Twenty-Three
Jace
The strong scent of buttermilk pancakes assaults my nose and I sit up in bed, stretching my arms. The blanket lowers to my knees with one shove of my hands and my bare feet come in contact with the cold floor.
Pans bang together downstairs and I stand up, searching for my jeans. After throwing on enough clothes and running my fingers through my hair, I follow the alluring smell downstairs to where Nate is flipping pancakes on a large skillet while swinging his hips from side to side in the firefly pajamas I didn’t think he still owned.
They look better on him now than they did when he used to sneak into my bed during the first weeks of summer. Something I didn’t think was possible. He fills them out well with his thick hips, round ass, and slender waist. His bare back is on full display, an array of freckles scattered along his fair skin.
What a damn sight he is, and it’s all for me today. Dread quickly fills me when I remember Glen gets to have this whenever he wants, because Nate is his now and will never be mine again. I can look but I should never touch, though I doubt I’ll be able to stop if I ever get that close to him again. Actually, I know I won’t.
Him getting out of bed this morning before me was a blessing. I was too much in a daze, drunk on sleep, to wrap my arms back around him. To memorize myself with his body again and ask him to help me make the world spin for old times’ sake.
His sweet voice lulled me back to sleep and the nightmares faded away, and all I felt was him. I forgot how wonderful it was to feel his warm body pressed to mine. To feel his face nudge against my neck like no one else was meant to fit with him this way but me.
It isn’t until I get closer that I notice the earbuds in his ears as he plates the pancakes, singing “Wannabe” by the Spice Girls at the top of his lungs. He turns his head enough to spot me behind him and his body stiffens, a beautiful blush creeping over his cheeks.
“Morning,” he says, yanking the earbuds from his ears.
“Don’t stop the dance and singing party on my account.”
Lowering his head, the pink on his cheeks spreads to his chest. “I’ll be happy to continue it if you join me.”
“I don’t know, watching was much more fun.” I flit my gaze up and down the front of his body, unable to help myself. I can look but I can’t touch. If I repeat those words to myself enough, maybe I’ll keep listening. He’s so damn tempting, though. And judging by the smirk playing on his lips, he’s well aware.
“Well, as much as I love putting on shows for all my beloved fans, we have a showing to get to at one o’clock, and you sleeping in so late is kind of putting us behind.”
I search the time on the stove, eyes bulging. “It’s already past ten? How?”
“I’m guessing you’re not getting enough sleep at the farm. Sit, so we can devour these pancakes and get ready.”
I pull out and then stop dead in my tracks. “Wait . . . What showing? What are you getting me into today? Do you not have to work?”
“Nope,” he says, excitement raising his voice as he sets our breakfast on the table. Our plates sit mere inches from each other and he walks around the corner to sit next to me. “I took the day off and rescheduled my two appointments for Monday. Oh, and I bought us tickets for the dollar theater. It’s not the drive-in but they are playing Texas Chainsaw Massacre . They play a lot of older movies every Friday.”
“Which one?” I take my seat next to him and he shuffles closer to me, scooting himself over further when I try to add more distance between us.
“Um . . . the latest one I think.” He stabs his fork into his food, pressing his thigh to mine. I give up trying to move away, and settle against him, feeling as satisfied from the closeness as he looks when he wiggles beside me. “I think it’s called Leatherface .”
“Oh. Like when he’s younger, or whatever.”
“Yeah. I haven’t seen it yet.”
“I figured as much.” I scoot my plate closer to me as I drown my pancakes in syrup. “You did say you hadn’t seen any horror films since college, and there’s actually a movie after it that came out in 2022.”
“Of course you would know. I’m guessing you’ve seen it then?”
“Nah. I don’t watch a lot of movies these days.” It’s not the same without you, I almost say, stopping myself before the words can fly out of my mouth.
“Then, what do you do? Go for joy rides on the tractor? Play corn hole?”
I laugh, licking sticky sweetness from my lips. “No. I mean, sometimes,” I joke, shooting him a wink. “I read. Go for a swim in the pond. Take the horses for a ride. Visit the local book store and fish.”
His eyes light up in wonder. “I’ve never ridden a horse before.”
“And you’re definitely missing out. They really are great animals.” I shove a fork full of food into my mouth and he sets his fork down, leaning on his open palm and gazing at me dreamily.
“You should invite me out to your house sometimes so you can take me. Then I wouldn’t have to miss out.”
“Yeah.” My fork scrapes against the plate as I miss my food. “Maybe after the wedding you can come down with Glen.”
He leans back, eyes pointing down. “Yeah. Me and Glen.”
Eating takes longer than planned with all the talking we do, but once I say the wrong thing, we’re back to devouring our food in silence. Only the clinking sounds of dishes and our soft breathing fills the kitchen as we clean up our mess.
