Risky Extraction

Chapter 14

Allyson’s heart was about to jump out of her chest. She was sure of it. The minute she told him, he’d see her differently. She was selfish in letting things go as far as they did. Still, she needed at least one night before she lost him forever.

His words echoed in her head, and she wanted to scream that she loved him, too. She couldn’t remember having feelings so intense, even with Trent. Telling Crash could destroy everything.

“I can hear you overthinking,” Crash whispered against her ear.

It was precisely what she was doing because now that she’d been intimate with him, she felt him touch her and had him tell her he loved her; hiding her feelings would be impossible. When he moved on and found someone else, it would rip her heart out.

“We didn’t do anything wrong, Ally.” He kissed her temple.

She needed to let the chips fall where they may and rip the Band-Aid off. Crash wanted his kids, and she couldn’t give him that. She couldn’t give him the family he desired and deserved.

“You asked me once why Trent and I didn’t have more kids,” she began in a whispered voice.

“I remember,” Crash replied.

“The truth is we did. The pregnancy had a lot of complications, and she didn’t make it.” Allyson blew out a shaky breath.

“I’m sorry.” Crash gently caressed her back.

“I almost died. Trent had to make a decision that changed both our lives.” Allyson dropped her head. “I couldn’t because I was unconscious, and my life was in jeopardy. It was up to him, and he did what he thought was right.”

“What did he do?” Crash asked.

“He saved my life.” She lifted her head.

“Ally, that’s a good thing.” Crash cupped her face.

“Yes, but it also took away something I can never have back,” she sobbed.

“What?”

“My ability to have children,” she choked out the words so quietly she wasn’t sure if he heard her.

Crash’s silence alarmed her. How could he love half a woman? She’d kept this secret for so long it was hard to believe she’d told someone. Her sister and father knew about her losing the baby, but they didn’t know she’d had an emergency hysterectomy. When his silence continued, she was about to get up and walk away when he spoke.

“He saved your life,” he spoke softly.

“Yes, but it took away my ability to…”

Crash pressed his finger to her lips and shook his head. He pulled her until she was straddling his lap, and she could look into his handsome face.

“But you’re alive, and if Trent hadn’t made that choice, Cameron would’ve lost both his parents before he was twelve.” Crash had tears in his eyes.

“I don’t blame him, but you don’t need to suffer for that decision.” She touched his cheek.

“Wait? Is this why you believe we can’t be together?” Crash brow furrowed.

“You said you’d love to have kids someday and deserve to be a dad. I can’t give that to you,” she said.

“Ally,” Crash began.

“No, don’t say it doesn’t matter because it does. You love kids, and you said you wanted a bunch,” Allyson continued.

“Ally,” Crash said again.

“This world needs little Brents running around, and you deserve to find someone who can give you that.” She shook her head.

“Ally.” Brent raised his voice.

“What?”

Crash held her head in his hands and gazed into her eyes. The slight smile confused her; maybe she was seeing things, and he was frowning.

“Even if I listened to you and decided to find another woman, there still wouldn’t be any little Brents running around,” Crash informed her.

Allyson didn’t want to picture him with anyone, but she needed to let him go. She pulled away from his touch as if his words finally made sense.

“Why not?” Allyson asked.

“When I was a teenager, I had the mumps. I got sick and ended up with orchitis, which, as a doctor, you know what that is.” Crash raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, it’s caused by an infection and can affect a man’s…”

He stopped her from continuing. He probably didn’t need to hear the explanation of how a childhood disease caused both his testicles to become inflamed. It was rare, but it happened. It meant there were no chances of little Brents running around.

“You can’t have kids,” Allyson said.

“No,” he admitted.

She let that bit of information sink into her addled brain because if this was true, she’d wasted years holding back from the one thing she wanted. She stared into his eyes and felt a sense of relief for the first time in forever.

“Ally?” Crash reached for her when she jumped off his lap.

“I’ve been fighting my feelings for you because I didn’t want you to be stuck with an old barren woman.” She sighed.

“You’re not old.” Crash rolled his eyes.

“I’m older…than you.” Allyson tried to stop the laughter from bubbling up.

“Okay, I’ll give you that, but still.” Crash chuckled.

“I’m sorry,” Allyson cleared her throat. “It’s not funny.”

“It kinda is,” Crash laughed.

Suddenly, Allyson stopped laughing and stared at him. If he’d told her about this, they could’ve been together. She slapped his arm and put her hands on her hips.

“What the hell?” Crash laughed.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Allyson threw her arms up in the air.

“It’s not exactly dinner conversation, Ally, and you never told me either.” Crash moved toward her.

“I wouldn’t have pushed you away if I’d known,” Ally whispered as he wrapped his arms around her.

“How was I supposed to know that?” Crash chuckled.

“I’ve been so foolish.” Allyson allowed her eyes to take in his handsome face.

“Does this mean you’re going to stop pushing me away?” Crash asked.

Allyson’s eyes moved to his mouth and then back. She didn’t move or pull away from his embrace as he dragged her closer. He lowered his lips to meet hers and stopped before they touched.

“Are you done pushing me away?” Crash whispered against her lips.

“Yes.”

“Thank fuck.” Crash slammed his mouth against hers.

She couldn’t believe they’d wasted so much time and that it took a tragedy to finally reveal the truth. It was as if everything that weighed her down suddenly lifted, and she could finally be in love with him. She didn’t have to deny herself happiness anymore.

They made love again before falling asleep wrapped around each other. She fell into a deep, content sleep to the sound of Crash’s beating heart as she lay on his chest.

Allyson groaned when she tried to throw off the heavy blanket, which made her so hot she could barely breathe. She couldn’t move, and for a second, panic started to build until she opened her eyes and saw the muscular arm thrown over her body.

She glanced at the clock on the nightstand. It was only a little after three in the morning, and she snuggled closer to Crash, but his body heat was bringing on a significant case of hot flashes.

“Brent.” Allyson turned her head.

No response.

“Brent, honey.” Allyson tried to push him back.

The man groaned but didn’t move an inch. As much as she enjoyed being in his arms, she needed to breathe, and his body weight was not helping.

“Crash,” Allyson shouted.

“Huh, What? What’s wrong?” Crash jolted up in the bed.

“You were making it very difficult for me to breathe,” Allyson sat up.

“Did I hurt you?” Crash’s panicked expression made Allyson feel terrible.

“No, you’re very heavy and have a lot of body heat,” Allyson smirked.

“Wait? Did you call me Crash?” He looked at her with confusion.

“Brent wasn’t working.”

Allyson tried to get up to go to the bathroom, but before she could get out of bed, he yanked her back and hovered over her. His eyes scanned her face before he lowered his lips to hers. The kiss was tender and sweet. When he lifted his head, he was smiling.

“I think that’s the first time you’ve ever called me Crash.” He chuckled.

“Don’t get used to it. Brent is much better.” Allyson cupped his face between her hands.

“I love you, Ally,” Brent whispered.

Allyson swallowed the lump that formed in her throat. She’d said the words for years but could never tell him. This was the first time she could tell him how she felt.

“I love you too, Brent.” Her voice cracked as her eyes filled with tears.

“You don’t know how wonderful it is to hear those words come out of your mouth,” Crash murmured against her lips.