Ruined Wolf: A Paranormal Why Choose Romance (Claimed by the Sea Wolves Series Book 2)

CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR

The wind was wild out here on the open water, ripping through me as I steered the boat, punishing me with its unrestrained fury. The waves thrashed against the side of the boat, tossing it about like a toy in a bathtub, but I held my ground and kept her fairly steady, my grip on the wheel unrelenting.

The weather was too rough to chance a sail. I was pissed, but I hadn’t lost my mind. There would be time before the worst of the storm hit. The radio reports had said it would be another couple of hours at least, so I ignored the sheets of rain that lashed me from all angles, soaking me through. I hadn’t even bothered grabbing a waterproof jacket. I’d only had one thought on my mind, and that was getting away, getting onto open water, and finding that calm the sea always brought me. This time, however, there was no such respite, no reprieve from the relentless tempest that raged inside me and threatened to swallow me whole.

Pain racked me, and tears mingled with the rain as I screamed my rage and grief into the wind. Agony and despair mingled together, boiling over into a storm of emotion that surged through me like a raging wildfire.I had come so close to being happy. I had my mate, I was going to be alpha, and we were going to have a baby, and then, in a blink of an eye, it had been ripped away. In one moment, I’d lost everything, even my brother. I thought I’d already come to terms with losing him. After fourteen months of no contact, I’d had to accept that he was cutting us off completely and that he would never return to Desolation, to his family, but it would seem that I hadn’t completely given up hope, and this final loss hurt worse than anything I could imagine. Part of me wanted to rage at him for leaving us, for not being here, and another part just wanted to weep for the loss I felt. I felt so frustrated and angry knowing he’d been so close, and yet died away from his family, in pain and alone—no, not alone.

Nova had been there. Nova. Her image swam into my mind, and I saw her moonbeam hair and golden eyes, but I banished the memory. She’d been there, she’d known everything and told us nothing. Her betrayal had been a knife in my heart. I couldn’t believe it, hadn’t believed it, until she’d confirmed it herself. She’d played us, played me, from the beginning, a puppet master pulling the strings of fate in a cruel game of manipulation.

I scrubbed at my face where I’d once bore her mating mark. It had faded when I’d claimed her as my mate, but I could feel it now, like a burning brand on my skin that bound me to the woman who’d schemed and manipulated and betrayed me. I hated her with every fibre of my being... and I loved her, too, just as much. My heart was breaking from the loss of my brother and her, or at least the woman I’d thought she was. I felt utterly broken and completely ruined by her betrayal.

I replayed every moment in my mind, every conversation, every look, and every touch, searching for the answers to the questions that burned inside me. How hadn’t I seen it? How had she made me so deeply and foolishly in love with her? How could I have fallen for it? An intense wave of self-loathing crashed over me, and my wolf howled within me, enraged and desperate to shift and run until his legs gave out and he could finally escape from the pain that tore through my gut. I stayed, though, letting the wind and rain pelt my face, watching as the sea stretched out endlessly before me. I wanted to jump into my boat, sail straight into the eye of the storm ahead of me, and never look back.Maybe we’d get through it, and I could just keep on going and leave this damn island and everyone behind. Why shouldn’t I? Jaxon fucking had. He’d pissed off and left us all, so why couldn’t I do that?

I took a deep, shuddering breath, knowing I never would. I would never abandon my pack or my brothers. I had once thought Jaxon was the greatest role model a boy could have. I’d loved him, worshipped him even, we all had, but now, everything had come to a head, and I realised I didn’t know him at all. I couldn’t even try to think about what Nova had said about Ethan working with Caleb, and how Jaxon was trying to stop them somehow. I didn’t have the brainpower at the moment. Maybe when I was calmer, but right now, I just wanted to scream into the wind until I was too exhausted to even feel.

No, what I really wanted was to turn this boat around and go find Nova. I craved her like a raging fire. I wanted her in my arms with her nails raking down my back, and her hot, slick pussy sliding down over my cock. I wanted to see that look on her face as I slammed into her and hear her screaming my name as she shattered beneath me. I wanted to feel myself knot her, to feel my cum filling her, and mark her as mine, branding her with my essence, even if she couldn’t conceive right now. I wanted her beneath me, begging for more as I fucked her so damn hard. I wanted her badly, and I needed her like fucking oxygen, but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t take her back, not after everything… if she even wanted me to begin with.

I didn’t know how much was a lie and how much was the truth, or if anything had been true. Had her entire story been faked? I didn’t think so. She would have to have been an amazing actress, but then again, maybe she was, because she’d even fooled Lucas.

The waves rose higher and higher like an angry sea monster, slamming against the side of the boat and flooding the deck with a freezing deluge that soaked my legs.A beat of common sense managed to pry its way through my chaotic mind, and I realised that whatever was happening around me, this storm was about to hit, and I needed to get back to the harbour before it did. Staying out here would be suicide, and however bad things were, I wasn’t going to give up now. This betrayal could have fucked Lucas up so badly he might be impossible to reach now, and Asher... I winced, thinking about him as I began to bring the helm around. Asher had adored Jaxon, and Nova too. He’d need me. I didn’t know how much strength I had left to give, but whatever I had, I wouldn’t deny him.

There had to be a way out of this, even if I couldn’t see it yet. I took a breath, and then bit my lip as a wave of nausea washed over me. Sea sickness had never affected me before, but I supposed this weather was pretty extreme. I ignored it and spat over the side, trying to rid myself of the strange metallic taste in my mouth.

