11. Lucas
Chapter 11
Lucas
T he moment I stepped into the room, Logan knew something was off.
“What the hell happened to you?” he asked, standing up from his bed and giving me a good once over. “Why do you look like you’re on cloud fucking nine right now?”
I stared at him, trying to figure out if I should lie or tell him the truth. Either way, I was in big fucking trouble. Not just with him, but with our entire plan as well.
“Lucas…” he said, stepping closer. “What’s going on?”
“I… uh…” I shook my head, realizing there was no way I was gonna lie my way out of this one. “Logan… I think I made a mistake.”
“Mistake?” His eyes narrowed. “What kind of mistake?”
“A big one.”
“Big enough to cost us our jobs and our livelihoods or like you got an STI and need antibiotics?”
When I didn’t answer right away, he took another step closer, poking a finger into my chest.
“Lucas David Greene,” he said, punctuating each word with a stab of his finger. “Tell me you didn’t.”
I looked up at him, shaking my head. “I… I didn’t mean to. But after he saved my life yesterday I just… I couldn’t help myself.”
Logan reached up, pinching the bridge of his nose as he furrowed his eyebrows. “Do you mean to tell me that you’ve gone and fallen for some backwater cowboy when you know full well that we need to steal from him in order to keep our jobs and our livelihoods?”
“We can find other people,” I began. “There’s lots of good food here! I had some tonight that were?—”
“Lucas,” he interrupted. “I don’t think you understand.”
“Understand what? We can choose someone else to steal from.”
“Sure,” Logan nodded. “And then when your little cowboy finds out, how do you think he’ll react?”
I froze up, the truth hitting me like a ton of bricks.
“Think he’ll be happy that you stole from his friends and neighbors to keep your job? That he’ll understand? Because I can assure you, he won’t and neither will anyone else. The moment anybody finds out, this entire town will turn on you in an instant. And if you want to avoid being burned at the stake, you’ll have to leave Sagebrush and your idiotic little romance behind.”
Logan’s words struck me to the core, igniting anger in my belly. “It’s not stupid,” I shot back. “Beau is?—”
“Is what exactly? Nice? Friendly?” he asked, glaring up at me. “That’s the way people are around here. It’s fake.”
“He’s not fake! Not with me!”
“Oh? I suppose he told you how much he liked you back, huh? Then he told his family that y’all were gonna just start dating and have your gay little love affair on the ranch next door. Really do the family proud, right?”
I stared at Logan, fury pounding in my veins. He was making a lot of excellent points, and I hated him for it. Beau just wasn’t ready to come out yet. All he needed was a little time and then things would come out without any big issues. Wouldn’t they?
“He’s never going to tell them,” Logan continued, as if he could read my mind. “The best you’ll ever be for him is a quick fuck in the back of the barn. And unless we get this promotion, you won’t be able to afford to come see him again, anyway. Not that he’ll want you once he finds out what you did to get the promotion in the first place.”
I felt my chest tighten, the weight of Logan's words sinking in. He was right, and I despised it. I slumped down onto the edge of my bed, burying my face in my hands.
“Look,” Logan said, his tone softening slightly at my anguish. “I get it. This Beau guy seems great to you. But we can't risk everything we've worked for on some fling with a closeted cowboy that I definitely watched date women in high school.”
I lifted my head, meeting Logan's gaze. “It's not just a fling,” I said quietly. “I... I think I'm falling for him.”
Logan's eyes widened. “Jesus Christ, Lucas! You've known him for what, three days?”
“I know it sounds crazy,” I admitted. “But there's something about him. Something real.”
Logan sighed, running a hand through his sandy hair. “Even if that's true, it won’t matter in the end. He’s not gonna come out and not a soul in this town will forgive us for stealing from them.”
“They don’t have to know.”
“They’re gonna figure it out,” Logan said, shaking his head. “As soon as that product hits the store shelves, we’re cooked. It might take them six months or a year to figure it out, but eventually it’ll catch up to us and we won’t be welcome here ever again.” His voice lowered as he turned toward the window. “I know my family will never want to see me again either.”
