Raze (Dirty Soul MC: Long Beach #1)

Chapter 25

Nobody is more shocked to see the woman who’s standing in front of me now than I am, and although she’s looking very fuckin’ different to the last time I saw her, she still seeps rage into my veins.

“Tell me what you came to say then get out.” I take a seat and light myself a smoke.

“Don’t be like that, Raze, it’s been a long time.” She smiles as she perches on the end of her chair like she’s some kinda fuckin’ lady.

“Not long enough.” I shake my head and feel like such a damn idiot for ever having feelings for this woman.

I walk outta the prison gates and take in a deep breath of fresh air and freedom, then I head straight for the bus depot. I could have called the club and had one of the boys come pick me up, but I’ve worked really hard on keeping my early release a surprise. Stacey may have stopped visiting a few months ago but she still writes and she’s promised me she’ll stay at the club until I get back.

It’s a nine-hour journey back to Long Beach and I spend every minute of it thinking of the ways I can make up the time we’ve been apart. I’m gonna do everything I possibly can to get her that condo she wants, and this time without getting myself locked up.

I get off the bus and start heading toward the club, wondering how Wrath has been getting on, it wasn’t just Stacey I let down when I went to prison. I’d made a commitment to him, one that I couldn't see through, and I feel bad for that. I just hope he’s got his cut and is now a fully-fledged member because if anyone deserves it, it’s him.

“Raze.” Ruckus looks shocked to see me when I arrive at the gate he’s standing guard at. He stands up from the crate he’s sitting on and opens it, and I wonder why he looks so nervous.

“Still not patched in, I see.” I slap his prospect cut as I make my way through. “How about Aaron, is he–”

“Raze, we weren't expectin’ ya back here for another six months,” he interrupts.

“What can I say? I’m a charmer. I got an early parole hearin’ and here I am. I hope you’ve been keepin’ up on your sparrin’, just ‘cause I’ve been away ain’t no excuse for you to have slacked.” I raise both my fists into a guard and when he smiles sadly and looks down at his feet, I know for sure that there's something wrong. I’ve been teaching both him and Aaron, how to fight and they both have a natural talent for it.

“Where’s Stacey? She at work?” I ask, knowing that she’s gonna be excited to see me. I told her a year and here I am, after just six months. I guess helping Paul Monkhouse rid the world of that fucker who raped his daughter really did have its perks.

“No, Raze, she ain’t at work. She’s inside the clubhouse.” Ruckus looks a little pale and continues to avoid eye contact with me. I don’t know what the fuck’s gotten into him while I’ve been away, but I much prefer the cocky asshole he was before.

I leave him to it, stepping through the arch and into the yard, where I see Finn, Davey’s son, sitting by the empty pool and rolling himself a blunt.

“Looks good on ya, kid.” I nod across at him when I see he’s wearing a prospect jacket too, now. The kid can’t be any older than fourteen, he must be keen.

“Raze.” He stands up and throws a look toward his dad when Davey steps outta the clubhouse, and straight away I know there's something wrong.

“What the fuck you doin’ here?” Davey tosses the smoke he was about to light at the floor.

“Not exactly the welcome I was expectin’. I got early parole, you wanna tell me what's goin’ on?” I move toward the door but he blocks me.

“Raze, before ya go in there, I think me and you need to have a talk,” he tells me in that deep, rich voice of his.

“A talk? I’ve been inside for six months. I wanna beer and some alone time with my old lady.” I go to move past him and he blocks me again.

“Davey, what the fuck’s going on?” I hear the nerves in my laughter because I really am starting to worry. The look on his face tells me whatever it is, I ain’t gonna like it.

“I don’t know what to say to ya, Raze. This place, it’s all goin’ to shit.”

“Get out my way.” I force myself past him and barge through the door, barely able to see across the floor for all the smoke that’s clouding the room. There’s some woman off her tits dancing in the middle of the floor like she’s having some kind of spiritual awakening and when I look to the couch on my left and see the woman I’m in love with sprawled out on it, I hardly fuckin’ recognize her.

“Stacey.” I lean over her and lift up her head, it’s slumped right back, and the fact she’s laid out in just her underwear shocks me, as much as it angers me.

“Stace, what the fuck?” I notice that her stomach is much rounder than it was before I left, and as she slowly starts to come around she makes a moaning noise that sounds as if she’s in pain.

