Chapter 10
Hardin stood near the end of the indoor range in only a loose black t-shirt, his tattooed arms flexing as he aimed his weapon down his lane at the target. He fired two shots, and I followed their trajectory, squinting to see two perfect bullet holes in the chest of the paper practice target.
Iwished he didn’t have to see that painting. Even ruined, I had no doubt the death in my eyes would’ve still been visible. Maybe the blood on my cheeks. AndI know for a fact I didn’t ruin the moth eating away at my mouth.
Iwanted to go to him. Explain. ButI didn’t know what to say.
Itwas all compounded by the fact that I really needed to figure out how to tell them about Aodhán. Part of me didn’t want to at all. As much as I knew I couldn’t trust him, I knew he was being honest when he said he didn’t want to see me hurt. What good would telling them even do? Make them even more stressed out?
Eliminatethe tiny bit of freedom I did have?
Itwould change nothing.
Fuck.
Regardless, I knew if it were me, I’d want to know.
Soon. I’d figure out how to tell them soon.
Assoon as I knew how to fire a gun properly and they didn’t feel like I was some helpless kitten in need of rescuing every goddamned second.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” Damien asked, and I realized we weren’t here alone. Damien and Zade were in the first and second lane with an array of weapons spread across each of their tables.
Kalebhefted a black duffel bag onto the table next to the third laneway and the heavy metallic rattle and thud of its contents could only be one thing. Guns. Lots and lots of guns.
“Becca’s learning to shoot,” he explained as he unzipped the bag and began to set out its contents on the scuffed stainless steel tabletop. Eachknock of weapon hitting steel felt like another nail in my coffin. I had no idea what any of them were. What kind of bullets they took. How to load them. Unload them. Where the safety thingies were.
Ifelt like a fucking fish out of water, drowning in the air.
Damien’sburning blue eyes slid to me, a question in them. “Is that right?”
“You got a problem with that?”
Damienlifted his hands. “None. As long as that’s what she wants.”
“I do.”
Henodded. “Alright.” He set his weapon down, coming around to our lane to see what Kaleb brought. I wished he would go back where he was. Or better yet, leave. I didn’t need more witnesses here to watch me make an absolute fool out of myself. It was bad enough I needed Kaleb and Hardin here to train me.
Damienpicked up and replaced a few of the weapons. “Didn’t realize you boys had so many up at the house.”
“Okay,” Kaleb said with a laugh laced in sarcasm. “Have you seen Ma’s tool bench lately?”
Damien’ssucked air in through his teeth. “Yeah. She’suh?—”
“Got enough firepower in there to level California?” Kaleb finished for him and not for the first time I remembered to tread lightly where SloaneSt. Vincent was concerned. The woman tolerated me, but that was about it. I was a tiny bit worried that if I breathed wrong in her airspace she might decide to cut the weakest limb right out of her family tree.
Couldn’tblame her, though. Finding out your husband had a secret daughter—even if it was before they ever met—couldn’t feel great.
“Damn close,” Damien agreed.
“Here,” Kaleb said, tossing me a little baggy of orange earplugs and a pair of clear safety glasses. “Put those on.”
Ifelt like a clown, but I did what he said, stuffing the giant earplugs in my ears. I noticed Damien and Zade had some in as well and felt less stupid.
Damienhefted what I would call a medium sized handgun from the arsenal Kaleb was still setting out on the table. He held it out to me. “Try this one. It’s what Sloane uses.”
Idropped my purse on the floor near the table and took it from his outstretched hand with what I hoped looked like confidence. UntilI realized the business end was pointed up at him and dropped it to the floor, my jaw clicking shut.
Damiensmirked. “Well at least you know that end does the firing.”
“Ha. Ha,” I mocked.
“Come on, get into the lane.”
Allright, apparently we’re just going for it.
Hardinstopped firing at his target and even though I didn’t look, I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel all their eyes on me. My stomach soured as I took up the spot over the X taped into the floor, boxed in by two half partition walls with plexiglass tops.
