Ryder (Phoenix MC #1)

Thirty-Four

I was lucky, and pretty heartbroken, to get a seat on the bus. It was heading out of town, down south towards the coast, but at least we were moving within minutes. I knew that it would be the maximum amount of time I’d have, before Ryder realised I’d gone, and tried to track me down.

I wished that he would, that he’d find me, and drag me back, and keep me. But I also knew that it would be better for him if he just let me go. Safer. Healthier. Our relationship was toxic, and it couldn’t continue. So why did I want to scream and cry, and run straight back to him?

We were on one of the dual carriageways heading out of town towards the motorway, when I realised that the engine was louder, and growing louder all the time. Oh god. No. It wasn’t the bus’s engine. It was motorbikes . It was them. Ryder . His brothers.

I risked peeping out of the window, which I’d been sitting back from, and saw multiple bikes riding alongside the bus, with a few moving up ahead. They seemed to be on the other side too. It was clear what they were doing; a pincer effect. They were forcing the bus to slow down and stop, by surrounding it, and slowing down on their bikes, and it was dangerous as hell. Just another example of how I brought nothing but danger to Ryder.

The bus finally slowed, and stopped, with the driver apologising to the passengers, and explaining that we’d be moving again soon, but obviously he had no idea what was going on.

People were looking worried, unnerved, even afraid. I supposed that a group of big bikers would scare most people, but not me . I’d actually started to accept them as my people, and now I almost wanted to see them.

The bus doors whooshed open, and I heard a voice up front, talking to the driver. As they spoke, several bikers entered the bus, and started walking up the aisle in my direction. Nobody had spotted me yet, so they were checking faces in every seat on their way.

I’d picked a seat at the back, because they were more comfortable, but also because they gave me more to hide behind. The fact that I could hide, while my heart was breaking, was just the icing on the cake.

It wasn’t long before heavy boots were approaching me, and I knew he’d found me.

“Tori, baby… what’s going on?” Ryder dropped to his knees in front of my seat, and I saw Reacher behind him, nodding at the others to back off with him.

“I’m sorry, Ryder.”

He grabbed my hands, squeezing them gently.

“Don’t be sorry. Just tell me you’re not running from me. From us. Tell me you’re not throwing us away. Please, baby.”

My god. I felt new tears burning my eyes, because that was all I wanted, but I had to leave to save him from me.

“I’m bad for you, Ryder. I’m… I’m toxic, and you need someone better. You deserve better.”

He shook his head, tugging gently at my hands.

“Baby, all I need is you. Please. I want you to be my old lady. I want you with me always, regardless of how we have to do things.”

He didn’t put it into words, but we both knew that it was the reason I’d run. The only reason I’d have chosen to be away from him. My love. My safe place. My only happy place.

“It’s not good for you. It’ll hurt you.” Tears were rolling down my cheeks again.

Someone further up the bus cursed, and complained about his journey being delayed.

“You got something to say, buddy?” I saw Has-Been leaning down to get in his face, and the man miraculously shut up in an instant.

“Tori, please. Come home with me. Let’s at least talk about this. If you still want out, I’ll give you a ride anywhere, baby. I love you .”

There was an older lady sitting across from me, and I heard a sigh from her direction. Meeting her eyes, I saw tears on her face too.

“Not every day you see that. Give him a chance, love. You never get your time back, so use it for what makes you happy.”

Ryder grinned at her. “Thanks, love.”

He looked at me again.

“Please? Come home with me. Just give me an hour.”

I nodded, and he sighed, his head dropping for a second.

“Thank fuck.”

Then he was pulling me up from the seat, nodding at the lady as he led me past her, my hand tightly clasped in his.

We made our way down the aisle of the bus, the rest of the bikers already leaving ahead of us, and when we were level with the driver, Ryder nodded at him.

“Thanks, man. Appreciate the chance to catch up with my old lady.”

The driver offered a half salute in response, and then we stepped down from the bus onto the road. I’d never been out of a vehicle and standing on a dual carriageway like this. It was terrifying, with cars whizzing past the parked up bikes at scary speeds, with the bus almost on the edge of the grass verge.

