19. Cody
CHAPTER 19
Cody
Whisper’s question hung in the air like a goddammed storm cloud. How long I’d been a corn farmer wasn’t a simple question to answer. The lines were blurred, and the truth was a tangled mess of pain and secrets that I’d spent years trying to bury.
I stared into the flames, trying to figure out where to start.
Her gaze bored into me, digging into the shitstorm that had changed my life forever.
“Hey,” she said, her voice was as soft as morning mist yet laced with tangible irritation. “We promised not to hide things from each other, remember?”
Damn. She had me pinned against a wall of my own making.
“I’m not hiding anything. It’s . . . complicated. That’s all.”
Complicated was an understatement. I’d never told anyone about my childhood. Never wanted to, never found someone who I thought would give a damn.
Until now.
She shuffled along the log, drawing closer. “We’ve got plenty of time.”
Her gaze was a cocktail of curiosity and something else . . . concern, maybe?
Turning back to the fire, I jabbed a stick into the bright orange coals on the underside of the log, cracking off hot chunks. “Uncle John is the only person who knows what happened.”
She shuffled closer still. “In that case, I feel honored.”
I huffed. There was no honor in my story, just blind greed and the shitty fallout.
I saw no judgment in her eyes, just a silent plea for me to open up to her. And for some crazy fucked-up reason, I wanted to tell her. I wanted her to know how I’d been trying to prove that I was a good guy my entire adult life. Maybe then she would understand I would’ve never done anything illegal on my farm.
The words swarmed through my head like wasps.
She placed her hand on my knee. “It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me.”
Her comment couldn’t have been more perfect. It was like she understood me, understood my desire to keep my past buried. Yet that just made me want to tell her my story even more.
I took a deep breath, and the scent of smoke filled my lungs. “When I was eleven years old, my dad robbed a bank.”
The admission was like gravel in my throat.
“Oh, jeez. That’s messed up.”
I met her gaze. “Yeah. Before that, we were just a normal family. My parents went to work every day. I went to school.”
My life was defined by that moment . . . before Dad fucked everything up, and after. Though I hardly remembered my life before.
She ran her hand along my leg. “Why did he do it?”
I heaved a massive sigh. “I don’t know.”
She frowned. “Was he a gambler or something? Did he?—”
“Jewel. I said, I don’t know.”
“Sorry.” She released a breath and squeezed my leg.
I stared at the fire, but it wasn’t the flames I was seeing. It was the police who’d barged into our house, searching for the father I loved like he was a mass murderer. I still had nightmares about their brutality, and in some of my dreams, they find Dad hiding under my bed, and I’m hauled off to jail, too.
I clamped my jaw, trying to rattle the bullshit into what was real, and what my childhood memories created.
“Was your father caught?” she asked.
I shook my head, and she inhaled a sharp breath.
“Dad robbed the bank with two other men . . . guys Dad worked with. Just ordinary young, men. Married men. They were both caught right after the robbery.”
“But your dad got away.”
I nodded.
“Was the money found?”
I shook my head.
“How much was stolen?”
“Ninety thousand. My whole life was ruined for a lousy ninety thousand dollars.”
“Oh, Cody. I can’t imagine what you went through.”
“Yeah.” I stabbed the glowing log.
“Your poor mom.”
Groaning, I squeezed my eyes shut and my mind slammed back to the last time I saw Mom . . . face down on the carpet, screaming up at the cops as handcuffs were snapped onto her wrists.
Jewel shifted beside me. “Hey. You can tell me. I won’t judge you, I promise.”
Huffing, I met her gaze. “You can’t make promises like that.” I threw her line back at her.
“Very funny.” Her black eyes brimmed with concern. She tilted her head and in the glow from the fire, she looked even more beautiful. “Cody, you were just a kid. What your dad did is no reflection on you.”
“Yeah.” Tell that to my school friends who beat me up, calling me a thief and a liar. I shook that bullshit free.
She curled her hand over my leg and her touch was gentle, yet it went deep into my soul. I had never known the comfort of a woman. Sure, I’d had women, but that was just sex. I’d never been with a woman who entered my mind. Jewel was doing that. I barely knew her, yet here I was sharing my crappy past. I had no idea why, but it felt right.
