Chapter 22
I staredat my cracked phone. My cheek pressed against the wooden kitchen table.
Why hasn’t he called yet?
Maybe Giancarlo’s angry that I freaked out.
I couldn’t help it. Hearing some random guy cry out for help would make anyone freak out. I groaned as I tapped the phone, the light turned on, and the plain background appeared, rubbing it in my face that I had no missed calls or messages.
I flicked it open, and my fingers hovered over Giancarlo’s name.
Call him!
What if he doesn’t answer? What if he’s still busy—murdering someone?
My brain was no help. I groaned as I banged my forehead on the table. The glassware rattled.
How stupid was it that I wanted to call Giancarlo to ask if I should call Giancarlo? The indecisiveness of my nature was ruining my life. His contact sat there haunting me, but what was more pressing was the quietness of the house. My skin crawled. I thought about turning the television on, but I knew it wouldn’t do me any good, not when I’d become used to having Giancarlo’s company.
“What should I do?”
Of course, there was no answer from my phone. I let it slip between my fingers and rest on the table. I closed my eyes as the first ringing sound fluttered to my ears.
“Oh shit!” I grabbed the phone staring at it as I called Giancarlo.
Hang up! No! Yes!
If I hung up, I could play it off as a butt dial later. I want to hear his voice. It had only been a few hours, and I was acting like he’d been gone another eight days.
“Hello?” Giancarlo’s smooth voice washed over me.
I swallowed back the small noise that almost left me. “Hey.”
“You okay?”
No. I had a run-in with my dad. I don’t know what to do about how I’m feeling toward you. I don’t know what you will think.“Yes.”
“Oh.”
My chest tightened at the single-word reply. What did that mean?
“Gin—”
“I’m walking through the door. Let’s talk.”
The line died just as the sound of the front door opening had me jumping out of my chair and racing out of the kitchen. I stopped just as Giancarlo tossed his keys in a small bowl near the entrance. We both froze there, neither of us talking or moving. It wasn’t like we were shocked. He’d just told me he was home, and yet I almost couldn’t believe my eyes that he was actually home.
“Kid—”
“Where were you?”
Giancarlo stood up straighter. For the first time since he walked in, I noticed the plate he had in his hand. Had he already eaten? I couldn’t squash the uncomfortable feeling that took over me knowing that Giancarlo had eaten without me. It was stupid; of course, he did things without me.
“I went to see Enzo and Tex.”
I mustered up a nod and plastered on a familiar smile. Although grinning wasn’t what I wanted to do. “Okay.” I turned on my heels and headed back to the kitchen.
“Wait!” Giancarlo’s heavy footfalls were right behind me. “Ash, I said wait.” His hand wrapped around my arm and pulled me to a stop.
I didn’t dare look back at him. I felt so heavy it was impossible to keep up the fake smile.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.”
I tugged at his hold, and he released me. The heaviness plaguing me only increased. Breathing was becoming a burden with the tightness in my rib cage. I didn’t want him to let me go either. Fuck, my brain and heart were at war. One knew what it wanted, and the other had no fucking clue.
“Look, about what you heard.” Giancarlo took a step back.
I took a peek at him. Watching a big terrifying mobster teeter on the balls of his feet and rub the back of his neck as he tried to talk to me was almost comical. For a split second, all the heaviness lifted, and laughter bubbled free.
Why in the hell is he so nervous? If any of us should be a nervous wreck, it’s me.
I grabbed his hand and moved into the kitchen. “One second, let me put this all away.”
“What is this?”
I stared at the table full of the food I’d ordered. It had been cold by the time I’d made the long as-hell track back home, but warming up shit didn’t take a rocket scientist.
Shrugging, I grabbed a few of the plates. “Nothing.”
Giancarlo was next to me in a second, taking the plates from my hands and placing them back on the table. “It’s not nothing. You got me food too?”
“I figured you’d be hungry after... exerting so much energy.”
