18. Roxie
Eighteen
Roxie
T imes like now make me happy to have the family I do. Sure, we’ve had our issues and our moments, but I’m thankful. Losing my house and everything I had put everything in my life into a new perspective. I sympathized with others in the worst way due to the worst things. Now, I have this, too. It’s an entirely new type of pain.
But the same as before, I have support.
Looking around the room, I smile at the piled bags. My mom and Mama Judy went through the supplies we have for the families and were able to find me enough to get by. Staying with Max, I’ve learned wearing his clothes is also a new favorite of mine. Plus, I didn’t want them to spoil me in the way they would and give me more than they should. They gave me enough to get by, and I intend to replace everything they gave me.
Max bought me a dresser, and getting it organized isn’t something I’m looking forward to. It solidifies that I don’t have my home anymore. But ultimately, living with him was the best choice for me. I miss what I had. I worked hard for my home, and moving on from it isn’t easy. Such is life, though. Plus, being able to be with Max a lot more isn’t a bad thing—just a new thing.
Standing in my bra and panties, I feel as if I’m intruding. His home is his space; I’m only in it because mine was taken from me. This moment in our relationship was supposed to come later, not moments after we started. We were supposed to have that awkward, long-drawn-out talk about why it’s what we should do. He was supposed to give me all the reasons why. I was supposed to give him the why-nots even though we both knew we’d live together.
Are we moving too fast? Yes, but it’s not because it is what we both wanted. It’s all because of everything that’s out of my control. If there’s anything I hate most in this world, it’s not being in control of my life. Exhibit A: All the fights I’m picking with everyone because they’re trying to control aspects of my life.
Sighing, I do what I need to. I smile as I pull a bag toward me because my family is the best. Mom and Mama Judy didn’t waste a moment getting me what I needed. It’s time for me to stop sulking and start doing. It takes me a moment, but I find something to wear. I need to feel somewhat normal, given my situation, which means going to work in a few hours.
Can it be considered normal at all, though, when I know Max is currently taking a call from my dad in the other room about following me around? I can, I will, and I have told them until I was blue in the face that I didn’t need an escort. I’m okay on my own, but they’re not going to listen. And, as I mentioned before, I hate when others attempt to control my life.
“Rox,” his rough voice makes me jump. I close my eyes as I compose myself. I’m sure he’s doing the same if the tone of his voice is anything to go by. It seems as if we’re both waiting for a fight to come. I’m not one to back down, and yeah, I might jump in before I should.
Like now.
“You and the worry wart, also known as my father, don’t need to hover over me. I can hold my own.” I don’t look at him. I still need to find clothes, and even if this is about to turn into an argument, I won’t be able to handle even an ounce of hunger in his eyes.
“I have no doubt when push comes to shove, you would be on the winning side of a fight.”
I hear him walk further into the room. His hands land on my hips, sending a rush up my spine. More than once, we have found ourselves in this position. Somehow, always with less clothing on. Be strong, Roxie. This is why you didn’t look at him.
“Then why are you guys having me tailed, watched, stalked, whatever you want to call it, by every brother in the club?” I ask him, pushing myself back into him. When my back touches his front, I push my ass back into his crotch. His cock already hard beneath his jeans.
“Because we don’t want you to have to defend yourself,” he kisses my neck as his hands start to roam. “There’s no doubt you can, but we want to protect you. We want to keep you safe. It has nothing to do with your ability and everything to do with our need to protect you. I don’t know if you know this, but everyone kinda loves you.” Max starts to rub himself on my ass, and I can feel him getting harder and harder the longer we do this dance.
“I love them too, but I feel like their time is better slotted elsewhere. I’ve seen some shit in my life and learned the ways to handle it.” I straighten up and spin so I’m facing him. I lay my arms softly on his shoulders, and my fingers dance in his messy hair.
“I see we’re gonna do this the hard way,” Max murmurs. He burrows his face in my neck and slaps my ass before he picks me up and tosses me on the bed.
I bounce back, and before I can react, he’s on me. His body is between my legs, and I automatically wrap them around him. His mouth is on my neck as he pretends to eat me. His growls make me giggle, but his hands digging into my sides make me laugh. I turn my face toward his in hopes I get his mouth off my neck and on mine.
His lips meet mine as my hands come up and cup his face. I hold him to me and breathe him in. His taste on my lips is intoxicating. He pushes his hips into me, and I moan. As I gasp, he pushes his tongue into my mouth. I suck on his tongue, and in response, he pushes harder into me.
