Chapter 24
“He wouldn’t actually just leave, right?”
Westill had no idea what Aodhán did to slow down the Sons. There could be blowback. It wasn’t safe for Hardin to be out alone right now even if he was the scariest monster in the dark. I still didn’t like his chances if he was heavily outnumbered and I didn’t think I could take it if he staggered through that door looking even half as bad as Aodhán did.
“Nah,” Kaleb said, pulling out another chair to sit next to me. “He’s probably out back in the shed. He’s got a heavy bag out there.”
Iswallowed hard.
“You were right about him,” Kaleb said quietly, watching Aodhán out of the corner of his eye. “Maybe he can be trusted. He obviously cares enough about you to do whatever it takes to stop his Dad.”
“We don’t know that.”
Hehadn’t said anything other than that he managed to slow them down. For all we knew Hardin could be right. This could all be some kind of elaborate trap. But in my heart of hearts Iknew Kaleb was right. Aodhán almost died trying to buy us time tonight. For me.
“It’s just guilt,” I found myself saying, watching Aodhán’s chest rise and fall, his clover necklace glimmering in the light. “He’s the reason Séamas found out about me.”
“Did he tell you that?”
Ishrugged. “He didn’t have to.”
Icould see it in his eyes that day in the supply closet. He’d told Séamas out of some misplaced sense of loyalty and this was his way of trying to make things right. This was him groveling for my forgiveness…in his own way.
“It’s just guilt,” I repeated.
ButKaleb shook his head. “Nah. It’s more than that, Vixen, and you know it.”
Icouldn’t look at him.
“I’m not sure I mentioned it,” I said on a sigh. “It wasn’t really important, but that day Damien—at your place—the day I found out he was my biological father. It was Aodhán that came and picked me up. I was a mess. He stayed with me for hours and just let me talk. He stayed with me even when I was quiet.”
Isensed the shift in Kaleb and something curdled in my stomach.
“Nothing happened,” I rushed to say. “Nothing has ever happened between us…like that, I mean. He was just…I don’t know, a friend? And then when I found out who he was and that he’d turned around and told Séamas all about who I was…”
Itrailed off.
“Yeah, I would’ve beat him with a tire iron, too, Vixen. I assume some of those bruises are your doing?”
Kalebindicated the thick angry purple lines on Aodhán’s forearm. I’d been ignoring them, but faced with them now I found I didn’t feel as guilty as I thought I might.
Hetold his father about me—who I was.
Heshot Kaleb.
Aodhánreally was lucky I didn’t bring my gun into his house instead of the tire iron.
But…he also saved my life.
Andwhatever he did tonight—I had a feeling it could mean the difference between surviving this war and suffocating slowly under Séamas’ boot.
Kalebcleared his throat. “So, it goes without saying that I don’t trust this guy further than I can throw him.” He leaned down, resting his elbow on his knees. “ButI know that that shit—” He pointed to Aodhán, and I knew he meant the scars he now lay on. “Can really fuck you up. And that’s a whole other level. Not to play devil’s advocate here because frankly, Vixen, I want you all to myself, but I can see why this guy told Séamas about you. I can see why he shot me.”
“Because he’s a coward?”
Kalebshook his head. “No. He doesn’t strike me as a coward. He strikes me as a loyal son. It’s been lashed into him—that loyalty. Like those fucked up religious fanatics that flog themselves for their sins against god. Séamas is the god of the Sons. They’re willing to die on his cross. Just like he’s taught them.”
Hesighed.
“I don’t think Aodhán’s a coward at all. As much as I’d like to say he is. ButI think escaping Séamas and breaking free of what looked like years of conditioning to choose something for himself—that takes bravery.”
Mychest ached.
“How could a father do that to his son?”
Forall GregoryHart’s faults, I could truly say that I never worried he might raise a hand to me. Not ever. And everything he did and said, he did because he thought it was what was best for me, whether or not he was wrong. It made me feel like a total dick for continuing to ignore his messages all this time since I found out about Damien.