“Like this?” I asked, trying to widen my stance.
Kalebshouldered past his dad, grabbing my hips to angle me better, squaring me up to the target. “That one’s gonna kick,” he warned me. “Use two hands and lock your shoulders.” He tapped the back of my left thigh. “And keep this leg strong.”
“Just let the girl shoot the damn gun,” Zade chastised Kaleb, but I could tell from his tone he was mostly playing.
“Safety?”
Thistime Damien came up beside me. He lifted my hands and the weapon in them to eye level and tapped the little switch on the side to show me where it was. “Live,” he said, flicking it to the right. “Safe,” he said, flicking it the other way.
“Got it.”
Hestepped back.
Iflicked the safety off and rested my finger on the trigger, shouting as it bucked in my hands and a resounding bang filtered past the plugs in my ears.
Kaleblaughed and I swung my head back to glare at him. He held his breath, cheeks puffing out like an ape.
“Lesson one,” Damien said, clearing his throat. “Your finger doesn’t touch the trigger until you’re ready to fire.”
Kalebput his fist to his mouth. The jackass.
Iwinced, realizing my wrist hurt from the kickback. Another few inches and I’d have likely hit myself in the face with the thing.
Hencethe safety glasses.
Ididn’t dare look at Hardin to see his reaction to my complete and utter uselessness in this area.
Itook a deep breath and turned, resolving to try again.
Thistime, I rested my finger next to the trigger as I brought the weapon up, feeling fire in my back thigh as I engaged the muscles there and in my shoulders. I aimed, trying to see down the tiny sight, using the barrel as if it were a giant pointer. I knew I was taking way too long, but I tried not to let myself care about what anyone else in this room thought.
Ineeded to do this. I needed to be good at it.
Butfuck why was this thing so heavy? My triceps protested the weight of it and my wrists started to feel stuck and aching.
Iheld my breath and fired.
Iwas prepared for the kick this time, but it still twinged in my wrists.
Iscanned the target for my bullet hole but couldn’t find it.
“Well you hit it. That’s a good start,” Kaleb said somewhere behind me.
Ilooked harder and found he was right. I had hit it. The upper right corner of the paper was missing. About as far as a human being could possibly get from hitting anywhere meaningful on the target without missing it entirely.
“It’s too heavy for her,” Damien said and I let him peel the gun from my hands, replacing it with another. “Try a few more. You’ll find one that feels right, just remember Rome wasn’t built in a day. Kaleb was a piss poor shot for years. You’re already doing better than he did on day one at the range.”
“Thanks. She totally needed to know that.”
“We’re off, boys,” Damien said and he and Zade went back to their lanes to start collecting and putting away their weapons. “TheJackals wanted a face to face.”
“What for?”
“They want it from the horse’s mouth that we’re not going rolling over and playing dead. ApparentlyPope’s word wasn’t enough.”
“Careful.”
“Don’t worry, your Ma’s comin’ with.”
Andthere it was. I wanted that. As soon as Damien told his son that his mother was going with him, Kaleb visibly relaxed. Because his mom handled shit. He knew that his Mom had his Dad’s back just as much as he had hers. That the two of them together couldn’t be taken down easily.
LikeAvaJade and her Crows.
Theymade each other stronger. Not weaker.
Iturned back to the target with the new weapon. It was light, but the grip felt awkward in my hand. It only took me a second to find the safety switch this time before I refound the right stance, took aim, and fired.
Iwent through six different handguns before I found one that felt right. I managed to hit inside the first ring on the outside of the target twice with it by the end of an hour of shooting, which was much more than I managed with any other gun.
Theylet me shoot a bigger one, too, a machine gun. That didn’t go well. I damaged some plexiglass and the wall had bullet tracks in it going fifteen feet up toward the high warehouse ceiling. We decided to wait until we could go out to the desert to try that one again.
Iwas trash with the sniper rifle, too, but he said I could try again in the field. That the range wasn’t the best place to practice with that.
