Oops I Did It Again
Kit/Kat
T he next two days go smoothly, which makes me even more nervous about this ridiculous fucking dance on Saturday. Excited whispers amongst the guys disrupt every class, and it helps me fade into the background, even to the professors who hate me. Unfortunately, as grateful as I am about the ability to blend in when this big ‘kick-off’ event has the school buzzing, my anxiety is going nuts. Between maintaining my secret and avoiding being cornered by any number of malignant forces, it’s a lot.
“Are you still with me?”
I look down at X as they work on my outfit during the long free period mid-day. We’re in the center of my dorm—the new gathering area since the guys moved their chairs here—snacking on treats Salem left. He dragged the rest of them to Triclinium to help me be less worried as Xerxes does the final adjustments. They only have a day left to get this perfected so I’ll be able to get ready on Saturday.
“I am; it’s just…” My voice trails off and I fight the urge to shrug so I don’t mess up his lines. “…this is very nerve-wracking. I didn’t have great interactions with any of the students at my high school regardless of gender, and I have issues with damn near everyone here. It feels like this thing is adding more layers to the shit sandwich that is my reality.”
X smacks my thigh and I’m a bit surprised when I don’t react to their familiar touch. “You’ll be fine , Kit Kat. I guarantee no one here will screw with you now that we’ve established the dating thing. Admittedly, it causes other problems, but that’s better than ones that lead to injury.”
I arch a brow at them. “X, I get that you guys go to gender-specific schools for your entire education, so I’m going to explain this like I would to a kid. Girls will be here.”
“Yes.”
“This college is packed with rich, eligible, sex-starved idiot males who range from hetero to the ‘A’ in the rainbow.”
They nod, pausing to look at me. “Duh.”
“And they have the same?”
“I feel like we’re going somewhere, but it’s mostly just stating facts.” They wink at me, then fill their mouth with pins again.
“X, for fuck’s sake. Demons crave power and infamy, which comes with money and titles. This place is chock full of that, but at the top of the goddamn heap is our caliphate .” Their answer is muffled by the pins, but I’m fairly certain it would infuriate me. “None of you jackasses are on the market now because of me . That means every single female presenting demon who comes to this thing with delusions of grandeur is going to want to murder me.”
They blink, then spit out the pins in a loud ‘ptooey.’ I chuckle as it finally hits them that the dance will be even more precarious than the school is. “Well, shit, KK.”
“ That’s why I’ve been getting increasingly freaked out as we get closer. Paired with my outfit, and all the other crapola? I feel like we’re going to be surrounded by hungry predators looking to shove me out of their way with extreme prejudice.”
Xerxes sits back on their haunches, their rainbow detailed uniform skirt splayed around them in a graceful cloud. “Honestly, that’s probably better than them groping and pawing at you—and us. The combo events in secondary and middle grades were quite uncomfortable for me.”
“Because you’re gay? I thought demons?—”
They laugh, shaking their head and my skin heats as golden curls fall over their brow making them look even more gorgeous. “I’m not gay , Kit Kat. I fall somewhere around demi and pan, but I let people use the wrong terminology for specifically this reason. The females being single-minded about sexuality despite all evidence to the contrary in their own schools means I have far fewer people pawing at me because I’m an ‘easy in’ to the caliphate.”
The thought of someone using or pawing at them without their consent makes my blood boil.
Clenching my fists tightly, I grind out, “So… none of you are gay? All of you are? I feel… ill-prepared for how I am supposed to actually behave at this thing.”
X tsks softly. “That is not entirely my truth to share, Kit Kat, but you should feel comfortable in assuming there’s a fairly thorough rainbow representation amongst our caliphate. I’m sure you’ve gleaned that knowledge on your own. But none of us are like the extremist idiots from any of the realms who act as though there’s only one pairing that should exist.”
“Duh,” I mumble as my face gets redder. I don’t know why I’m so worried about the girls trying to get in their pants, nor why I want so much info on their sexual preferences.
Dudes here think I’m a convenient sex toy—so the whispers say when the guys aren’t around to stop them—so it shouldn’t matter, right?
But it does matter to me and I’m baffled as to why. It might be because these demons are my lifeline at Discordia and if they get distracted by courtship, my shit will take a backseat. Yes, that definitely is the problem; I’m worried I will become more of a burden if they find suitable girls to lavish attention on. I want to wrap my arms around myself as I frown, needing the comfort of making myself smaller as emotions rocket through me. I can’t, though, so my eyes skate over to my kinkajou.
It only takes a moment for her to scamper over, climb up my body and perch on my shoulder where she can hug my face. That soothes me, and I close my eyes as the touch of my support animal helps me calm before the anxiety ramps up too high to manage.
“Kit Kat, I can sense that,” X murmurs as they pin hems. “What’s got you freaked out again?”
If only I could tell them I’m falling victim to my own idiotic agreement, but I can’t—keeping my secret is too important to admit how fond I am of these dipshits.