Ishook my head, scattering the thoughts that weren’t a help to anyone or anything right now.
“Aodhán’s still a murderer, Kaleb.”
“We all are. And even though I’ll never forgive him for what he did at Gilligan’sFinch, he did it to save your life. So how the fuck am I supposed to hate him for that?”
Idropped my head into my hands, groaning. I’d been asking myself the same question, but I was the one who had to wear that guilt like leaden weights on my shoulders. TheKents—even though I didn’t know them—were dead so that I could live.
Evenif I didn’t light that fuse myself, I still felt the stain on my soul from each life ripped from this earth.
“You should go talk to Hardin,” Kaleb said and his touch on my knee made me realize how cold I was. How the chill swept through my body as if it were hollowed out.
Iwrapped my arms around my half naked torso, shivering. “What do I even say?”
“Tell him the truth, Vixen. But first, you need to accept it yourself. You like this guy. You have for a while by the sounds of it.”
Iopened my mouth to argue, but he held up a hand. “I know nothing will happen between you if Hardin and I aren’t cool with it. I know. You don’t even have to say it. But the way I see it, one more skilled gunman willing to take a bullet for you can’t be a bad thing.”
Iclamped my mouth shut because I didn’t know what the hell to say. I did like Aodhán, but did I like him that way? My gaze fell onto his face. I’d cleaned away the blood and closed the worst of the cuts with butterfly closures like the ones I was able to finally remove this morning.
Hisdirty blonde hair, even darkened by smoke and filled with some kind of debris—the way it fell over his forehead…
Howhis green eyes seemed to hold a thousand thoughts and emotions and nothing at all in the span of the same breath.
Thecut of his jaw. His cheekbones.
Therewas no denying he was handsome, but it was more than just that. It’d been more than just that since that very first night when I got into his car after leaving this house.
Justbecause it would be easier if it weren’t true didn’t mean it wasn’t.
“I’ll stay with him,” Kaleb offered.
Inodded, more to myself than to him, rising from the chair on unsteady feet. Fuck, I was exhausted. My body felt waterlogged and heavy. My head spun.
Whenwas the last time I ate?
Icouldn’t remember.
AvaJade would have my fucking head if she knew I wasn’t eating properly, but how the hell was I supposed to have any sort of appetite with all this shit going on?
“Whoa, Vixen.”
Kalebshot to his feet to steady me with one hand on my elbow and the other on my lower back. “On second thought, how about some water first, yeah? Maybe some food. I’ll cook?—”
Iwinced and he pursed his lips with a guilty nod. “Okay, no cooking. Hear you loud and clear. Some crackers at least?”
Ilet Kaleb feed me crackers and refill my water glass twice before I felt mentally and physically ready to face Hardin. He didn’t say a word while I ate, letting me think through it all while Aodhán dozed across the room with a knot tightening and loosening in his brow.
“Maybe a shirt?” Kaleb said as I got to my feet and eyed the back door. I looked down at myself, remembering I’d torn it up to make a sling for Aodhán. I’d literally given him the shirt off my back. AndI didn’t even think about it aside from knowing that it would piss Hardin off.
God. I was behaving like an idiot.
I’dblame the lack of sleep and proper hydration but I knew that really it was just me. Just this bruised heart trying to heal. Find ways to love. To trust. And rebelling against me every step of the way.
“Here,” Kaleb used one hand to pull his shirt from his back and stood. “Arms up.”
Isnorted, but lifted them for him to slip the shirt over my head. It was still warm from his body.
“How is it?” I asked, laying a hand ghost-soft against the fresh bandage on his chest.
“I barely feel it.”
“You’re a shitty liar.”
“Takes one to know one,” he winked and then reached over to spin me around and slap me on the ass. “Now get out there.”
“If he bites my head off, I’m blaming you,” I said without turning back, mostly joking, but I heard Kaleb’s reply as I opened the back door anyway.
