Chapter 20
LORNA
FOUR WEEKS LATER
“ I picked up your favorite.” Nic dangles the brown paper bag in front of my face after he’s arrived home. Snatching it from his hand, I take a look inside.
“Thanks.” I try to smile when I see the double chocolate muffin, then place it to one side and continue to stare at the TV. It’s a sweet gesture but it’s not going to make me feel any better.
I’ve had the same channel on all day, and not paid any attention to the programs, instead I’ve thought about all the things I’ll never get to do with my father. I’ve thought about how he’ll never meet his grandchild, and how he won’t be there on my wedding day. That's if Nic still wants to marry me. I’ve been so low and miserable this past month, I wouldn’t blame the guy for changing his mind.
“Madalina wants us to go over to theirs on Sunday, she’s cooking up a feast.” Nic continues to try and spark some enthusiasm out of me, but his attempts fail. “Apparently, Serena’s bringing a gentleman frie?—”
“Where is he?” The question that's been going round and round in my head for weeks finally comes out.
“I don’t know, Madalina seems to think he’s from Queens but–”
“Not him, my father. You told Cass and the others to call your guy. You had him cleaned up like some kind of spillage in a grocery store aisle. Where did your guy take him, Nic?” My voice gets progressively louder and I can see that, after weeks of silence and weakness, Nic is surprised by my sudden outburst.
“I’m sorry it had to happen like that, but if the police had come and–”
“I get it, I understand. But...” I shrug. “I have nowhere to go where I can pay my respects or visit my dad.” I wish I could speak to him one last time. Let him know that he was wrong about Nic and that I’m safe, and cared for. I hope that somehow he’s watching and seeing how well Nic’s taken care of me the past few weeks.
“Lorna, that night, I just wanted to get you out of there, I didn’t kno— I still don’t know who shot him and I couldn’t risk the chance of you being a target too. I can speak to the guy and ask some questions if that's what you need,” he offers but I shake my head because I have a feeling I wouldn’t like the answers. I don’t know why I even bothered to ask. I’m sure men like Nic’s guy don’t look for peaceful, pretty burial spots. They dispose of bodies like trash.
“It’s fine.” I feel sick just thinking about where he could be and I decide to never let curiosity get the better of me again.
“It’s not fine, Lorna, you haven’t been sleeping, or eating properly. You need to start taking better care of yourself.” Nic goes to stroke my arm but I pull away.
“What's the matter, am I not being a good enough little incubator for you, right now?” I snap. I’ve spent four long weeks suppressing my feelings and now, I’m not just mad at Nic, I’m mad at the world.
“Lorna, don’t be like that,” he sighs, patiently. “You know that's not what I meant. I’m worried about you.”
“Well, I’m fine. Apart from the fact my daddy’s brains got blown out, right in front of me, I’m doing great!” I stand up and barge past him, heading for our room and slamming the door after me. I lie down on my bed, and when I feel our baby rolling around inside me without a care in the world, I suddenly feel overwhelmed by the cruel one I’m bringing it into.
“Lorna.” Nick sounds worried as he knocks on the door, and I close my eyes, trying to find some calm. Nic isn’t to blame for this, he’s been nothing but kind and understanding since it all happened, and I’ve taken all my hurt and anger out on him. We haven’t had sex since Malibu, and yet he’s slept beside me each night and held me while I cried. He’s comforted me through each one of my nightmares and I’m being so ungrateful.
“Come in,” I call out, hating the fact that he’s right. I do need to take better care of myself, our baby relies on it.
“I’m sorry if I made you feel that way.” Nic cautiously steps inside. “I know you're hurting and, believe me, I've been trying to get to the bottom of what happened.” He sits on the bed beside me.
“The baby’s getting stronger.” I look up at him and manage a smile. I don’t want to talk about my dad, anymore. I’m exhausted from the thoughts in my head and I need to focus on something good. “Do you want to feel?” Despite Nic sleeping beside me each night, he’s been respectful and given me space. I miss the way he used to touch me. I get the impression he’s missing it too.
“Of course, I do.” He smiles as I lift up my top and reveal my stomach. Even with my lack of appetite, it’s continued to grow, especially over the last two weeks.
“Here.” I place his hand where all the action seems to be, then lie back and close my eyes.
