CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
MANON
My mouth stayed glued shut, as I couldn’t trust my mouth to form words that wouldn't spiral into a ramble.
So instead of giving Cassie the clarification and validation she desired, I stood almost paralyzed with shame as I watched her scoff in my face before snatching my son up and leaving.
I wanted to chase Cassie. Run after her and tell her everything that has been sitting on the tip of my tongue for weeks. I wanted her to know that the situation wasn’t what it seemed, no matter how bad it looked to anyone, even me . The only money I cared about was hers, and how much they wanted to charge her. But in the moment, none of that seemed like something she would’ve wanted to hear.
Even I knew how fake that sounded. A lawyer, not sharing information to their client because they wanted to save them money…
Yeah, I kept my mouth sealed shut, because none of what I had to say made sense. All my reasoning seamed irrational. Cassie was right to leave. I wasn't being the lawyer she needed or the partner she desired.
I don’t know how long I stood there before finally kicking off my shoes, but my feet were stiff and sore by the time they hit the cold hard floors. I could feel the arches stretching out as I walked around the couch before dropping down.
More like bellyflopping, until I was face down into the cushions. I almost wanted to suffocate myself, not really, but just enough until my brain went fuzzy enough to forget all about today.
I was shocked when I didn't feel my cushions immediately soak up my pathetic tears, but it was because my face was dry. Not because I wasn't heartbroken or completely and utterly destroyed emotionally, but my body felt numb. Like I was in shock.
I think I might have just broke .
Before walking through that door, I was already walking on the edge of plummeting, because just twenty minutes prior I was officially relieved from my position at Perian Law. This was just the cherry on top of my shit show of a Wednesday.
My glass bubble was officially broken, when Dylan came in I had no more than three seconds to prepare for how pissed he was going to be. The idea of one of the lawyers underneath his fine-tuned and well-constructed firm going behind his back to work on one of the biggest cases to date was earth-shattering for him as well. But what surprised me the most was that he didn’t even care about the fact that I had gone behind his back. He was just pissed that it was a “nameless weak-minded woman” doing the job.
For almost forty-five minutes, Dylan proceeded to degrade me in every way humanly possible. I didn't know why I was so shocked and distraught to find out that my childhood dream firm was no better than the businesses I was going to court to fight against. But I felt sick, the way his eyes burned through me like I was nothing, I could have been a piece of trash for all he cared. That’s what he called newbie lawyers like me; he said and I quote:
“Women like you only get hired at law firms for two reasons; to be a future mistress, or so that female clients can feel comfortable working with us.”
My heart dropped. It was like my entire identity was being shredded into pieces.
“You’re bait, Kapoor.”
I sat there silently as he called me almost every name in the book. The few women who worked there made the firm more money, all while not having to pay us even half the billable rate. The clarity that sentence brought me changed my entire view of the industry.
I really was nothing compared to them. It didn’t matter how hard I worked; it was always going to be less than. I knew that from the beginning though, when I learned how harsh the world was on women in male-dominated spaces. The nasty comments I used to get from teachers or even friends diminished my dreams because I would be too emotional or weak. Dylan had repeated the same ones to me almost twenty years later.
“What a joke,” I muttered out loud for the first time in however long. When I raised my head from the cushions the sky was turning a dark grey and almost all the blue had faded away.
Damn, how long had I blacked out for?
My bones felt weak, I was still wearing my heather grey suit from earlier, seeing as I flopped down with not even an inch of energy to change. When I moved to stand, the fabric was scrunched up and creased around my legs and hips, telling me that I had been lying there for hours.
It felt like I had just laid down and taken the longest nap in history, but with my eyes wide open the entire time. I could feel how bloodshot they were without having to even look in the mirror. I just stood there for a second, letting my body reacclimate to the cold and empty energy of my home.
I never realized how dead, and lonely my place was until the second Cassie and Leo left. My heart ached when I saw how he meowed in her arms. He didn’t look or sound like he wanted to leave, but neither did she.
Cassie was pissed, which was obvious, but she looked more haunted by disappointment and pain. She never wanted this; it was all my own wrong doings. I ruined something good for the both of us, all because I couldn’t communicate.
The idea of her having to find out from my laptop felt so stupid. Not because I couldn’t have gotten away with it, but because I could have just been the one to tell her, weeks ago.
I squeezed my eyes tight as I felt someone twist the dagger that was already stabbed into my heart.
Before I could think, I was walking back around the couch and into the kitchen where Cassie was seated when I walked in. The sudden urge to see exactly what she saw overtook me. I didn’t care that I read it weeks ago. It was like I needed to punish myself further.
And there it was, as soon as my pointer finger tapped on the mousepad the laptop came to life, glowing with the name Nick Leed at the top of the screen.
I felt nauseous thinking about how similar he and Dylan seemed and how long I was blind to it. Never felt so stupid before. Aside from everything with Cassie, I actually thought I had my shit together. That I had climbed the corporate ladder and did everything that I was supposed to do. But here I was, suddenly feeling like all that time I spent preparing for this lifestyle had just all gone to waste.
My eyes read the email over like it was the first time again. I felt my body go cold as my lips when tight. But when I felt my eyes snagged on one sentence, I leaned back.
“So, we trust that you and your team will make the right decision based on financial responsibilities, and the evidence gathered.”
Dylan had mentioned earlier in the middle of his rampage that they had emailed him separately just this morning. Saying that since we never responded they were more than prepared to win come May 3rd.
But what could Blue Wheels even have on Cassie that would make them that confident in themselves for a second time?
At first, I thought it was just their egos talking. I was starting to think they could have caught something that I might have missed.
