Quiet Burn (Discordia University #2)

Comfortable

Kit/Kat

“ I didn’t know Dank could create portals,” I mutter as Slash carries me through the bright magic. “I figured the one he brought me here with was… static?”

Slash’s laugh is a low rumble against my face. “No, little demon. Those of his species who live to be as old and powerful as the doctor are able to do many things younger demons cannot. Dr. D has innumerable talents you are unaware of.”

“It’s really unfair that I’m working so hard and I’m still so fucking behind. I’ll never catch up.” Frowning, I quiet down and stay buried in the comforting strength of his arms as he follows the others to our destination. I should complain about not being allowed to make it on my own, or protest his wordless assumptions, but… I’m so damned wiped from whatever I did in the arena that I can’t be bothered.

At least that’s what I’m telling myself.

The hand on my back pats lightly. “You will be fine. Stop expecting to master everything immediately; it is not possible, even for someone as determined as you.”

I sigh in frustration, then groan as it irritates my aching body. “That is very logical and also kind, but it’s hard for me to accept.”

“But you have accepted my ability to get you to safety, and you are uncomfortable with most contact. It follows that you can also accept my words.”

My nose wrinkles and I shut up because he’s right. I don’t feel like arguing that point when I feel so exhausted I can’t stay upright. I sense the toothy grin on his face without seeing it, and nearby, I hear Anton chuckle. I know he’s worried about X, so it’s good that he’s finding humor in something, even if it’s my hypocrisy. I can deal with the fallout later as long as everyone stops acting like we’re in a funeral procession.

We’re not, right? They’d tell me, wouldn’t they?

Suddenly, anxiety grips me and I tense from head to toe. I don’t think the guys would hide a potentially serious condition, but what if they’re trying to appease my trauma? My mind races with the possibilities, and I bite my lip as my heart speeds up with worry. I like Xerxes a lot . I like all of them a lot. Losing anyone I’ve allowed into my fragile psyche even a tiny bit will destroy me—that’s why I built the shell around me and have kept it solid for years. I’m not ready to be tested; I’m still healing from the last betrayal.

“Stop.”

I blink, then look up to see the shark shifter giving me a stern expression. “Huh?”

He rolls his eyes briefly then stares at me again. “Stop what you are doing. You’re quiet, but you are upsetting yourself. I can feel it in your pulse and the tension in your body. Whatever you are thinking, desist.”

“That’s not how anxiety works,” I mutter. “I can’t just… not think about things and be better.”

Slash huffs at me as if I’ve insulted his ancestors. “I’m not stupid, little demon. I realize you cannot simply stop thinking about things to control it. I meant for you to stop allowing it to control you . Use whatever techniques you normally do, as we’re arriving at the Doctor’s office, but he will need to tend to Xerxes first.”

Oh. Damn, I made him feel bad for not being verbose.

“Sorry, big guy,” I murmur. “I’m usually better at understanding you but right now…”

The train of demons stops, including us, and I feel his muscles adjust as he finds a chair that will accommodate us as we wait. The huge shifter demon lowers us into it carefully, then looks at me seriously as I get comfortable. “It’s okay. I know you did not mean anything by it. However, you are usually quite good at understanding what I say. More so than most.”

“I’m kind of useless at EQ when I’m close to an episode.” I shrug a little, my skin heating up as he looks at me. “It’s one of the things I can’t seem to regulate if I’m focused on trying not to flash back or panic.”

He pauses, tilting his head for a moment, then nods. “I can adjust to that. Thank you for sharing it with me.”

That’s all? No one ever just… accepts my shit without questioning it.

“You don’t want to ask why I can’t… be normal?”

His large hand runs over my hair, mussing it a little. “No one is normal. That is an illusion people cling to in order to feel accepted by their… preferred group. And it is also how they reject those they do not wish to accept while still feeling superior.”

I lift my head, looking up at Slash in surprise. “That’s… pretty fucking spot on.”

He gives me the trademark toothy grin and I fight the urge to duck my head. “I am quiet and I watch things. It’s easier to see the full picture when you’re not yammering like a chimpanzee.”

Laughing softly, I give him a crooked smile in response. “You know, you also distracted me from my panic attack. I think it might have been your plan all along.”

Slash shakes his head. “I would like to take credit for that, but I am not so devious. Of all of the demons in our caliphate, you will learn that I am the most straightforward. I am like…” He thinks about it for a moment, his brows furrowing. “Like the elephant in the cartoon Zavida enjoys. He made us watch it once because he likes the tiny people on the plant.”

My eyes widen and I cover my hand with my mouth when the realization hits. Giggles escape and I can’t stop it as I ask, “Did you just compare yourself to Horton the elephant ?”

“Yes. He is a much larger hero who saves the little ones, yes?”

This is priceless and it might be the best thing to happen all day.

“I mean… yes…”

“Then why do you seem so amused?”

I have to pause to get myself under control so I can figure out what to say without being offensive. “Because while accurate, it’s a cute kids’ movie and Horton is a little goofy. So I’m surprised a very masculine demon like you would willingly compare yourself to him. I doubt it would win you points with the ladies… you know, if there were any here.”