The knock on the door startles me and I give Xerxes a panicked look. “Oh, damn, it’s Oriel.”
“Don’t want anyone but me to know what we have planned, hmm?” They give me a smug smirk when I nod shyly. “You look fabulous and I don’t blame you. My genius is simply made for your frame, man. You might even look better than me.”
“Uh, I highly doubt that,” I reply as I watch them pick up all the pins and things so I can scamper to the bedroom to get my mostly complete outfit off in private. “Keep him busy, please?”
X grins before I slam the door, and I breathe a sigh of relief. It’s been hard enough to keep myself covered in ways that shroud my smashed boobs, but Oriel will figure it out in thirty seconds. Xerxes isn’t looking, so he hasn’t noticed, especially because he uses magic in his measuring. But if I know the sharp-eyed crow hybrid, he won’t miss a single detail. I’ll be exposed and I need to prevent that from happening.
Of course, I say that given the gamble I’m already taking with this party, but no one ever accused me of being too logical.
“Kit Kat, hurry up! We have to get to Weapons before his Royal Dickhole-ness gets there.”
Oriel’s voice spurs me into movement, and I carefully strip off my dance duds, leaving them on my bed for X to hide once I leave. That means I’ll have to help cover for the cobra shifter if he ends up being late to Jasper’s class, too. Pulling on my normal uniform with jerky movement, I look around until I find my shoes. Once my boots are on, I walk over to the mirror and ruffle my growing hair, realizing I’m going to need to get it cut before it spoils my disguise.
Damnit. Too many things at once.
“It’s fine, Kit. Just grab your bag and your kinkajou, then head for class. Maybe you’ll get to smack someone around so you can vent your nervous energy.” I should only be so lucky, but Jasper hasn’t made us sit for class since the one time, so maybe it will be fine.
Blowing out a slow breath, I walk to the door, giving X a surreptitious thumbs up as I head for my messenger bag. “Okay, Dottie girl, we gotta go see the pissiest dragon we’ve met so far. Are you ready?”
She chitters happily, scampering over to tuck into my bag for the ride. I’ve noticed she likes to ride inside right after she eats a lot. I don’t blame her because I like to loll in comfort when I’ve stuffed myself, too.
“How is the whole sewing-outfit-dance thing coming?” Oriel asks as he watches Xerxes cleaning up the mess we left. “Is it okay? I think our stuff is being delivered Friday night.”
“Of course it is, you spoiled jackwad,” I say fondly as I bump his shoulder. “All of you, except X, are just being handed your shit.”
The crow shifter gives me a pointed look. “What exactly are you doing besides posing for them to measure?”
X stands, brushing off their knees and shaking a finger at O. “Kit is helping with design choices and it’s lovely to work with him. He’s very creative.”
I’m not sure I’d phrase my occasional remarks about color or cut as collaboration, but if X thinks so…
“Well, well,” Oriel says as he opens the door to our room. “That’s very interesting. I look forward to finding out what you have come up with.”
He may not say that when he sees it, but I’m not touching that with a ten foot pole. Instead, I nod and follow him to the elevator, hopping on. “You don’t have long to wait, nor do any of the other dudes I’m supposed to be escorted by.”
“That’s the first time you’ve phrased it that way. Did Xerxes say something that is making you concerned about the dance—other than our multitudinous enemies, of course.”
Me and my big fat mouth.
“We talked about the guests attending from the other colleges. I’m worried about the mass amount of people, especially…”
When I trail off, he grins at me like a fool until the elevator dings to announce the bottom floor. As we step out and head out through the lobby of the dorm, I notice that he’s looking especially smug again. I frown at my feet, keeping my eyes off of him until he finally speaks. “Oh, you’re worried about the bloody girls, eh?”
“Don’t be an ass.”
Oriel chuckles, and I elbow him as I pass through the front door, heading for the arena. “It’s hard not to be when you’re being this silly. How could you think we’re going to abandon you for some random tail fluttering in from afar?”
I blink, unsure how to respond to that ridiculously accurate assessment. “I… That’s not why it worries me!”
“Sure, KK. Whatever you say.”
My fists clench at my side and I scowl as I stomp across the quad with the pleased bird demon. “I do say. You know I have anxiety and lots of people I don’t know will trigger that. It’s especially bad when you add the social pressure of some stupid dance, who knows what bigwig fuckheads will show up, and now I have to wonder if I’ll get left like a purse in the club.”
He snorts, shaking his head. “First of all, X would never let anyone take a purse to a club, but if we did, you would be much more important than an accessory. That’s your damage talking, bud.”
Stupid bird is right, but I don’t want to tell him that.
“Well, excuse me if my experience with groups of dudes being flooded with opportunities to drink and get wild—especially in Hell—makes me think otherwise.” I sniff as we enter the double doors to the arena, giving him a suspicious look. “I don’t want to be cornered and have no one around to help this time.”
“Oh, that will never happen again, Kit Kat. I can promise you.”
Sure, but people in my life don’t have great track records with promise-keeping.