Sixteen
My sleep’s been off.
Like most nights, I wake up in the dead of night, engulfed by an inferno and darkness, disorientation confusing me.
Tonight’s different. There’s something silky soft yet hard as a rock in my grip under the sheets that feels incredible to touch. That makes me feel like I belong, which screams all kinds of right.
Until I remember where I am.
Reed’s room… again.
I shudder, rapidly pulling my hand back from his cock, about to die from the craziness that’s my sleepwalking.
Why the heck am I touching him?
God, I’d die if he knew when I snuck into his bed in my sleepy daze that I was feeling him up. He’d lose his shit, seeing he’s been so distant from me, avoiding me at all costs. Yesterday, he saw me in the kitchen, and he literally spun on his heels and walked out. The fuck!
What’s wrong with me, anyway?
Why is it that his vanilla and plum scent is the most heavenly smell? I hate that I like anything that comes from him.
Panic surges through me at being caught by him and having to defend myself. I get it. He’s not interested, but he’s such a jerk about it.
I start to slip out of the bed, my foot pushing out from under the blanket, when his large hands drape over me, locking me in place. Gasping, I really don’t need him this close, not after his coldness.
For a long pause, I remain frozen, trying to take shallow breaths and calm my racing heart. That’s until he drags me toward him with a powerful wrench, one leg draped over mine, his enormous erection poking me in the hip. Then suddenly, his mouth is on my temple, as if he started to kiss me, then fell asleep halfway through.
Okay, what the hell is going on?
Gently, I reach for his fingers, pulling at them to pry them off me, but he’s like a damn tree branch that refuses to budge. Each time I shift, his grip tightens. Is he doing this on purpose, paying me back for being in his bed yet again?
Wait… fuck! He’s now kissing me in small pecks over and over in the same spot on the side of my face. Okay, this is freaking awkward. He’s got to be pulling a prank on me. I twist my head to cut him a sharp glare, but all I get are these kisses over my forehead and eye.
Shuffling and wriggling to pull away, he finally calms the hell down and has his head on my pillow. He’s breathing heavily, with a faint snore in his throat, and his eyelids are shifting as if he’s in a deep sleep.
Is this legit? He’s dreaming of kissing someone… me?
I’m just a girl in heat, and my body’s buzzing with electricity from his touches and his mouth on me. How am I supposed to ignore him when he teases me like this?
I glare at him in the dark, at the guy who’s been brushing me off. And here he is, cuddling me in his dreams. I can’t help but release a small snorting laugh, which I shut down instantly. He’d lose his mind if he caught us like this, no doubt not believing when I tell him the truth. What I need is his phone to record this.
Carefully, I maneuver again, trying to slide out without waking him up. My movements are deliberately slow, but he just pulls me closer, murmuring something incoherent. After what feels like an eternity of struggling, I finally wriggle free and slip out of bed.
Standing, I throw a look at him in the bed, snuggling my pillow now, and I snigger to myself. He’s sprawled out across the bed, his hair messy, his muscles across his back, and his arms bulging, but my gaze fixates on the wall of art on his body.
Remaining in his room a second longer is tempting fate, so I tiptoe out of the room, dragging the door mostly shut behind me. Then I breathe easy, and I can’t help but smile. Reed said he never wants a relationship, yet he’s craving it in his sleep.
I don’t know what his problem is with me, but I urgently need to find a way to stop entering his bed.
Sauntering through the quiet hallways, I make my way back, the floorboards cold under my bare feet. I’m in loose sweatpants and a short top showing my navel, but with long sleeves to cover my arms. The chill of the night loops around me.
The soft strumming of a guitar reaches me through the shadowy night. Someone else is awake. I move in the direction of the music until I reach a slightly ajar door.
Peering in, I find Seth.
He’s sitting on the floor at the foot of the bed, one leg stretched out, the other bent, with his guitar cradled in his lap. His eyes are closed, head tilted back slightly, completely engrossed in his music.
Seth’s in his element, the lamplight throwing shadows on his handsome face and over a loosely buttoned black shirt. Ink designs peek out from his shirt sleeves, and his signature earrings glint in the dim light. A long silver chain hangs from his neck, and the tattoo of the flame on his neck reminds me that I’m staring at a rock star idol.
A man creating a masterpiece song in a moment of raw creativity.
I quietly slip away from the door and slide down with my back to the wall outside his room, sitting down cross-legged. Closing my eyes, I let the music wash over me. It’s soothing yet intricate as it curls around me. The beat is slower, but I can already hear it with Jasper’s drums in my head. Breathless.
I’m lost in the melody, every note resonating with dreams I once had about singing, the same ones I’ve kept hidden for years. For the first time in so long, something inside me stirs a sense of peace inside me about my passion.
The longer I listen to his tune, the more it feels as though there’s an invisible thread connecting us, even without him knowing. I’m utterly entranced by his music. There’s a rawness to the tune, as if he’s pouring his heart into each note. I absolutely love the song.
He’s strumming his guitar, creating a melody that feels it’s meant just for me.