For the first time it dawned on me how much Logan was risking, how much he was willing to sacrifice to keep the both of us in New York with a job worth having. Both of us had been dreaming for years of living in the big city and now that we finally had that dream, we didn’t want to give it up. Not to mention, a significant promotion could lead to better job opportunities at bigger and better companies. This one shady deal could be our ticket to a joyful and prosperous future with the New York elite.
The only thing standing in my way was my crush on a cowboy that I barely knew.
I let out a deep sigh, my shoulders slumping as the weight of the situation bore down on me. “You're right,” I admitted reluctantly. “I'm being stupid. We can't risk everything for... for this.”
Logan's expression softened, and he sat down next to me on the bed. “I'm sorry, man. I know it sucks. But we've got to think about our future here. This job could get us everything we’ve ever wanted and then some. That’s gotta be worth a little sacrifice, right?”
I nodded, trying to push thoughts of Beau's sun-kissed skin and gentle blue eyes out of my mind. “So, what do we do now?”
“We stick to the plan,” Logan said firmly. “We get what we came for, and we get out of here. No more distractions.”
As much as it pained me, I knew he was right. We had a job to do, and I couldn't let my feelings for Beau jeopardize our success. But that also meant I’d have to deceive him and now that I was already in his good graces, it would be all too easy. It almost made me sick to think about.
I nodded solemnly, my heart heavy with the weight of what I had to do. “Alright,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. “I'll do it. But... I… I just need a moment to process all of this.”
Logan gave me a sympathetic pat on the shoulder before standing up. “Take all the time you need. I'll be downstairs if you want to talk.” With that, he left the room, closing the door to our shared room softly behind him.
As soon as I was alone, I collapsed back onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling fan spinning lazily above me. The events of the past few days played through my mind like a bittersweet montage - Beau's shy smile when we first met, the electricity that sparked between us when he held me in his arms after saving me, the way his blue eyes lit up when I kissed him the first time.
And then there was tonight. The time we’d spent together at the fair was beautiful, more so that I could’ve possibly imagined. He’d shown me all the best food spots, we went on rides together, and his family treated me like I was one of their own. Of course, there was that moment where he almost lost his cowboy hat on the tilt-a-whirl and I caught it just in time, jamming it on my own head. He just laughed, telling me it looked good on me. I’d never felt so amazing.
Our heated moments in the truck before the fair came back as well. Beau had not only given into my touch, but he’d let me be his first experience with another man. It was just a blowjob, but for some reason it made me feel… special. And the fact that he’d returned the favor, making sure I was satisfied as well. That said so much about what it might be like to date him… to spend a life with him.
But all that was gone now. It had to be.
I closed my eyes, trying to push away the flood of emotions threatening to overwhelm me. I couldn't afford to dwell on what might have been. There was too much at stake, too much I'd worked too hard for to lose now.
With a heavy sigh, I pushed myself up off the bed and walked over to the window. The Texas night stretched out before me, stars twinkling in the vast expanse of sky. Somewhere out there, Beau was probably getting ready for bed, unaware of the betrayal I was planning. A betrayal he didn’t deserve.
My stomach churned with guilt. How could I do this to him? To his family? To this entire town that had welcomed me with open arms?
But then I thought about New York. About the life I'd worked so hard to build there. About the future that Logan and I had dreamed of for so long. Could I really throw all that away for a man I'd only known for a handful of days?
I pressed my forehead against the cool glass, closing my eyes once more. I stood there for a long moment, my breath fogging the window as I wrestled with my conscience. The weight of my decision pressed down on me, making it hard to breathe .
Suddenly, my phone buzzed in my pocket. With trembling hands, I pulled it out and saw a text from Beau. I’d completely forgotten I’d given him my phone number before we left the fair.
Beau: Hey city boy. Can't stop thinkin' about you. Sweet dreams.
My heart clenched. I could almost hear his deep, drawling voice saying the words. I imagined his shy smile as he typed out the message, probably blushing as he hit send.
Before I could stop myself, I typed back.
Me: You too, cowboy. See you tomorrow?
His reply came almost instantly.
Beau: Wouldn't miss it for the world.
I stared at the screen, my vision blurring with unshed tears. How could I go through with this?
But I had to. And that was all there was to it.