Return to Mariposa

Chapter 19

When I woke, it was in darkness, and I scooted over on the bed to turn on the meager bedside lamp. I hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but exhaustion must have overtaken me, and I’d slept through the afternoon and into the evening. Dragging myself out of bed, I shoved a hand through my unruly tangle of hair and blinked. Depending on the hour, the house was probably empty, and for the first time, I was regretting my refusal to join the others.

I shook myself. I was being silly—Maldonado would be here, and I would finally be able to track down Ian and settle things. There was nothing to be nervous about.

The light beside my bed flickered, and then went out, plunging me back into the darkness, and I had to swallow a little squeak of dismay. The electricity at Mariposa was notoriously unstable—the power had gone out on at least three occasions in the few days I’d been there. Maldonado would fix it.

Maldonado did not fix it. There was a bright, three-quarter moon overhead, streaming a fitful light through my open window, complete with the soft scent of bougainvillea, and I took a deep, encouraging breath. I knew where the electric panel was; I could throw a breaker as well as anyone. I had an iPhone with a flashlight app on it—I’d be perfectly fine.

The inky darkness of the hallway wasn’t particularly reassuring, but I held my phone on high, illuminating the pathway. The cousins were at the opposite end of the house, and I had no idea where Marcus slept. There would be no one close by, assuming they were even in the house.

They weren’t, I knew that, and I didn’t like it. I was entirely alone in the old house I’d always loved, but I told myself there was nothing to be nervous about. That gunshot this afternoon had to be a random hunter—there was no reason anyone would want to hurt me.

I was near the top of the stairs when I realized I’d forgotten to put on shoes, making my progress unnervingly silent. I was about to start down the stairs when I heard it—the soft scuffle of a shoe, the almost imperceptible sound of someone breathing.

“Is anyone here?” I called out, steeling myself.

There was no answer, just the quiet squeak of the old wood as someone stepped on it. “Hello?” I tried again. Silence.

I wasn’t going to panic—there was nothing to be afraid of. I could simply turn and shine the flashlight to the top of the stairs and see who was there. Stalking me.

I took another step down, holding on tightly to the banister. Again, an answering creak from above, and all my brave self-talk began to vanish. I descended the staircase a little faster, as my heart began to race and my breath caught. There’s no one there, it’s just the sound of the old house, there’s no one there, I told myself, over and over again as I edged my way down into the darkness. Everyone’s gone out, no one wants to hurt me, I’m perfectly safe...

I reached the first floor and my fragile bravado failed me. I began to run, racing barefoot across the tile floors to the massive stone staircase that was the centerpiece of the house. My heart was beating so loudly, I couldn’t hear if anyone was coming after me, but it didn’t matter. Panic had taken hold of me, and I knew I had to get away from there. I scrambled down the last flight, almost tripping in my haste to get away, and I reached the bottom with a gasp of relief.

Peering back up the stairs, I could see no one, not even with the help of the flashlight, but I was sure I hadn’t imagined those quiet footsteps. Someone had wanted to frighten me. The same with the gunshot earlier today—it had been a warning, and I had better start paying attention.

But why would someone want to hurt me? I hadn’t done anything to anybody, I was just...

I was just Bella. Bella, with the gangster boyfriend and the devious ways, Bella who cared for no one but herself. I realized that truth now without an ounce of surprise—I had always believed in Bella’s vision of herself: charming, kind, glamorous. She was charming and glamorous, all right, but that kindness had been nothing but a front, and clearly she’d made more enemies than she or I realized.

No, cancel that. She probably realized all too well how many enemies she had. I’d been the perfect patsy—anyone who wanted to hurt Bella would come after her doppelganger. That sudden, sharp knowledge was like a stab to the heart.

I felt cold, so cold, even on this warm spring night, and I didn’t know whether I was shaking from the chill or fright. How could they have left me at the mercy of whatever dreadful thing wanted to hurt me? How could Ian have simply vanished...?

He hadn’t vanished after all. There was a light under the library door, and I froze. Had he finally returned? Or was it one of my enemies, lying in wait for me again, determined to finish me off?

Suddenly my panic dissolved into anger. How dare he abandon me like that, how dare he disappear, leaving me to the mercy of God knew what? Ignoring my chill, I strode across the hallway, reached the door to the library, and slammed it open in a fine fury.

He was standing over the desk, and he looked up at me in the moonlight, clearly not glad to see me. Fuck him.

“Where the hell have you been?” I demanded.

He just stared at me. “None of your goddamned business. What’s wrong?”

I looked at him, taking him in for the first time in days. He looked exhausted, those piercing blue eyes shadowed in the moonlight, his hair rumpled, unshaven, beautiful. And I couldn’t allow myself to be vulnerable.

“Why did you tell Salvador to follow me?” I demanded abruptly.

“Someone threatened you at the taberna.”

“Yes. But I saw Salvador before that happened.”

“Let’s just say I wasn’t sure you were safe, especially after the Alfa crashed—I’d just had it serviced. The brakes shouldn’t have failed. You’ve made a lot of mistakes over the years, Bella-Beast. Your latest boyfriend’s a murderer and you’ve done something to piss him off, which wasn’t wise on your part. There have been people in town asking after you, strangers showing up at Mariposa. If you’re going to get yourself killed, it’s not going to be on my watch.”

