Chapter 9
August
A fter waiting outside his apartment for an hour in the pale, chilled sunlight, I meander through town, looking for signs of Bjorn. I wish I had my hiking stick he made me. My ankle protests with every step. The trouble is, there are quite a few orcs here—all green, bulky, strong. Like Pavlov’s dog, at the sight of each of them, my heartbeat flutters in anticipation. Then my heart falls into my boots when I realize that once again, it isn’t him.
I check the search and rescue station—empty. Green Orc Grocers. Moonfang Library. Moonlit Grounds Café and Bakery.
At Moonlit Grounds, Ravena tsks as I tell her my story and makes me a special tea to go. I asked for coffee, but after one look at me, she said my nerves needed something calmer. She wasn’t wrong. “A special blend for a special person.” That’s not weird at all. And she wouldn’t let me pay her. Just gave me a wink.
On my way to the brewery—his brother Koru runs it, I think he said, my hopes are high, only to be dashed when the place is locked up. Several pickup trucks sit outside, people sitting in them. I see heads swivel to look at me, hoping I’m going to unlock the door to the golden elixir for them.
Hungry, chilled to the bone and shivering (despite the tea), and sore as fuck from my jaunt up the mountain, I slump down against the side of the building. My ankle is swollen, a painting of mottled blues and purples. I’ve made a royal mess of things now, and all because I was too mad and distracted to call May last night and tell her I was okay.
I hear him before I see him. His heavy footfalls crunch the gravel at the edge of the building. A growl, snort, and then my name. Opening my eyes against the light, he’s here. Bjorn is here, squatting beside me, his hand hovering over my outstretched leg. A weird déjà vu swirls around me as he asks if I’m okay, if he can touch me. I nod yes, then break out in ugly tears. Mad that I’m so emotional, I cry harder. I can’t imagine that he wants anything else to do with me after this.
My stomach flips like I’m on a roller coaster as he scoops me up into his arms and stands as if he has picked up a feather and not my disheveled, teary-eyed, grumpy ass. “I’m so sorry. I was trying to find you. May and Chad...” The words stick in my throat.
Bjorn doesn’t seem to care. I hear him whispering, and then the creak of the brewery door opens. Wafts of barley, beer, and coffee hit my senses as I’m carried through and into the cozy inside.
Before Bjorn can set me down, I wrap my arms tighter around his neck and burrow my face into the space where his neck and chest meet. “Please don’t leave me. Don’t let me go.”
We sit, me in Bjorn’s lap. Koru throws an ice pack on the table and Bjorn gingerly sets it on my ankle, which is stretched out on the booth bench. I murmur my thanks, but Koru has already stomped back into the kitchen.
“You’re safe,” he says, one hand making small circles on my back as he holds me.
“Did the police find you?” I ask, scared of the answer. One curt nod. “I’m so sorry. May and her asshat boyfriend—” I don’t get to finish my rant.
“Listen, I would do anything to keep you safe. Apparently, our rendezvous is going to be in the news. Small town gossip fodder. So, we are going to go our separate ways until it dies down. I know it isn’t fair to ask you to suffer just because I’m an orc who didn’t follow every proper protocol.” His voice is strained as each word comes out.
“What are you talking about? I don’t care about gossip or newspapers. I care about you.”
“May explained how hard the last few months have been for you. I want to give you the best possible future. That means not being associated with me.” With that, he slides me off his lap and onto the worn wooden booth, then leaves me to spiral. What does he mean ‘May explained’?
When he returns with bowls of steaming spicy stew and mugs of hot cocoa, my stomach erupts in growls that make him laugh. I wipe my tears and dig in, unable to form a coherent thought while my stomach tries to leap out of my body to claim the food.
“I don’t know how May found you before me, but I want you to know that whatever she said doesn’t matter.” I’ve scraped my bowl clean, and to say that my full stomach is now fueling my anger would be an understatement.
How dare she interfere after what Chad did?
And how dare he listen to her instead of me?
“She pulled into the station as I was leaving to find you. The damned police wouldn’t tell me if you were safe or not. I worried something happened to you after you left this morning. So if nothing else, she put me at ease.”
“But telling you how hard life has been? Making you think you’re responsible? That’s nonsense. Yes, I’ve been untethered since my mom passed away, and I’ve been a bit nomadic, trying to find my place in the world.” I stop to flutter my eyes at the ceiling, trying to prevent the tears that are filling my eyes from falling. I hate crying. Hate showing that I’m weak. Missing my mom won’t bring her back. Showing Bjorn I’m a hot mess isn’t going to win him over.
When I catch my breath again, certain I won’t cry, I look at Bjorn across from me, and my heart melts with the tender expression in his eyes. No one has ever looked at me this way before. It’s startling, comforting, unsettling, and delicious, all at once. He reaches his hand out across the table, an invitation. I take it. The heat from him is a tingle that spreads through my hand and up my arm to my chest. His fingers are thick, fat, and as they close around my fingers, I think I want to stay like this forever, protected by him.
“Bjorn, I don’t know how to say this. You are the only person who has ever made me feel seen. The only person ever to accept me at face value. What’d you say yesterday? Stubborn? Rash?”
“I think today I’d use the words headstrong and gorgeous and tantalizing.” At his low rumble, I squirm in my seat, heat slowly creeping up my neck to my cheeks. “I want the best for you. And it seems I am not the best.”
Shaking off the doom he just dropped, I squeeze his hand. “Don’t let my cousin’s opinion stop you, us, from being together. I can no longer respect her opinions and choices after yesterday and today. I want you. I want to be with you. In your pillow nest.” I clench my thighs, feeling sensations in my core when I picture us together in the nest he made me.
A sniff. He smiles. “You liked that?” Bjorn asks, but the fire in his eyes says he knows the answer. “You know, orcs have finely honed senses. I can see when you blush in the dark. And I can smell your arousal.” The words are barely there, kissing my spine with a shiver.
“Will you please take me to your home?” I ask, batting my lashes, not to prevent tears, but to encourage him. His chuckle is low and slow as he nods.
“I’d love that. But are you sure? I don’t have the most stellar reputation.” He gives me a long, serious look, as if he is inspecting my soul for signs of hesitation. There is none. Nodding, satisfied, he says, “Let me clean up and tell Koru bye. That orc is going to ride my ass hard for the rest of the month to ensure I stay out of trouble. Big brothers are the worst.”
He carries our empty bowls and mugs back to the kitchen while I let my mind imagine us together tonight, tomorrow, in a year, in ten years. My heart swells with excitement, trepidation, and something that might be close to love.