Ruckus (Dirty Soul MC: Long Beach #3)

Chapter 13

T hree days. It’s been three days since Ruckus walked out of this clubhouse with that skank, and I haven’t seen or heard from him since. I’ve been trying so hard not to show how mad I am about it but it’s getting real tough.

“Hey,” Finn interrupts my overthinking brain when he sits beside me. “I heard you ran away with the circus while I was gone.” He nudges me with his shoulder.

“It’s not the circus, it’s a travelling show,” I correct him, trying to act normal despite the fact my father killed his. I have no idea why he’s being so nice to me.

“My bad… still sounds pretty cool.” He lights himself a smoke. “So what made you leave here? I always figured you had it easy. Club princess, Daddy's little girl. Life must have been pretty good.”

“Yeah, well you figured wrong,” I bite back. Suddenly I feel under a spotlight, like he’s trying to pry information out of me.

“Relax, I’m just making conversation.” He laughs, resting back on his chair and looking up to the sky.

“You ever wonder how things would have been if you didn’t leave?”

Now I know he’s diggin’.

“I got somewhere I need to be.” I stand up and start heading toward the clubhouse and when Raze’s dad, Vex, opens the door I run right into him.

“I’m so sorry.” I drop to the floor to pick up the photos that I knocked out of his hand and are now scattered all over the floor. I see one of my father, proudly standing outside the front of the clubhouse with all his members behind him and it makes me feel sick.

Davy and a young looking Finn are in the background among them all, and you can see by the looks on their faces which men my father had under his control. I have to believe that what Polly said was true, and that they are all dead, especially if I’m gonna consider staying here.

Seeing the picture brings back all the hate and disgust I feel toward them. I don’t think Aaron or Raze know everything my father was involved in. Something tells me if they did they would be dead too. It goes beyond Cliff Adams, and beyond this club.

“What’s all this?” I place the photo back in the box he’s holding, and realize that all the photos have my father in.

“Ain’t much an old decrepit man can do around here.” He smiles at me sadly. “Raze and your brother decided they wanted any trace of him gone. I’ve been clearing out the stock rooms,” he explains. “Listen, darlin’, I think Cliff was the worst of ‘em, but he was still your father. If you want any of thes?—”

“No.” I shake my head quickly. “I don’t need any reminders of that man.” I quickly barge past him and into the clubhouse, and when I see Saint sitting at the bar I head straight for him.

“I need a ride.” Normally, I would ask him to borrow his car and I’d drive myself, but I know my brother would be furious if I left this club compound alone.

“Sure, I can give ya a ride.” He gets up from the stool and crushes out his cigarette, then moving closer to me he blows his smoke directly into my face.

“Sinner?” I stab a guess

“Still wanna take that ride?” he checks.

“I need to get out of here, can you take me to Alicia’s place?” I’m so over keeping things bottled up and having conversations in my own head. I need to speak to someone, get a different perspective, and I get the impression Alicia won’t judge me, and that I could trust her to keep a secret, or two…

“Sure.” He shrugs as he heads for the door and pushes it open, and I remain still, staring at the place where I last saw Ruckus, wondering where he’s been.

“You comin’ or not?” Sinner calls out, and I quickly shake the man I can’t have out of my head and go after him.

I manage to resist asking Sinner if he knows where Ruckus is for the whole journey. Eventually, he pulls the black van up outside Saul and Alicia’s house and I go to open the door, but he shocks me when he grabs my hand to stop me getting out.

“What are ya doin’? You know the rules.” He narrows those sinister eyes at me.

“What fuckin’ rule?” I rip my hand free.

“I gave you a ride, now you gotta suck my cock.” He looks back at me as if I’m dumb.

“Excuse me?” My eyes widen.

“Sweetheart, you ain’t the president’s daughter no more. You gotta work for these kinda privileges…”

“Sinner… I?—”

“Relax, I’m fuckin with ya.” One side of his mouth raises up into a smile. “Unless of course you wanna.” He tries his luck.

“Thank you for the ride, Sinner,” I tell him, before opening the door and getting out. He wheel spins off as I make my way up the path. I knock on the door and when Alicia answers, she looks shocked to see me.

“Freya, what are you doing here?” She opens the door wider so I can go inside.

“I just needed to get away from the clubhouse for a while,” I admit, looking around the house she shares with her brother, Saul, and really hoping he isn’t here.

“I get that.” She leads me through to the living room. “Have you thought any more about what you're going to do?” I watch as she heads to the kitchen and grabs two glasses, then she fills them with iced tea from the refrigerator.

“Alicia, there's something I need to get off my chest?—”

The front door opens and although I can’t see him, I hear the excitement in Saul’s voice.

“I saw him. I met him, and I held him in my arms.” His voice carries up the hall and Alicia instantly puts down the jug, looking worried.

“Saul…”

“I’m telling ya, there ain’t a trace of Reaper in him. He’s my fuckin’ boy, Alicia… My fuckin—” Saul steps into the living room and when he sees me sitting on his couch he shares the exact same look of worry as his sister.

