Chapter 22 #2
Allegra shrugged. “If a man is put off by such a minor scandal, then he isn’t right for me anyway.” She returned her brother’s skeptical look. “I already knew that from society’s treatment of Mama.”
Carenza cast her sister a grateful look. They might argue sometimes, but they were always loyal to each other.
“Allegra did caution me against placing the advertisement, and she was right to do so. But none of us could’ve imagined how it would blow up and involve others.”
“Was Julian Laurent supportive of this ridiculous idea?” her father asked.
“On the contrary. He was horrified,” Carenza said. “He tried everything he could to stop it becoming an even bigger scandal. That’s why I couldn’t allow his reputation to suffer.”
Her father glanced over at Dorian. “I suppose this is another fine example of women’s logic at work.”
“I have to agree, sir.”
The earl slapped his knees and stood up. “I told the butler to start closing up the house. I suggest you both go and pack.”
“We’re leaving?” Allegra asked.
“I don’t see any other way of managing this scandal, do you?”
“But I’ll need to inform people that we are going,” Allegra said desperately. “I have commitments—”
“Perhaps Allegra could stay on for a day or two and then follow us down?” Carenza, who had accepted her fate the moment her father came through the door, asked. “She’s very good at managing the staff.”
“I’d be happy to stay,” Allegra said. “And, as my reputation is truly ruined, I won’t even require a chaperone.”
Julian managed two days before his patience ran out. He’d had plenty to occupy his time dealing with the repercussions of the ball, instructing his barrister in case Walcott started up again, and calming down Aragon as he loudly took exception to anyone who said a bad thing about his brother.
He waited until it was dark and took a circuitous route to the back of Tavistock Square, through the mews, and into the well-kept garden behind the house.
There were a few lights on in the house, and no one stopped his progress.
He tiptoed past the kitchen and up the backstairs and emerged close to the drawing room at the front of the house.
He tapped lightly on the door and went in to find Allegra sitting alone by the fire.
“Lady Allegra.” He bowed. “I wanted to speak to Carenza.”
“You’re too late for that,” Allegra said. “She left two days ago with my father. I only stayed to close up the household and deal with the staff.”
Julian just stared at her. “Damnation.”
“My feelings exactly. Please sit down. I expected at least a few days’ grace, but none was offered.” Allegra sighed. “Father was most displeased, and Dorian was insufferable.”
“I thought that if they did come to town, they’d probably wish to speak to me,” Julian said. “In truth, I was expecting them at any moment.”
“Father decided all the fault lay with Carenza because she defended you to the last,” Allegra said. “She took all the blame on herself.”
Julian winced.
“You know that she is in love with you?” Allegra continued. “It is obvious to anyone who knows her well.”
“She … is remarkably good at hiding her emotions,” Julian said with some caution.
“That’s because Hector enjoyed baiting and belittling her. After a while, she learned to conceal her true feelings beneath an impenetrable layer of calm, and then he couldn’t hurt her so badly.”
Julian had nothing to say to that. He remembered what Aragon had told him about Hector’s decision to marry Carenza simply to cut him out. He grew angry all over again.
“Do you think I should write to her?” Julian asked.
“I think that whatever you choose to do is up to you, but if you hurt her, you will have me to reckon with.” Allegra glared at him. “I will not allow her heart to be broken again. So be very sure that you know what you want before you disturb her peace.”
Julian rose to his feet. “You are a very good sister.”
“I do my best.” Allegra shrugged. “For what it’s worth, I believe she does care for you very deeply, but that she is almost afraid to believe you might feel that way, too.”
“I asked her to marry me.”
“Did you?” Allegra looked startled. “And she turned you down?”
“She suggested she wasn’t good enough for me.”
“How ridiculous.” Allegra rolled her eyes and stood up. “She is the best woman I know.”
“I agree.” He took her hand and kissed it. “I wish you a safe journey back to Norfolk.”
“Thank you.” She paused. “Will we be seeing you at your family’s country home this year?”
“It’s highly likely.”
“Good.” She smiled at him. “Just promise me that you won’t make things worse.”
“I promise to try to make them better.”
He left and returned home to have his dinner, his thoughts racing.
Allegra had indicated that he did stand a chance with Carenza, but should he wait until she contacted him?
Or should he be bold, follow her back to Norfolk, and declare his undying love?
He was unsure of how to proceed because the stakes were so high.