“Tell me about your mom,” she said in a whisper like she knew the request was going to inflict more pain.
Mom also had a before and after image in my mind. Mom peeling carrots at the kitchen counter as I told her about my day at school. Mom screaming at the police so hard the veins in her temples bulged blue, and spit landed on her lips.
Jewel’s hand swept down my thigh and rested on my knee. It was such a comfortable move like we’d been reassuring each other for years.
“The bank Dad robbed . . . Mom worked there.”
Jewel shifted slightly and I could almost hear her mind turning over the implications behind that. “Oh, no. Don’t tell me she was in on it?”
“Okay. I won’t tell you.”
“Really? Jesus.”
“Two weeks after the robbery, Mom was arrested for her involvement. Dad had used her keys to get into the bank, and her PIN code to access the safe.”
“Oh my god, what idiots.”
“Yeah.”
“Your mom was convicted?”
“Yep. Sentenced to ten years in jail.”
“Oh, Cody, that’s horrible. Did you see her in jail?”
“Nope. Wasn’t allowed to. She died in there two years later anyway.”
Jewel gasped and reached for my hand. As she threaded her fingers between mine, I recalled the police telling me about Mom’s death. I didn’t cry. They didn’t offer counseling.
Mom and Dad were dead to me long before her death became official anyway.
“What happened to you after your mom was arrested?”
“I was shipped off to Uncle John’s farm.”
A frown dented her forehead. “Did you get therapy? Or help?”
“Nope.”
“Bloody hell. That’s so wrong.” She ran her thumb over my knuckles. “At least you were with family.”
I huffed. “I never knew he existed before that day. But Uncle John was Mom’s brother and my only living relative. He didn’t have a choice.”
“I’m sure he loved having you.”
My mind careened to John’s bloodshot eyes when he’d told me the brutal truth.
“What?” She nudged her shoulder to mine.
Uncle John’s outburst had been like throwing bricks at me, yet his admission had also not been a surprise. He’d never shown me love. I was just there, another beating heart in his life that he was forced to house and feed.
“Talk to me.”
I’d already told her the hardest revelations of my childhood, but I’d become numb to what happened nearly two decades ago. Uncle John’s fight was still red raw.
Jewel squeezed my knee, urging me to talk.
I inhaled deeply and let out a rushed breath. “Just before I saved you from Bruce, I had a fight with John. He told me they dumped me on his doorstep and that he didn’t want me. He said I’d been a pain in his fucking side ever since.” I shook my head. “I worked damn hard for him, making that farm what it was, but he . . . he—” Rage burned in my throat.
“Hey.” Jewel curled her leg over mine and sat on my lap. She cupped my face. “You are the most honest, caring man I’ve ever met.”
“You don’t know?—”
She pressed her lips to mine, silencing my protest and igniting a fire within me that burned deep. Her lips were soft and amazing. Dragging my mind from the darkness and onto the incredible woman in my arms, I probed with my tongue and her lips parted, allowing me to explore the depths of her mouth.
I roamed my hands from her thighs to her waist, tracing the curves of her incredible body. She threaded her fingers around the back of my neck, sending shivers up my scalp and all the way down to my cock.
As I glided my fingers up her back, exploring the subtle ridges of her spine beneath her cotton shirt, she shivered at my touch, and my cock throbbed to life.
Our tongues glided together in perfect unison, and she moaned, adding another incredible dimension to our kiss.
I curled my finger beneath her T-shirt, gliding my hand up her silky flesh and unclipped her bra.
Jewel pressed deeper into our kiss, letting me know she fully approved of my move.
Seeking her breasts, I swept my hand around to her front and wedged my fingers beneath her lacy black bra I’d had the pleasure of viewing earlier. Her exquisitely full breast filled my hand with its velvety warmth and as I squeezed her flesh, her nipple hardened against my palm.
As I caressed her boob, feeling the soft skin beneath her mound, my cock pounded like a jackhammer, straining against my damn jeans.
Jewel curled her hips on my lap, and I groaned. Maybe she knew my cock was so hard it threated to punch right through my zipper.