“I think Hardin would cut off his own hands before he laid them on you,” Kaleb said, laughing darkly, like he couldn’t quite believe it himself.
Itonly made this even harder, but as I closed the door behind me, I realized that a new day was dawning over SantaClarita. Painting the navy skies with streaks of pink, violet, and the start of a brassy gold. A new day where we were all still here. Still breathing.
AndI wasn’t going to waste it.
Theyard was quiet. I didn’t know what I expected. Maybe for the shed to be torn apart? Or at the very least to hear the rhythmic thudding of bare knuckles on a heavy bag, chains rattling as it swayed.
Butthere was nothing. If it weren’t for the door sitting half ajar, I wouldn’t have believed he was in there at all.
AsI stepped up the single step and into the shadows, the smells of old paint, metal, and gasoline filled my nose. And there, standing with the heels of his palms pressed hard against his eyes, stood Hardin.
Hepulled his hands back as he heard me come in, leveling black eyes on me as a snarl pulled up one corner of his mouth.
“Leave,” he said, his voice laced with poison.
Itried not to let him see how much he could hurt me with just one word, swallowing past the lump in my throat as I clenched my fists.
“No.”
Ishut the door behind me and the shadows darkened in the absence of the first rays of dawn light.
“Becca, please. Just fucking g-g-get out.”
“No.”
Thedark shape of him moved so fast I didn’t have time to react before he had me against the door, his fist around my throat, his warm breath fanning over my lips. “Why?”
Thepads of Hardin’s fingertips were rough against my skin, but he wasn’t squeezing. He wasn’t hurting me. This was a threat. He was trying to scare me off.
Hewas failing miserably.
Isqueezed my thighs, swallowing against his palm.
“BecauseI don’t think you really want me to go.”
“Why not? Why not just get it over with, hm?”
Hislips brushed mine and I felt the rumble of his deep voice all the way to my toes. I gasped, not understanding how only his touch, his voice, could turn me on like a light switch. From ice cold to searing hot. From barely conscious to fully alive.
“Get what over with?” I managed as I squirmed against the swell of something deep in my core, feeling his hips press into me.
“You were never going to stay with someone like me, Hawk,” he said and his grip on me loosened. His tone shifted. So soft. So unlike him. It was pained, almost, and I hated it.
“AndI don’t think I can force you to stay anymore if you wanted to g-g-go. I c-c-care too much—fuck.”
Myeyes burned.
“Fuck.”
Hereleased me.
Ishoved him back with everything I had, catching him off guard snapping him out of whatever bullshit thought had him breaking on the inside.
“Is that what you fucking think?” I couldn’t keep the venom out of my voice. “ThatI’ll what? ChooseAodhán? Just up and go? Run away into the sunset with him and forget you ever existed? Glad to hear you think so fucking little of me.”
“Hawk,” he warned as I stepped closer and he stepped back. In the cramped space there wasn’t anywhere for him to go. All around us shelves of spray paint and oil and other random garden tools and chemicals cased us in and there was no way in hell I was letting him get past me. We needed to hash this out. Now.
“You”—I poked him in the chest—“HardinSt. Vincent, are a monumental idiot.”
Hisshoulders expanded with a deep, angry intake of air.
“But you’re my idiot.”
Hedeflated, a muscle in his jaw flexing.
“Haven’tI made it fucking obvious that I’m not going anywhere yet?”
HisAdam’s apple bobbed.
“Haven’tI?”
Hisgaze hardened.
“Don’t go quiet on me now, Hardin. Fucking talk to me.”
Helicked his lips, gaze dragging over the floor. “Tell me you don’t want him, too.”
Iclosed my lips and all the embers that he’d stoked into a growing flame in my chest were smothered in an instant.
“I’m not blind, Hawk.”