With my eyes closed, I quietly hum along to the addictive tune that’s imprinting itself on my mind. Sometimes, you hear a song and know instantly it’s everything. This is that melody. It takes me to another place, to a world with no worries and where fears fade away.
The music floats through me, my toes tapping.
Then it stops abruptly, and my eyes spring open.
Silence fills the house once more, and I figure he’s finished for the night.
“I know you’re out there,” Seth finally says.
My heart skips a beat.
“You gonna come in or pretend you’re not here?”
I laugh quietly and push myself to my feet before sauntering over and opening his door.
“Do you sing, Danica?” he asks out of the blue.
I pause in the doorway, staring at this gorgeous man, who looks like he’s just climbed out of bed, those eyes captivating. My heart races at his question.
“Oh, I don’t sing. Not at all.”
He’s on his feet, placing the guitar on his dresser before turning back to me with an arched eyebrow.
“I heard you humming out there, and back at Nocturne, you were belting out that song. Your voice was incredible.”
I squirm internally at his compliment. It comes from the promise I made myself after Dad’s death. I can’t sing, not in front of others, not for a foolish career, not after my decision made me lose my father. I breathe heavily while pushing a smile on my lips, so Seth doesn’t ask more questions.
“The club was super busy,” I say with a chuckle. “Pretty sure you heard wrong. And just before, it’s only a hum. I don’t sing. I can’t.”
He studies me, and I kick myself for overexplaining. Then he flops down on the edge of the bed.
“Okay. Anyway, I heard you were in a bit of trouble up on the rooftop the other day.” He pats the bed, offering me an invitation I simply can’t resist.
On fast feet, I cross the room and hop up on the bed on the opposite side of him. On the inside, I’m unsure if he’s referring to me being snatched by that loser, Jasper hurting him, or Reed catching Jasper and me in the elevator. Just thinking about it has my cheeks burning up.
Sitting on the bed with my feet folded under me, he turns to face me, legs crossed and leaning back on his arms.
“Did Jasper tell you about the incident?” I ask, studying him, trying to work out how much he knows.
My heart beats faster being this close to him again, inhaling his scorching hot scent that has me swaying. I glance at one of his pillows, contemplating grabbing it and pressing my face into it, inhaling his masculine ginger and oak scent. That’s how I know I’m not in control of myself in the slightest.
He nods in response, giving nothing away. In all honesty, I prefer not to talk about that day to anyone but Jasper. I’m too embarrassed, yet it’s a day I’ll never forget. I had sex for the first time with the drummer of Fever, of all Alphas. Just thinking of it brings tingles to my insides, but I’m easily distracted by Seth, who studies with his sharp gaze.
Seth nods, which I assume is in response to my question, but he doesn’t elaborate, and I hate that I want so badly to know what he found out. I keep my lips sealed before I embarrass myself more.
“How are you really feeling with your heat?” he finally asks, his tone sincere. “I’ve been so damn caught up with the upcoming tour, but I wish I could be around you more.”
Warmth creeps up my cheeks. “You don’t need to do that. I’m fine,” I lie terribly. When my heat comes, it rips me apart.
“Are you?” One of his thick eyebrows quirks up. “That’s not what Reed told me.”
My eyes widen in surprise. That bastard told him. I mentally kick myself for not smothering him to death with a pillow when I had the chance.
“Oh, he told you about… that,” I mumble, my face now on fire.
Seth chuckles softly. “Nothing to worry about. You’re with us to help you with your heat, to keep you safe from Nexus.”
I study his face, his calmness, which seems to be the opposite of how he normally is, but it’s late and he may be as exhausted as me.
“You’re one of the most sought-after guys in the world. Why are you wasting your time with someone like me?” I ask, scratching the side of my head.
He leans forward, resting his bent arms on his knees, a genuine smile spreading across his face.
“Do you know why we live in this old building instead of a penthouse or a mansion?”
I shrug. “So, your fans don’t find you?”
He shakes his head. “We promised ourselves that if we ever made it big, we’d never forget our roots. All three of us had shitty childhoods. This place has me feeling grounded, normal. Besides,” he says, grinning, causing butterflies to erupt in my stomach. “You’re someone I’m very interested in helping, and I want to know everything about you.”
“Seriously, I’m boring,” I say, hearing the tone of my voice while I’m gushing over him. But seriously, Seth needs to stop giving me that smoldering look and lowering his voice. It makes me go loony for him.
It’s a strange feeling being with Seth, someone so famous yet so down to earth. He makes me feel as though I’m just as important, that I’m so much more than an Omega in trouble. For the first time in so long, I feel like I’m being seen.
Seth leans in, and his hand reaches out to my shoulder as his fingers brush a piece of fluff from my shirt. A giddy rush sweeps through me at having him so close. It’s such a simple gesture, yet the hairs on my arms are standing on end from the electricity between us. He’s resting an arm on the bed between us, remaining close to me, and my breath catches as I stare into those captivating eyes.
I sway toward him as if I have no control over my body. Time stands still as my heart thumps loudly in my chest. I can practically hear the thundering in my ears.
He leans even closer, and my mind’s bursting. God, he’s going to kiss me. Sure, we’ve already kissed two times, but with Seth, each time feels brand new.