“And you’re okay with how…I exerted the energy?”
“I’m not not okay with it.” That was the best answer I could give. “Either way, it doesn’t matter what I think. I’m yours until I’ve paid you back.”
My heart fluttered. The most ridiculous thought flickered through my mind.
I never want to pay him back. I want to be Giancarlo Vitale’s forever.
It wouldn’t happen in a million years. However, it was now added to a long list of daydreams.
“Where do you think you’re going?” Giancarlo asked.
He grabbed me and pulled our bodies close together. His dark gaze bore into me.
“I’m not leaving.”
Giancarlo’s hold eased slowly until, finally, he took a step back. Instantly my body missed the heat that radiated off of him.
“Let’s eat.” Giancarlo rounded the table and plopped down in his seat. He grabbed his plate, cutting into the steak without hesitation. The first moan of happiness made the tiny ball of knots untie in the pit of my stomach.
“But you already did.” I pointed at the plate he left at the edge of the table.
“Oh, that I stole from Enzo’s house.”
I shook my head and sat across from him. He was digging in as if he was starving. “Why?”
“It will drive him crazy.”
Why rested on the tip of my tongue again, but I swallowed it back. It was who Giancarlo was as a person.
“You should return it tomorrow.”
“No way. Whose side are you on, kid?” He pointed a fork at me, a piece of steak hanging off it. “Be careful how you answer me.”
That dangerous tone was back, the one my body couldn’t help but respond to now. When had that happened? Had I always been like this?
“I’ll always be on your side.” I poured syrup over my pancakes, excited as hell to finally dig into them. “But you shouldn’t keep his plate. He might come here and—” I looked up to find Giancarlo staring at me with wide eyes.
“What?” I squirmed in my seat, trying to figure out why he was looking at me like that.
“Always, huh?”
“What?”
“You said you will always be on my side.” Giancarlo placed his fork down and leaned forward. “Even if I kill someone?”
I swallowed thickly. I knew the answer he wanted, and I knew the moral answer as well. Meeting Giancarlo’s dark brown eyes, I answered. “I want to be.”
The air in the kitchen grew hotter and thicker with every passing second. It was the truth; I wanted things that weren’t possible between us. Still, more than anything, I wanted to have Giancarlo’s back as he had mine. He looked out for me more than anyone I knew. He pushed me outside of my box, and as annoying as it was, sometimes it was beneficial too.
“Your food is going to get cold,” I said, breaking the momentary silence between us.
The air between us grew relaxed. The ball in my stomach eased up, and I ate my food. This was better than being alone any day. Although I had the chance to eat at the diner, I realized I preferred the company of the man before me.
I had a lot to think about.
* * *
I wokeup at five in the morning. My nightstand was void of any notes. Was he home, or did he not leave a note this time? My stomach clenched with the second thought, but I ignored it as I hopped out of bed. I ran down the hall, sliding to a stop at Giancarlo’s door. I raised my hand to knock, only for it to open. My fist stayed poised in the air as I stared up at Giancarlo. He was shirtless, his hair disheveled, and his beard thicker than usual. He looked sexy as hell. My cock twitched as desire wove around me like grape vines.
“Morning, kid.”
“Morning, sir.”
Giancarlo groaned. “Someone’s asking for their dick to be sucked this morning.” He chuckled as he moved past me. His door closed behind him.
I wasn’t laughing. My body hummed with need as I thought about Giancarlo’s mouth wrapped around my cock.
“Are you coming down for breakfast?” Giancarlo shouted.
“Coming.”
“Not yet, you ain’t,” Giancarlo shouted back.
I groaned as I palmed my cock. He was being a damn tease. It had been forever since we had sex, and I was no addict, but I was starting to feel withdrawals. Giancarlo’s hot ass plagued my every waking moment and my dreams.
“Why are you up so early? Do you have to go… to work?”
