4. Cruz
4
CRUZ
I fucked up. The minute Tara stood up to leave, I knew I’d said the wrong thing. I wanted to make her stay and see things my way, but maybe letting her walk away will be easier.
“What the hell was that?” My sister is hovering over me like she’s ready to fight.
Shit. My sister is mad, and it’s never a good thing when she’s pissed at me because I feel like shit. “What? It’s true. Look at her. No one is going to believe we’re together.”
Lexi’s face scrunches up. She opens her mouth, closes it, and then opens it again. She sits back down and shakes her head. “Wait. Spell it out. What are you saying?”
I roll my eyes. My sister is smart. She graduated top of her class in high school and is on the dean’s list at college every semester, but sometimes she just doesn’t get it. “Well, I’m assuming you want me to be her date for the wedding because you all want to make people think she’s moved on and is over the ex.”
Lexi nods. “Yeah, and not let her sister think she won again.”
I lean back in my chair and cross my arms over my chest. “Right, well, no one is going to believe we’re dating.”
She clenches her eyes and opens them wide. “Why not?” she blurts out.
I chuckle. “Come on, sis. I’m ten years older than her. I’m officially a has-been, and?—”
She interrupts me. “Wait… you think that no one will believe it because no one will believe she likes you?”
I nod. “Yep.”
She slaps her hand on the table between us. “Oh my God, Cruz. How dense can you be? I swear, I see women throwing themselves at you after every game. You could literally have a different woman to date every day for a year.”
I screw my face up the more she talks because nothing of what she is saying sounds good in the least. “Tara isn’t like those women.”
She slaps her hand on the table again. “Cruz, you just made Tara think that you didn’t want to do this because people wouldn’t believe you two would be together.”
“They wouldn’t,” I say pointedly.
“Cruz! You made it sound like she’s beneath you… like you would never go out with someone like her… like people would riot if you two were even in the same room together.”
I open my mouth to disagree with her but then stop myself, remembering the look on Tara’s face when I made the claim that no one would believe we’d be together. I definitely hurt her. Is that what she took me to mean? Did she really think I was saying she wasn’t good enough?
I shake my head. “That’s not what I meant… at all.”
She bolts to her feet. “Well, you need to apologize.”
When I don’t get up fast enough, she sits back down. “Cruz, what’s going on with you?”
I put my hands on the table and lean forward. “Look, maybe this is for the best. My life is changing right now, and no sane person is going to want to get mixed up in all this. The press is going to have a field day with my retirement. It could be good, or it could go really badly, and I really don’t want your friend to be caught up in all that.”
She holds up a finger. “It’s one date. That’s it. I’m not asking you to marry her or anything.” She stops and looks at me wide-eyed. “Look, like she said, this is her sister and her ex-boyfriend’s wedding. You know it’s going to suck. And yes, I have friends at school I can get to go with her, but I want you to do this for me.”
I lean forward. “Why me?”
She shrugs. “Because she’s my best friend. Because she would literally jump in front of a bullet to take care of someone she loves, but she lets people walk all over her. Because I know this wedding is going to be hard, and her family thinks she’s flighty and disappointing?—”
My eyebrows rise. “Disappointing?”
She nods her head in big movements. “Yes. They wanted her to go to college and get a dependable profession. They hate that she’s a florist.” She leans on the table. “Anyway, yes, I can get someone else to go with her, but I want someone that is going to protect her… someone that will defend her and be there when the shit hits the fan.”
It’s on the tip of my tongue to say I’ll do it. Just the thought that someone is giving Tara a hard time goes all through me. I could go, stand by her side, and no one will say anything out of the way to her. Most people know not to mess with me. But just as I’m about to say it, I know I can’t.
The truth is there’s a part of me that has always been attracted to Tara, and I know this is a bad idea. I’m not even sure I can make it through one night of acting like we’re together without letting her know I really am attracted to her.
I run my hand over my chin. “One night?”
She tilts her head to the side. “Well, it’s a little more than one night. The wedding is out at Sugar Lake. People are staying the weekend for the rehearsal dinner and the wedding. So technically, it’s a weekend.”
I hold my hands up, shaking my head. “No way. There’s no way I can do a whole weekend, Lexi.”