Igot excited when they brought out some blades that looked similar to AvaJade’s but all I managed to do with those was cut my fingers and nearly stab Kaleb in the foot.
“That’s it then. That’s your weapon, Vixen,” Kaleb announced as he put the others away. “Want to take a few more shots with it before I teach you how to clean and load it?”
Myshoulders and wrists said hell no, but my lips said, “Yep,” as I turned back to the target, determined to get within the second ring at least once before we had to leave.
Kaleb’sphone started playing a PrimalEthos ringtone and he answered the call on the third ring. I cocked my head at him in question and he mouthed Corvus to me before walking away to find some quiet to take the call.
Iwondered why he was calling but assumed it had to do with the Sons. Damien was still having trouble securing more arms and ammunition. I vaguely remembered Kaleb mentioning that at least perhaps the ThornValley chapter could help with sourcing if nothing else.
Squaringoff at the target again, I squinted one eye shut, trying to line up the shot before firing.
Itmissed the target entirely. Awesome.
Hardinwas already halfway over to me before I’d realized he moved. I bit the inside of my cheek.
“What?” I asked as he approached, his black eyes boring into me.
Hegestured to the target, for me to focus there, so I did, ignoring the heat of him as he came up behind me, adjusting my stance, lifting my arms just slightly.
Mylips parted as his hand wrapped around my waist, snaking up to my chest to rest right against my heart. “Don’t hold your breath,” he ordered.
Ifelt my chest rise against his palm.
“Fire on your exhale.”
Igave a little nod and his hand dropped away, leaving my chest cold without his touch.
Ittook three tries with him there watching me, but I felt the shift. The steadiness of letting the weapon flow with my breath and using the exhale to pull the trigger as if I were the one breathing lethal lead.
Thethird shot didn’t just hit inside the first ring, it hit the marker line of the second. Mere inches from the heart. I knew better than to think I could repeat it, but it was a start—a step in the right direction.
“GuessI’m not as helpless as you thought,” I found myself saying, turning to find Hardin with his lips pressed into a thin line.
“Is that what you think?”
“A moth?” I scoffed.
Heshook his head. “Becca, I called you Hawk because that Death’s head HawkmothKaleb told you about was the most badass—most beautiful—thing I’d ever fucking seen.”
Hiswords hit me like a physical slap and my toes curled against a wave of anxious fluttering low in my belly. He thought I was badass? Beautiful?
Iblinked, realizing Hardin hadn’t stuttered once just then. He seemed to realize it at the same time, eyes widening and then darkening again as he reached out for me, rough hands gripping both arms as he crushed his lips against mine in a feral kiss.
Amoan bloomed in my chest and I felt in his kiss everything else he couldn’t say. His anger at what he found in my painting. His promise that he wouldn’t ever let that image become reality. When he pulled me back, his jaw flexed. I opened my mouth to apologize but no words came out. I realized I didn’t need to say sorry.
Neitherdid he.
“Uh, what did I miss?” Kaleb asked as he came back over, glancing between us. Hardin released me, but didn’t leave.
“You guys finally kiss and make up?” he asked, lifting a brow.
“Yes,” I answered honestly, a wicked smirk pulling at my lips as an idea took root. I went with it, flicking the safety back on my weapon before adding it to the others in the bag Kaleb brought. I hefted the bag from the top of the steel table onto the floor.
TakingKaleb’s hand, I led him past his brother to the table and then lifted myself into a seat atop it with him positioned between my legs.
“Vixen?”
Igave him a look, trying to remind him of his promise. That we would teach Hardin to share.
“No talking,” I ordered, my chest tight and fluttering with nerves as I tugged Kaleb close, pressing a kiss to his mouth. I heard Hardin’s soft growl behind him, but he did nothing to stop us. And he didn’t leave. Kaleb deepened the kiss and I felt his pulse spike against my fingertips on his neck. I felt something else, too. The growing erection in his pants as I wrapped my legs around his middle to draw him closer.
“Vixen, anyone could walk in.”
