Peacocks (Licking Thicket #5)

Chapter 3

Chapter Three

Lane

Jay’s words lingered in the air between us.

It still smells like you.

No human could be this sweet. Not without a reason. Not without a… a motive.

But my brain immediately called up a million examples of how he could be—how he was —and played them for me like one of those cheesy but adorable movie montages.

Last summer, when I’d planned to spend a whole afternoon relaxing in the backyard, I’d gotten derailed by some pictures on Chad’s Instagram and had instead spent hours hate-scrolling his honeymoon pictures, wondering what the hell was wrong with me. I hadn’t realized I’d said the words out loud until suddenly, Jay was beside me with a giant pair of clippers, asking for my help while he trimmed back the sickly crepe myrtle behind the garage.

“This little tree’s a tricky one,” he’d said as he’d worked. “If left to its own devices, it’ll tangle itself up until it blocks out its own sunlight.” He’d shot me a sideways glance. “But there’s nothing wrong with it that a little pruning won’t fix.”

By the time we’d finished gardening—which had taken a lot longer than necessary since Jay had “accidentally” squirted me with the hose during cleanup—I’d forgotten all about Chad.

Another time last fall, after I’d spent a full day and night at the clinic trying to save the life of Maisy Topher’s seventeen-year-old German shepherd, Claude—“ He’s my best friend, Doc Lane. Please.”— I’d arrived home shortly after sunrise to find Jay sitting on my steps holding a takeout container of triple chocolate cake from Annie’s Bakery.

He’d chattered at me for a while—some story about them giving away the cake on a two-for-one special, so it would have been wrong not to take both pieces but also wrong to eat both pieces, and would I mind solving this ethical dilemma for him?—while I’d sat silently beside him on the steps, shoving cake into my mouth and feeling a little less bone-weary.

Then, a month or so ago, Jay had stopped by the clinic to warn me there was a snowstorm coming and not to work too late. I remembered he’d been dressed up—black slacks and a crisp white button-down shirt, topped with a brown dress coat instead of his usual blue parka.

“Why you so fancy today, Jaybird?” Alva had asked.

He’d frowned. “Mrs. Herring needed a ride to the funeral home. I didn’t expect they’d appreciate my showing up in blue jeans.”

“I’m sorry,” I’d murmured, not knowing who Mrs. Herring was or who she’d lost.

He’d snorted lightly. “Don’t be. Mr. Herring was awful. She’s better off without him, to be honest. We all are.”

Alva had nodded firmly but silently, making the entire situation extremely awkward.

“Well, uh… thanks for the warning about the snow. I do have a couple of late appointments, but I’ll be careful.”

Jay’s lips had turned down in a scowl. “Surely you can cancel them. Your vehicle doesn’t have winter tires.”

In the end, I’d somehow been left with Jay’s four-wheel-drive truck, his dress coat, and a dozen hot chicken tenders in a brown paper bag. I remembered staring at the door for a full minute after the coatless man had absconded with my vehicle and left me with a warm meal.

Alva had let out a breath before heading back to the lab. “You’ve been Jaybirded, yes you have.”

Despite all the experience I’d had with the man up to that point, I still hadn’t understood what she’d meant. I’d expected Jay to be put out or annoyed. At the very least, for him to act like I’d owed him a favor.

He hadn’t.

He’d greeted me with a relieved “Howdy, neighbor” when I’d returned home that day, exchanged keys with no fuss, and ushered me up the freshly swept steps to my apartment with a friendly “Keep warm!” He’d never referred to the incident again.

I looked at Jay now, red-lipped and handsome as always. Only this time, he was red-lipped from kissing me, and his handsome was exponentially more compelling since I’d tasted the man’s mouth.

What was I supposed to be doing ?

Oh, right. Kissing him for each of his evil, evil deeds.

Except now, finally , I was starting to think I understood him.

“You’re obsessed with looking out for people,” I murmured before leaning in to give him the kiss I’d promised.

“I guess, a little.” His arms came around me again, and the feel of his big, strong hands firm against my back made me groan. “One person in particular, though…”

My heart pounded. “Why me?” I whispered.

Jay’s face was serious. “You’re in high need, Dr. Lane. I’ve never met a man who needed taking care of the way you do.”

The laugh spilled out of me. “I do not. I’ll have you know I managed to survive many, many years without the help of Jaybird Proud.”

