Chapter 36
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
WELLS
I’m pulling up at the hockey arena for Carter’s game when my phone rings. “Hey, babe,” I say when the call connects through my speaker. I’ll never get tired of saying that.
“I was hoping to catch you before you went into the fire.” Kellan sounds out of breath.
“What you’re doing may be the more interesting question?” Just hearing him makes blood start pounding. I can’t get enough of him, and it’s been three days since I got to lay eyes on his beautiful body.
“Coop bet me that I couldn’t beat the bus from the dining hall back to our apartment.
It was leaving at the same time that we started walking back.
” I lift an eyebrow, even though he can’t see it.
“I know you’re making that face,” he says as I look around the parking lot, like I’m being watched.
He really does have my number. “But in my defense, I have a reputation as a fierce competitor to protect.”
“Sure,” I respond sarcastically. “And definitely taking the chance of smashing your face up on the sidewalk days before your final regular season game is a good decision.”
“I ran in the street. Had to make it fair for the bus.”
I laugh. “Of course you did. Smart, given the great absorption of concrete on the knees.” Now that Kellan’s life has evened out, I’m realizing that he’s just a big, playful kid.
And though I’m not sure what was causing it, specifically, Kellan told me that he and Coop had worked things out, which makes me happy.
I don’t want us being together to be the source of any stress in his life.
“Are you my boyfriend or my agent?”
“I’m whatever you need me to be, baby,” I flirt.
His tone drops lower when he says, “That’s my line,” and it sends a thrill through me.
“I’m glad you called.” My voice is more serious than I want it to be, but I can’t pretend like I haven’t been stressing all day about this. “I’m not looking forward to a few hours sitting next to my parents without Carter as a buffer.”
“It’s going to be okay,” Kellan soothes.
“You know the score, and you’re there for your brother.
And if your parents say anything shitty, you can leave.
At the very least, you can go sit somewhere else.
Just tell the security people that you know me.
I’m honestly shocked that I don’t have a dedicated seat in the stadium. ”
I appreciate that he’s trying to lighten the mood and lift my spirits, and I find myself going along with it. “The truth comes out. I’ve been playing the long game to gain access to the world of high school hockey. You’ve got me.”
“And college,” he bats back before adding, “pro too, if you’re lucky.”
We still haven’t talked about what Kellan going pro could mean for us, both in terms of distance and scrutiny toward our relationship.
But, he’s not acting pressed about it, so I’m trying to follow his lead.
“My dream. Endless cold stadiums and a nutrition regimen that will only grow harder as your metabolism starts betraying you.”
I appreciate the aghast sound he lets out. “I thought you were staunchly against body shaming.”
I think of Kellan, when he’s older and a little softer. When there’s graying on his temples and little crow’s feet at the edges of his eyes. And honestly, he’s only going to look better. There’s not a doubt in my mind. “You’re right. Whatever body you have is the perfect body,” I acquiesce.
“Damn straight,” he says, laughter bubbling up that makes my heart speed up.
“Thank you, Kellan.” It doesn’t encompass what I want to say to him, but I hope he understands how much having him in my life means to me. How he’s changed me in the best possible ways.
I can hear the smile in his voice when he answers me. “I’m not sure what you’re thanking me for, but you’re welcome.”
“Okay,” I groan, looking at the SUV’s dashboard clock, “I’ve got to go inside. The drop is in a few.”
“It’s hot when you use hockey terms.”
I laugh. “Okay, loverboy. I’ll never hear the end of it if I show up late.”
“Let me know how the game goes? I mean, not just the game, but the stuff with your parents. I want to hear about that, too.”
“I will,” I say as I hang up the call. Almost immediately, nervousness settles back in my body.
It’s a short walk to the arena, even with the throngs of people heading inside.
It doesn’t take me long to find my seat, mostly because I can see the top of my dad’s head, a sandy hair color that almost perfectly matches my own.
It’s like the opposite of a neon sign, and I immediately want to flee.
But I won’t. I told Carter that I’d come watch him play, and I’m going to stick it out.
I take the open seat next to my dad, at the end of the row. We’re close to center ice, near the boards. “Hey.”
It’s my mom who speaks first. I almost find it comforting that I’d hit the nail on the head. “Cutting it a little close, Bennett.”