“Whoa…I just felt something!” he tells me after a few silent minutes. “Shit, Lorna. I felt it again. I felt it move!” I open my eyes and when I see how excited he looks, I can’t help but smile.
“I’ve felt it more today than ever, it can’t keep still in there,” I tell him, feeling his excitement spread through me.
“It’s incredible.” He shuffles down the mattress, placing a hand on both sides of my bump and waiting to feel it again. A tiny ripple travels from one side of my belly to the other and he looks up at me with wide, amazed eyes.
“Does that hurt?” he asks.
“Not right now, but ask me again when I’ve got a full-term baby shifting around in there.” I laugh for the first time in so long.
“You see how happy you're making your mamma?” Nic talks to my tummy before he kisses it and warms my entire body.
Suddenly, I'm very aware of how close his mouth is to my center, and I feel my insides start to pulse when I imagine his tongue licking and teasing me. I’ve been far too consumed with trauma and grief to think about anything like that…up until now.
“Nic,” I whisper his name. He looks up at me and when he sees the look on my face, he nods his head as if he knows what I want to say.
“I got you, baby.” He lowers his body some more, lifting one of my legs so his head can slide between them. “You just tell me what you need, okay?” His fingers make slow swirls through the fabric covering me, and he places a trail of kisses across my lower stomach. I can feel myself getting wetter and he smiles up at me when I moan for more.
“You like that? Do you want to feel my tongue, pretty girl?” he whispers against my skin, before circling my, now popped-out, tummy button with the tip of it. I’ve missed him touching me, and as much as I’ve appreciated him giving me space, now I realize that space from him isn’t what I’ve needed at all.
This is what I've needed.
“Is your pussy getting wet for me?” He slides his hand into the front of my shorts to find out and smirks when his fingers slicken with pleasure. “Are you going to let me take care of you? Give you what you need?”
I nod as his words bring me comfort. I love the way it feels to have Nic taking care of me. He’s had to put up with me being so short, distant, and sad that I’m surprised he wants to be anywhere near me and yet, once again, here he is, proving I can rely on him.
“Good girl.” He hooks his fingers into the waistline of my shorts and drags them down, exposing my bare pussy and looking up at me as he drips saliva from his mouth onto my sensitive flesh. I gasp when I feel it trickle through my center and grip the bed sheets while I wait with anticipation to feel his tongue there too. “Such a needy, little pussy. Mmmmm. Do you have any idea how hot you look, right now?” His voice is so low and gravelly, just the sound of it makes my nipples tighten.
“Glistening pussy, legs spread open, nice and wide so I can see it.” He pulls back so he can admire what's laid out in front of him. “This sexy-as-fuck tummy.” His hands frame my belly, holding it firm. “Do you know how hard it’s been not to touch you?” He wets his lips with his tongue, making me crave it, even more.
“ Please, ” I beg him, already starting to rut my hips.
“Baby, you know I love it when you beg.” He strokes me with his finger, softly, gently, and in that way that never fails to make me buckle.
“That’s nice, pretty girl. Really, fucking nice. You are going to come for me before I even touch you with my tongue.” I rest back on my elbows and watch his fingers do their work. It feels so exposing, and intimate, that I think he might be right. “You like to watch? Watch these fingers, baby. Watch them fuck you.”
He slips two of them inside me and I close my eyes and sigh with relief. “Open your eyes, princess. Tell me how it feels.” He’s taking such focus and attention into slipping them in and out of me, I wish I could describe it for him.
“It feels…” I swallow thickly, trying to catch my breath. “I can feel them stretching me.” It’s getting harder to form words.
“Do you want another one?” he asks, looking down at them and watching me stretch.
“Yes… please.” I bite my lip and nod my head, and when I feel him stretch me a little wider with a third finger, I throw my head back and look at the ceiling. “ Fuck! ”
“Good girl, you’re getting this bedsheet really fucking wet,” he tells me, pulling back his fingers out and raising them to my mouth. “Suck them clean, taste how much you like it when I fuck you with my fingers.” He slips them between my lips and I do as he says, sucking them hard and feeling my walls ache painfully from his absence. “Keep watching,” he tells me, lowering his head and slowly sliding his tongue from my entrance, through my folds.
Every inch of my skin shivers, and when he places his hands on the inside of my thighs to open them wider, I look down and watch as he licks, kisses, and nips me in all of the right places.