Ishrugged, letting a hand fall lazily down the front of his chest and past his Adonis belt. “Let them.”
Steelingmyself, I lifted my gaze over Kaleb’s shoulder, reaching out a hand toward Hardin.
Wasthis too far?
Iknew they knew I’d been intimate with both of them, but knowing it and seeing it were two different things. They may have accepted it, well, to a point, but maybe this was too?—
Hardin’slips curled as he spun on his heel and stormed toward the exit.
Ifelt myself crumple.
Kaleb’sfingertips lifted my chin, and I tore my gaze away from Hardin’s retreating back to find his heated gaze fixed on mine with so much unbridled desire it took my breath away.
“His loss,” Kaleb murmured against my lips, and I felt my body respond to him, waking up in a way that felt so. Fucking. Good. Even with the sting of Hardin’s rejection still lingering beneath my ribcage.
Aloud bang sounded, and Kaleb and I flinched, both of us following the sound to the exit door. The exit door Hardin just barricaded with one of the other stainless steel tables wedged against it.
Heassessed his handiwork for a moment, testing for weak points, and then he was coming back.
Hewas coming back.
Ohgod.
Mypulse thudded in my ears as he closed the distance, skin tingling, thighs squeezing tight as that flutter in my belly turned into a heavy ache that begged to be sated.
Iwatched Hardin remove his shirt as he neared, exposing the myriad of black ink painting almost every free inch of skin over his arms and torso. His eyebrow lifted in a wicked half-sneer half-smirk and the tattoo arching over it warned me what was coming in one sharply scripted word: submit.
Kaleb’sfinger trailed down my throat, following the curve of my breast, his thumb brushing over a nipple, drawing a quick inhale through my teeth at the sensation.
“Get her skirt,” Hardin growled behind me and Kaleb started to pull it off. AsI leaned back, Hardin brought his hands around me from the other side of the table, finding the hem of my shirt and easily pulling it from my body. I tried to sit up straight, but he forced me down instead until the cold kiss of steel met my back.
Kalebfinished with my skirt, running his hands up my thighs and over my panties through the sheer black tights covering them.
Hardinslid his fingers that were splayed over my chest to my throat, snatching it up in his fist in a way that made my fucking eyes roll.
“This what you want?”
Inodded, and the pulse pounding in my temples was secondary to the rhythmic throbbing in my pussy as Kaleb hooked a finger into my tights and ripped them away.
Thebrothers shared a look over my exposed body. I couldn’t read it, but as Hardin lifted me by the throat and pressed his mouth to mine again, all desire to decipher it fled.
Thekiss, bruising at first, turned softer as his grip on my throat relaxed, letting me breathe him in. His thumb caressed my jaw and the tenderness in his touch surprised me so much I gasped against his lips. Felt something like tears sting in my eyes.
Thiswas his apology.
ButI didn’t need him to be soft for me. Didn’t want him to be.
Ireached back, finding the hard rock of Hardin’s erection so perfectly lined up with my head through his jeans. I fumbled with the zipper and felt his laugh against my mouth.
Hardinlaughs?
Kaleb’shot mouth pressed to the inside of my thigh, and I jerked, groaning into his brother’s mouth as he swept inside with his tongue to taste me.
Therewas no way I was going to survive this.
Alreadymy fingers were trembling. My breaths coming low and quick.
Icould feel my own wetness in my panties, silky and warm. I cried out as Kaleb pressed two digits to the spot through the silky fabric. Heard the sound of his arousal at what he found there.
“Fuck, Vixen.”
Hejerked my panties aside, and I had no time to prepare myself before he was there. His hot tongue found my slit and I bucked on the table so hard that he needed to wrap his hands around my thighs to hold me down as I practically hyperventilated into Hardin’s mouth.
I’djust managed to get Hardin’s zipper down when my hands stopped working entirely.
“Please,” I managed between kisses. “I want your cock.”
Imoaned, the fingers on my right hand delving into Kaleb’s hair as my body convulsed on the table. The things he was doing with his tongue down there should be fucking outlawed. My vision doubled as I shuddered, reaching blindly for Hardin.