“Raze.” She smiles at me vacantly as she opens her eyes. “You came home.”

“Stacey, what the fuck happened to ya?” She sits up and strokes her hand over her face.

“Cliff.” She calls his name across the room like I ain’t even here.

“Stacey, are you fuckin’ high?” I look at the syringe that’s on the table, and the spoon that’s still got residue on it. This ain’t the kinda drugs we do around here.

“What the fuck you doing here, Raze?” She strokes her head as if it’s hurting and sounds more disappointed than surprised.

“I got parole, Now, how about you tell me what the fuck’s goin’ on?”

“Cliff!” she calls out again.

“Ahhh, Raze.” My president steps outta his office with a grin on his face. “I wasn’t expectin’ ya back so early.”

“What the fuck has happened here?” I look from him back to her, feeling all my rage starting to make its way to the surface. I left behind a woman who rolled her eyes at me for smoking a cigarette. I’ve come home to what looks a lot like a fuckin’ junkie.

“Baby, is it time for another hit?” Stacey looks up at Cliff as if she’s going to cry and he rests beside her and smoothes his hand through her hair.

“Not yet, sweetie, we’re tryin’ to ween you off, it’s bad for the baby.” When I notice his hand drop to her stomach I take a step back and feel daggers slice open my chest.

“Is it m?—”

“She’s five months along, do the maths.” The cunt winks at me. “I told ya I’d take care of her while you were away.” He laughs.

“Mother fucker!” I charge for him but immediately get yanked back, and when I glance over my shoulder and see that Mac and Rex both have hold of me, I start fighting to get free.

“Stacey,” I call out her name as she looks up at Cliff and smiles at him like he’s the end to all her problems.

“Why don’t you show Raze who you belong to now?” He pats her head like she’s his pet, then takes his cock outta his pants.

“He was here and you weren’t. I needed someone, Raze.” Stacey makes a real lame attempt at an explanation as she takes his cock in her hand and starts pulling him through her fist.

I manage to get free, after knocking Mac out with a punch to his temple, but I’m grabbed again by someone I ain’t ever seen before.

“I’d go careful, Raze, you know what the price is for killin’ a brother.” Cliff smiles at me coldly, as my old lady takes his cock in her mouth. I stop fighting and stare him straight back.

“She’s good at this, you must have really missed it durin’ those long nights in Boise.” He strokes her hair and rests his head back, letting out a deep, satisfied moan.

“You're a cunt.” I shake my head at him, knowing now that all the suspicions I had while I’ve been away were true. This fucker set me up on that run to Mexico, he set me up because he saw me as a threat to the empire he’s building.

I stand and endure every single second of his torture because I won’t let him see that he can break me and when he closes his eyes and comes in her mouth, he laughs as he pushes her away.

“Shoot her up, Rex.” He taps her cheek before making his way over to me, tucking himself back in his jeans.

“As you can see, there’s nothin’ left here for you now, Raze.” He slams his shoulder into mine and heads for the bar. I stand and watch as Rex sticks a needle into the woman who I’ve been thinking about for six months straight. A woman who, for most of that time, has been carrying another man's child.

“Stacey.” I push him out the way and grab her before she loses herself.

“Stacey, listen to me. You need to come with me. You're gonna die here. Think about your kid.”

“No.” She shakes her head as her eyes start to flicker.

“Stacey, he did this to you and I can get ya help, just come with me.”

“I love him,” she manages. “I told you I wouldn’t wait, Raze.” She smiles sadly before the euphoria takes over and she rolls her head back against the couch. I want to kill every single man that's looking at me, and when I realize that there's only four of ‘em in here, the thought actually crosses my mind. Rex is the only decent fighter among them and I’ve proved time and time again that I can beat his ass.

“Raze.” I hear Davey’s voice come from the door and when he steps inside and starts dragging me out, I push against him.

“Raze, ya need to leave before you do somethin’ stupid.” I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but suddenly I feel too weak to fight back. I’ve never felt that way before, and it allows him to drag me all the way outside.

‘Here.” He reaches into his pocket and pulls out the key to my bike.

“I’ve kept it runnin’ for ya, you get on it and you ride the hell away from here.”

“He… Did ya see?” I can barely get my words out. “He’s ruined her, and he did it just to spite me.”