Just because he’d realized almost immediately that he was taking his anger out on the wrong person, Carenza might not.
She’d learned from a master manipulator how to hide her feelings.
If she was at all unsure of Julian’s love, she might not grant him another opportunity to tell her how he felt.
“Mr. Laurent.”
He looked up as his butler came into the dining room, closely followed by Mrs. Sheraton.
“I beg your pardon, sir, but this lady was very insistent that she should see you.”
“That’s quite all right,” Julian said. “Perhaps you might fetch another wineglass for Mrs. Sheraton. Or would you care to dine with me, ma’am? I’m sure Cook could accommodate you.”
“Just the wine, please.” She sat opposite him at the table, her fingers drumming until the glass was filled and set in front of her. She looked pale, her mouth set in a hard line. “Thank you.”
“How may I be of assistance, ma’am?”
“How do you think?” She glared at him. “This is all your fault.”
“Hardly.” He might regret some of his actions, but not all of them. “You played your part.”
“I am aware of that.” She took a large gulp of wine.
“Why did you do it?” Julian asked. “Place the advertisement in all its unfettered glory in the first place?”
Mrs. Sheraton looked down at her glass. “Guilt, perhaps?”
Julian just looked at her.
She sighed. “And perhaps a little bit of jealousy?”
“Carenza didn’t deserve that.”
She raised her chin. “I am quite aware of that, but jealousy is not always a rational thing.”
“You resented her for being married to Hector?”
“God, no. It’s more that she survived him and moved on with her life, whereas I …” She grimaced. “I remained mired in guilt at having led him on for what I thought were the most virtuous of reasons. Namely, to expose him for what he was.”
“With respect, ma’am. Hector never needed to be led to anything. He just took whatever he could without caring about whom he hurt in the process. You are hardly to blame for his amoral nature.”
“It’s very kind of you to say so, but I still hurt my best friend.”
“And Hector hurt you and I failed miserably to hold him to account despite being his best friend.”
“Carenza told you about what happened?” She sighed. “Of course she did. She’s in love with you.”
“So everyone keeps telling me,” Julian murmured. He reached for his glass and drained it.
“One cannot blame her for being cautious,” Mrs. Sheraton said. “Hector—”
“Was a bad man, as my brother would say,” Julian completed her sentence. “I am aware of that.”
“Then what are we going to do to fix things?” Mrs. Sheraton looked at him. “Surely you have a plan.”
“I must confess that I have no idea what to do.”
“I don’t believe that for a minute,” Mrs. Sheraton said.
“It’s the truth.” Julian hesitated. “I’m not even sure how to approach her, let alone fix all the damage that’s been caused.”
Mrs. Sheraton finished her wine, and Julian poured her another glass. “I think you will have to be honest with her.”
“Not a strength of mine,” Julian admitted. “I’ve always avoided expressing my feelings.”
“Having seen the way your mother behaves toward you, I’m not surprised. She treats you like a poor relation who’s been foisted on the family.”
“Thank you.” Julian grimaced. “I was hoping I was the only one who noticed.” He drank more wine. “I think I will write to Carenza and see if she responds.”
“Coward.” Mrs. Sheraton drained her second glass.
“Perhaps,” Julian acknowledged. “But I am more than willing to go to Norfolk and speak to her in person if she doesn’t respond.”
“And if she does write back and she tells you never to speak to her again?” There was a challenge in Mrs. Sheraton’s gaze.
“Then I’ll definitely go to Norfolk.”
She held up her glass, and he clinked his against hers.
“I wish you success,” Mrs. Sheraton said. “I truly believe you are made for each other. You’re both so annoyingly perfect.”
“Thank you.” Julian went to pour more wine and realized the bottle was empty. “Would you care to join me in my study for a glass of brandy?”
“Thank you, but I think I should be getting home. I promised to tell Maude all the latest scandal.”
“Which is?”
“That Carenza is ruined, and that you are a noble hero, a man of good deeds who has been unfairly smeared by the jealous Mr. Walcott.” She stood up, her cheeks rather flushed.
“Carenza did that for you, Mr. Laurent. And for me. She didn’t even mention my name.
The least you can do is pay her back in kind. ”
My dear Carenza,
I can only apologize again and ask for forgiveness. I hope you are settled in Norfolk with your family. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you.
Your friend,
Julian Laurent.