Hardin’stouch slid to my jaw, forceful fingers prying my mouth open as he pushed two digits inside. He slid them over my tongue and I sucked them softly, swirling against their tips in a wicked promise. He pushed them in deeper, choking me with them, testing my limits.
Asmy eyes rolled open I found open fucking flame in his gaze. I gasped for air through the smoke clouding my mind as he withdrew the digits, wetting my lips as he readied his cock with his other hand.
Icouldn’t fucking wait to choke on it.
Iopened wide for him, and he bared his teeth as he dragged me closer to the edge of the table by the throat, letting my head hang a little from the edge as he pushed into my mouth.
Adrop of salty precum met my tongue and I was fucking starving for him. I moaned loudly around his length as he fed himself into my mouth and down my throat, inch by precious inch. Until my eyes watered and my pussy clenched. Kaleb felt the shift and I felt him smile against me.
Whenhe added two fingers to his tongue, pressing them into me, I choked on Hardin’s cock and had the absolute pleasure of watching him drop his head back in a feral groan through watery eyes.
Hewithdrew, hooded eyes dropping to mine. So hard. So hungry.
Ilicked my lips, eager for another assault.
Amuscle ticked in his temple as he positioned himself directly behind me and guided me to drop my head, pressing on the underside of my chin to line himself up.
“Open your dirty fucking mouth,” he said in a rough, husky tone that made me shiver.
Idid as I was told and Kaleb slapped my pussy at the same time his brother thrusted into my open mouth. I convulsed on the table and Hardin leaned over me, pushing himself into my throat to his hilt as his hands pressed me hard into the table. My eyes rolled and when Kaleb sucked on my clit, I couldn’t hold on anymore.
Hardinshoved my bra down and flicked my nipples and I came hard, thrashing on the table, my thighs fighting clamping on Kaleb’s head, my lungs fighting for air as the sensations doubled, tripled, raging through me like tiny napalm explosions until I forgot that I needed air.
“Hardin,” I heard Kaleb say distantly and then there was air and I was gasping and crying out as the orgasm continued to shudder through me.
Quickhands found the back sides of my knees and my legs were pulled back roughly, opening me back up for Kaleb.
Iblinked away the tears blurring my vision to see Hardin standing above me, gripping my knees, holding me open for his brother. As the orgasm began to fade, a smile found my lips.
Hardinheld his cock just out of reach of my mouth, and I looked up at him wickedly, reaching for him above my head.
“Don’t stop,” I croaked.
Hardinhissed as he shifted his hips forward, and I licked the bead of precum from his hardened tip, making him jerk. “Fuck my tight little throat, Hardin.”
“Fuck,” he hissed, thrusting into my mouth as I felt his grip tighten on the underside of my knees.
Ishouted in surprise around his cock as I felt Kaleb resume his assault on my pussy with his tongue, gently prodding my ass with a wet digit as he ate me out.
“She’s so fucking wet for us,” Kaleb said, pushing his finger into me, feeling the tight stretch as I slowly opened up for him. “Oh fuck. I am going to destroy this ass, Vixen.”
Mycore tightened at the promise, and I reached down to touch him as his brother began to move in my mouth, fucking my throat just like I asked him to. Kaleb kissed my fingers as I stroked them down his cheek, and I used the wetness he gave to play with my nipples, earning myself a few curses and groans of pleasure from my guys as they watched me touch myself.
“Relax your throat, Hawk.”
Beautiful.
Badass.
Rightnow, I felt like both things. I felt like everything.
Idid as Hardin bid, relaxing my throat as much as possible as he pushed past the dam at the back of my mouth, hitting that sweet spot that made his fingers bite down into the back of my knees so hard that I knew I’d find bruises there later.
Ashe retracted, I fought for air, swirling my tongue down the underside of him before suckling gently at his tip. I was ready when he thrusted again, throat wide and ready to take him all the way back again.