“I know, we all know. But, Raze, he’s countin’ on you reactin’.”

“You let it happen.” I point my finger at him accusingly.

“Hey…” His boy shows he really has grown some balls while I’ve been away when he comes outta nowhere and shoves me in the chest.

“Don’t you dare blame my dad. That whore was sniffin’ around him way before you got locked up, she fucked him before you were even past the border to Mexico.”

“Finn!” Davey yells at him.

“Come on, Dad, we all know it’s true. Cliff didn’t like that you’ve been turnin’ Aaron into somethin’ good and this is how he’s takin’ his revenge.”

“Where is Aaron?” I shake my head.

“None of us know,” Davey admits. “He patched in and then he went nomad. Somethin’ happened, Raze, somethin’ real bad.” Davey looks deflated.

“What?” I’ve only been gone six months and I can’t keep up with all that’s happened.

“I don’t know, but it changed him. He has a darkness in his eyes now, the kind you don’t come back from. He’s better off gone and so are you.”

I look the old man in the eyes and can see how tired he is. I have no idea why he sticks around. Davey’s a good guy, one of the best of ‘em and this place is going to the gutter.

“Come with me,” I tell him. “Bring ya boy. Leave Cliff and this place to rot.”

“I can’t, the Burlusconi deal is the biggest one the club has, we need this charter to keep it running. I got work to do here, it may seem hopeless, but I’m a foundin’ member, just like your dad. I got a duty.”

“And what about him, do you want this for your son?” I look to his boy, who’s wearing the prospect cut.

“He knows the risks, and we need some kinda hope for the future.” He points out, before dropping my keys into my palm and closing it up

“Leave this place behind you, Raze, take your skills and put ‘em to good use.” I nod my head at him when I realize he’s right. I have to leave. If I don’t, I’ll live up to my name and destroy everything in sight. I start to walk backward, through the arch, and into the parking lot. My bike is in the corner, and I tear off the cover Davey must have put over it and take the saddle.

Ruckus is still standing by the gate looking guilty and now I know why. Though he has no cause to be. None of this is his fault, he’s just a prospect.

I start my engine and, as he opens them for me to exit, I stop before I pass through.

“You need to follow in your best friend's footsteps and get the hell outta here,” I warn him, pulling back my throttle and taking off before I go back in that clubhouse and make Cliff Adams dead.

“Raze, I know you hate me.” Stacey reminds me that she’s still here when she speaks up again.

“I don’t hate ya, I don’t care enough to hate ya.” I laugh at her.

“I came here to help you.” She gets short with me.

“And how the hell do you suppose you're gonna do that? Where's your kid Stacey, the one ya let Cliff put in ya while I was away?” I often wondered if the poor thing survived.

“He’s at home with his stepfather and he’s safe.”

“For now, but a day might come when Cliff decides he?—”

“Cliff thinks he’s dead, just like you think your sister is. And that's why I’m here because she’s not, Raze, and I can’t keep that from you anymore. I know where you can find Eden and it’s closer than you think.” Her words slice through me and leave me numb, and all this time I’ve spent convincing myself I don’t want to know feels like a waste because now it seems like all that matters.

“How do you know this?” I suddenly give her my full attention.

“Because Jimmer Carson helped her, the same way he helped me.” She rests back in her chair and lets her shoulders sag. “He’d come here for a visit not long after you got released and I asked him for help. I knew from what you’d told me, when we were together, that he was a fair man and I knew if I carried on doing what I was doing, that it would kill my baby. I asked him to take me back to Colorado so I could get clean, and on the ride back I found out why he was really out here.”

“And why was he?”

“He’d come for her. He knew she was in trouble and he’d come to take her away from this place. We stopped off in Utah and dropped her off with some family he knew who were gonna take care of her.”

“And was she okay?”

“No, she was a wreck.” Stacey shakes her head and starts to cry. “We both were and I heard Jimmer talking to her when she got out the van. He promised her he’d make sure she was never found and that she was getting a whole new life.”

“She cried and asked for you, but he told her it was for the best.”

“What?” I yell at her. There’s no way Jimmer would ever have done that.

“He said that you and Aaron had to think she was dead. That it was the only way for her to be kept safe, and I didn’t know why at the time but now?—”

“So she’s in Utah?” I should breathe a sigh of relief because that’s far away from here but I’m sure Stacey said something about her being close.

