Phoenix’s Fire (The Ruins Of Men #2)

Chapter 9

Nine

Ayla

I barely slept that night. After my talk with the guys, I kept thinking about Meri. Sure, she'd told me how she'd lied to get out, but there were so many gaps in the story. I knew she'd just explained the parts she thought were most important, but it was all important.

My mind refused to stop spinning, and when I finally did find sleep, it wasn't the restful kind. My dreams were filled with life in the compound, but the horrific kind. Meri and I were back, dragged in by the hunters, and Callah was being blamed for our escape.

When I woke, I felt more exhausted than when I'd lain down, but opening my eyes to see my own room made it better. The walls had been painted the same color as the sky. My bedding was blindingly white, as were the sheer curtains over the windows. And through that gauzy fabric, I could see clouds drifting over Lorsa. Big ones, with plenty of bright blue sky in between.

I lay there for a moment, enjoying the space these men had made for me. I had so much room, and I was allowed to do anything with it I wanted. I could keep it clean like we girls had in the compound. I could leave it messy, dropping my used clothing on the floor until it piled up if I chose. No one would yell at me for any of it, but I didn't want to mess up my nice things. That was why I picked the cleaner option.

When I finally got up, I pulled on a light dress and headed down for breakfast. From the sounds on the first floor, the guys were already awake. Still, I was a bit shocked to find Rymar sitting at the table writing on a piece of paper.

"Hey," he said as I pulled out the cold tea, "how do you spell Meri's name?"

"M-E-R-I-E-N-N-E," I told him. "Why?"

He tapped the page. "Her official status as a refugee requires this paper to be filed with the city. "

"I didn't do that," I said, making my way over to look at it.

"Zasen did it for you," he explained. "And I'm putting Jeera as her host, but you're her emergency contact. Is that okay?"

"I don't know what that is," I admitted.

"The person who's notified if something happens." He pushed the paper toward me so I could see it better. "If she's injured in an attack, a messenger will be sent to let you know."

"Oh. Yes, that would be good."

He nodded and started writing again. "She's going to eventually need to pick a sign, but she has time to think about that." He filled out another line. "But this makes her officially a resident of Lorsa."

"So she can come visit me when she wants?" I asked.

"Exactly," Rymar assured me. "That's why I want to make sure all the official crap is done."

Which was when Zasen sauntered into the kitchen, clearly having heard most of that. "We need to talk about her, Ayla." He kept going to the counter, then filled both the glass I'd left out and one for him.

"I said I'd talk to her," I insisted.

"I know," Zasen promised as he carried both glasses back to the table, passing me one. "Sit."

Okay, this felt serious. We usually drank morning tea in the living room. The table was for evening meals. Not that it couldn't be used for other things, as Rymar was currently proving, but a talk? Here? Like this? Had something already gone wrong?

I pulled out my normal chair and sat. Zasen took the one between me and Rymar. First, he lifted the glass and took a big drink, but when he set it down, Zasen's eyes turned to me.

"Meri isn't immune to Dragon venom," he said. "I'm not sure she even knows we're venomous, or if that would scare her more. Ayla, this means I will need to make sure Jeera has enough meat that is killed cleanly."

"I can help," I offered.

He just lifted a hand. "I've already planned on that, and I'm not trying to make you feel guilty or like you aren't doing enough."

"Then you started wrong," Rymar said, his eyes still on the page. "Ayla, what he's trying to say is he's helping to take care of your friend too. He just isn't sure what she'll need."

"And that she's your friend," Zasen quickly clarified. "You know Meri the best. You know what she'll be able to handle, and I know we didn't do very well with you."

"But you did," I insisted. "You made me feel safe, and you fed me, and even when I tried to run away, you made sure I didn't. You weren't even mad when I slapped you!"

"No, because you were scared," he agreed. "Scared enough to run towards the forest, which could've killed you. But that's the thing. What are the chances Meri would do the same?"