“I’m touched,” I said sweetly. “Then why don’t you let me go?”

“You’re still my responsibility.”

“I am not!” I shot back. “I can take care of myself.”

“You haven’t been doing a very good job of it—you’ve probably amassed any number of enemies over the years. I was just making sure you were safe.”

“You weren’t doing a very good job of it. Someone shot at me today,” I said, and his cold cynicism dropped for a minute.

“You were shot at? When? Where?”

“Ask your stooge. He scared the hunter away, said he was someone going after rabbits, but I don’t believe him any more than I believe you. Someone wants me dead, and it’s probably you!”

A thunderous look crossed his face, and he took a step toward me, then stopped himself. “It’s tempting.”

All the calm that I’d managed to drag around me short-circuited, and if he’d been near enough, I would have slapped him. The best I could do was say “fuck you” as I slammed the library door behind me, heading back up into the darkness and the shadowy nemesis that may or may not be there.

I heard the library door slam open again, and I ran, determined to lock myself in my bedroom away from everybody. My fury had overtaken my earlier panic, and if I weren’t such a coward, I would have gone straight out to the brand-new Alfa and ground its gears all the way down into town.

He was right behind me, and I knew he was no mysterious threat. He was Ian, and he was enraged, even more so when I tried to shove my bedroom door closed.

He was much stronger than I was, and the door bounced against the wall as he shoved it open. He reached for me, and I fought him, struggling as he held me tight against his body, kicking at him.

“Stop it!” he ordered, and his words only made me madder. His hand was in reach, and I bit it, hard.

“You little cat,” he said, releasing me. “Calm the fuck down.”

“Get out of my room.” I seethed with fury.

He slammed the door shut behind him, closing us into the darkness. My breath was coming in harsh, tearful gasps, and I wanted... I wanted...

I wanted him, God help me. “What do you think you are doing?” I demanded.

He didn’t say a word. He simply moved and pulled me into his arms, his mouth hard on mine.

All I had to do was say no, and he’d leave me. I knew it, knew that it would be forever. There was no future for me with this man I was obsessed with, no happy ever after. But I could have it tonight, one last time.

I was wearing a light sundress, and he tore the buttons down the front. I should have struggled, should have pushed him away, but the feel of him, so big, so strong, so warm, short-circuited my common sense. It didn’t matter that I was furious with him—I reached up and caught his face with my hands, pulling him down to my mouth.

It wasn’t a gentle kiss, a worshipful kiss—it was raw and carnal, and I couldn’t get enough of him, of his arms around me, clamping me tight to his body, of his hungry mouth, of everything I wanted in this life and couldn’t have.

He was hard, and I was wet, and more turned on than I’d ever been in my entire life, as he yanked the flimsy panties off me and then hoisted me up in the air, his body pinning me against the door. Putting my arms around his neck, I held on.

The scrape of his zipper was my only warning, and then he was inside me, thrusting sure and hard and deep as my body welcomed him, my soul needed him, my heart loved him.

Sinking my head against his shoulder, I held on, needing this, needing him. Needing him inside me, filling me, pushing, thrusting.

The unfamiliar position added to the power of his possession, and without thought, I sank my teeth into his shoulder, hard, and this was no gentle coupling. His thrusts were rougher, faster, as I clung to him, the uncertainty of balance an added arousal.

I came, hard, burying my shriek against his shoulder, and he froze in my arms. And then he moved, never breaking our connection, and carried me through the darkened room to my bed, the two of us sinking down onto the mattress.

The sexual frenzy that had controlled us had shifted, changed. Bracing himself on his arms, he looked down at me as he moved, slow, deliberate thrusts that made me shiver in a carnal response. I wouldn’t have thought I could still feel so much after such a bone-shaking orgasm, but everything had changed, the hurry gone, and his kiss was slow, drugging, tender.

I could feel the desire building inside me again, and I knew I was shaking, I couldn’t stop.

His hands were on my breasts, deft, arousing, and I knew that this time, I wouldn’t survive.

I gasped, calling out his name. “I can’t...” I said in a choked voice. “It’s too much.”

“You can,” he growled in my ear, and he slid his hands beneath my butt, pulling me up so that my clit rubbed against his hard length, and this time, there was no burying the sound of my shocked scream.

It was so powerful I felt suspended in time and space, a convulsing entity that had no purpose except to react to the things he was doing to me.

The fierce grip of the orgasm began to loosen just as he sped up, and I held him, so lost in delight that I didn’t know where I ended and he began.

He came, hard, sinking against me, and a last shimmer of response rippled through my body as I cradled him. I had promised myself I wouldn’t cry again, but my face was wet with tears. I loved him, and I’d betrayed him, over and over again.

I don’t know how long we lay like that, his big body covering me, warming me, but I knew the lie had gone on too long. He would hate me, he would walk away from me, but I had to tell him.

He pushed up, still inside me, and the soft look in his eyes broke my heart. “Did I hurt you?”

Wordlessly, I shook my head, but that didn’t reassure him. “I was too rough,” he said.

My eyes met his, and I signed my death warrant. “I’m not Bella,” I said before I could stop myself. “I’m Kitty.” And I steeled myself for his disgust.

But his eyes didn’t harden, his luscious mouth didn’t curl in contempt.

“I know,” he said.