Of Blood and Smoke

Chapter 46

FORTY-SIX

Josiah

It was a sobering moment, the minute I knelt in Kiam’s ritual chamber. We were preparing to perform the magic that would summon the wraiths so I could force them to do my bidding. The specter of everything that could’ve been loomed before me and now I was ready to claim my birthright.

No longer was I beholden to the Collective of Ancients or trapped under their psychological spell. I had broken free first by the mere awareness of it, and now by moving forward.

Hard to fight an invisible enemy.

Just as Della had broken free of her circumstances with help from others, I was undergoing the same.

I now understood her reluctance to accept what I’d offered a little bit better than I had. It wasn’t a comfortable feeling, allowing others in, not when one was used to being their own source of strength. The trust it required was encompassing and I sincerely hoped I didn’t come to regret relying on Kiam.

Micha stood in a corner of the room formed of natural river rock watching while Kiam led me through marking thirteen Second Realm specific runes inside the circle he’d directed me to draw with chalk. The chamber was deep underground, below the castle-like fortress, with the sound of dripping water in the distance.

Every step of the elaborate instructions had to be performed by my hand, guided by the print-out spell. This all took an immense level of effort on my part, to let down my guard and allow all the sensations to bombard me, rendering me vulnerable to any machinations Kiam may have harbored against me.

“Rein it in, Josiah,” he warned me, more than once. “Refocus.”

Micha sent me a sympathetic glance as I retracted my blossoming aura of anger with a hiss. “You need to find a balance,” Kiam advised.

He was repeating what I’d been told earlier upstairs. Logically, I’d known this somewhere deep inside. Without even noticing, I’d moderate my errant emotional impulses in the Third Realm when I didn’t completely lock them out.

This was different than shutting out the chaotic vibrations, frequencies, sights, sounds, and scents. This ran deeper and it’d been blocked by Ezra’s curse.

Simply, I needed to take more notes of the times my innate magical blood rose and seize it, and then I’d have the balance spoken of and be the precision weapon I always should’ve been. The enchantment placed on me restricted me from acting, for the most part, in any way not to the advantage of the Court, to Ezra.

When I’d used magic, it’d had one aim. There’d been exceptions, as there was to any rule, due to the slow erosion of time. I’d been stymied, and Micha nearly the same. He’d been able to fight off Ezra better than I.

For the sake of control, I’d always dampened my demonic roots and ignored the buffet of tactile sensations and sounds. The allure of a myriad of emotions fluttering about in the atmosphere had always called to me but I’d forsaken those feelings for the steadfast duty of a cold and austere persona.

Della had somehow begun breaking down those walls, without any magic of her own. Even so, my Modis operandi was by default stark and stern for everyone but those closest to me, effectively shutting everything out.

My confidence increased, knowing I would effect change. For a quarter of a second, I detected what may have been pride crossing my teacher’s face. Kiam’s expression returned to stone before I could be certain.

“Commence,” Kiam ordered.

Switching my gaze from the wall to the ground in front of me, I knelt and placed the sheet of paper before me, placing my palms on the cold river rock. The candles in the walls flickered, and a breeze stirred through the ceremonial space. My gaze darted about, automatically scanning for danger. There was none, and I returned to the cream-colored instructions.

As the words left my mouth, I channeled everything I could into each sentence, letting the weight of the spell slide from my tongue with authority and passion. I allowed myself to feel everything, engaging the emotions I’d always shut off when tapping into magic.

Anger, vengeance, and hatred were there but now I allowed the love I had for Della to flow. Then the hidden, softer side of my being welled within me to compliment the darker urges. I wasn’t lying to myself as I had when I first visited Della, telling myself it was for the security of the Court, nor was I focused on any threats to my company that could shed a negative light on the Collective. This was all for me.

It was as though something was breaking inside, as if a thousand tiny pieces of shattering glass ran through my veins. I groaned, the odd sensation lightly cutting me from the inside out. Painful, but also a relief, like pulling a splinter from the palm of my hand.

Bowed over from the sensation, I straightened my spine. I was ready to summon and instruct the wraiths.

The candlelight snuffed out suddenly, before re-sparking, and a wind picked up, roaring through the chamber. Shadows began to form, and the scent of death and decay filled the room.