Chapter Twenty One
B ea caught sight of Alli’s face, saw her green eyes flash and her mouth almost smile. Then she saw her wipe her face clear, put her sandwich down, and stalk out of the dining room.
No time like the present, Bea thought, taking a deep breath before she followed Alli out of the room.
Alli was striding along the corridor and Bea had to run a little to catch up with her. So her breath was coming a little faster and then she slid as she was approaching her and reached up and then… Then she was pushing Alli against a door and the door was opening and they were both tumbling inside.
Laying on top of Alli, there was clearly only one thing to do. Bea couldn’t help herself. She gave in to everything she wanted and tangled her fingers in Alli’s hair, pulling her closer until their lips were crushing together, until she felt Alli’s body relax into hers, until that breath-taking, heart-beating rush was upon her again.
Then Alli pulled back and cool green eyes were looking into Bea’s.
“I promised myself this wasn’t going to happen again,” Alli said, breath warm on Bea’s face.
“To be fair, last time you kissed me, this time it’s me kissing you,” said Bea, staring down into Alli’s face in wonder.
“I’m not sure that was my point in not doing this again.”
“Hmm.” Bea gave this a second of thought. “Are you saying that you didn’t want to?”
“It seems inappropriate.”
“We are both adults.”
“Again, maybe not exactly what I was going for.”
Bea shifted minutely. “You’re very confusing, do you know that?”
“And you’re not?” Alli countered. “I mean, I blackmailed you, do you remember that part?”
“You also ran into my beautiful car, shouted at me, and refused to participate in my classes,” Bea said. “And I snapped at you and tried very hard to hate you. So why did you kiss me upstairs?”
Alli shrugged, biting her lip and looking anywhere but into Bea’s eyes.
“Was it because you wanted to?” Bea asked. “Was it because just in that moment it seemed like the only thing that you could do?”
“What would you know about it?” asked Alli.
Bea took a breath. “My best friend Liz says that opposites can attract. And there’s something about you. Something that makes me want to stand up for myself, that makes me somehow stronger and more confident and I don’t know what it is, but it makes me want more of you.”
Alli squinted. “What would you know about that?”
“I just kissed you, remember?”
Alli shifted and Bea sat up. “We have nothing in common.”
“We don’t know each other,” said Bea, now sitting astride Alli’s thighs. “Which is something that could be easily corrected.”
For once, Alli had nothing to say. She just stared up at Bea from the ground in a way that made Bea want to do unspeakable things to her.
“Listen, if you’re not interested, just speak up and I’ll leave you alone,” Bea said, wondering once again where this confidence was coming from.
“No,” Alli said quite quickly. “No, that’s not what I said.”
“What’s the problem, then?”
Alli lifted her hands as though to gesture at everything around her. “All of this.”
Bea considered this. It was a fair point. She didn’t want to lose her job, though she was starting to suspect that there was something else going on around here. On the other hand, she couldn’t remember having felt like this before and that seemed like a gift from the universe, something she couldn’t let go.
“We could be discreet,” she offered. “If you want to.”
Alli firmed her jaw. “You’re annoying. You’re weak and annoying, and I don’t want to be here.”
“You’re irritating, bossy and verging on criminal,” Bea pointed out.
“Fair,” said Alli.
Bea allowed one hand to trail along Alli’s side, to trace the curve of her waist. She wanted this. No, she needed this. She deserved this. For once, she was going to take what she wanted and be damned with everything else.
It had been so long. She’d been with Robbie as long as she could remember. She’d missed these feelings. And… and there was a growing certainty inside her that she had given enough. That if the universe was offering Alli up on a plate, she’d be stupid to turn her down.
“What’s the problem, then?” Bea said more gently.
Alli turned her head. “I just…” She took an uncharacteristically shaky breath. “I just… I thought I couldn’t do this.”
“Okay, that’s what we’re discussing.”
“No, no, I mean in general.” Alli breathed again. “I thought I didn’t feel these things, okay? That I was broken, that I wasn’t meant to feel things like this and then… And then all of a sudden you’re standing there in that corridor and… And it’s like I was exploding inside.”
Bea reached out, stroked her cheek. “You’re not broken. ”
“Yes, I can see that now,” Alli said, breath starting to come faster.
“And I’d never have dared,” said Bea quietly. “I’d never have dared touch someone as beautiful as you. Except you did it first and it’s like you gave me permission.”