“Fuck,” Hardin cursed as he picked up his pace, pumping in and out of my mouth with starved, almost frantic movements and I knew he was close already. I was good at this. Almost too good I’d been told and it seemed even HardinSt. Vincent was no match for this mouth.
Igagged on him, choking as he fucked my throat and another orgasm began to build in my core. I panted and whined around his cock as Kaleb worked magic between my thighs, getting my ass fully prepped to take him.
Ifought against Hardin’s hold on my legs as the orgasm crested, stars bursting behind my closed eyelids as I screamed against his cock in my throat. ButHardin didn’t let go, he forced me to stay open as Kaleb wrung every possible ounce of pleasure out of me until the stars bursting in my eyes turned black and for a split second I was outside of myself. Blind with pleasure.
Hardin’sfist closed around my throat, bringing me back, forcing another wave of pleasure from my battered body as he roared his release and I tasted salt on my tongue. I sucked greedily on him, not wanting to waste a single drop of his release.
Hereleased my legs and I all but kicked Kaleb off me out of pure reflex to the intensity of the pleasure still throbbing and aching in my core, making every touch, even the lightest brush feel like so, so much. Toomuch.
Hardinlet himself fall from my lips while Kaleb caught my legs, gripping my ankles just above my boots. “Uh-uh,” he chided. “Where do you think you’re going?”
Igasped in surprise as he flipped me over and my boots hit the cement floor. Kaleb took hold of my hips at the same time Hardin bent over the table, taking my chin between his fingers.
Hewatched my face as his brother slid into my ass, as if he could steal the pleasure Kaleb was giving me for himself. My eyes rolled back, fluttering closed as he filled me and my core ached for him to move.
Hardin’sgrip on my chin tightened. “Look at me, Hawk.”
Idid.
Hishard eyes bored into mine as Kaleb’s hands splayed over my back and he began to move, using me as his anchor, pushing me into the table with each hard, purposeful thrust.
“You like that?” Hardin asked.
“Yes.” I moaned, feeling my pussy dripping down my thighs with the proof of my response.
“Is this what you want, Vixen?” Kaleb asked, his voice breathy in a way that was so fucking hot. “You want your Saints on their knees for you?”
“Yes.”
“Harder,” Hardin said, his gaze flicking up to Kaleb for an instant before falling back to watch me. Like each flicker of emotion, of pleasure over my face was consumable. Like it could sustain him.
Maybeit could.
Kalebfucked my ass harder. My thighs slapped the edge of the steel table with each thrust.
“Jesus fucking Christ,” Kaleb growled. “She’s,” thrust, “So,” thrust, “Fucking,” thrust, “Tight.”
Iwhimpered, and Hardin took the opportunity to push his thumb into my mouth, pressing down on my tongue. I sucked on the digit, flinching as Kaleb hit that spot deep inside that offered more than just pleasure but the slightest bite of pain that only added to the growing fire burning in my core.
“Does that hurt, Hawk?”
Inodded, sucking harder.
“Do you like it?”
Ilooked at him through my lashes, knowing the look in my eyes would be answer enough.
Kaleb’sfingertips bit down into my hips.
“You’re so perfect for us, baby,” he said in that heavy, breathy voice and that was it. I let go, shouting as I came. Hardin fisted a hand into the hair at the back of my head, jerking my face up so that he could thieve the sound from my lung with a savage kiss.
“Fuck, I’m coming, Vixen,” Kaleb hissed. His thighs slapped into my ass three more times before I felt the swell of his release inside of me, pushing my climax even higher. Warmth covered me like a blanket as Hardin’s lips left mine, and I felt my cheek hit the cool steel table.
Hardinbrushed the sweat-soaked hair away from my eyes as Kaleb peppered kisses over my shoulder blades, his breath fanning over the nape of my neck.
I love you, I thought and snapped my lips closed, surprise seizing my lungs.
Myheart beat down into the table, echoing the words back to me. Daring me to contradict them.
ButI couldn’t lie. Not to myself. Not anymore.