“Survived,” he repeated like he was considering the word. “I guess so.” Jay’s hand came up to stroke my jaw with his thumb. The expression on his face could only be described as fond … and I was pretty sure I was looking at him the same way.

In addition to making me feel cared for, this man made me feel noticed and seen. He always had, though I’d been too busy trying to puzzle out his motives to realize it until that moment.

To be honest, it was a little overwhelming.

If Jay really saw me, did he see all the same flaws Chad had seen? Did he realize he’d been displaying his feathers, so to speak, for a man given to “emotional evasion,” who was “indifferent” toward relationships? Did he recognize what a bad bet I was?

In that moment, with my heartbeat thudding in my temples and my belly tight with want, I reminded myself that nobody had said a word about relationships. I could see in his eyes that Jaybird Proud wanted me, and the man was too sexy to ignore.

Not to mention, I hadn’t gotten laid in a very, very long time.

“Here’s another evil deed for you, Lane. I used bottled Italian seasoning tonight because I ran out of fresh basil.”

“No!” I gasped, recoiling back in mock horror. “I’ve been defrauded of my authentic Italian Gentleman experience! I’ve been cheated. I demand my money back! Oh… wait.”

He smirked. “Not only that, but remember that time I needed you to spot me on the ladder because I was feeling wobbly?”

I remembered holding his hips from behind while he reached to replace a lightbulb in the floodlight on the corner of the garage. The feel of his body heat through his jeans and the sight of his stellar ass cheeks right in front of my face meant not only did I remember, but I’d also imagined many, many other endings to that simple task.

Jay must have seen the heat in my eyes because his smile got wider. “I wasn’t wobbly. Well, if I was, it was because you were so damned close and looked hot as fuck in your doctor’s coat. I just wanted you closer.”

I leaned in to tease his lips with mine. “You are evil. Imagine taking advantage of an unsuspecting neighbor in such a way. For shame, Jay. For shame .”

This time, the kiss started off playful but soon intensified.

Jay was more aggressive than I’d known he could be, and it was hot as hell. Despite his adorable, insecure bumbling around me, when he put his hands on me, he was plenty confident. And because he was bigger and stronger than I was, his physical confidence made me harder than ever. I imagined him manhandling me in bed, moving me where he wanted me, and then pounding me into the nearest surface with all that brute strength.

Chad had been meticulous about keeping trim, to the point he sometimes seemed like a carefully curated collection of bones. But Jay? He was muscular and fit from working with his body all day, every day. He was not afraid of a carb, soft drinks, or dairy products. In fact, I’d once seen him make himself sick on cotton candy after buying a cotton candy machine to use at one of the town festivals. “Gotta test it out before giving any to the kids, Lane,” he’d said with a bright pink grin.

“Come upstairs with me,” I said now, pulling away after the peacock cried his displeasure once again.

Jay’s hands had made their way down to my ass, and now they cupped it possessively. “I don’t want to take my hands off you.”

I met his eyes. “Okay, but I was planning on getting naked upstairs.”

Jay grabbed my hand, shut off all but one low light in the garage, and yanked me up the stairs to my place. I had half a second to wonder where the sweet, sometimes reserved man I’d come to know had been hiding this take-charge side of himself… and then we were upstairs, and he was looking at me with unbridled heat in his eyes, and I decided I was very on board with Jaybird having hidden depths.

“Clothes off,” he grunted as soon as my apartment door was closed behind us.

“I didn’t even know you were gay until today,” I said, yanking off the hoodie and tee and tossing them both on the nearby love seat.

The look on his face was comical as he hopped around, toeing off his boots. “Lane,” he admonished. “How could you not know? I’ve undressed you with my eyes every day for six months.”

Knowing he’d been admiring my body for that long made my face flush. Suddenly, all those “neighborly” things he’d been doing for me took on a different meaning. I didn’t want to admit that I’d been too distracted by his sleeveless shirts and football knowledge to come to what should have been a very logical conclusion, though, so I blurted, “Why didn’t you say something?”

“Say what? ‘I won’t charge you rent, but I do want to fuck you’? Pretty sure that’s illegal, baby, even in Tennessee.”

I moved over to help him with the button and zipper on his jeans. “You could have found a middle ground. Maybe complimented me on my hair or something.”

Jay’s confusion was clear. “Lane. The first day I met you, I said you were hot as fuck.”