Fear knotted inside of me, what could I have missed? I thought I reviewed all the documents available. But something was telling me I needed to do a double-check. I had been so drowned in my feelings this past couple of weeks; I could have very well skipped past something critical.
I shot forward, immediately starting to close out of my email before heading to check the files.
Fuck, the files that contain the documents of Cassie’s case were on my work laptop. Which was still at Perian sitting at my now old desk.
My eyes skated around the room trying to think quickly. When I saw the clock said 5:36 pm I got a shiver of hope. I guess I must still have some luck because even though it was a gloomy day out and looked later than it was, Grace was probably still in office.
I’m sure she hasn’t even heard about me being let go yet because I slipped out unseen, without another word. She must think I just left early. I could feel my fingertips start to tingle.
They only ever did that when I felt like I was onto something. Whether it was something big or small, I always found myself rubbing my fingertips together when I started to feel something energetically.
And right now, I was going haywire. I had drafted up and then sent an email to Grace asking her to fax over all of the documents that were available from both sides of the case. I needed to know all of what Blue Wheels filed to the court. Then, just in case Grace wasn’t available, I sent a backup one to Neil.
My brain raked through what it could be as I paced to help the time go by. But nothing clicked. I had refreshed my email three times in the past two minutes, just hoping either of their names would magically pop up.
But after ten minutes when I saw Grace's name pop up at the top of my screen I wanted to cry.
Subject: Blue Wheels Documents
Saw you left early, hope everything’s okay!
Faxing the documents over to you right now!
Best regards, Grace Anderson
Administrative Assistant Perian Law Group
As soon as I read the last sentence, I heard my fax machine turn on. The faint beeps before the sound of hot paper being printed out one by one made me jump from my seat. The file I asked her to fax contained over 200 documents, starting from the car wreck all the way to the Reddit screenshots.
For a moment I silently thanked Grace, but immediately a pang of guilt hit me when I realized the position she would be left in. She was in deep just like me, if not worse if that's how Dylan really felt.
Which sucks to think about, because I know she’s going to be an amazing lawyer one day. I just hope he doesn’t suck her dry and then spit her out like he just did to me. I can't help but feel like I’m partly to blame as well though, I hired her. I was the one who willingly and excitedly brought another woman into the firm to be dragged through the dirt.
No, I had no idea—but maybe I could’ve. What if I wasn’t so buried in my work that I missed everything happening around me? Just like this—how out of touch was I?
I thought I knew everything, but this was all happening right underneath my nose. I was just walking around like a puppet in Dylan’s play.
When it finished printing, I immediately started clearing the center of my living room free of any furniture. Not before getting briefly triggered by the remembrance of Cassie and I’s sleepover.
I cringed, lips tight as I began laying out each group of documents based on their connection to the case.
By the time I finished, my whole floor was covered, but as tired as my brain was, I knew this was only the start. If Cassie wasn’t going to talk to me, that was fine. I deserved it. But that didn’t give me the excuse to fall into a slump and bomb her case. If anything, it was the one thing I owed to her. I didn’t let her decide on her own and now I needed to put my money where my mouth was.
From the beginning, I thought, what if I really could win this case? I pushed (and crossed) all ethical and personal boundaries that I’ve ever known, but I always had one goal in mind. Even if Cassie didn’t believe or trust me, she was still counting on me.
Perian Law might’ve taken my platform away but they could never take away my degree.
So, I did what I knew best, I worked.
I worked until my thumbs ran pink and the corners of the stark white paper turned red from how many paper cuts I had. The bags under my eyes weighed my face down, until I was laying on the floor from exhaustion. But there was nothing in my brain that told me to stop. I was well past my limit, yet I was working like I had just clocked in.
I never needed Dylan, or Perian Law to work like this, this was all me.
I was only halfway through when I found it.
My eyes were wide, and my attention was still sharp, even if I had shadows of purples under them I was still well aware. That’s why the document stood out to me. It was the one and only clear evidence Blue Wheels had to hold against Cassie.
Blue Wheels, Inc. Internal Incident Report: Driver Distraction Detection Evidence Date of Incident: December 12, 2023 Driver Name: Cassandra Deacon Vehicle Rented: Black Suburban SUV, License Plate #XYZ123 Rental Period: October 2, 2023 – December 12, 2023
HANDS-FREE DETECTION DEVICE:
The Blue Wheels’ hands-free sensor system, integrated into all our rental vehicles, is designed to ensure the safety and security of both our renters and the public. This system includes the following key features:
Motion Tracking : Tracks the drivers abrupt changes in speed. Bluetooth and device connectivity : Detects active pairing of any Bluetooth device when in motion. Speed tracker : Monitors patterns of inconsistent driving speeds or erratic steering.
SYSTEM DATA RESULTS:
The vehicle Cassandra Deacon drove on December 12, 2023, tested positive for:
● BLUETOOTH SENSOR
The paper almost slipped out of my hand, as I sat up in a panic.
There was no way, my dry throat swallowed hard as my mind try to make up a feasible answer for what I was reading.
Blue Wheels had physical proof that a device was being used while Cassie was driving. My face clouded with uneasiness and within seconds I was flipping through the rest of the paperwork to see if there was anything else.
But that was it.
Fuck, I guess the pre-trial must have lit a fire under their asses because this won’t look good. At least not to Judge Hickerson. Cassie didn’t have to try and prove a damn thing for me to believe her. I could’ve found photos of her holding her phone behind the wheel and I still would have believed her.
Okay… maybe not, but I still would have heard her out.
Luckily, it looks like there hasn’t been any supporting evidence that has been filed, which means there was no real proof that the Bluetooth device that was being used, was a phone.
But that also raises the question.
If it wasn’t a phone, then what was it?