Giancarlo eyed me as he grabbed a few pans out. “No, I don’t have work.” He air-quoted the word with a smile on his face. “I have a few files I need to go over, but I can do that from home.”
Yes, he’s staying home!
“You look so happy.”
“Do I?” I rubbed my cheeks. “I’ll make the coffee.” It was about all I was good for.
“Never used to get up this early. Now I have a damn puppy, and my sleep schedule has gone to hell,” Giancarlo muttered.
“I’m not a dog.” I glared at him. The brute had the nerve to laugh at me. I swear he said shit to get under my skin. “If either one of us is a dog, it’s you. A big bull mastiff. Drool like one too.”
Giancarlo’s eyebrows nearly kissed his hairline. “Is that so? Look at the puppy’s little teeth showing. Or maybe you’re changing into a kitten now. You were a scared little bunny when we first met.”
I internally groaned. “What is wrong with you? Why are you comparing me to animals?”
“Baby animals.” He grinned. “Eh, mostly because you lash out when I do it.”
“Something is mentally wrong with you.”
Giancarlo laughed. “Oh, you have no idea.”
“I do.” We’d spent so much time together. I made sure to study everything I could about Giancarlo as we did. It was a habit at first, but the longer I stayed with him, the more I wanted to know about this man.
Giancarlo’s phone rang. Reaching over, he picked up with a scowl. He was such a baby. He hated having to do things in the morning. The only time he wasn’t angry in the morning was either because of sex or really good food.
“What?”
I tuned him out as I dug into my food. It was a simple breakfast, but every bite was heaven. If I never had to cook again and only eat Giancarlo’s cooking, I would.
“Yeah, I’m working from home. Yes, I will get everything done.” Giancarlo smiled at me and reached over to wipe the corner of my mouth. “Benito, you and I both know I’m good at what I do. I’ll have everything over by the end of the day.” He hung up.
“Busy day? If you have to leave—”
Giancarlo stuffed his mouth and waved his hand at me. “I don’t. Don’t worry, puppy. Once I’m done with work, I’ll take you to the park or on a walk.”
I rolled my eyes at him. “You’re a regular comedian.” I leaned over the table and gave him my best stare. He didn’t look too impressed. “Ever think it’s you who needs a collar and leash on their neck? After all, Gin, you look best on your hands and knees.”
Giancarlo coughed and sputtered as he beat on his chest. I hid my grin behind my coffee mug, trying my damndest not to crack up.
“Oh, you’re asking for it, kid.”
Maybe I am.
We finished breakfast too soon. I wanted to shower with Giancarlo, but Benito’s call sounded serious. I didn’t want to get in the way of his work. After my shower, I dressed, not bothering to dry my hair as I sought out Giancarlo.
I was like metal to a magnet. I found him with ease already in his home office. He rarely used the place. I’d dusted it twice since living with him. I moved into the space and watched him. He wore a white button-up and black slacks as if he was really in the office. Stacks of paperwork sat before him, the glow of his dual computer screens lighting up his face.
He has a lot of work to do. I should leave him.I didn’t move at first, content to stand there, watching him. Finally, I forced my body to move. I could busy myself until he was done.
I wasn’t that dependent on him, was I?
“Where are you going?” Giancarlo asked. His gaze never wavered from the papers in his hands.
“To my room.”
Giancarlo’s brows dipped. I wondered what was going through his head.
“You can stay.”
A smile tugged at my lips. I wanted to stay even if I wasn’t doing anything but sitting beside Giancarlo as he read. Being near him made me feel at ease. Even knowing his hands were drenched in blood, I still wanted him to touch me. To hold me close.
“I need to go clean.”’
“I can get someone to do it.”
I shook my head before he could finish. “No, I can’t cook. It”s the least I can do.” Plus, if I stay around you any longer, my heart and cock may explode. I’m not up for either of them erupting.
Giancarlo looked up at me. “Okay. You don’t have to do too much.”