The memory of that day was hazy, mostly because we’d been pouring sweat from dragging my shit up the stairs on a day when the heat was sweltering. “I thought you said it was hot as fuck! The weather. Jesus.”

“Yeah, well, that too. And you don’t pack light, no offense.” He pulled off his T-shirt and dropped it on the floor, exposing his nipples to the cool air.

I ran my hands up his torso, the dark hair rough against my fingertips, until I could feel his hardening nipples. His stomach muscles contracted as he sucked in a breath. “I couldn’t believe you volunteered to help me unload the truck.”

Jay’s hands moved down to yank at the drawstring of my lounge pants. I wasn’t wearing any underwear, so when he tugged on the front, he got an eyeful down the front of them. “Can we stop talking now? My brain is making Disco Dave noises.”

He stepped closer and pushed my lounge pants down, eying my cock hungrily the entire time. As the pants fell to the ground, so did Jay.

When his knees hit the carpet, he grasped my shaft and glanced up at me. “Okay?”

I nodded as the sound of my jagged breathing seemed to fill the room. My fingers sifted through his untamed hair as his gaze moved down to my erection.

“Want this so fucking much,” he murmured, almost to himself.

I tried not to wonder who else he’d done this with here in town. Had he ever hooked up with his friend Hunter? Or Dunn Johnson? Or Diesel? The town was full of beautiful gay men, and the thought of any of them with Jay made my stomach ache.

As soon as his hot tongue wrapped around the head of my cock, though, my jealous imaginings popped like a thin bubble floating past a porcupine.

“Fuck,” I groaned.

Jay’s big hands clutched my hips and moved around to grab my ass. As he teased me with his mouth, he grinned up at me. “You have a killer ass. Always wanted to touch it. And, uh… stuff.”

I ran a thumb across his wet lips. “And stuff? Jaybird Proud, are you saying you want to fuck me?”

His smile dropped, and his eyes heated. “More than anything.”

As his mouth covered my cock again, I wondered what it would feel like to be pounded into the mattress by this sexy sweetheart. He might be strong and confident in some ways, but he was still so incredibly eager to please.

“Oh fuck,” I gasped as the tip of his tongue pressed against just the right spot. My hands tightened in his hair. “Just like that.”

He cupped my sac and ran a strong finger behind it, pressing against my taint and watching my eyes for my reaction. Since my brain was still swimming in the notion of being fucked by the man, his fingers and mouth had an easy job of it. Within moments, I felt like I was on the knife’s edge of coming.

“Bed,” I cried, grasping my last rational thought. “Want to suck you too.”

“You don’t have to,” he said hoarsely. “This time can just be about you.”

The man was so selfless, even in this. But I wanted to give him pleasure as much as I wanted to take it.

“Jay,” I said more insistently. “Bed. Now.”

We scrambled up onto my bed, ditching the last of our clothes until we were a tangled mass of body parts. Jay’s head was quickly buried between my thighs while I got my first glimpse of his fat cock.

I breathed out a curse and brought the tip to my lips to kiss it and bathe it with my lips and tongue. The deep sound Jay made in response caused my balls to tighten. His hands moved all over me as we sucked each other off, and just as I was ready to shoot, one of his fingertips ghosted over my hole.

“Fuck,” I cried, pulling off his cock and jacking him erratically as my orgasm hit. I arched into his mouth and felt his fingers clutch at my ass as he swallowed me down. As soon as I could, I put my mouth back on him to bring him the kind of pleasure he’d given me.

When his orgasm hit, he shouted and turned his face into my inner thigh, kissing it and moaning into my skin as his release landed hot and salty on my tongue.

I swallowed quickly and cleaned him up with my tongue before pulling away and leaning back on the bed to catch my breath.

It took me a minute to notice the tiny kitten-like kisses he continued to press into the tender skin of my inner thigh. It was so fucking sweet, something not many men had ever done to me before.

I moved around until I lay half on top of him so I could kiss his mouth again.

Jay was an incredible kisser, attentive and considerate. We kissed lazily for a long time, legs pretzeled together and spent cocks slack against each other’s damp skin. Jay’s hands moved reverently over my back and ass, partway down the back of my thighs, and up into my hair, as if he wanted to touch as much of me as he could. “So gorgeous,” he murmured against my skin. “So hot.”

I shivered at the sensation, and my cock tried to rally.

Had anyone ever been so focused on me after sex? I didn’t think so. I sure as hell hadn’t enjoyed it this much.

