Pawliday Love

Chapter 9

CHAPTER NINE

DANIELLE

S unlight streams through the window as I stretch, my body deliciously sore from last night's activities.The bed beside me is empty but still warm, and the aroma of bacon and coffee drifts through the air.For one perfect moment, everything feels right.

Then reality crashes in. What happens now?

Scout lifts his head from his bed, watching as I pace the room.My hands shake slightly as I move to bolt the door, needing privacy for what I'm about to do.My phone shows three missed calls from the gallery, but I scroll past them to Jasmine's contact.If anyone can talk me through this, it's her.

She picks up on the second ring."Danny? Everything okay? You never call this early."

"Your brother's here." The words tumble out."At the cabin. With me."

"Derek's in Serenity?" Jasmine's voice sharpens with interest."Since when? That workaholic hasn't left Manhattan in months."

"Since yesterday when I showed up and found him here instead of Aunt Sue and Uncle Tommy." I sink onto the bed, pulling my knees to my chest."And we... God, Jas, we slept together."

"Finally!" She practically squeals."I knew you two idiots would figure it out eventually.Tell me everything."

I explain about the note, the storm, decorating the tree.My voice softens as I describe the kiss on the couch, how natural it felt falling back into us."It's like the past four years just melted away."

"You're glowing through the phone right now," Jasmine teases."I haven't heard you sound this happy in ages."

"That's what terrifies me." My voice cracks."In a week I'll be back in Utah, he'll be in New York, and nothing will have changed.He'll still choose his career over everything else.Over me. Again."

"Has he actually said anything about leaving?"

"He doesn't have to." I twist the hem of my sweater."I can't ask him to give up his dreams any more than he can ask me to give up mine.Long distance is hard enough when both people are fully committed, but Derek... you know how he gets with work.Remember last Christmas when he missed your birthday because of some merger?"

"Okay, yes, my brother can be an absolute idiot about priorities sometimes," Jasmine admits."But Danny, I've never seen him as lost as he was after you.He threw himself into work because it was easier than admitting he made a mistake. Sort of like you did, right?"

"That doesn't change the fact that we want different things." I blink back tears."His life is in New York now.Mine's in Utah. The gallery show I've been working toward for years opens in February.I can't just abandon that."

"Stop." Jasmine's voice turns stern."You're creating problems that don't exist yet.Tell me honestly how you really feel about my brother?"

My throat tightens as all my bottled feelings float to the surface. "My feelings never changed," I whisper."That's what makes this so hard.I never stopped loving him. Even when I hated him for leaving, I loved him.Even when I tried dating other guys, I compared them all to him.He's just... he's Derek." My voice breaks on his name.

"Then stop sabotaging your happiness because you're stuck in the past." Jasmine's tone softens."Derek's not the same guy who left four years ago.Neither are you. You're both established in your careers now.Maybe instead of assuming you know how this ends, you give it a real shot?"

"But what if-"

"What if it works out? What if you both finally figure out how to blend your dreams instead of choosing between them?What if my idiot brother finally realized that all his success means nothing without you to share it with?"

I glance at the empty side of the bed, remembering how right it felt having Derek there."You really think we could make it work?"

"I think you're both too stubborn to try unless you let go of old hurts." She sighs."Live in the moment, Danny. The future will work itself out if you let it."

"When did you get so wise?"

"Please, I've always been the smart one in this family.It's not hard when your competition is Derek and Brandon.You've met my brothers."

I actually laugh at that. "Thanks, Jas.I needed this."

After hanging up, I head to the bathroom to freshen up.The woman in the mirror has her cheeks flushed, eyes bright, and her lips slightly swollen from Derek's kisses.I lean closer, examining this version of myself.

"We're not the same people we were," I tell my reflection as I brush my teeth."He's grown. You've grown. Maybe Jasmine's right.Maybe we can find a middle ground."

The pep talk works. By the time I finish showering, hope blooms in mychest.We're both more established now, more secure in ourcareers.Maybe we can blend our worlds instead of choosing betweenthem.

The kitchen is empty when I enter, no Derek insight.But his voice carries from the guest room, sharp andheated.

"I don't care about the merger timeline." Apause."No, I need to check the next availableflight.This deal can't wait... Yes, I understand the importance of... Look, just handle it until I getthere."

My heart plummets to mystomach.One night. That's all it took for him to start runningagain.All my hopes, all Jasmine's reassurances, shatter likeglass.

The coffee pot sits half full, bacon growing cold on a plate besideit.He didn't even bother telling me he wasleaving.Just like lasttime.

Tears burn my eyes as I back away from thekitchen.Scout senses the change in my mood and whines as I sink onto my bed. He presses against my legs, but all I can focus on is the sudden, crushing weight in mychest.

Some things never change.

And I'm a fool for thinking theycould.