Chapter 19
Kaleb’s blood still stained the backseat of Dad’s car.
Ididn’t want to leave the hospital, but when AvaJade called I had Dad’s keys and was in the parking lot before anyone knew I was gone.
Shestole their fucking car?
Rooksaid that the camera placed her leaving their place not five fucking minutes after our call in the middle of the night. If she were headed this way, she’d have arrived back in SantaClarita hours ago.
Butshe wasn’t at the hospital.
Andnow I knew she wasn’t at our place, either. I’d damn near torn the doors off the hinges checking every room.
Whatthe fuck was she thinking?
Wasshe trying to get herself killed? Or worse, taken?
Thethings that twisted motherfucker might do to her…
Hawk’sface, pale, with unseeing eyes and a moth over her lips flashed in my mind. A reminder of what could happen if we weren’t careful.
Whereare you?
Whereare you?
Think, Hardin. Where would she go?
Idoubted she came all this way just to make it to class on time for morning so it had to be either Kate and Toby’s apartment or DeathBeforeDecaf. The cafe was on the way. I made a sharp right, blowing through a stop sign. The engine of Dad’s truck snarled as I sped toward the Row.
Itried her again on my phone, calling twice when she didn’t answer the first time.
Fucksakes.
Itried Toby. Nothing.
Kate. No luck.
Ofcourse, there was a third option. Another place she could be. One where I wouldn’t find her so easily.
Shecould be with him.
MyHawk could’ve gone to our enemy. ToSéamas’ son.
ToAodhán.
How long has she been talking to him?At least since the night of the PrimalEthos show in Lodi. I remembered seeing the name on her phone, but like an idiot I fucking forgot.
Andthen there was the worst possibility of all: could she be working with them? Couldshe be the rat?
Itfelt like a betrayal just to think it. Made my stomach twist and heat flare up my back with the kind of rage that begged for release.
CouldI do what needed to be done if she…
Icouldn’t finish the thought.
No.
Igritted my teeth, hands tightening on the wheel. I didn’t think I could.
Itwould have to be someone else.
Andthen I’d fucking kill them.
Thefront right tire bumped up onto the curb as I hit the brakes and threw the car into park, leaving the driver door open as I stalked into DeathBeforeDecaf.
Itwas still quiet this early, but the students filling the seats nearest the window scattered, abandoning books and computers as I stormed to the front counter.
“Kate,” I growled and she turned, dropping a takeout latte with a squeal as she laid eyes on me. It erupted as it hit the floor, splattering her pants and apron with scalding milk.
“Fuck,” she hissed. “Hardin, what the—is that blood all over your shirt?”
“Where is Becca?”
Kate’sblue eyes crinkled. “What do you mean ‘where is she?’” the pitch of her voice heightened with worry. “She’s supposed to be with you.”
Nothere. Fuck.
“Where’sToby?”
Maybehe knew something.
Kateshook her head. “He was supposed to be in fifteen minutes ago.”
Shemust’ve seen something shift in my face because her jaw clenched. “He’s late sometimes, though. I don’t think?—”
“Try calling Becca.”
Kateblinked, her chest rising and falling more rapidly as she shakily took out her phone.
Sheshook her head after a minute with the phone pressed to her ear.
Soshe wasn’t only ignoring my calls. I’d managed to slip my still functioning sim into a gift shop burner at the hospital, so she knew damn well it was me calling.
Butshe was ignoring Kate, too.
“TryToby.”
Shedid, her lower lip quivering as she hung up and shook her head again. “Hardin, what’s going on?”
Ifelt the tremble in my chest that always preceded a stutter and steeled myself against it, tightening my core. “I don’t know yet.”
Quick, short sentences.
“They could be together.”
Breathe.
“Don’t go home. Stay here until you hear from m-m-me.”
Shit.
Iturned on my heel before I could see her expression and left. The glass shattered under my hands as I shoved the door too hard on my way out. My boots crunched over the broken glass, and I was back in the car and driving before the driver’s side door could fully shut.
Theycould be together.
Talkingthrough shit. That was what friends did, right?
Itcould be anything. They could be fine.
Thenwhy did it feel like a lie?
Whydid it feel like someone shoved my heart into a meat grinder and filled my stomach with heavy lead?
Ittook way less time than it should’ve to pull up outside the apartment building, right behind the Crows’ fucking Rover. I nudged its bumper before I could come to a full stop.
Ipulled my gun, checking the inside of the vehicle, but not seeing anything out of the ordinary. My phone rang and I checked my six before answering it.
“Did you take my fucking truck?”
Dad’sheated voice met my ears.
“Where are you, Hardin? I gave orders. No one was to be on the streets alone and that fucking included you.”
“Becca stole the Crow’s car and left ThornValley in the middle of the night.”
Silence.
“Where—”
“I just found the Rover outside her apartment. No sign of her, yet.”
“I’m sending backup.”
Theline went dead, and I tucked the old flip phone into my back pocket, scanning the alley entrance for any sign of life before pushing into the building.
Itwas quiet inside. The soft drone of voices behind the doors of apartments on the first and second floors turned to absolute silence as I pushed past the third floor and stepped up to the landing on the fourth.
Iswept the area, a pounding in my temples as I noticed the door to the apartment wasn’t fully closed. The sliver of air betrayed almost no light. No sound.
Fuck.
Myknees ached with every step toward the door and for one brutal second I wasn’t sure I could go in there.
