Liv’s gaze drops down to the sofa and she starts to chew on the inside of her cheek. She still has Churro in her lap but he’s fast asleep. “Ian wouldn’t care. We’re not together anymore. He…he dumped me.”

I clench every muscle I have trying to school my features. He dumped her?

“I haven’t really told anyone,” she continues. “Only Andie knows. Well, and HR. So Mitch found out right away.”

“How long?” I ask, trying and failing to keep any emotion out of my voice.

“Huh?”

“How long have you been broken up for?”

“Oh. A few months now.”

What the hell? Mitch knew about this for months and didn’t tell me? He’s the only one besides Gabby who knows how I felt about Liv. So much for thinking we were friends.

“I’m really sorry,” I say, only because I’m sure she’s expecting me to say something and not jump up and down on the couch screaming “fuck yes!”

“I’m not. I can’t believe I was with him for so long. He wasn’t—sorry, never mind.”

I would kill to know what she was about to say, but before I can find my words her phone chimes. She flinches when she reads the text.

“What’s wrong?” I ask.

“Nothing. Just Mitch again.”

I check my watch and see it’s almost nine o’clock. “Does he normally text you at night?”

“All the time. It’s so annoying,” she whines.

“Really? Like about work or…”

“Rarely. He usually just wants to know if I’m caught up on the latest episode of Dragon Wars or he’ll ask for advice on what to do with his ex-wife. I really, really wish I didn’t know so much about his love life.” She makes a “blech” noise.

“That’s inappropriate. He shouldn’t be texting you after hours like this. You should tell him to stop.”

She looks up at me and starts to chuckle. At first I smile back but then her laugh turns maniacal and I realize I’ve chosen my words poorly. “Oh, I should? Does he text you after hours?”

“Well, yeah, but?—”

“But you’re a guy?”

“I mean…I didn’t mean it like…” Shit. I have no idea what to say.

“Scottie, it’s okay. I know you mean well. But if I tell Mitch it’s inappropriate, I’ll be drawing a line in the sand. I’m already on the outside of your little club. I don’t get invited to golf on the weekends, or the strip club team lunches. Or the happy hours.” She gives me a pointed look at this, and I feel like such a piece of shit. “So yeah, I put up with a few inappropriate texts and let him bitch to me about how it wasn’t his fault he cheated. If it helps me finally get the promotion, then it’s worth it.”

“I’m sorry. I never really thought about all that.” And this time I really am sorry, because I never thought about any of it. She’s right. Mitch takes our team golfing all the time. I guess it never occurred to me whether she was even invited or didn’t want to come. Does she play?

And I’ve unknowingly contributed to this too. Does she think I don’t invite her because she’s a woman? I want, no I need, to explain myself. I just don’t know how to without giving myself away.

“Ugh.” My thoughts are interrupted as she grunts at another incoming text.

“Can I see?” I ask. She hands me the phone and I’m more than disgusted by what’s on the screen.

Mitch:

Did you respond to Tristan yet?

I need to know the plan Livy

If you really want to be in sales you’re gonna have to learn to use the assets you’ve got. Let’s stop pretending the hair and the heels wasn’t part of your strategy today

Don’t be such a tease

When I look up at Liv, tears swell in her eyes and her fists are wrapped around her long red hair, tucking it into a bun. She’s muttering to herself, but I can’t make out the words.

“What’d you say?” I ask.

She scoffs. “Just that Ian was right.” Jesus. I don’t even want to know.

“Is there anything in the middle?” she asks suddenly. I’m not sure what she’s referring to, so I give her a questioning look. “Like, is there anything in between a slut and a tease? Because I’d really like to know. It seems like no matter what I do, I’m one of the two, so I’m just asking, is there another option?”

My lips part to respond, but nothing comes out. I have no idea what to say to her. She shouldn’t have to deal with this shit, especially not from her manager.

With all of my frustration directed at Mitch, I don’t think for a second before tapping on his name and hitting the call button. Liv is staring at me horrified when he answers the phone.

“Hey Livy.”

“It’s Gavin, actually.”

“Oh, umm, hey? This is Olivia’s phone, right?” I love how flustered he sounds. I want him to be nervous about this call. Even if I have no idea what I’m going to say.

“Yeah, she’s at my place.” Liv is watching me with wide eyes and an open mouth. She looks terrified and I hate that I’m contributing to that. But I also can’t get the image of her out of my head, the one from two hours ago when she was on the floor struggling to breathe. “Stop asking her to date a prospect. You’re not her fucking pimp. She isn’t okay with it, and she shouldn’t have to tell you twice.”

“Christ, Scottie, can you just let us handle this? You’re really making a big deal out of nothing.”

“Are you not telling her to date this guy to close a deal?”

“What I’m doing is none of your damn business. Put Olivia on the phone.”

I’m fuming. The texts he sent her, the way he’s dismissing her feelings now; she had a panic attack worrying about her job over this and he doesn’t seem to give a shit.

It’s like Davide all over again. I shouldn’t even be talking to Mitch. The CEO is my closest friend. And I’m sure Daanesh would want Mitch gone if he knew this was happening. But can we really afford to lose our VP of sales with this acquisition on the line? Would the board even allow it, or just blame Liv like they did with Megan in recruiting? Mitch isn’t the kind of guy that would go quietly.

I look back at Liv, trying to convey an apology with my eyes. Because I wish I could do the right thing here. I wish I could tell Mitch to go fuck himself and have his desk cleaned out tomorrow. I wish I could make our office a safer place for people like Liv. I wish I wasn’t a selfish bastard who chose paying off his loans over keeping our company douche-bag free.

So I’ll have to do the next best thing. I can’t stop myself from what I’m about to say. It’s the only option I can think of.

“Actually, it is my business. Liv and I are together.”