His brow furrows and he looks at me in confusion. “Why would I care about that?”

Before I can answer, Jasper comes storming into the hallway, looking like a dark storm cloud on the horizon. His eyes narrow when he sees me sitting with Slash, but he turns to look at half-dressed Oriel sitting with PandaSalem, then stalks over to where Zav is curled up in a big chair. Despite his ragged appearance, the dragon hybrid drops to a squat to pull the kitsune’s tails away from his face so he can see him.

“Zavvie… where are you hurt?”

I don’t often get to see the Prince behave like he’s not a psycho, so I tilt my head, watching closely. Slash leans in, his cheek next to mine as he murmurs, “Jasper is a good man. He struggles more than the rest of us because his father is… worse. But with Zavida, you see the man and not the demon he was raised to be.”

“I’m going to start calling you Yoda if you don’t stop that.”

His chuckle tickles my back and I sense another smile. “Yoda was very small. Zavida made us watch those movies once. I liked the small furry beings best. Very direct and without guile.”

Turning to look at him, I grin. “You like Ewoks? No one likes Ewoks.”

“I do not care what others like or do not like. They are cute, small, and aggressive. I enjoy all of those things, so it does not matter what anyone else thinks.”

“He’s not lying about that.”

My nose brushes Slash’s as I whip my head to look at Oriel. “Oh?”

The crow shifter smirks at me. “You haven’t been to his room. It’s very calming, but there’s a cabinet you should check out.”

“Uh… I don’t…”

“Not that kind of cabinet,” Oriel chortles, then coughs, holding his ribs. “Kit Kat, I wish you could have seen your face! It was priceless.”

“Oriel, I’m going to smash you flat.”

I pat the big guy’s arm lightly. “It’s okay. He’s being silly, and it doesn’t bother me like it used to. I’m getting… used to that kind of banter.”

“Really?”

Zav’s voice comes from down the hallway where Jasper is still kneeling in front of him and I nod, shrugging slightly. “Yeah. I mean, for some reason, I still look like a fucking tomato and like Anton says, I’m an awkward turnip about it…. But it doesn’t make me spiral or anything.”

The kitsune grins for the first time since class started, his eyes shining with a magical light. “That’s progress, Kit Kat.”

I’m about to reply when the dragon himself turns to me with his golden eyes, his expression intense. There’s a scale pattern on his neck that must mean he’s struggling to keep his animal in check—likely because he’s worried about Zavida and Xerxes. Jasper studies me like he’s trying to ferret out how truthful I’m being and so quickly I think I imagined it, a long, forked tongue flicks the air then retreats. He grunts, then shifts in his spot. “The shrimp is being truthful. He’s getting more comfortable with us.”

With them, you spiky-backed jackass—you still piss me off like no other being on the planet.

“Why the hell would I waste the energy to lie right now?” I grumble and Slash chuckles behind me. “I’m so fucking worn out that I’m letting someone carry me, you dipshit That should be a clue as to how blown I am.”

Oriel smirks, looking inordinately pleased, then turns back to the Prince. “That’s a fair point, Jas. The last time he was conscious and injured, he wouldn’t let anyone do that. KK is definitely too wiped to make shit up.”

“Thanks, man,” I mutter gratefully.

Something in the tone of my voice must trigger Jasper because in a flash, he’s up and stalking over to where I’m sitting with a dark look on his chiseled features. He’s chewing on his lip ring, which means he’s thinking, and within seconds, he’s squatting down to get eye level with me. I frown, unused to him being this direct without saying something snarky. “Are you injured, shrimp? Is that why you are uncharacteristically compliant?”

“Do not accuse me of mistreating him, Jasper.”

I blink, tearing my eyes away from the dragon to gaze up at Slash. “You’re not. And as much as it pains me to defend Prince Prickface, I don’t think that’s what he meant.”

The shark shifter narrows his eyes then looks at our leader. “He knows what he meant.”

I’m missing something important here and I don’t have the foggiest clue what, but I don’t want any fighting.

“Calm down, big guy. I can handle his pissypants questions, promise.” Even though it’s pushing my limit a little, I squeeze him with the arm I have trapped behind him. I’m surprised to get a warm, tight hug in return and for a moment, I simply revel in the security of it. No wonder people are so into this shit; if most people are as good as this guy, I see the appeal more than I used to. Though, I suppose part of it might be how big and strong he is and some primal instinct; either way, Slash hugs are fucking #goals.

A low rumble echoes in the room and I realize it’s coming from the bastard himself. I loosen my grip on the demon I’m perched on, then squint at the dragon curiously. “What the fuck is your problem? I said I’m not hurt. Hell, I even defended you. How did that manage to piss you off?”

Jasper just glares and I’m ready for him to say something mean when the door opens. Dr. D glides out, nodding silently, and I know it’s time for Zavida to go in. The Prince rises to his feet, stomping back to the smaller demon determinedly.

Looks like I’ve been saved by the Plague Doc yet again.