“That’s so fucking good,” I tell him, gripping his hair and pressing myself against his face like a needy whore. “This is what I needed, Nic,” I whisper, giving up completely on trying not to sound desperate. I feel more movement come from inside me and, knowing how much he loved it before, I take his hand and move it back to rest on my belly so he can feel it too. He stops what he’s doing and smiles as his eyes focus on his hand. “Do you know how fucking incredible you are?” He shakes his head. “You really have no fucking idea.”
“We both did this,” I remind him, feeling the smile on my face getting wider. Suddenly, I’m starting to remember all the things I’ve got to be happy about.
“I did the easy part, you’re the one who’s–”
“I wouldn’t call taking care of me easy,” I cut him off, and remind him to get back to it when I push his head back down.
I moan as he continues to use his tongue on me, and after I come for a second time, he slowly climbs up my body and slips out of his slacks.
“Are we okay doing it like this? You're a lot bigger now and I don’t… you know.” He grips my hips while he positions himself between my legs.
“I think we can manage for a few more weeks.” I smile up at him and stroke circles over my big, round belly. The fact it’s grown clearly pleases Nic and I’m feeling proud of it, myself.
“Fuck, you look so hot doing that.” Nic looks between our bodies and watches me. “I’m starting to think you like that cute, baby bump.” He kisses my neck and nips at my collarbone.
“It doesn’t feel cute, anymore. It’s starting to feel massive,” I tell him, sliding my hand a little lower so I can stroke my clit.
“Why does hearing you talk like that make me feel like I’ll come before I get inside you?” He takes his huge cock and rests it on my belly.
“Because you know you’re the cause of it. You put this baby in there. Do you like seeing what I’ve done with the seed you gave me?” I watch my words have an effect on him, and it makes me feel empowered. “You like watching me get bigger, because it shows I’m growing you a healthy, little heir.”
“Fuck,” he growls when I place my hand over his cock, making a tunnel with the arch of my hand so he can thrust against me.
“Seriously, if you carry on like that I’m going to spill all over this sexy belly,” he warns.
“I think you’d like that.” I continue to jack him off against my stomach as his hand grips the side of it firmly.
“Is that where you want it, all over this pretty belly I gave you?” I hear the excitement in his voice.
“Huh huh.” I nod my head.
“Ask for it. Ask me to come all over this belly I gave you.” He takes his cock in his fist and pumps it faster against me.
“I want your cum, Nic. All over this.” I rub a long, drawn-out circle around my bump that sends him over the edge.
“Fuck, Lorna, you’re killing me.” He looks down as he shoots his load all over my swollen stomach. His groan is deep and feral and he shocks the hell out of me by lifting my hips and thrusting inside me.
“Nic!” I gasp.
“You think that's all I’ve got? Not when it comes to you.” He slides his hand through his cum, massaging it into my skin as he fucks me with long, hard pumps.
“I don’t know how you did it, Lorna James, but I’m fucking obsessed with you. You’ve got me thinking about the next baby I’m going to fuck into you before you’re even done growing this one.” He keeps his eyes fixed intensely on mine. “I’ve hated not being close to you these past few weeks.” He thrusts inside me harder.
“You're crazy.” I laugh.
“I wasn’t before you. You’ve made me crazy. You, and this.” He looks down at my growing bump. “You're everything I never knew I needed, and now I feel like I can’t live without you.” Tears fill my eyes and suddenly he stops.
“Hey, hey…don’t get sad, again. I’m sorry. I’ve just felt so detached from you. I needed you to know how I felt.” His face is full of concern and it only makes me more emotional.
“I’m not sad, you idiot,” I snuffle. “I’m happy and I can’t believe it’s with you.” We both burst out laughing and when my tummy starts to move again, he strokes his hand over it and smiles.
“Let’s not look back, just forward. We have a really exciting future ahead of us. Who knows, you might even end up falling in love with me.” He winks.
“Sounds to me like I’m going to be spending a lot of that future, pregnant.” I must be in love with him because I like the idea of it.
“You better believe it, and it’s your own damn fault for making it look so fucking good.”
“Say that when the only way you can fuck me is to bend me over the couch.” I roll my eyes.
“Princess, if you think getting bigger is going to deter me, you couldn't be more wrong. It’s only going to make me want you more.”
“Nic, just fuck me.” I grip his hair and drag his lips down to mine.