Hewaited for me to reply and it took me longer than it should’ve to give him a reply. “I’m not going to tell you something I’m not even sure is true myself, yet,” I said, finding the words. “But if this…this thing with Aodhán doesn’t sit right with you then nothing will ever happen.”
Somethingshifted in his expression.
“I don’t trust him, Hawk.”
“I know.”
“And if he does anything to hurt you, I’ll open every fucking stitch I just closed and bleed him dry.”
“Wouldn’t expect anything less.”
Wasthis his permission?
“You can have him,” he gritted out between his teeth, his hands flexing at his sides. “But not tonight.”
Theair in the tight space shifted, pulsing with something electric that set my every nerve ending ablaze and made my skin sing.
“Tonight, you’re mine.”
Awhimper passed my lips before Hardin crushed his mouth to mine. His fist twisted into my hair, drawing me closer to him, forcing my body to mold to his as he lifted me by the ass, grinding his growing cock into my pussy through my jeans.
Icursed against his lips and he used the opportunity to claim my mouth with his tongue.
Irolled my hips into him, earning myself an animal sound from the back of his throat as my back collided with a hard shelf and metal cans clattered to the concrete floor beneath us. I reached out for something to hold onto, shoving more shit off the shelves until my hands curled around the steel bars holding up the shelves themselves.
Pullingmyself up, I arched my back and angled my hips, pressing harder into him as his lips claimed my chin, my throat, the top of my chest through Kaleb’s shirt.
Hardinripped it off and I winced, hoping Kaleb wouldn’t miss it as it fell to the floor beneath us to join the mess we made.
Roughhands palmed my tits and the fabric of my bra tore as he tried to jerk it out of the way.
Imoaned as his teeth caressed my nipple, tongue flicking out to taste me as he gripped me by the waist, using me to fuck him through his pants.
Mywetness seeped through my panties and I could feel it painting the front of his jeans, but that only seemed to wind him up even more. He bit my nipple, just hard enough to make me cry out before he licked away the pain, teasing it to a stiff peak.
“The things I want to do to you, Hawk,” his voice was a rumble against my chest. Restrained and full of power.
“Take me,” the words were a plea. I needed this as badly as he did. I needed him to take me away from this nightmare we were living in. Make me feel alive when we were two steps shy of slipping into our graves if we were careful. If we weren’t strong.
Iwanted him to claim me in the way I knew he needed to claim me right now. In the way only he could.
“Take me,” I cried out and he spun me around. I just caught myself on the shelf and was almost ripped to the ground as he tore off my pants, but my grip on the shelving kept me upright as air kissed my pussy.
Hekicked my legs apart.
Imoved to reach back, but he gripped my wrist and put my hand back on the shelf in front of me. Wordlessly demanding that I hold on and not let go.
“Do you trust me, Hawk?”
Igasped as cool metal brushed my inner thigh.
Icouldn’t look down. I wasn’t sure I could handle seeing what Hardin was pushing steadily up my thigh, even if I recognized the feel of the smooth metal barrel.
“Yes,” I said, the word breaking on my lips as the tip of Hardin’s weapon brushed my wet clit.
Ishook, and he steadied me with a hand on my thigh as he eased the business end of the barrel over my clit, rubbing it in slow, torturous circles.
“Hardin, wait,” I spluttered as he pushed the tip of it inside. “Stop.”
Hepushed me hard against the shelf when I tried to turn around and I felt the barrel enter me, filling me with cold hard steel in a way that had me moaning even though my heart felt like it was going to pound a hole through my chest.
Myskin burned and my body trembled as all-consuming fear warred with uncontrolled desire. Black spots danced in at the edges of my vision as my pussy clenched around the gun and Hardin began to rub my thumb over my clit as he fucked me with it.
“This is what you like, isn’t it, Hawk?” he whispered roughly in my ear and the feel of him, warm breath and rough stubble against my neck made me feral with the need to be dominated. “Does it make you feel alive? Hm?”
“Yes,” I panted, my hips moving of their own volition now, hungry for more. More pressure in my pussy. More of his fingers on the most sensitive parts of me.