“She was.” Stacey swallows thickly.

“About two years ago me and Steven moved to Beverly Hills so I could help take care of my sister, and I saw Eden when I was picking up her meds. She lives about 30 miles from here. I couldn’t believe that she was so close, but there she was pushing a cart around the grocery store and looking real happy.”

“No. Why would she go through all the trouble of makin’ me think she was dead if she was gonna come back here?”

“It wasn’t her that wanted you to think it,” she reminds me of what her story’s brought to light.

“Then who was it?”

“It was your father. I asked Jimmer after we’d dropped her off what her story was and he said he was doing an old friend a favor. I don’t know why your dad put you through that, Raze, you’ll have to talk to him about it. But when I found out you were back I couldn’t keep it a secret any longer.”

“I know why he did it.” I don’t mean for those words to come out, but hearing all she just said makes sense and it’s evidence that the old man really does hate me. But there’s one thing that doesn’t add up.

“Why would she come back here?” I think out loud for a second time.

“Because she met someone.” I didn’t expect Stacey to actually have the answer, but when I hear it, despite all that’s happened, my thoughts immediately go to Wrath and I can’t help feeling sorry for him.

“That day had been a tough one. I was glad to get out of the house, and seeing her made me curious. I stopped and asked her if she remembered me. We ended up getting a coffee and she told me all about her life.”

“You spoke to her?” I lean forward, curious as to what she knows.

“She went to college, got her degree and she’s living her dream, Raze.” I feel a tear form in my eye when I hear that. I never got to know Eden all that well, but I know how much she wanted to be a costume designer.

“She told me she wasn’t gonna let what happened here ruin her chances of breaking Hollywood.” Stacey laughs and despite the way I’m feeling, so do I.

“We keep in touch, I even got an invite to her wedding.” She smiles as she hands over a business card. I look at the name on it and frown.

Katie Sullivan Design.

“She has her own studio, and she’s worked on some pretty, big movies, you should be real proud.”

“Why are you givin’ me this?” There’s also an address for the studio and a number is on the card.

“I don’t know what happened to her, or why your dad wanted you to be apart, but I’m guessing you’d like those answers. I think she’s ready for a visit from her big brother.” Stacey smiles at me as she stands up.

“Wait.” Suddenly, I realize that she really did come here to do a good thing.

“Your kid, you sure Cliff thinks he’s dead?”

“I took inspiration from your dad’s idea, I figured it would be the only way to ensure his father never came looking for him. I’d appreciate it if that could stay between us. He’s a good boy, he does well at school and he knows nothing about this kind of life.” She looks around the walls surrounding us and when her smile turns sad, I nod my head back at her.

“I’m sorry.” I look at the card in my hand, then raise my eyes up to hers. “I’m sorry Cliff did to you what he did, it would never have happened if I wasn’t in prison.” I spent a lotta years blaming myself for the mess Cliff turned her into, she may not have been faithful to me, but no one deserves that.

“None of it’s your fault. I was a different person back then, you wouldn’t have been on the run if I wasn’t demanding that damn condo.” She laughs.

“As far as I’m concerned, all that's in the past.”

“Well, I appreciate this.” I hold up the card and realize just how much I mean that. She’s just given me the chance to speak with my little sister and at least apologize for not being there for her.

“You’re welcome.” Stacey smiles before she leaves and after staring at the address for a few long minutes, I tuck the card into my cut and head out to the barroom.

The first thing I notice is that Peyton isn’t anywhere in sight, then I realize that everyone is staring right at me.

“Nothin’ to see here.” I shake my head at them all before heading to the bar to ask Polly where my girl went.

“What the fuck did she want?” Wrath comes up behind me, and I feel the card that holds all the answers he wants, burning inside my pocket. I heard loud and clear what Stacey told me. Eden’s happy, she’s found someone and I will not let him take that away from her.

“She heard I was back in town and wanted to clear the air.” I shrug my shoulders and pass it off as nothing. I failed my sister ten years ago. I won’t do that again.

“She wanted to clear the air?” Wrath repeats looking unconvinced.

“That’s right.” I nod.

“Well, you might have some clearin’ of your own to do because your old lady stormed outta here looking pretty pissed,” Ruckus interrupts and without asking any more questions, I head off to find her.