Chapter 4
Chapter Four
Thea
Seven Weeks Later
“ B e careful, doll.” Calder’s deep voice warned as he opened the passenger door to the 4x4 truck we were renting this weekend. He extended his hand for me to grab while he glanced down at the high drop I had to get out. I’d land right into a puddle of slush if I jumped down.
Instead, I opted to wrap my arms around his neck and jump into his arms. He grunted, pretending to be displeased while my legs wrapped around his waist. Calder’s grunts always sent me into a state of bliss. His nonverbal grumpy ass used them to communicate with me without actually having to open up his mouth. This deep, startled grunt sounded a lot like one that meant he was quite happy with me jumping into his arms.
I buried my face into his neck as he walked backward and away from the truck, then spun us so he was walking toward the cabin. That was the beauty of being with four men. I’d never have to walk a day in my life if I didn’t want to. One of them would always be willing to carry me, and I didn’t even have to beg.
I inhaled his scent of leather and motor oil, grinning as I did. Even after a shower and twenty-four hours out of the shop, he still smelled like he’d been under the hood of a car. He smelled like home. My chest constricted at the thought, and I squeezed my arms around his neck tighter.
“Don’t drop me,” I teased.
“Never, vixen,” Calder said. His knee bent as he lifted his leg and started up the steps to the cabin.
The rest of the guys were unloading the car, already calling dibs on the sleeping arrangements. It always made me laugh to hear them arguing about who’d get to sleep with me that evening, as if they had the final say.
The air was cold, and though it wasn’t snowing right then, it had been on our way through the Great Smoky Mountains.
Someone else hurried up the steps and passed me. He fumbled with the key, then opened the door. “Welcome to our home for the weekend,” Hendrix said.
I looked up now, smiling at him as Calder carried me over the threshold. I reached out, brushing my fingers against Hendrix’s cheek while we walked past him. He dipped his head, leaning into my touch.
Hendrix was my sweetheart. The glue that held us all together. Whenever there was a disagreement, he kept the mood light hearted. Whenever our daughter, Paisley, needed anything, Hendrix was the one who did it. He moved Heaven and Earth for my baby, and for me every day. I was grateful for everything he did for us, and I’d never be finished extending that gratitude.
“Holy shit. This place is gorgeous,” Hendrix said.
Calder plopped down onto the couch in the center of the open floor-plan living room and adjusted me on his lap so I could glance around too. I’d seen pictures of the cabin. I was the one who booked it. The first floor was open. A living room and kitchen area combined with no walls to divide them, a small game room/office area, and a half bathroom.
On the second level, I already knew there were two bedrooms and two full bathrooms. The main bathroom had a King-sized bed and a sitting area, while the second room had two queen beds. I knew when I was booking it that the sleeping arrangements would be ideal for our situation. Two of the men would be with me every night, the other two could have their own beds, and they’d probably take turns switching the nights. They usually only ever shared a bed if I was the meat in between their man sandwich.
“Who do you want to sleep with tonight, doll?” Calder asked.
I shrugged, hating to make the decision. If I had it my way, the five of us would be squished into one bed, so I didn’t have to be away from them. The body heat would be good in these snowy mountains, anyway.
“Don’t make her pick right now,” Parker said, his tone low and warning.
“I’m just trying to figure out where we need to put the luggage,” Calder defended.
“Up your ass,” Parker offered, flipping him the bird.
Hendrix chuckled, shaking his head.
Parker was my other sweetheart, not usually the one to make rude comments. But we were all under stress lately and trying to give him the space he needed. It came with strained jokes that I didn’t actually think were jokes. He was hiding behind them, unwilling to express his true emotions.
Calder’s grip on me tightened. He didn’t want to let me go, and I couldn’t blame him. He was too warm in this chilly weather to let go.
Shane entered last, closing the door behind him. He dropped a load of groceries on the floor. His bookbag landed next, then he kicked off his snow boots. His lips furrowed as a shiver ran down him. “Fucking hate the snow.”
I giggled, pressing a kiss to Calder’s mouth before climbing off his lap. He was the one who got the most jealous if I didn’t give him the attention he needed. It didn’t make sense, when he was also the one who enjoyed sharing me the most, too.
I headed for Shane. “You can stay inside the entire weekend,” I said, kissing his cheek. “I’ll keep you warm.”
His eyes darkened when they raked over my body. I wasn’t sure what he was picturing, but I knew it wasn’t me standing in front of him with the fluffy blue snowsuit that currently covered me from head to toe. There were no curves to appreciate in this thing.
“I’ll get dinner going,” I said, grabbing the groceries.
Shane nodded, helping me with the bags I left behind. We settled into a comfortable silence while he unloaded bags and I searched for the dishes I needed to make chili. The other guys were unloading the rest of our luggage. They came up and down the steps periodically, always coming into the kitchen to steal kisses or hugs as they passed through.
An hour later, the aroma of chili was filling the air, and my stomach was grumbling. Christmas music played from the stereo I brought with us on the kitchen bar. Shane and the rest of the guys had migrated to the game room. Their voices were loud, and I smiled as I heard them joking with each other.
My heart swelled with emotion. Those four men were more than just friends. They were brothers who served in a war together. Brothers who had been through hell and back both inside and outside of the military. And now, they were mine.
I squeezed my eyes shut, forcing away the tears as I set the table for dinner. My hormones were still crazy from the miscarriage I had seven weeks ago, so I blamed the crying on that. But then, the crying grew worse as I thought about that heartbreaking time.
We’d been so excited to tell Paisley she was going to be a big sister, but then I was hospitalized while we lost our baby. I never wanted to experience a loss like that again.
Warm hands wrapped around my stomach, pulling me into a hard chest. My eyes were still closed, and I inhaled his smell. Cherries and bourbon. Hendrix. My fixer.
His lips pressed to my temple. “Why are you crying, kitten?”
I cleared my throat, resting my hands over his on my stomach. “I miss Paisley,” I said.
And well, it wasn’t a complete lie, because I was missing our daughter, who was currently in California for the week visiting her grandparents with my ex-boyfriend,—her father—Kyle.
Hendrix didn’t need to know that I was crying for the baby. We were here to help move on. I didn’t want to put the burden of my sadness on them. Not this weekend.
His hands moved to my shoulders. “I miss her too. She’d like this place.”
“She would,” I agreed. “She’d love it. We need to bring her back.”
“We will, baby. Do you need help with anything?”
I spun, so we were face to face. My lips brushed against the dark scruff on his cheek. “Grab drink orders for me?”
“Sure,” he said.
“Dinner will be ready in ten.”
He nodded, disappearing back to the game room, and I was left to put myself together before the rest of my guys came out to find me a shattered mess.