Ryder lifted his backpack from my shoulder, and tossed it at Torch, then he grabbed a spare helmet from his bike, and fastened it over my head.

“You’re gonna want to hold on to me really tightly, baby. Don’t let go.”

He straddled his bike, and Torch took my hand and helped me on behind him, before he made his way to his own bike. One by one the motorbikes started up, and started moving, merging back into traffic, so that the bus could get moving again.

I gripped Ryder tightly as his bike started to move, and as we picked up speed, he grabbed my hand from his chest, and dragged it to his stomach, pulling me tighter against him. I got the memo. I clasped my hands together, holding on for dear life, as the bike roared between our legs, and the road, and vehicles, whizzed by.

It was scary at first. Terrifying, in fact . I’d wanted to stop almost instantly, and then he’d pulled me closer, and made me feel safer, and suddenly it was a very different experience. Suddenly it was exciting. Exhilarating.

Ryder

I nearly fucking lost her. I… if Ice hadn’t managed to pick her up on a fucking camera, around the side of the compound, and seen which bus she disappeared onto, she’d have been out of town, and I’d have lost her.

Thank fuck for Ice, and his, probably drug-induced, paranoia, which led to multiple cameras around the complex, facing out at the roads. His plan was that we’d never be caught unawares by visitors. Of course, that hadn’t helped when I was driven back, and dumped here that night by Tori, but I kinda think that was meant to happen. I had to go through that, to find her.

None of that early stuff mattered anymore anyway. What mattered was that the woman I loved was wrapped around me on my fucking bike where she belonged. If she thought she was ever running again, she was out of her damn mind. I just had to push things along, and make her mine sooner. No more tiptoeing around her and her feelings. I had to get the process under way fucking now.

When we reached the compound, the gates were already open, since the prospects usually heard us coming, even without the camera feeds.

Eight of us had flagged that bus down. Eight fucking bikers, and a few tons of bus. It could have taken most of us out, even accidentally. Reacher, Stitch, Torch, and Has-Been, had dropped everything, grabbed others on the way, and then we were riding out to find my woman, and bring her back. My old fucking lady .

I walked my bike back into my space, and waited for Reacher to help Tori climb down, before I rested it on its stand, and turned off the engine. I grabbed her arm the moment I was on my feet, and dragged her against my chest, holding her tightly.

“Fucking hell, Tori, I was so scared. Please don’t do that again. Don’t leave me .”

She pressed her face against my neck and shuddered. She was crying again.

“Jesus, please tell me what’s going on in that head of yours. What happened to send you away? Was it… uh, guys, you wanna sod off, so we can have some privacy? ”

“Yeah, you’re welcome, asshole.” A few of them slapped me on the back on their way past, and then we were alone.

“If it was about what Torch and Has-Been were saying, don’t worry about it. It’s nobody’s business but ours.”

She pulled back to look at me, her face wet from crying.

“It’s dangerous, Ryder. They’re right. We’re drugging you. We’re putting a chemical into your body that could have long term effects. Not to mention… well, it’s always a risk, isn’t it? Buying illegal substances from anywhere. Knowing that there could be anything in it. What if we do that one day, and it poisons you? Kills you? I can’t take that risk.”

Her words chilled me to the bone, because of course, she was right. Whether we liked it or not, our little method of sex would do some kind of lasting damage at some point, and could either of us live with that?

An idea was tickling at the back of my mind, but I set it aside for now. Leading Tori inside, I headed for the bar and Tommy, and Tori gasped, shooting me an accusing glare.

“Who hit him?” I frowned, because I knew it wasn’t me. It was all a bit of a blur now, but I was like sixty percent sure it wasn’t me.

Tommy shrugged good-naturedly.

“The Pres was pretty pissed at me, but it was my fault. I shouldn’t have let you leave. It’s all good.”

She was shaking her head.

“I’m so sorry, Tommy. This was my fault, not yours. It was so fucking selfish of me to leave you to take the fall for this.”

I dragged her to the corner, where we could sit.

“Tommy, we’ll eat now.”

He nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.

“I didn’t mean for him to get hurt.”

I grinned at my old lady.

“I’m sure you didn’t mean for me to try choking one of the gate prospects to within an inch of his life either. Shit happens, baby .”