I paused, realizing what he was getting at. I'd been up here long enough to get used to everything about the Dragons. I no longer saw them as strange, and the men didn't scare me the way they used to. No, I didn't know all the rules or polite ways to behave, but I also believed Rymar, Zasen, and Kanik would make sure I didn't mess up too badly.

I'd learned to trust them. They'd learned to trust me. Meri didn't have that yet. She barely knew Jeera or Brielle, and everything she'd been told about the surface was a lie. What she thought was true was more likely to get her hurt than the reality.

While I was thinking about that, Kanik made his way in, but he paused at the archway separating the kitchen from the living room. "This looks serious," he muttered.

"Not too bad," Zasen promised. "Just figuring out what to do with Meri."

"Thought we'd decided that last night." He started walking again, clearly going to get his own tea. "Rymar?" he offered.

"Yes, thank you," Rymar said. "At least someone is willing to pour a glass for me."

"I was going to," I insisted.

He looked up and smiled at me. "I know, but Zasen didn't."

"Asshole," Zasen teased.

"So, have you asked Ayla what she wants to do?" Kanik asked as he came over to claim the last chair.

"I hadn't yet," Zasen said, looking over at me.

"What?" I asked. "What do you mean? Do what?"

"For a job," Kanik clarified. "Or even for a life. A purpose, I suppose. You've said you don't want to be a wife, and you don't want to have children, so housewife and mother are out. But what do you want to do, Ayla?"

"I..." I looked between the three men.

My entire body felt like it had paused. The question was too big! I'd left the compound because I'd wanted more. I'd longed for a purpose, but getting here had changed that. There were so many new things to learn - never mind stopping the Moles!

But Kanik was right. Everyone else had jobs. They had dreams much bigger than simply reading books. And now these men were implying I could do the same? It was so mind blowing that I didn't know how to answer.

For my entire life, I'd been taught women helped their husbands. They bore children. Our purpose was to care for our families. Nothing more and nothing less.

Kanik had just made it clear I no longer had those limits, and my mind immediately spiraled. So many options and possibilities whirled through my thoughts, but they were going too fast to grab any.

So instead, I asked. "What can I do? "

"Anything you want," Zasen assured me. "You're already helping with the city defenses. I can officially list you on the rolls for that, which will earn you a stipend."

"No," Rymar said. "I mean, yes. List her. She deserves to get paid for helping, but she doesn't need a job." He looked over at me. "Ayla, if you want to care for the house, you can. If you want to sew clothes, or learn to be a nurse, you can."

"Or a doctor," Zasen added, just a little too casually.

"But!" Rymar said, taking over again, "you don't need to worry about a job if you don't want to."

"Then how's she going to pay for things?" Kanik asked.

The look Rymar gave Kanik was weary. "We're fine, Kanik. Money isn't a problem. I don't care if she, or you, or Zasen earns enough. That's what I've been trying to tell you. We're fine. The cafe earns more than enough for everyone in this house. We're completely fine, so she doesn't need to work if she doesn't want to."

"But everyone else works," I realized. "Kanik said having a job was doing help in exchange for payment, right?"

"It is," Rymar agreed. "I also think you should be able to have a job you want, not one you need because you're worried about paying bills."

"I don't know what that means," I admitted.

"Good," Rymar said. "And Kanik, the same goes for you. Stop worrying about money. I've got you."

"I just - "

Rymar groaned, cutting him off. "You're a young teacher. You have debts from your education. You love what you do, so you should keep doing it. The cafe is doing well, and the two of you helped me get that off the ground, so let it help you back, okay? Help goes both ways, Kanik. You were there for me, and all I'm trying to do is repay the favor!"

Zasen leaned closer to me. "For most people, earning money is a sign of success. It shouldn't be, because while money lets you buy things, many people sacrifice their happiness in order to get it. The three of us have been lucky because we've always helped each other get into what we want to do. Now, it's our turn to help you."

"Oh." I nodded, thinking about that.