“Fuck!” Another almighty wave hit the boat, and it tipped, my feet sliding against the deck as I hung onto the wheel to keep myself upright. I had just righted myself when another one hit, and I realised that the reports had underestimated the speed of the approaching storm.

The frothy sea pounded higher and higher as the ominous clouds rolled in, taunting me in the darkness. Logic managed to break through my fear, and I realised that if I stayed out here, I’d meet an icy, watery death. I was already soaked to the skin.

I squinted through the water, trying to see the way ahead. I had to get back to the harbour now, or I was in serious fucking trouble.

I leaned on the wheel, trying to steer her towards the islands. Another wave hit, tilting the boat dangerously to one side. I tightened my grip and braced my feet against the wooden deck, gasping for breath as water sprayed into my face. The sea beneath me was dark but writhed under white froth like some kind of creature, spilling ruthless white foam over the bow as the hull creaked under the strain. The waves were now well above the gunwale, and the boat plunged down into the next trough before another wave crashed into the side. I held on, waiting for the boat to right itself again. As soon as it did, I darted forward, snatching up a harness and rope from just in front of the wheel. It took a few seconds to strap myself in, and I tightened the rope just enough to let me move about the boat while also keeping me on board.

It wasn’t long before the harness was tested. I had barely finished fastening it when I looked up and saw another wave crashing down, this one well over my head. I reached for the wheel again, but I didn’t get there in time, and the water hit me with enough force that it slammed me back against the mast. I felt a sudden, agonising pain in my shoulder as I hit it hard and screamed. Water filled my mouth, and I coughed and spluttered, falling to the deck as the wave drained away. I grabbed for the wheel with my right hand, my left arm hanging uselessly at my side. My shoulder was dislocated, and I couldn’t use it. Fuck, fuck, fuck.

My muscles screamed as I dragged myself around the wheel, standing again and catching hold with my right hand before pulling the boat around until I was finally pointing in the right direction. The rain felt like bullets, hard and fast and relentless. It pounded against my body and felt like it was piercing my skin, razor-sharp and scratching. My entire world was reduced to a view of the sea and the sky. There was no land, no horizon, just a vast ocean in all directions. Finally, I just about made out a dark smudge on the horizon where Desolation lay, and I tried to keep her steady, aiming straight for it. The pain in my other arm was unbearable, but that would be nothing compared to the pain of drowning. Wave after wave battered me relentlessly, and I desperately tried to blink away the saltwater dripping from my face, unwilling to let go of the wheel for fear of being thrown off course.

The vessel rocked violently from side to side, and it became a constant challenge to just keep my footing. I risked a glance back behind me. The storm seemed to follow me like some kind of sea monster, chasing me no matter how fast I opened her up. The waves looked like towering walls of water, and it became hard to tell where they ended and the rain began.

I watched in awe and terror as another wave reared up just underneath the hull, freezing as I realised that there was no more I could do. I was completely at the mercy of the storm and whatever gods might be watching over me. The boat rocked as it was carried high in the air, and I gripped the wheel hard, staring down at the chasm below me. The wave broke, and I felt the boat drop, my feet leaving the deck as it plunged downwards.

My hand was wrenched from the wheel, and the coarse harness cut in painfully as it tightened, my only tether now and my last chance for any kind of safety. The boat hit the water’s surface, and moments later, I hit the deck hard. I screamed as I felt my leg snap under me, the sound stolen from me as the storm raged on. The boat teetered on its side, and I had a glimmer of hope that I’d make it, but with a deafening crack, I watched in horror as the mast snapped and fell, the heavy sail dragging the boat sideways, and she finally tipped and went over. With no time to think, I was dragged into the icy depths by the rope that had been my only lifeline.

I panicked, frantically trying to take a breath before I was pulled under, but spray filled my mouth, and I coughed. I was sucked underneath the completely capsized boat, and I was still tied to the deck. If I didn’t want to drown, I needed to cut myself free. I had no oxygen in my lungs, so I had to work fast, but with a dislocated shoulder and what felt like a broken leg, I didn’t hold out much hope. I felt inside my pocket for the knife I always carried and carefully pulled it out, holding it tight in case I dropped it.

The thunder echoed like a beast roaring in the sky above, and although the deafening sound of the storm was muted underwater, I could sense the power of the onslaught. The lightning illuminated the shapes around me, and I moved myself farther away from the deck, trying to get the rope taut to make it easy to cut. Pain surged through my leg and shoulder, and I gritted my teeth, desperately sawing at the rope. My lungs were already burning, and I could have cried when I finally managed to slice through it. I felt a wave of elation and relief, and then drifted up a few feet before realising my mistake. The boom swung around as another wave hit the hull above, cracking me across my head, and my vision blurred for a moment.

I felt sick to my stomach, and I needed air. I grew weaker, and the icy water numbed my limbs, making them feel heavy. Darkness pressed in from all around, and for one despairing moment, I considered willingly giving myself up to the depths. I closed my eyes, and my brothers’ faces swam into my mind, each etched clearly like a photograph in my mind. Love filled my heart as I realised I’d never see them again. They faded away, and another face took shape—Nova. I reached out into the dark abyss, as though I could touch her silky hair. Down here, in the darkness, with death close by, I could forgive her for anything if I could just have one more moment in her arms.

“Come home,” she pleaded with me, her words sharp and clear in the air, more powerful than the fury of the storm. “Come home...”