“No one else will ever make you feel like this. Thisis mine.”
“Yes.”
Igripped the shelving harder as Hardin pumped the barrel of the gun deeper into my pussy, punishing me.
“Be a good girl and come for me, Hawk.”
Athis words, I lost the fight. Desire won out over fear and I let out a broken, inhuman sound of pleasure as I came on Hardin’s gun with his fingers still working me.
Iwasn’t finished, still shaking, core aching, when the smooth metal was ripped from me and the heat of Hardin filled me up so fully that I lost my breath at the sudden pressure of him.
Heflexed his hips, seating his massive cock as deep into my pussy as it would go with a guttural groan.
Hisfingers snaked up the back of my neck and into my hair, wrenching my head back, making my back arch as he stole another brutal kiss from my lips.
Onlywhen all the air was stolen from my lungs, leaving me gasping, did he start to move.
Iwhimpered as he fucked me hard and slow, every thrust of his hips a violent slap against my ass, making my tits knock into the shelving I still gripped onto for dear fucking life.
Theshelving rattled, starting to come loose from the wall, but I didn’t care. I couldn’t think—could hardly see straight as Hardin wrecked my pussy so thoroughly that I felt my own wetness seeping down my thighs. My knees buckled and Hardin had to band an arm around my middle to hold me up, never stopping his vicious pace between my legs.
Themetallic ring of snapping metal punctuated Hardin’s next thrust and I felt the shelves under my hands give way.
Igasped, crying out as the metal came loose.
Hardinroughly moved me, spinning me to press me flat against the door as the shelf fell behind us, knocking into another one with a loud bang and a clatter of aluminum cans. The sharp groan of tearing metal met my ears and an arc of weak dawn sunlight filled the shed, painting the back of my head, my neck, with gentle warmth.
“Fuck, Hawk,” Hardin panted, fucking me into the door so hard I felt splinters push into my palms, the side of my chin, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. Not even as the solid weight of him made it hard to breathe as he pounded me against the solid panel of wood.
Thehinges creaked, punctuating my every wild moan and cry.
Andthen I felt the build of it again. Deeper. An internal orgasm that was going to shatter my entire world.
Icursed against the warm wood, pushing back into Hardin, trying to angle him just right, riding the wave of rough pleasure until I thought I might pass out from the high of it. The anticipation.
Ormaybe it was just lack of oxygen as Harding pushed against the back of my head and gripped my hip to pin me in place as he took what he wanted from me. What he needed.
Ichoked, fighting for air as Hardin lost himself in my body.
Andas the orgasm tore through my core, I felt my body release, my own breathless scream echoing in my skull.
“Fuck, yes,” Hardin grunted, and I felt the moment he found his release with me, thrusting one last time. The door chose that moment to come off the hinges.
Mystomach fluttered at the sudden loss of solid ground, and I yelped as Hardin yanked me back into his chest as the door fell forward into the yard and we fell back.
Hardinlanded on his ass and me on his lap, his cock impaling back into me so hard I saw stars.
Heleaned back, pulling me with him, but his back knocked into the fallen shelf, shoving it through the aluminum wall even further, until sunlight fell on us both.
Dustfiltered through the channel of light, disrupted by our heavy breaths as I lay against Hardin’s chest, and he curled his arms around me amid the wreckage. A low chuckle rumbled against my back, and I smiled to myself at the sound as Hardin pressed a kiss to the top of my head.
“I think you’re going to need a new shed,” I said between pants.
AndHardin laughed. The sound was like a balm to my soul.
Heslipped a hand up between my breasts, resting it against my thudding heart as his laughter quieted.
“You own a part of that,” I told him, wincing as I rose just enough to climb off his cock and turn around to look him in the eyes.
Hedrew my hand to his chest, placing it in the same spot where he still held his against mine. “WhateverI have, it’s yours, Hawk. Scars and all.”