But Kanik wasn't willing to let Rymar have the last word. "Look, I'm not trying to take advantage of your generosity."

"You're not!" Rymar insisted. "You've only been out of school four years. As a teacher, you're still starting out. Is your contract with the school even permanent?"

"Will be after this year," Kanik muttered.

"And then you'll make better wages," Rymar said. "I'm just trying to help."

I almost kept my mouth shut, but from the looks on the men's faces, I realized they weren't quite hearing each other. Clearly, this was an old debate between them, but neither one had said the important thing yet, so I decided to help.

"Rymar, Kanik doesn't want you to think he expects you to always help. He doesn't want to take advantage of you." Then I turned to Kanik. "Rymar's just trying to say he doesn't mind. He doesn't think you're taking advantage of him. I'm guessing Rymar has a lot of this money stuff, and you don't?"

"Yeah, basically," Kanik admitted.

"And when you don't have something," I said, "it makes you want it more. When you have a lot of it, you want to share that good with the people you care about. Rymar clearly cares about you. Kanik, you're his friend! He's saying you matter more than the money thing."

Beside me, Zasen folded his arms across his chest and leaned back. Across from me, Rymar looked up, his mouth hanging open in surprise. On my other side, Kanik was nodding his head slowly.

"I'm sorry, Ry," he said. "I just..."

"No, I get it," Rymar assured him. "I mean, I know I complain about people only liking me for my money, but it should be our money. That's all I'm saying. You were my friend before we had it."

"I'll share my money too, when I get it," I offered. "I'm sure I owe all of you a lot of it."

"Mm," Zasen mumbled, "but we want to share with you as well, Ayla, because you're our friend."

"Then maybe we should just put it all together?" I asked. "Or is that a stupid thing?"

This time, Zasen was the one with the shock on his face. "Um, it's normally something people don't want to do. You know, in case they stop being friends for some reason."

"But I don't want to stop being your friend," I told them. "All three of you have been so kind, and you've even saved my life!"

"Does put a whole new light on it," Rymar said. "She also has a good point." He looked at Kanik, then over to Zasen. "We need a house fund."

"I'll get a canister for the living room," Zasen decided. "House money goes in there. Food, clothing, and necessities. Deal? We all put in what we can, and if we need to use it, it's there for anyone."

"Sounds good to me," Rymar said. "Also means Ayla will have access to it if she wants to get Meri some things. And when you earn money, Ayla, you keep some for yourself and only share the extra, okay? Same for all of us."

"Okay," I agreed. "Because we all have highs at different times. That means we can carry our friends during their lows, right? I mean, that's how Meri, Callah, and I did it when we were growing up."

"And I think you girls had a great idea," Rymar assured me.

Kanik reached over and gently touched my arm. "So what do you want to do with the rest of your life? What do you want to specialize in, Ayla?"

I glanced at Zasen, then back to Kanik. "I want to stop the Moles."

"And?" he pressed.

I blinked, unable to come up with anything else. "I don't know."

"Do you want to make clothes?" Zasen offered. "Or learn to dance? Sing? Cook for others like Rymar's cafe does? Own a store or a stall like Jeera? Study to be a doctor?"

I shook my head at all of those. "I think what you do sounds the most interesting."

"Hunting?" Zasen asked, surprised.

I nodded. "Every time I go out, I learn more about the world. I can practice the bow while I do it, and because I don't have venom, I don't bring back meat tainted with it. Well, with normal arrows. That means I could help Jeera and Meri, right?"

"True," Zasen said. "And I do have a lot of orders. We can start with that, but you can learn other things too."

"I don't know what other things I might like yet," I admitted. "Everything is so new and amazing. But in the compound, I liked exploring, and the forest is a very big place to explore. I like killing Moles, so wouldn't hunting be the same?"

"Some people find it harder," Rymar told me. "I do. Killing someone who wants to hurt you is not the same as killing an animal to eat it. I can't do it."