“It’s mid-terms this week, and I had a tutoring appointment right before this.
” Which isn’t exactly a lie. I just prioritized taking Kellan’s call instead of walking in ten minutes earlier.
I’ve already explained to my parents about my tutoring at least half-a-dozen times over the years.
They don’t understand it. Or, more accurately, they don’t care to understand.
It doesn’t fit in with their ‘wealth building’ ideology, which means that they simply ignore its existence.
“It seems like such a waste of time,” my dad says from next to me. And yep, there it is. Right on schedule.
I decide to change the subject. I run my sweaty palms down my pants, which earns me a disapproving look from my mom. “Pretty exciting that if they win tonight, they’ll make it to state. I heard it’s been four years since that’s happened.”
My dad makes a non-committal sound. “If you’re going to play, the least you can do is win.”
God, this is even worse than I remember. “Right.”
I’m hoping that we can leave things here, now that we’ve had our perfunctory, obligatory smalltalk.
Apparently, Bennett Wellington II has other ideas.
“Playing sports builds character, but it’s not a career.
I cannot understand your brother’s insistence in continuing with hockey into college.
He would have still been accepted to Radford without it. ”
“I think that he likes it?” I say, even though I know he’s not looking for a response.
“If everyone followed their passions, the world would be full of lazy bums who smoke pot all day and live in shacks along the river.”
I do a double take. “As opposed to what?”
“Contributing to society, of course,” he says, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “Speaking of which, we haven’t discussed your post-graduation plans.”
Suddenly, I’m wishing that we were still talking about pot smoking bums living on the river, which is not a concept that I ever thought would exist in my head. “I didn’t know that you had an interest.”
“You’re still a Wellington. Your… proclivities aside,” is the word choice that he settles on.
I hate that his opinion matters to me, even as I ask, “So, what were the last six years about then? Making me prove that I could still be successful, even though I’m gay?”
My dad scoffs. “Successful? Come on, Bennett. We pay for your life. You spend your time tutoring students instead of letting them fail in the world like they’re supposed to.
And you haven’t come to me with a single plan as to your future, like you’re just waiting for me to figure it out for you.
” He gives me an exacting stare. “And luckily, I have.” He says something else, but I can’t hear him.
I don’t even realize that the game’s started until raucous cheers erupt around me. I raise my voice so that I can be heard. “What?”
“London. We opened an office there last year, and I’ve been less than pleased with the progress being reported. I need someone on-site. A Wellington, who’s going to keep them honest.”
I feel sick, as his words wash over me. “You want to send me to London to… spy on your own employees for you?” Every time I think my father’s gone to his most extreme, he proves me wrong.
“They’re your employees, too. I know that you went to Radford because it would please us. And while I can’t say I’m thrilled with how you’ve spent your time at school, you’re graduating with a 4.0 and a business degree. Even if you weren’t, I need someone that I can trust at the new office.”
I absorb what he’s telling me. My dad, saying that he trusts me.
That he needs me. For as much as I’ve pretended not to care, the way his words wash over me is making it clear that I’m not as emotionally separated as I want to be.
And even if I know that on some level, the goalpost is always going to be moving, it doesn’t stop the gratification that for once in my life, I may be getting the chance to play.
Still, I know that it’s a horrible idea. He’ll never let me be myself, for starters. And Kellan? We’d never make it across that big of a distance. I think, deep down, that he’d lose some respect for me, too. Hell, I’m losing it for myself just considering my dad’s proposition.
But, I also know that Bennett Wellington II isn’t someone that you just say no to. It’s not a word in his vocabulary. “I need some time to think about it.”
He sighs, like he’s bored. “It’s not an offer, Bennett. You’re going to London. It’s what’s expected of you, and that’s that.”
“And if I don’t?” There’s a lump in my throat that’s trying to choke me, and I barely manage to get the words out.
“This little half-in, half-out game that you’ve been playing will be over. You’ll be cut off, and we’ll put the issue of your commitment to the family to bed, once and for all.”
“What about being your son?”
“You’re my son because you’re a Wellington, and if you’re not a Wellington then… I think you can figure it out.” He watches the game instead of looking at me, his words exacting like a perfect stab to my heart.