“Max,” I gasp his name.
“I know, baby.”
He pulls back onto his knees, wasting no time getting my panties off. I open my legs, expecting him to eat me out, but he surprises me by bunching my bra up and onto my neck. He holds it down, slightly cutting off my air supply. I attempt to breathe, letting out a small gasp, not at all worried about my safety. I know he’d stop if I told him to.
“I bet you want my mouth on you, don’t you? You want to feel me suck on your clit until you’re ready to scream, huh? Want my fingers deep inside your cunt, making you wish it was my cock?”
“Fuck…yes. Yes.”
Max leans down, his eyes darker than normal, “Too fucking bad.”
He then thrusts himself against my center, and my back arches off the bed as his jeans rub against my clit roughly. The pain feels so damn good. “Max!” He sucks on my neck hard before his mouth moves up to my ear. “You refuse to listen, Rox. Refuse to see how much you mean to me. So, I’m gonna show you, baby.”
He pushes down even harder on my neck as he kisses me deeply. When he breaks the kiss, he releases my neck and makes his way down my body as I suck in air. I lose it immediately when his mouth sucks my clit hard.
“Fuck!”
“Shut up, Rox. I don’t want to hear a sound.”
“Are…are you joking?”
He smacks my clit, and I respond with a moan. I never told him before, or anyone really, but I love having my clit smacked. I do it all the time when I play with myself. The shock he was looking for isn’t there, except from him.
“Oh, you like that?” I only nod. I’m not sure why he wants me quiet, and I don’t fucking care. If it’s what he needs right now, I’m going to give it to him. “Hmm, I wonder what else my naughty girl likes. But,” he licks me from my hole to my clit, sucking it briefly before letting go, “I’ll find that out later. Your job right now is to be quiet and listen.”
He was quick, or I was too consumed with him —both, if I’m honest— for me to notice his pants gone. He lines himself up and slams into me. I open my mouth on a silent scream as I toss my head back.
His thrusts get faster and harder. He angles my pelvis just right to hit my G-spot. It gets harder and harder each time for me not to make a sound. But I want to do this for him. I want to listen. I know I’ve been stubborn and haven’t made this situation easy for anyone, but it’s who I am. I’m a fighter. Yet right now, I’ve succumbed to Max. Giving in to what he wants so easily.
He uses one of his hands and grips my chin, forcing me to look at him. His mouth is only a breath away from mine. “Listen to me, Rox. I know you’re capable. But I need to be there with you or have someone there when I can’t. If anything were to happen to you, I would never forgive myself. I’m not asking to control what you do throughout the day, I’m just asking that you stop fighting us on having someone near you. Ignore me and them all day if you want. Just let us be there.”
He doesn’t stop moving inside of me as he begs me to stop arguing with him on this. I look into his eyes, and all I see is the truth behind his words. He wouldn’t survive losing me.
“Okay,” I whisper.
His lips meet mine, and before I know it, he’s taking me to a new level of heaven I never thought possible.
* * *
Hours after Max distracted me with dick, my legs still feel like jello. I’m constantly reminded of it, but I’m not at all mad about it. It’s made the day easier. Max has a way of making me smile, even when I want to shout, fight, or simply walk away. Max gives me so much. It’s not so much a revelation, yet it feels that way, and either way, it makes me smile again.
It was the same smile I had when the man I’m currently working on came into the shop and asked for me specifically. He’d explained how he knew about me learning from Angel before I came here. Word of mouth was already happening, and I couldn’t be happier.
Unfortunately, I can’t find out more. Since drawing up his design, placing it, and getting started, Duncan’s been hovering over us. At times, more close to me. Every time he leans over, he’s closer. At one point, I fake sneezed because I felt his breath on the side of my face.
“So, what made you leave working with Angel and come work here?” my client, Mark, asks.
I open my mouth to tell him the story when Duncan jumps in. “She wanted to learn from the best,” he laughs as he places his hand on my shoulder. I try to shake him off without being too noticeable, but when I exchange a look with Mark, it’s clear he saw me. Thankfully, he drops it, and I feel as if I can breathe again.
“I wanted to be treated like any other artist in training,” I start to explain while I focus on the detailed line work of the piece. “Angel and my father are great friends. I consider Angel my uncle. I wanted to earn my fair share in this world. I didn’t want to be seen as if I didn’t earn my place. I don’t want anyone to think my notoriety is from a place of nepotism.” While true, it’s still the less colorful version of how I ended up here.