Butthen the second passed and I pushed the door open with the toe of my boot, pushing in with my gun and head on a swivel, scanning the darkened space.
Thesmell hit me before I saw him and my nose wrinkled.
Histhrifted luxury brand sneakers were the first things I saw, their soles a bright, glaring canary yellow. The color only the slightest bit less offensive than the dark red and mottled pink gore blown out through the back of his skull.
Fuck. Toby.
Hisdeath hit me more than it should’ve, but the pain of it was second-hand. Not mine. This was going to crush Becca. I couldn’t stand the idea of?—
Ihadn’t seen her at first. The way she was slumped over her knees in the dark. Unmoving.
Herblack nail polish, chipped and cracked, looked to be an ever starker contrast than usual against her pale fingers. Pale fingers in pale hands, connected to pale wrists that were zip tied to the back of a chair.
Ichoked, my eyes burning with liquid fire. My throat scraped raw and aching.
Mygun hand lowered and as if in a dream or a nightmare, I watched myself move toward her, knowing what I would find.
Deadenedeyes, glazed with opaque white.
Iknelt in front of her, lifting the curtain of dark hair falling over her shins to push it back over her face.
Alreadymy mind was filled with blackness.
Shadowand blood. Ash and smoke. I would kill every last Son with my own bare hands. I’d tear them into pieces and burn them and drown them and break them until they were nothing. I’d pulverize their bones and scatter them in the wind.
Myfingers grazed her cheek and I stilled.
Warm.
Shewas still warm.
Iwrenched her upright and she came to all at once, coughing and choking, her eyes wide and face covered in dried blood. A fist clenched in my gut at the sight.
“He’s—”
Ipressed my lips to hers fiercely, holding her face to mine, tasting salt and old copper. She tried to pull back, but I couldn’t let go. I wasn’t ever going to again.
Igrunted as she bit my lip hard and the tang of fresh copper filled my mouth.
“He’s here,” she blurted as soon as her mouth was free. “Séamas! Séamas is?—”
Iwas up and spinning. I had the whole place cleared in less than a minute and came back to a softly sobbing Becca in her chair, her gaze fixated on Toby.
Therewere bruises on her collar that made me want to tear apart the universe.
Cutsand bruises over her cheek and brow that had me so thirsty for blood my vision was tinted with the mirage of it, soaking everything in a reddened hue.
“He killed him,” she croaked, and I tucked my gun into my waistband, flicking out my switchblade to free her hands and legs.
“Don’t look at him, baby,” I found myself saying as I pulled her gently from the chair and into my arms. She gasped in pain when she tried to put pressure on her right leg and I noticed the river of blood soaking the hem of her skirt and the skin there.
“We need to get you to the hospital.”
Shejerked out of my grip, falling to the floor, her hands floundering around her friend as her soft sobs turned to louder sounds. Sounds so raw it hurt to hear them in a way I didn’t think I could be hurt anymore.
“I-I can’t l-leave him here.”
“Hardin?” It was Zade’s voice that filled the space. I hadn’t heard him coming over Hawk’s crying. Over the thudding in my ears.
“What the fuck happened here?” Pope asked, entering behind Zade, his eyes filled with horror as he took in Toby and Becca now crouched over him, struggling to catch her breath.
“Séamas,” I said. “She said it was Séamas.”
Andthen I bent low, peeling her stiff fingers from where they clung to Toby’s back. He might have been dead, but she was still alive and I was going to fucking keep it that way. That wound in her leg looked like it was still bleeding. I wasn’t going to risk it. He could’ve nicked an artery.
“It’s okay, Hawk,” I said as she fought me, surprised at the soft tone of my own voice. “Come on, let go.”
Iclutched her to my chest as soon as I got her free of his corpse and she shoved at me but I only held her tighter. “It’s not okay,” she sneered, her voice muffled against my shirt. “Nothing is okay. Nothing is ever going to be okay.”
Myphone rang and I wrenched it from my pocket, not bothering to hide my annoyance as I tossed it to Zade to answer.
Hetook the call, nodding and muttering replies while Becca melted into me, the fight going out of her one breath at a time. When she was calm enough, I swept her up into my arms to get her off the leg.
“It was supposed to be me,” she muttered almost unintelligibly. “It should’ve been me.”
“Kaleb’s awake,” Zade said, coming over to tuck my phone back into my pocket. “I told them you’re on your way and need a doc on standby for the girl.”
Istarted to move and Becca shifted in my arms. “No. Wait! We can just leave him there like that. We can’t just?—”
Zadeput a hand on her arm, making her jump.
“We’re going to take care of your friend,” he told her, and I saw the burn of anger and some other emotion in his eyes I almost failed to recognize. UntilI remembered that barely two weeks ago Dad and Zade buried their best friend, too, and I knew that it was a shared understanding of this loss. This grief.
Beccanodded slowly, giving them permission to help with Toby.
Ifelt her sag against me as we crossed the threshold and went out into the stairwell. Her chest still spasmed with phantom sobs, but the farther we got from the carnage upstairs, the more her tears dried. The blanker her stare became.
Fuck. Was she going into shock?
“Tell me we’re going to kill him,” she said, shocking the hell out of me with the evenness of her tone after I set her in the passenger seat.
Herbrown eyes were backlit with auburn flame.
“Yes,” I told her. “We’re going to kill him, baby. That’s a promise.”