This was the part of hookups that so often turned awkward, in my experience. I wanted nothing more than to lie there in the afterglow, to soak up all of those kisses and touches, but I was pretty sure I was supposed to do something to wrap it up, to confirm it was just a hookup and definitely nothing serious. After all, Jay was such a considerate person he was likely to stick around to keep from hurting my feelings, and I didn’t want him to feel obligated.

Jay must have felt some change in my body, a tensing of my muscles as I prepared to disengage.

“I’m not leaving,” he murmured against my mouth.

“Oh.” I blinked. Was he a mind reader? “Good,” I heard myself say, surprised to find I meant it.

He pulled back and met my eyes. “I know you don’t want anything serious, but I…” He swallowed. “I want to sleep here with you tonight. It doesn’t have to mean anything.”

I didn’t know exactly what I wanted , but I was pretty sure I knew what was possible . Nothing had changed in the last hour, after all. I was still shitty at relationships at the best of times, and Jay and I were still incredibly different people. But I couldn’t help asking, “What makes you think I don’t want anything serious?”

Jay’s eyebrows winged up. “Do you?”

“N-no!” I shook my head fervently. “God, no. Nope. Noooo. I mean, I just got out of a relationship. Er, well, a year ago. Six months before I moved here. And it ended badly. Chad didn’t… I wasn’t…” I took a deep breath and let it out. “So… no.”

His eyebrows settled. “Right. So. It’s just… casual… whatever. Yeah?”

Logically, I knew he was correct, so even though something about his words felt wrong—jarringly wrong—I ignored it. I forced myself to say, “Yeah. Good. Casual.”

He leaned in to kiss me again. I lost myself in the overwhelming feel of him, the intoxicating press of his strong body against mine. The warmth of his skin and the sounds of his enjoyment.

We kissed for what seemed like hours, eventually stroking each other off when the intensity ratcheted up. After cleaning up the mess, we fell against each other again to catch our breaths.

And when the morning came, I expected things to get very awkward very quickly.

Except… they didn’t.

Jay appeared at my bedside in his underwear and holding two mugs of coffee. “Scooch over. It’s cold as balls out here.”

I moved over without thinking and felt the icy draft he brought with him as he returned to the warmth of the bed. As I took the hot mug from him, he settled against the headboard. “Okay, tell me what the peacocks need, and I’ll get it fixed up for them. You said something about a roost, right?”

“Yes. You’re really sweet,” I said softly. “Not a lot of people would care so much.”

Jay shrugged like he was uncomfortable with the praise. “I like taking care of things, like you said. I don’t always know the best way to do it, but I’m a quick learner. And what’s so wrong with wanting to make people… or, like, peacocks, I guess… happy, when it makes me happy too?”

“Not a single thing.”

He looked at me for a moment like he was trying to decide if I was being sincere or just telling him what he wanted to hear. Then, his face split in a wide grin. “Good. ’Cause I might not have set out to acquire a flock of peacocks, but they’re mine now. And I take care of what’s mine.”

I sucked in a breath. What would it be like to be his? I couldn’t help wondering.

But then I stopped myself. There was no use wondering about impossible things.

We spent the next half hour discussing proper peacock habitats, the fifteen minutes after that sucking each other off in a shared shower, and then separated to go back to our real lives.

Except it wasn’t quite that easy. Even when I was supposed to be concentrating on my work, I kept remembering how it had felt to be touched by Jay, adored by him. I already knew what it felt like to have him care for me in a “neighborly” way, but having him in my bed was an entirely different thing. The orgasm had been phenomenal, but the way he’d focused on me afterward and insisted on staying with me was?—

“But those anal glands are all yours.”

“Huh?” I snapped my head up to see Pete Winchell, our vet tech, glaring at me.

“Are you even here today, Doc Lane? Because I said your name, like, ten times and then had to threaten you with an impacted anal gland to get you to pay attention.”

I rubbed my eyes and glanced down at the exam table. Buttercup’s gaze was reproachful.

“Sorry,” I said, aiming my apology to both Pete and the dog. “I was daydreaming, I guess. My bad.”

“Uh-huh.” Pete raised one eyebrow. “So who’s the guy? Is he hot? And does he have a twin brother, close single friend, or heartbroken ex in need of a shoulder to cry on?” He wiggled his eyebrows meaningfully. “’Cause I’ve got sturdy shoulders, and I wanna say I’m not that desperate, but… I might be that desperate.”