“And we’re never giving her back. She’s brought something to this shop we can’t replace.” Duncan chimes in again. I force out a nervous laugh before he continues. “I was thinking that because Roxie here is the link that joins Angel’s shop to this one, we should hold a demo or a charity event with both places.” The way he says it tells me this isn’t a spur-of-the-moment idea.
“I don’t think so. I mean, Angel’s time is fully booked. So many people would line up just for him. Would we really be able to make much, or get much done, if they’re all lining up for him to work on them? It’s too much with security and all that. Plus, if it’s both shops, we would have to go off-site, and the permits are ridiculous,” I say, trying to think of any and all excuses as to why we can’t do this.
“I have a place in mind,” Duncan says before walking away. I don’t know where he went, but I feel like I can breathe for the first time since this appointment started. I smile at Mark before I turn to change the needle to begin shading.
“Is he always that chipper?” Mark asks.
“No, this is new. He’s gotten happier and happier each day I have been here. I don’t know why.” I smile, shaking my head at the thought.
“Maybe he likes you. You seem to have an aura that draws people in.” I know he means it as a compliment, but something about it makes the hair rise on the back of my neck. I’ve never been one to take compliments well. Even ones said with good intentions. This isn’t any different. Add in the fact that I’m working on him, my hands touching him, and his soft smile. I know I’m taking it wrong. Not wanting to come off completely rude because he wasn’t nasty to me, I smile at him softly before I reply.
“Thank you, but the only people I need to draw in are my boyfriend and my family,” I say as I focus on my work.
This uncertain feeling with a man isn’t new. When you grow up the way I did, you guard yourself. However, this complex reaction is new. He only said Duncan may have a crush on me, which fuck, I hope not, and that I have a good aura. Where is the danger in that statement? I’ve been around worse and never reacted this way. It’s gotta be because of everything going on. Right? Or maybe I should only tattoo women after this. I mean, they talk less and usually fall asleep when getting work done.
I can’t deal with this heart-to-heart crap with strangers. That’s literally what tattoo artists do, Roxie. They have heart-to-hearts with the people in their chairs. Besides, he isn’t doing that. He just stated how you come off as a good person. Jesus.
I am here to make art, but my inner turmoil is correct. Artists connect with their clients. And frankly, Mark didn’t do anything wrong. I’m just reacting to what’s happening in my life. Add in Duncan going from super dick to super nice in what seems like the blink of an eye. It’s confusing the hell out of me. I take a deep breath as I rinse out the needles.
“He’s a lucky guy. Listen, do you think Angel would be the only one to bring in people if you do a demo? I know the guy is super talented and has built his brand in the last ten years, but I also heard he doesn’t do much on the circuit. Could you get him out there?” Mark asks. He sounds genuine, but I’m also not the one to judge character right now, given my response not even ten minutes ago.
“His schedule is always so jammed-packed. As far as I know, he’s never done any type of demo before. When he was starting out, his focus was his art, and he never lost that focus. I don’t know for sure, but I really don’t think there’s much hope of it happening.” I give him an apologetic smile as I work on the rest of the shading in his piece.
For a few minutes I’m able to work in relative peace. Mark had only responded how it’s a shame if Angel wouldn’t be down for a demo, but he understands and left it at that. An odd response, but one I was thankful for as I didn’t want to continue with the conversation.
My peace didn’t last long, though.
Duncan’s mood seems to shift back to surly as he makes his way over to Mark and I. The way he drops in the chair tells me he didn’t get his way on doing this demo and taking it off site. I exchange a look with Mark, but no one says anything. Stanford walks in the shop and cuts a look to Duncan who then holds his head a bit higher as he gets up and follows Stanford to the back office.
“Wow, you were right. His emotions are all over the place.” I snort at Mark’s comment when the front door jingles again, only this time, I don’t look up from my shading. I am so close to being done. “Holy shit.” Mark lets out, and I’m now annoyed. I know who strutted into the shop.
“Angel is just here to annoy me. Catch your breath, big boy.” I smile at Mark as I try not to let my emotions rule how hard I press my hand into the flesh of his leg.
I pull back from Mark, set my gun down, and start removing my gloves, but I’m not able to get a word in as an overly cheerful voice beats me to it.
“Angel! Were your ears burning? We were just talking about you and your amazing hands…I mean talent.” Duncan sashays back to my table. Mark shifted himself to give his attention to Angel, and I don’t think I will get this tattoo done today.