"Oh." I nodded because that made a sort of sense. "But I don't mind that part. Hunting means going out into the world and seeing it. It means learning to use weapons so I can protect us, and feed us, and be strong like that. It also means learning the animals, and the plants, and the insects. I used to read about them, but I've never seen them!"

"That's actually a good point," Zasen relented.

So I decided to press my luck. "I also want to learn how to hit like you do, Zasen. You know, for when the Moles come back. I mean, I don't have a tail to sting, but you use the krael and hold them off, and I can't do that."

"I can teach you hand-to-hand," Kanik offered.

"And he'd be better at that part than I would," Zasen added. "Kanik is smaller than me, which means he'll move more like you will. Shorter arms and legs."

"But I don't have a tail," I said again.

"You don't need one," Kanik promised. "If you want, I can give you lessons on hand-to-hand combat and defense when I get home from school."

"School?" I asked. "But…"

He wasn't at school. I knew he was a teacher, but he hadn't been at school since I'd known him. I didn't even know when school was - either the days or the time.

Kanik ducked his head and chuckled. "Um, teachers get room assignments and have to have our lesson plans finalized this week. Next week, the kids start attending."

"Oh."

"Because summer's almost over," Zasen explained. "The weather will start cooling, and the building won't be too hot for the kids to sit in all day. He'll work from about eight in the morning until just after three in the afternoon."

"Probably closer to four," Kanik corrected. "I sometimes have to stay late with children for lessons or punishment."

I twitched at that. "You punish the children?"

Kanik lifted a hand. "It's called detention, and it means extra lessons or responsibilities. No hitting, kicking, or abusing. It's simply a way to teach the young ones that misbehaving isn't allowed while showing them that hard work is praised."

All I could do was nod. "Okay, I think that's one more thing I need to tell Meri." So I looked over at Zasen. "When can I go see her? And how am I going to find Jeera's house?"

"Noon," Zasen said.

My eyes jumped to the clock. The one that said it was only nine in the morning. "But that's three hours!"

"Why noon?" Rymar asked.

Zasen grunted softly, then answered Rymar first. "Jeera thought Meri would probably sleep in late. I can't remember if Ayla did, but she also couldn't talk to us, so she was on high alert. But my sister didn't want us there before noon so she and Brielle could get Meri situated, make sure she had underwear and all the important things - including a good meal."

"But…" I said again, ending on a huff. "What am I going to do for three whole hours?"

Kanik ducked his head as he tried to bite back a chuckle. "Well, I mean, I could give you a lesson in hand-to-hand defense. That should take at least an hour."

"Then a shower and changing clothes is probably one more," Rymar pointed out. "Plus, since I have to take all of this to City Hall right around noon, I can walk you over there."

I saw Zasen nod at Rymar, but I wasn't quite sure what that meant. Still, I wanted to see Meri. Mostly, I wanted to make sure she was okay, check up on her, and find out everything I'd missed while I'd been gone. It sounded like Callah was still okay, but I just had so many questions!

Learning how to fight like the men would definitely distract me. It was also something I needed to do. A part of me felt guilty about it, as if I should have Meri as my sole focus right now, but I couldn't. Zasen was right. The Moles would come back, and I needed to be ready for them too.

I still had to make sure Meri knew about them, and that was what had me so anxious about all of this. But if I couldn't see her right now anyway, then there was no reason I couldn't do both, right?

"Okay," I decided, looking over at Kanik. "If you don't mind, I would really like to learn how to hit like you do."

His lips curled and those dark purple eyes of his found mine. "Go put on some pants and I'll show you. We can have our first lesson as soon as you're ready."

"Okay!" I agreed, hopping up from my chair. "And you have everything you need for Meri's papers, Rymar?"

"I definitely do," he said. "And Ayla?"

"Hm?"

"Thanks," Rymar told me. "For making sure Kanik and I understood each other. It's the kind of thing a true friend does."

I felt the smile on my face growing bigger than it had before. "That's because you three are some of my best friends. Maybe even better than Meri and Callah."