“You don’t need permission,” growled Alli. “Take what you damn well want.”
And that might just have been general life advice, but for Bea it was far more immediate than that. She leaned down again, pressing Alli against the floor, pressing her lips against Alli’s, feeling her tongue slide into Alli’s mouth and her body start to respond to Alli’s.
And this time, Alli was giving it all back and more, was clutching at her, wrapping her arms around her and turning her until Bea was the one on the floor and Alli’s thigh was between her legs and Bea was pushing up against it and groaning into Alli’s mouth and…
And this time Bea was the one pulling back. “Jesus.”
“I didn’t tell you to stop,” Alli breathed.
“You don’t tell me anything,” Bea said pertly. “We’re in the middle of an unlocked room right before classes are supposed to start. Hardly the time or the place.”
Alli licked at her lips. “Fine,” she said, sitting up, then standing and offering Bea a hand.
Bea let herself be pulled up. “We’re not done here, though.”
“Are we not?” Alli arched an eyebrow.
“We have things to talk about,” said Bea. “And things to… to do.”
“Uh-huh.” Alli’s mouth curved at the corners and for a moment Bea needed to kiss her again.
“But I wanted you to know that I was interested.”
“Message received and understood,” Alli said. She looked around the room. “This isn’t like real life, anyway.”
Bea shook her head. “I suppose not,” she said. It was a fair point, a good one. It seemed like whatever happened here wouldn’t impact the outside world. Like this was a safe space to try things.
Alli reached out tentatively, took Bea’s hand, wrapped her long, strong fingers around it and squeezed.
Bea smiled. “Later,” she said, the word full of promise.
“Later,” said Alli, smiling back.
And then the door opened and Alli was dropping Bea’s hand like it was a hot coal.
“Everyone’s looking for you,” chirped Izzy.
“We were just… going over some yoga moves,” Bea said weakly.
“Oh, well, we’re all in the classroom across the hall,” Izzy said. “Well, all except Charles, of course. He’s been taken away somewhere.”
“Like where?” Alli asked.
Izzy shrugged. “Dunno. We haven’t seen him since he started demanding to speak to Luke and asking for answers.”
“What?” Bea asked.
Izzy filled her in on what had happened.
“But why would he react like that?” Alli said when she’d heard the story for a second time. “Charles is the most un-angry person I’ve ever met, and I should know.”
“Dunno,” Izzy said again. “But he was definitely angry. His lawyer must have told him something. Maybe something about his kids? I can’t imagine why else he’d be so het up.”
“Or maybe anger takes different people in different ways,” Bea said. “Just because you’ve never seen Charles angry doesn’t mean that he doesn’t get angry. He is in an anger management program, after all.”
Izzy shuffled her feet and looked at the floor.
“Iz,” Alli said sternly.
“What?”
“Something you want to say there?”
She looked for an instant like she might be about to say something, but then she shook her head. Even when Alli glared at her, she still said nothing.
“Izzy,” Bea said. “If there’s something you know, then you should spit it out if it could be helpful.”
“I don’t know anything,” Izzy said. “But I don’t think Charles deserves to be here. Not like you,” she added to Alli.
“Thanks so much,” said Alli.
“She has a point,” said Bea. “You know, you could just buckle down and complete the program, maybe work on some of those issues and improve yourself. You’re here anyway, you might as well take advantage of it.”
“I’m not staying,” Alli said firmly.
Bea almost crumbled, almost said something pathetic. But then Alli looked at her and instead she did just what Alli would have done. She lifted one eyebrow. “Are you not?” she said, the implications very clear in her voice.
Alli flushed and didn’t answer.
Izzy cleared her throat. “Um, we are all sort of waiting for you. All except Charles, obviously.”
Bea nodded at her. “We’ll be right there. Please tell the rest of the class to get into child’s pose and start their breathing exercises.”
Izzy scuttled off.
“We’re not finished with this,” Bea said. “Don’t think that you’re going to escape this easily.”
“I can still tell your boss that you lost your temper with me,” said Alli.
“And I could tell him that you harassed me,” said Bea with a grin. “So I’d say we’re pretty even on that score.”
Alli regarded her for a moment and then grinned. “I’m starting to like you more.”
“Good,” said Bea. “Because I’ve got a feeling we’re going to be seeing a lot more of each other.”