Angel grunts in Duncan’s direction before rolling a stool over to inspect the work I am doing and the other ink Mark has all over his body.
“Nice to meet you, Angel. I am a big fan of your work,” Mark says, extending his hand. Angel looks at Mark’s hand without expression, then back at what I was doing.
“Angel, be nice.” I scolded him. He lets out a huff of air before relenting and taking the offered hand.
“Great, you met Mark,” Fucking Duncan. I can’t get a goddamn word in today. “Listen, I tried convincing Stanford to do a tattoo expo. I have a place in mind, and I was hoping you would help get us in some foot traffic. It would be a great place for our girl here to get some practice.” Duncan keeps speaking a mile a minute about everything. I look up and see Angel’s eyes glaze entirely over. He’s not listening to anything Duncan’s saying.
I kick Angel under the table, and his eyes snap to me as I wipe away the last of the ink and blood from the piece.
“Guys, give me and Angel a minute. Yeah?”
I pull Angel out the door and make our way to the side of the building. The same place we spoke the last time. “What the hell is going on? Why are you here?”
“You know why the fuck I’m here. It’s my day to be with you. At least I can play it off as I’m coming in to look at your work and the work the others are doing, and not a single one of them will fucking complain about it. What the hell are you doing trying to have this huge expo?”
“Excuse me, but I’m not trying to do shit. I was trying to get them to get off this idea, but then you happened to be the one that walked through the damn door, and now they’re going to push for it even harder.”
“Well, you can’t do it.”
“The fuck do you mean I can’t do it? Are you still sitting there, thinking I can’t do this job? Am I not talented enough for this?”
“Oh, my fucking god,” he throws his head back as he lets out a breath, “Did you forget that someone is after you? Someone tried to fucking kill you, Roxie. The last thing we need is to be at some huge expo with you surrounded by so many people. We’re doing everything we can to catch this person. That means keeping you safe in the meantime.”
Oh, shit.
I want to be mad. I want to be angry he’s only here because of this assbag that burned my house down, but he just gave me a fantastic idea. I’m tired of being watched and followed. It’s time I do what I’ve told my family I can do, and handle it my damn self.
Hugging Angel, I look up at him as I pull back, “Thanks.”
“For what? I’m so confused.”
“It’s fine,” I tell him as I pat his face and turn back toward the shop entrance.
“Roxie! What the hell are you doing?”
He calls out, but I ignore him as I jog back toward the front door. I hear him mutter, and then the crunch of his shoes follows. He’s too late, though, as I open the door, and all sets of eyes turn to me.
“We obviously can’t do an expo in such a short amount of time, but what if we do a flash sale? We could have it here. Free up the whole day and do it as a fundraiser instead.”
They want to catch the guy, I want them all, besides Max, to stay out of my day to day life. Problem, meet solution. I’m fucking welcome.
Angel gives me a look I can’t quite read. “I see shops promote flash sales online all the time. They do it on a first-come-first-serve basis. Since Angel is such a hot commodity, we can do raffles for him to be the artist while the rest of us grab the next person once we’re done with our current.”
Not only do I help them find the person who is after me, but I can and will use this as an opportunity to show them all what I can do.
“I know my opinion doesn’t matter, but I think this is a great idea. You can raise money for a charity, or for a battered women’s shelter, children’s shelter, or something like that.” Mark says as he approaches me, “Just a thought. But listen, I have to go. I’m going to set another appointment in a week if that’s cool, but I have somewhere I have to be, and I can’t be late.”
“Yeah. Yeah, of course. I’m sorry we didn’t get it finished today.”
“It’s no problem. I’d rather have to see you more, and it is perfect, than see you once and be unhappy. See ya soon.”
I turn around and watch Mark leave. Angel has his eyes on him as well. Once the door is shut, I give Angel a hopeful look. The same look I know is on Duncan’s face.
“I like this plan a lot,” I hear Stanford call behind me. “Duncan, you and Roxie can start making copies of all of our flash art. We will do one and done with the art. Feel free to make new ones too. I’ll look at the schedule and see what day works best to do it.”
“Yeah, man. We can do that. What do you say, Angel?” Duncan asks hopefully. I don’t turn around to look at either of them, though. My eyes stay on Angel. They’re telling him, please do this.
“Thanks for thinking of me and asking me to be a part of it. But my answer is no.” With that, I watch him walk out, and when he sits on his bike, I close my eyes and drop my head in defeat.