Our lips crash together in a fiery kiss. I want this so desperately. I have a hand on his neck to hold on as I lean into him. I slide it up to the back of his head and curl my fingers through his hair, which is surprisingly soft.
I’m not going to lie. Even with my limited experience, I consider myself a decent kisser. I’ve never had a guy complain. But when I kiss Seth, he takes it to a completely new level. There’s no aggression or speed, just a tenderness as though he savors every second and knows exactly what he wants. As if he’s thought about it beforehand, and now he’s making it real.
Swaying against him, my pulse is racing. I know one of Seth’s kisses can make me completely lose my heart to him. He places a hand on the back of my neck as he shuffles closer, the other hand scooping around my lower back, bringing me to him.
I’m cradled between his spread thighs, both of us still on our knees. I press myself closer, consumed with the urgency of having my body pressed flush against his. I rub my breasts against him, wanting to tease him as much as he does me, and I’m not talking about my heat. This is so much deeper.
Raw.
Uncomplicated.
Pure carnal desire.
I’ve been drawn to him since our first time at Nocturne, and things have only escalated between us.
His hand slides up my back and under my shirt. Then he scoops it around to the front and gropes one of my breasts since I don’t have anything under my top.
I moan hungrily, taking his tongue into my mouth. All scattered thoughts vanish as slick slips out of me. This tee and my sweatpants are my pajamas, so there’s no underwear to catch all my excitement. His big hand moves across to my other breast, pinching and tugging on my nipple as my body shudders.
Gasping into his mouth, he breaks our kiss, smiling so deviously, I’m convinced I’m about to orgasm.
He lifts my shirt to stare at my breasts.
“You want me to suck on your gorgeous tits?”
I’m breathing hard now, grasping his arms.
“Is this like a trick question?” I barely manage to stop myself from demanding he do it, right now.
“Then beg,” he says, his tone darkening.
I blink at him, his sudden shift taking me off guard, and as if catching me confused, he leans in and licks my lips.
“Hey, sweetheart, let me know if you want this. You’re going to devastate me, aren’t you?”
A moan rolls past my throat before I register it. I’m insatiable around him, as if my body responds addictively to the way he speaks to me.
He tugs my shirt down my chest and rakes his gaze over my body before lifting his gaze to mine.
“It’s okay, good girls wait.”
I grab hold of his hand, not wanting to let go.
“It’s not a no,” I murmur in a moment of awkwardness. “You just surprised me.”
He smiles, and it’s easy to see that there’s something much darker behind his gaze when he looks at me. Placing his hand on the side of my neck, he holds me like he has control over me.
“When you need me for your heat, I will be at your beck and call. I will give you everything you desire and so much more. I’m dying to experience your heat’s hunger firsthand, but sometimes, I like to experiment, to have so much more with you.”
“You want to dominate me, don’t you?” I ask, thinking of his command for me to beg him.
“Will that be a problem?” His thumb runs the length of my jawline.
My hard nipples brush against the fabric of my shirt each time I move even a smidgen.
“I’m willing to try anything for you, sir,” I answer playfully, unsure how I ended up in this conversation, but I’m enjoying discovering the layers of these Alphas. They aren’t exactly how they appear at first glance. The more I think about it, Seth being dominating shouldn’t be a surprise. He controls the band, he’s the lead singer, and I’ve seen Jasper and Reed fall into line with his final word.
“I like how those words fall from your pretty lips.” He pulls back and sits on his heels, studying me with pure confidence on his face. He’s completely in control of the situation, of me. I see that now.
My breathing grows erratic, as though I’ve forgotten how to draw air into my lungs. Then he flashes me a smile, like he’s a wolf, and I want to be his prey. I bite down on my lower lip as I clench my thighs at the arousal spiraling through me like a tornado at the thought of being dominated by him.
Suddenly, I’m super aware of how close we are, how intense his Alpha scent teases me, how his jeans are tenting over his cock. I stare into those deep blue eyes that are speckled with gold. How have I not noticed them before now?
Desire thunders through me, and I can’t help but think that he might have unleashed a hidden kink inside me I didn’t know I had. With it comes an unbearable need that has me close to salivating. So does a slight trepidation that I’m not thinking straight, and when I discover he won’t want me after my heat, I’ll be broken beyond fixing.
A voice tells me I’m already too far gone, yet I’m pulling away from the bed.
“I-I should probably go to sleep,” I murmur, my feet already carrying me to the door, my head spinning with emotions I can’t make sense of. I can’t explain it, but the reality of what I’m playing with promises to leave me broken. I feel it so hard that it terrifies me.
I never should have done anything with Jasper, either, as I’m asking for heartache.
It’s easier if I tell myself that their pack is helping me with my heat. Even Jasper’s words in the elevator were spoken in a moment of heady arousal. What if they find out they don’t want an imperfect Omega? Can I deal with that?
My gaze clashes with Seth’s blue one, and at that moment, I realize the reason his proposal worries me is that I’m falling for him. I promised myself I wouldn’t let that happen… I don’t know what to do, so I turn and rush out of his room.