I nodded and left the office. I rubbed my chest. Stupid thing. It didn’t know what it wanted. I’d heard plenty of times that losing your virginity made you into a lovesick puppy. Sex was amazing, but it wasn’t the only draw to the monster I wanted to call my own. Giancarlo was the first person to be nice—well, not nice, but the first person to see me for who I was. This constant back and forth wasn’t helping me in the slightest.
I’ll leave it up to Giancarlo.
Before I knew it, I was done with the kitchen. I made tea and brought it up to Giancarlo. He was on the phone, and I paused in the office, hearing him talk. I knew Giancarlo wasn’t stupid, but I hadn’t expected him to sound so sophisticated.
“Plans are moving forward now. Yes, all the forms have been filed with the city. If you’re having any issues, I can contact the correct department to get things moving forward. Ah, thank you so much.” He waved me over.
I shook myself free of the momentary stupor and placed the cup down. I went to back up, but Giancarlo grabbed me before I could make it more than a step away.
“I understand. The plans so far are very reasonable.” He shut his mouth as the person on the other line began talking. I couldn’t make out more than a few muffled words.
Giancarlo mouthed thank you. My body was moving before my mind had time to understand what I was doing. Our lips briefly slid over each other. I yanked back, grinning at him shyly. I slipped free of his hold as he stared at me wide-eyed. I was out of his office before he could say anything.
What the fuck was I thinking?My heart hammered in my chest as I pressed my hand against it. I was thinking that Giancarlo has soft lips.
I touched my lips. They still tingled from the small peck. I shook my head and raced down to my room.
Clean, think about cleaning. I forced my body to move, to pick up and dust. Slowly I lost myself in the act of tidying up.
“Hey, kid.”
I poked my head out of the room. Giancarlo was leaning against the wall, his arms crossed.
“Yes?”
“What are you doing?”
I cocked my head to the side. It was pretty clear what I was doing, but I answered him anyway. “Cleaning… why?”
Did Giancarlo want to have sex? I’d mostly backed off after he turned me down multiple times. He didn’t think I was sincere or some crap. Truth be told, it was taking everything in me not to attack him. My cock was constantly hard near him, and I wanted nothing more than to feel the tight heat of his ass around my dick.
“Just asking.” Giancarlo turned away.
I glanced back at the unmade bed. I’ll handle it later. I raced after Giancarlo and grabbed his arm. “What did you want to ask me?”
Giancarlo looked at me. A nervous look came over his face again. “Fuck this shit.” He grabbed my arms, slamming me up against the wall. He hovered over me, caging me in. My heart rammed against my chest, and I offered myself willingly. His lips met mine in a fiery passion-filled kiss. I grabbed his shirt and pulled it out of his slacks. My fingers craved bare skin. The moment it came in contact with Giancarlo’s torso, I groaned into the kiss.
More.
I bit his lip, working my hands around his waist. I slipped my hands into his pants, my nails digging into his ass. A shiver of desire rushed through me.
“Fuck, kid, slow it down.”
“No.”
Giancarlo let out a deep groan. “Fuck, that’s hot. Okay, but let me get this out.”
“You can get out whatever you need to with my cock buried inside you.” Sometimes I didn’t know where the stuff that came out of my mouth came from, and other times, I knew it was unavoidable. Giancarlo pulled it out of me. This ravenous, uncontrollable, demanding man. When I was with him, I felt in control of my life. I felt like… me.
“Room.” Air sawed in out of my lungs like I ran a marathon.
Giancarlo ripped his shirt off. The buttons flew everywhere, clattering against the hardwood floor. “Fuck me right here!”
My heart hammered against my ribcage as I shook my head. “No, I want…” I licked my lips, still tasting Giancarlo. “I want more than one round. Your hand is still healing. I don’t think you’re going to be able to do anything in the wrong position for very long.”
Giancarlo looked ready to argue with me. I did the one thing I knew would shut him up. I pushed up on my tippy toes and kissed him again. “Bed now, please.”