Chapter 8
“Wrath.” Ruckus stands up knocking the woman who’s sucking his dick back on her ass when I step inside the clubhouse. He quickly tucks himself back in his jeans as he comes toward me, wrapping his arms around my shoulders, and patting my back.
“Not while your dick’s still hard.” I shove him off, and can’t help laughing at his half-hearted attempt to give me a dead arm.
“You still wearin’ that stupid thing in ya nose?” I flick the ring he has in his nostril.
“Hey, chicks dig the ring.” He shoves me off and just for a second it feels as if we’re eighteen again.
“So where’s our new president?” I look around the barroom for any sign of Raze.
“Would you believe me if I told ya he’s dealin’ with a female problem?” Ruckus raises his eyebrows.
“Raze?” I check he’s got that right. The Raze I remember didn’t involve himself in that kinda thing. Not anymore. He was my sponsor, and the last piece of advice he gave me was to avoid women at all fuckin’ costs.
“Yep, bitch turned up out of nowhere with a basket of muffins and now she’s staying at his beach hut.” Ruckus looks as confused as I am as he leads me toward the bar.
“And what about the guy who’s into my sister? Where’s he?” I stare at my best friend blankly.
“Tawk?” Ruckus laughs. “Tawk’s a good guy, and he’s committed to finding Willow. In fact he left here just the other week to chase up a lead he got on her.” His words unintentionally make me feel like a piece of shit.
When all the corrupt walls my father had built around him came crashing down, instead of facing up like a man, he ran scared and he took my little sister with him. Willow is innocent to all of this, and I’ve spent my whole life feeling like I let her down. The fact it’s this Tawk guy out there looking for her right now and not me proves that.
“If it’s the Missouri lead, I’ve already checked it out. It wasn’t them,” I tell him, already feeling the frustration of being back here. I’ve been assured by both Ruckus and Raze that any men who were loyal to my dad have left, and they better hope they're right.
“How about Freya, anyone heard from her?” I notice the way Ruckus’s jaw tenses when I mention my other sister’s name, him and her were always butting heads when we were younger.
“Nothing.” He shakes his head.
“Does she even know what Cliff’s done, and that Willow’s in danger?” I check.
“I don’t know Wrath, she’s your fuckin’ sister.” He snaps, then quickly knocks back the whiskey that Polly passes him across the bar.
The side door opens and when Raze steps inside, I can see he’s riled up from the way he slides his hand through his hair.
“How’s she doin’?” Ruckus asks with a smirk on his face that I know Raze will be considering re-aligning with his fist.
“She’s sleeping it off.” He flicks his chin at Polly so she knows to get him a drink then holds out his hand for me to shake.
“Better late than never.” He growls, before scanning his eyes around the room. “I need to speak to this Sinner guy.” His eyes focus on Saint like he’s about to go over to him and rip his head off his shoulders. I’ve heard about the brother here that’s got multiple personality disorder, people seem to have a lot of good things to say about Saint, but Sinner is something quite different.
“Sinners gone now, who knows when he’ll be back,” Ruckus tells him, tapping his glass on the bar to it get refilled.
“Then I’ll just have to go over there and rattle him back out.” Raze starts to move but I put myself in front of him.
“I don’t think it works like that.” I did a little research on the condition before I came here. I value my best friend's word on who we can trust, but this Sinner guy sounds shady. The kinda shady that would support my father.
“He’s right.” Ruckus stands up next to me. “You can’t be blamin’ Saint for the shit that Sinner pulls. He got no control over it and no recollection.”
“And just how often do we get a visit from Sinner,” Raze speaks through his teeth.
“Whenever Sinner wants to show up,” Ruckus laughs.
“Prez, can we talk?” Saint steps up behind him.
“I ain’t in the mood,” Raze growls back.
“I just wanted ya to know that whatever Sinner did, may not have been my fault, but I’m real sorry on his behalf.”
“Yeah, well I’m sorry for what's gonna happen to your body when he decides to make his next appearance.” Raze knocks back his drink then shoulder barges past him and heads for the office.
“I got it.” I tap Ruckus on the shoulder and follow after him, letting myself inside without knocking, and then closing the door behind me.
“Hear ya got a female stayin’ at your place.” I start off, looking around the office that used to be my father's. It still smells of him in here and it puts a nasty taste in my mouth.
“This ain’t about her if that's what you're thinkin’.” Raze cuts me off. “This is about brothers not following fuckin’ orders. This charter needs bringing into line and I can’t do that if my members ain’t showin’ no respect.” He pulls open the top drawer and then slams it back shut again. I can sense that now ain’t the time to be askin’, but I can’t help myself.
“Ya started looking for her yet?” I take a seat and use my mouth to pull a smoke outta the packet.
He looks up at me and I can tell from the shock in his eyes that he had no intention of telling me that Eden is still alive.
“Yeah, I got a call from Consuela too.” I manage to hold back my anger, but it’s real hard to hide my hurt. Growing up I looked up to Raze, I aspired to be him and I know I let him down, but him knowing that his sister’s still out there and not telling me about it feels like a betrayal.
“Wrath, I've been in town for five goddamn minutes.” He shakes his head.
“I get that, but we both know that she’s the reason we’re here,” I point out.
“And what do you suppose we’re gonna say to her when we find her?” He stares at me with a pain in his eyes that I told myself ten years ago I never wanted to see again. “We failed her, Wrath. So bad that she wanted us to think she was dead.” He reminds me of a cold hard fact that's been weighing me down ever since the ATF agent who helped Jimmer save the club, got in touch with me. I have no idea how the hell she knew about my past but she was hell-bent on ensuring Jimmer Carson’s plan to have me and Raze back in Long Beach came together.
“That doesn’t change the fact that we’re both here. Back in fuckin’ hell.” I call him out because I need him to know that I’m not the same eighteen year old kid who he mentored. I’m not scared of shit anymore, not even my past. He wanted me to come here and be his VP and here I fuckin’ am.
“We should talk about what happened…” I lower my voice and feel that steel cold fist, that's permanently inside me, clench around my heart.
“No.” He cuts me off firmly. “I don’t wanna talk about it, I don’t wanna picture it. I don’t even wanna fuckin’ think about it.” He looks away from me and shakes his head. “Yeah, I came back here because of her, but only to check that she’s okay. She doesn’t want me in her life and I accept that. And the same goes for you.” He points his finger at me, making it sound like an order. I notice the way it trembles. I just can’t decide if it’s out of fear or out of rage.
“I already know she’s not gonna want me in her life, but that doesn’t mean I won’t make sure she’s safe and has everythin’ she needs. I’ll help you get this club back on its feet, but I’ll make this clear to you now, Raze. Your sister is my priority, and I’m sorry to ya for a lot of things, but I’ll make no apologies for that.” I get up and leave him to think on what I just said. It’s time I had a drink with my best friend.