“You want to take a shower first?” I ask, stopping in front of the steps.
“Doesn’t matter to me. You can go. I need to make a phone call real quick.”
“Yeah, alright.” I head up the stairs, hating the devastated sound in his voice. Was it the mention of Glen coming to visit too? He is his fiancé. Why wouldn’t he want the love of his life with him when he travels? Glen being there would guarantee I wouldn’t cross the line. Having him there would mean spending less time alone with Nate, because it wouldn’t take long to be alone with him for me to fold.
Steam wraps around me as I turn the water on hot and slide the glass door open more. Shedding my clothes, I grab a washcloth from the drawer, and step into the tub. A shiver comes over me from the cool air following me from outside the shower, and I rush under the welcoming stream, lifting my face under the soft pressure.
A whoosh of cool air sweeps behind me and I freeze when the door closes. I don’t recall it opening—I must’ve been too lost in how relaxed my body felt under the water. Soft footsteps move closer behind me and a hand settles on my hip.
“I thought we could save on water.” Reaching around me, he grabs the wash rag from my hand and squirts soap onto it. With a steady hand he runs the rough material down my back and along my hip. My breaths are loud and heavy and I watch his every move as he slowly gets me clean.
I can’t move anything other than my eyes, my lips sticking together when I try to speak. My cock stiffens when the towel runs over the base, swelling at the tip.
His breathing picks up too, hands shaking now as he runs his hand up and down in agonizing motions.
A moan cuts past my lips, slightly breaking them apart, but the space is too small for words to get through. My tongue sticks to the roof of my mouth, throat dry as he moves to my balls. He presses hard, his fingers touching parts of my skin between the towel.
“We did a good thing today, don’t you think? Saving on water? Washing the extra dishes I left behind this morning when I was running late for work? We both deserve a reward.”
It’s been so long since I’ve had a reward like this. Usually it’s the satisfaction I get from drawing out the pain of bad men—hearing their screams over a course of days and seeing how much I can make them bleed without killing them. I’ve missed his rewards. I’ve missed returning the favor too, and making a game of who can make who feel better. It was always a fucking tie.
His fingers wrap around my cock and he turns my body around, pushing me to the wall. Licking at my mouth, he closes the distance between us and rocks his cock over mine. Our moans overlap and he increases the thrusts of his hips, clasping his fingers around us both, squeezing at both of our bases.
“Nate,” I warn.
“I’ll stop messaging you after you leave Monday morning. I won’t try to visit you or invite you to my wedding. I won’t ask you to come back here or be a part of any more important moments. I’ll marry Glen and learn to love him. But you have to do something for me first.”
“What’s that?” I gasp as the perfect amount of friction burns between us, creating delicious tingles along my skin. Each brush sets my skin alive and it’s hard to focus on his words. I almost think he’s doing it on purpose. Choosing the most inconvenient time to make a compromise.
“Give me what we had before you left . . . for the next two days. I want the chance to say goodbye properly. I didn’t get to last time. It was taken from us. Can you give me that?”
“I . . . You’ll really be okay with me never coming back? You’ll really give me up and try to live your life without me?”
“Yes. But only if you agree to my deal. Only if you can treat me like nothing has changed for the remaining time you’re here.”
“I can do that, and when we say goodbye, that’s it. You go on and live your life with your wonderful fiancé, while I return to the farm.” Without you. My stomach plummets. He says he can do it and sounds so damn sure. He’s giving me what I want. Only, it’s not really what I want but what’s best for him. This is for him, I tell myself again. For him.
“Okay.”
I look deeper into his eyes, getting closer to my orgasm as I chase my waves of pleasure. “You’ll really be able to hold your end of the bargain? No more text messages? Not even if you get the slightest urge to tell me what you’re thinking?”
“Yeah. I’ll get a journal.”
I laugh, tilting his head back and wrapping my fingers around his slender neck as I crash my lips to his. And this right here is for me.
“Come for me, baby.”
Nate let’s go on a cry and I shoot my cum between us right after him, moaning into his hot mouth. His eyes roll into the back of his head, legs wobbling, and I wrap my arms around his waist to steady him on his feet.
“Ready to distract me on the way to the theater?”
“Yes, and I’m ready for you to kiss me in the row instead of me hiding in your shoulder during the scary scenes.”
“I can do that.”
I get him clean and we rinse off under the water before stepping onto the cold tile. Waiting for me on the small rug, he holds his arms down at his sides while I wrap a large towel around him. I kiss him again and we dress in clean clothes, constantly touching on our way to the car.
He’s right, we do deserve a better goodbye than what we got. And this time we’ll get it, because this is something I know I must do for us.