“I didn’t know we had… Hey.” He smiles at me nervously while Alicia closes her eyes. “Is there any chance that you didn’t hear any of that?” he asks, sagging his shoulders

“I’m sorry.” I smile at him sadly.

“You have to swear you won’t tell anyone,” Alicia begs me when Saul finishes explaining how he was stupid enough to fall in love with the president of the Reapers daughter, then knocked her up. Today, was the first time he got to meet his son and I can tell just from how he smiles that it meant so much to him.

“I won’t tell, but you have to, Saul. You can’t keep this from your brothers, it puts them in danger.” I know how these things work, and if the Reapers find out where Lettie’s baby came from, they will storm the club and leave nothing untouched. “If you explain it to Raze the same way you just explained it to me. I guarantee he’ll understand. How can he not? The man’s clearly in love himself.” I see the way he looks at Peyton. “I’m guessing if she was a Reapers’ daughter he wouldn’t…”

“Technically, she was, but that's a long story and he ain’t a Reaper anymore,” Alicia cuts me off and fills me with even more surprises.

“The Reapers are the enemy, Freya, they killed your sister.” All Saul’s excitement has vanished, now he just looks so torn.

“That’s not his daughter's fault, look at all the people my dad hurt and killed, do you blame me for that?” I question him.

“Of course I fuckin’ don’t.” He shakes his head.

“Then why would Lettie be any different? Speak to her, ask her what she wants and?—”

“It’ll cause a war. They would never just let her go,” he cuts me off.

“The war already started when they killed Willow,” I remind him, and my heart clenches just at the thought of what she would have had to endure before that happened. I didn’t ask Aaron how long Dad had left her there for but I know from the stories I’ve heard that those Bastards would have made her suffer. I should have come back for her, I should have found the courage to run away from Drew and take her somewhere we could both be safe.

“Either way, you can’t keep something like this from them. The longer it goes on, the more of a betrayal it will seem.” I feel like a hypocrite giving out this kind of advice, but Saul needs to do something about the situation he’s in.

“Exactly what I’ve been telling him.” Alicia folds her arms and looks at her brother cleverly.

“Don’t you start, you still haven’t made a trip out to Bakersfield to tell Griller’s mom she’s gonna be a grandma. In fact, you haven’t even told our own parents,” he points out, making Alicia's face turn red.

“Your parents don’t know you're pregnant?” I turn my attention on to her.

“They will have too many questions, then they’ll assume I’m out of my depth and expect me to go home. I am not going home.” She looks to her brother sheepishly.

“Listen, I left my bike at the club, I need to be on surveillance with Vike in an hour, do you girls want me to drive you to the clubhouse or are you gonna hang out here?” Saul stands up.

“Clubhouse.” I stand up too, surprised by how automatic my answer is. I guess I’m not going to see Ruckus if I avoid the place, and I need to see Ruckus.

“Good idea, come on. Peyton messaged to say that Polly’s been baking.” Alicia grabs her purse and we follow Saul out to the car.

Rocco doesn’t seem as welcoming as he usually is when we pull up at the gates. He hasn’t got anything clever to say, like he usually does. He doesn’t even have a smile. I thank Saul for the lift, and when we step through the arch into the yard, I see Finn sitting exactly where he was when I left, only now I'm relieved to see that he has Ruckus beside him. He’s wearing tight black jeans and no shirt under his cut, and it makes my stomach flutter, my pussy pulse, and my heart sink all at the same time. Still I manage to keep my head up as I pass them both.

“Freya,” he calls out my name and when I turn around and see him coming toward me I feel myself starting to panic. Saul and Alicia continue heading inside, and when Ruckus throws a look at Finn, he clears his throat and quickly follows after them.

After he does a quick scan of the yard to check we’re alone, Ruckus grabs my arm and drags me over to the wall.

“Nothing happened the other night between me and Trin.” I can see he’s finding the admission awkward, and as much as I appreciate hearing it, I don’t understand why he feels the need to tell me.

“And you're telling me this, why?” I decide that after three days of radio silence he deserves a little attitude.

“Freya, don’t—I’m tellin’ ya because I want you to know. Nothin’ happened.” He seems frustrated at me, but then he always is.

“Ruckus, I really don’t think it has anything to do with me.” I go to move on, but he forces me back. “I saw your face, you looked hurt. I didn’t like it.”

“Where have you been?” I ask him, refusing to confirm or deny if he’s right.

“I’ve been avoiding you.” His voice turns soft as he laughs at himself.

I don’t expect him to be so honest, so I have no comeback.

“And now?” My lips automatically rub together when I imagine them touching his.

“Ruck,” The door suddenly opens and Saul interrupts us. “Raze wants everyone at the table,” he informs him, and Ruckus nods his head to let him know he heard him before looking back at me.

“I gotta go.” He smiles sadly before rushing in after him, leaving me flustered, frustrated, but most of all relieved.