I felt my face go hot. “I said nothing about a… anyone. I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“No?” Pete pursed his lips. “If that’s the story you wanna go with, okaaaay… I’ll just have to tell everyone I caught you smiling goofily and daydreaming about expressing Buttercup’s glands.”

I shot him an exasperated look. “You don’t have to tell anyone anything at all since it’s none of their business.”

He gave me a pitying smile. “That’s not how it works in the Thicket, Doc. Everybody here knows everybody else. And that’s a wonderful thing because it means everyone looks out for each other and really cares. But even a CIA agent couldn’t keep a secret here.”

Buttercup the dog let out a sigh that echoed my own.

I shook it off and managed to focus—or, more accurately, tried to fake it and failed—for the rest of the day.

When it was finally time to go home, I decided to stop by the new noodle restaurant in town, Hot Noods, and pick up dinner for Jay to pay him back for the pasta.

When I pulled into the driveway, I saw a pair of sawhorses set up by the garage with several two-by-fours on them. Next to the lumber was a chop saw and a haphazard pile of tools. It was clear Jay had moved the peacocks out into the backyard, as we’d discussed, and that he was working on their habitat, even though it was mostly dark and pretty cold out.

As I got out of the car, grabbing the takeout bag, Jay stepped into the open door of the garage and peered out. He reached up, bracing his hands on the overhang of the garage in a way that seemed deliberately designed to make the biceps popping out of his sleeveless shirt ripple and a mouthwatering slice of abs appear above the waistband of his jeans. He gave me a deliberate up-down look that made my mouth water and my cock plump behind my scrub pants.

“Well. Howdy, neighbor,” he said, injecting his voice with more of a sleepy drawl than usual.

I sucked in a breath and nearly choked on my own spit.

“H-hi,” I said, then scowled at my own ridiculousness.

I was a thirty-mumble-year-old man who’d had sex with many people. Like, many. There was no reason for me to feel like a middle schooler with his first crush just because Jaybird and I had hooked up.

We’d said casual, for God’s sake.

I cleared my throat. “I, uh… picked up some noodles. For… dinner?” I lifted the bag slightly.

Jay’s gaze dropped to the bag, and his forehead creased. “Oh.” His arms dropped, and he nodded. “Sure. Yeah. I won’t hold you up. Their wontons are the best, but you can’t eat ’em cold.”

I blinked. “No, Jay, I meant I got noodles for both of us. In case you wanted to, you know… come up and eat with me?”

My breathy voice managed to turn the simple invitation into the world’s silliest innuendo.

Smooth, Lane. Stop talking.

But the way Jay stared at me, still frowning, made me think maybe I needed to talk even more.

“I just… I thought… I can’t cook for shit, but I know you love their stuff, and I wanted to do something nice for you, so…” I pressed my lips together, stopping my babble.

For a person trying to keep things casual, I was sounding the exact opposite, damn it.

“You got me dinner?” Jay said, sounding as thrilled and befuddled as if I’d offered him a billion dollars, tax-free.

Now, it was my turn to look confused. “Well, yeah. You’ve been feeding me for, like, six months,” I teased. “It’s about time, right?”

Jay grinned and walked toward me slowly like I was an animal he didn’t want to startle. He didn’t seem to realize that I was more likely to sprout wings and fly than I was to walk away when he was looking at me with heat and appreciation in his eyes.

He took the bag from my hand, and slowly, leaving me plenty of time to move away, he pressed a soft kiss to my lips. “Thanks, Lane. And… just so I understand… will there be a dessert component to dinner?”

“Yeah.” I started to say there were cookies in the bag when I realized that “dessert” actually was an innuendo.

Jesus.

I immediately shut my mouth and flushed hot all over. “I mean, yes. I… I had a lot of fun last night. There’s no reason we can’t do that again, right? Casually, I mean?”

“Casually,” he repeated. He stepped closer so that our chests were pressed together, dipped his face to my neck, inhaled deeply, and groaned. “Fuck, you smell good. Can we eat dessert first?”

I couldn’t imagine how that was true, given the day I’d had, but I didn’t argue. Instead, I grabbed his hand and towed him, laughing, up the stairs to my apartment.

Two nights in a row didn’t make a casual thing not-casual, I told myself firmly. It was simply enjoying a thing while it lasted.

A sentiment I repeated to myself for the next couple of months.