She wants to argue with me, but she surprises me by giving up. “Fine.”
Instantly guilt sets in. I never tell my sister no, but it’s more than that. I don’t want to leave Tara to deal with this on her own. I can only imagine how she feels knowing that her sister and her ex-boyfriend are getting married. Talk about a shit show.
But I can’t do it. I barely know Tara, but I’m attracted to her, and I’m not wanting to go down that road. The only thing I have to offer anyone is a one-night stand, and I can’t do that to my sister’s best friend. Not that she’d be interested anyway. Hell, all she wants to do is use me. It may not be for my fame or money, but she’s wanting to use me all the same. No, it’s better if I don’t get involved.
“Fine,” my sister repeats. “But I need you to apologize to Tara. You hurt her feelings, and even though you didn’t mean to, it happened all the same. She’s my best friend, and you’re my brother; you two are the most important people in the world to me, and there can’t be hurt or bad feelings between you.”
“I’ll take care of it.”
Lexi looks at me with doubt, and I force a smile on my face that I’m not feeling. “Come on, have I ever lied to you? I’ll fix it.”
She nods and leans back in her chair. I wave at the manager, and when he comes over, I hand him my credit card.
After leaving a big tip and thanking the manager and his team profusely, Lexi and I walk outside. I open her door for her and then get into the driver’s side of my SUV. “Where you going?”
“To the florist shop.”
I put the car into gear. “Is Tara working this time of night?”
She turns toward me. “She could be. I mean, I wouldn’t put it past her. But her apartment is above the shop.”
I drive toward town. “What’s been going on with you? We haven’t gotten to talk about you.”
Lexi takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “School is about it. Chemistry is about to kick my ass, that should be expected because I hate science. But I’m determined to get an A.”
It’s only a few blocks to the florist shop, and I park in front of it. “What about a social life? You can’t do school work all the time.”
She shrugs, but I don’t let her off the hook. “Lexi, come on, are you getting out doing things? Are you dating?”
She shrugs, and it’s that right there that hits me. There’s a sadness about her lately, and I’ve tried to not worry because I know she has a lot on her plate, but I can’t help it. I have a guilt inside me that I’ve traveled so much through the years, always in and out of town. She is my priority, but I had to work so I could send her to school and give her the life she deserves.
“Lexi…” I say when she doesn’t respond.
“No, bub, I’m not dating anyone. There was someone I liked, but well, it didn’t work out.”
“Is that why… I mean, I know something’s been bothering you lately.” I stop and blow out a breath. Fuck, I wish I was better at this. I wish our mom was still here. “Do I need to kick some kid’s ass?”
Lexi blurts out a laugh. “Really? No, I’m fine. Broken hearts happen. It’s fine. I’m fine, and I’ll get over it.”
I get out of the SUV and walk around to let her out. She stands up, and I continue our conversation. “What can I do?”
She avoids my gaze. “Nothing. I’m fine, I promise.”
“You know you can talk to me.”
She finally looks at me, and the sadness in her eyes is clear now. She shrugs her shoulders. “I know I can talk to you, but I need to deal with this on my own.”
I hate that answer. I want to be the one she talks to and take all her burdens away. I run my hand through the scruff on my chin. “Okay, but if you need anything…”
She puts her arms around my waist and hugs me. “I know, Cruz. If I need anything, you will be the first person I call. I promise.”
I take a deep breath and hug her against me. “I love you, sis.”
She nods her head. “I know you do. I love you too.”
She releases me and pokes a finger in my chest. “You’re still not off the hook. You have to apologize to Tara.”
I look at the flower shop and then at the windows upstairs, and the lights are low. “I will. I’ll stop by here in the next day or two and apologize.”
She looks at me doubtfully, but I’m quick to assure her. “I promise. I’ll make this right.”
She hugs me again and then walks over to the door next to the florist shop. “I’ll see you later, brother. Good luck on Wednesday.”
Instantly, the thought of my retirement announcement comes to mind, and I hate to think about it, but I force a smile to my face, nod, and wave bye to her.
I wait until she’s behind the door and then get back into my SUV to drive to my huge, empty house… alone.