Restrictions (Sterling Family #2)

30. Asher

30

ASHER

T hings with Viv have grown into a comfortable groove, one I should know is dangerous but which, so far, has honestly worked out.

During the day, we’re the exact same, a well-oiled machine. School, daycare, play with Baz, eat dinner, tuck him in.

At night, Viv and I play our own little games.

She doesn’t sleep in my bed after we’re finished. She always goes back to her own bed.

I don’t miss other pussy.

Not yet.

I keep waiting for the urge to fuck it all up overtake me. She swears to me it will be amicable as long as I tell her first.

But come on? What chick is that fucking cool?

“Hey.” Hands grab my shoulders as I sit outside, looking up at the stars. I smile when I hear Viv’s voice as she sits in the chair with me, and I wrap my arm around her.

“Hey.”

“Long day?” She rests her head on my shoulder, and I feel a nagging part of me telling me that I need to set boundaries. That chilling in a lounge chair, talking and not fucking is a bad idea.

“Not too bad. What about you? ”

She shrugs, pulling the sleeves of her sweatshirt over her hands. “Not bad, but definitely long. Baz woke up early.” I can hear her smile even though it’s dark out and she’s not looking directly at me. “And someone kept me up late.”

I smirk, holding her small body closer to mine, thinking about last night in my bed. “Yeah well, if it were up to me, we would have gone again.”

I turn to look at her in time to see her bite that fucking bottom lip, tempting me like she always does.

I lean to her ear. “You know what that does to me. It reminds me of when I’m making you come.”

I hear her suck in a deep breath, pulling the air into her lungs and holding it there before letting it out in a shaky succession. “And I’m all for you doing that again and again, but I have to talk to you about a couple things first.”

Fuck. I don’t want to talk. Talking is dangerous . It leads to faux feelings, unkeepable promises and dumbass mistakes. “You know, I think I’m going to have to make that a rule. No more talking.” My lips slide down the skin of her neck, and then I feel her hand grip my chin, redirecting my attention to her face as she turns to her side to look at me.

“Ash, we’re friends first, who live together and both take care of a certain young man.”

“Who?” I smirk. She releases my chin and shoves my chest playfully. I like that I can mess around with Viv, just be goofy and shit. I also kinda fucking hate that she brings that out in me. I’m more comfortable being the broody shithead.

“Baz has a request for Halloween, and it’s only a few weeks away.”

“Okay? What does he want?”

She sighs and lays back in the crook of my arm. “Wizard of Oz. He’s obsessed, and I have no idea why.”

I laugh. “We may have watched that a couple of times.”

She shakes her head. “He loves that it’s in Kansas, and I didn’t have the heart to tell him it’s about leaving Kansas.”

“Hey, there’s no place like home.”

She laughs at that, an adorable, light laugh, and it’s good to see her relax. “Right. Well he wants to be the lion.”

“Of course.” The kid walks around the house roaring like a lion daily. I should have seen this coming.

“And he wants me to be Dorothy.” Her head tilts up toward me, and I know where this is fucking going.

“What? Oh come on, I haven’t dressed up for Halloween since I was like eight.” She pushes her bottom lip out, visible in the dim moonlight, and I lean down and bite it gently, then releasing it but speaking against her parted lips. “And what do I get? If I dress up as one of the remaining characters?”

Her plump lips press to mine as she speaks against them. “Anything you want.”

I pull her body onto my lap, holding her hips with my hands. “Anything?”

She pretends to think about it, bringing one finger to her chin and then nods. “Yeah.”

“So... after the kid goes to sleep on Halloween, I get to take Dorothy to my room?”

She smiles, shaking her head, her hands resting on my shoulders. “You have a fucking Dorothy fantasy?”

I never had one before, but picturing her in anything gives me a fucking hard-on. She’s fucking intoxicatingly sexy in any outfit. “I guess I do now.”

“I can do that.” One of her hands slides down my chest that’s currently clad in a t-shirt and a jacket. Damn fall crisp night. I’m wearing too many layers. “So which one do you want to be? The Tin Man or the Scarecrow?”

“I am, without a doubt, the Tin Man.”

She studies me, analyzing my choice, and I don’t think she likes it. “You think you don’t have a heart, Asher Sterling?”

“If I do, Vivienne Crenshaw...” My hands smooth over her back as I lay a kiss over her heart. “It’s black.”

“I’ve seen your heart, Asher. It’s not black and cold, no matter how much you want people to believe it is.”

“I’ve done some pretty bad shit.”

“Haven’t we all?”

I shake my head. “No. You haven’t.”

“Asher.” She rests her hands on the sides of my face and implores me to look at her. “I had sex with someone I knew had a girlfriend because I wanted to feel in control of my own life for once. I started you all on a horrific path because I wanted it, because I’m a thrill-chaser.”

I look into her eyes in the dark night and feel a connection to her that I fear deeply. “You let yourself do that once.”

“It was big.” One hand slides down my throat to the middle of my chest. “And no...” She bites her bottom lip again and edges closer to me. “I’ve found a new thrill.”

A replacement.

My head tilts back, leaning against the chair, and I feel her lips press against my throat, sending a mixture of nausea and arousal through me.

“One like none other. I get chills when I think about what you’ll do to me. If you’ll sneak into my room or if I’ll sneak into yours, knowing that no one would like what we’re doing.”

I feel her hands slide under my jacket and shirt, caressing my stomach, and I fight the insecurities built into me.

Is it like none other to her or she still chasing the original?

“Mommy?”

Shit! Viv jumps off me, and I turn to see a sleepy Baz rubbing his eyes in his Spiderman pajamas, looking at us with curiosity. “Sebastian, what are you doing out of bed?”

Okay, could have been a lot worse. And he’s only three. Chances are his first memory won’t be his mom straddling his uncle.

“Why were you on Uncle Asher’s lap?” I look over at my nephew. Christ this is fucked-up even for the Sterlings.

“Hey, buddy. It’s cold out. We were just keeping warm.”

Viv looks at me, her right eyebrow raised, and I look at her, gesturing for her to go with it because what the fuck else are we going to say? Baz scratches his little head, clearly still half-asleep and playing to our favor for the bad fucking coverup.

Viv clears her throat. “It’s cold out. Too cold for little guys in their pjs.”

She ushers him back inside, tossing a look at me with a smile and head shake before I lay my head back, looking up at the stars and wondering in a weak moment if Colt is watching.

Knowing if he is, he has to be pissed because this is not how he would handle any of it.

Not the nearly perfect Colt Sterling.