She drove her fingers through my hair, making my flesh sizzle, and as she cupped the back of my neck, another groan escaped me. The scent of her skin was an intoxicating mix of sweat, earth, that incredible shampoo she used, and something else that was uniquely Jewel . . . so fucking sexy.
Her boobs were amazing and as they slotted perfectly into my palm, I squeezed and caressed and imagined sucking her nipple. I couldn’t remember a moment when I was so alive. And so lucky. I didn’t want this to end.
Whisper eased back, and I feared it was over.
But with her gaze on me, she lifted her T-shirt over her head. She removed her bra and as she tossed it away, my eyes bounced to her glorious tits. Her boobs were divine, plump and perky and dark pink nipples that were the perfect contrast to her gorgeous olive skin.
“Wow,” I breathed.
Giggling, she cupped my cheeks and crushed her mouth to mine. Her hips ground against the bulge of my cock, and if I didn’t take my jeans off soon, I would snap in half.
Jewel ended our kiss and stood straddling my legs, giving me perfect access to her boobs. I cupped her breasts and as I sucked her nipple into my mouth, she arched her body into mine. Caressing her other breast added to my heaven, and I licked and sucked and squeezed until she was panting and trembling.
Her nipples were rock hard, and when I glided my tongue over the tiny little lumps around her nipple, she gasped and gripped the back of my neck, holding me in place.
Lowering my hand to her shorts, I fumbled the button with my shaking fingers.
Her eyes shimmered as she eased back.
I cupped her cheek. “You are so beautiful.”
Her mouth opened like she wanted to say something, but no words could explain her feelings.
“Are you okay?” My voice croaked.
She answered by undoing her shorts and rolling them and her panties down to her ankles. She stood naked before me, and I drank her in, my eyes feasting on the curve of her hips, her amazing boobs, and the triangular patch of dark hair hiding her pussy. This gorgeous woman was a gift from heaven.
I cleared my throat. “I guess that’s a yes.”
She smiled and her eyes sparkled. “Yes, you silly cowboy. I’m better than okay. Are you?”
Her gaze lowered to my groin, and my cock pulsed like she had run her glorious tongue over the length of my shaft.
I was naked in a flash and my cock aimed toward her, hard and throbbing. She ran her gaze over my body, and her eyes seemed to lick my flesh. Jewel’s body was incredible, toned yet still with womanly curves.
Our eyes met, and every nerve in my body sizzled.
“Wow,” she said.
I chuckled. “Come here, you.”
I gripped her waist, pulling her to my chest, and kissed her with a hunger I had never known. She kissed me back, and our mouths were greedy to taste each other.
Her hand wrapped around my cock, and a moan ripped from my lips. She glided her fingers along my shaft, making me harder still. Our kiss was real, raw, and fierce—and so fucking good.
I parted her legs with my foot and as I glided my hand between them, seeking her hot zone, she rolled her thumb over the head of my crown. I just about burst.
Trying to focus on her and not my pounding dick, I drove my finger into her hot folds. Gasping, she bent her knees, put her forehead against my shoulder, and gripped my back, like she was hanging on for dear life.
I thrust my finger into her wet abyss and her insides wrapped around me like a vice.
“You’re so hot,” I whispered in her ear.
I drove into her faster and harder. She dug her fingers into my back. Her body stiffened, and I plunged into her over and over until she cried out and her hot juices spilled onto my hand. Gasping for breath, she kissed my shoulder and my neck, and her body trembled against me.
My cock was so hard it hurt, and I was ready to explode.
Reading my mind, she wrapped her hand around my shaft, and I sliced my fingers through her hair, crushing my lips to hers. As our tongues fought for attention, her hand pumped my cock until I couldn’t breathe.
I cried out as a long, fierce climax tremored through me, over and over, until I couldn’t release any more.
I pulled her to my chest, and she wrapped her arms around me. Closing my eyes, I glided my hands over her back, feeling her warmth seeping into my skin. I tried not to question how I had gotten so lucky or how she could make me feel so alive when we barely knew each other.
Or the one question that dominated them all: would she regret this in the morning?