She gasped, her hand over her mouth.

“You did what?”

I shrugged, literally giving zero fucks at all about the whole situation. I had my woman back, and that was all I cared about right now.

“He should have known better.”

“So I’m not allowed to leave ever again?”

I winked at her, leaning back in my seat and finally relaxing a little.

“We can go anywhere you want to go, baby. You just need to accept that running from me isn’t an option. I’ll always find you .”

She probably should have found that creepy, but she smiled instead. Yeah, we were definitely not of the norm, and maybe that’s why we’d work.

“Here’s what’s gonna happen, okay? We’re gonna have a nice dinner, and something to drink. Then we’re going back to our room to sleep, because this has been a seriously fucking long ass day. And tomorrow?”

She raised her eyebrows.

“Tomorrow, I’m making you my fucking old lady. Official . No fucking going back then. You’ll be mine, and I’ll be yours.”

Surprisingly, she just nodded.

“I do want that. I just worry that you could do better.”

In a fucking pig’s eye . I leaned over the small table separating us.

“You’ll stop that damn thinking right now. You’re exactly who I want and need. You’re all I want. So stop looking down on the woman I love, because I don’t take kindly to that.”

Tommy cleared his throat awkwardly, setting down plates in front of us as I moved.

“Drinks?”

“Coffee.” I raised my eyebrows at Tori, and she nodded.

“Same, please.”

“Don’t be too nice to him. He has to learn,” I muttered, after he’d walked away.

“He’s a human being, Ryder. He deserves to be treated with respect.”

“No. He’s a prospect, and the one who literally watched you leave me, and did fucking nothing to stop you.”

She grinned. “I made out that I was having women’s troubles. He’s young enough to be grossed out at the thought of that.”

“Little pussy. I should kick his ass myself this time.”

In the end, I decided to just eat my dinner, and be thankful that Tori was right there with me. After we’d eaten though, I decided it was time for the truth.

“Baby?”

We’d moved to a sofa in the bar, so we could sit closer together, with a vodka each.

“Yeah?”

“I’m making you my old lady tomorrow.”

She nodded. “I know.”

I pulled her against my chest.

“There’s something you should know about the process.”

She pushed away from me, so she could meet my eyes. Why the hell did she look so freaked out all of a sudden?

“Please tell me that it doesn’t involve sex in front of them. You know I… I can’t… I…”

“Jesus Christ, woman. We’re bikers, not barbarians . It’s nothing like that, although actually, now it probably won’t sound so bad at all.”

“Go on.” She looked wary.

“It… the process involves tattoos.”

Her eyes drifted from mine for a moment, and I worried she was going to a dark place in her mind again.

“You mean someone else has to touch me.”

Jesus . “I… Fuck… I wish I could be the one to do it, but you really don’t want anything I can draw marring that perfect skin. Never wished I’d be good at art until right fucking now.”

She frowned, her finger stroking down my throat.

“Who would do it?”

I considered our options, figuring I could probably guess the outcome.

“Two of our members are trained. Has-Been is one of them.”

She nodded. “He’s the only one I’d trust to come that close.” Fuck. I hated it instantly, but also felt relieved that she trusted one of my closest friends. A true brother .

“Okay. He won’t do anything untoward, I promise you.”

She swallowed. “I know. Who… who would do yours?”

I shrugged, because it was irrelevant to me. Both our tattooists were talented as fuck, and had both inked me in the past.

“Him or Rocket, but I don’t really give a fuck. It’ll look good whoever does it. About the tattoo…”

She nuzzled my chest, and I damn near forgot every fucking word of what I was saying.

“Ryder?”

“Uh… yeah…”

She giggled, lifting her head.

“You were telling me about the tattoo I’m going to have to have.”

This is it. “Uh… so I’ll be getting one, and it’ll say you’re my old lady, and include our club logo, and… hell… yours would say ‘Property of Ryder’ .” I waited for the fallout. Waited with bated breath for the feminist outburst that was sure to follow, but she just giggled, and snuggled against my chest.

“Okay.” What?

“Okay? Just like that? Okay?”

She snuggled closer. “Yeah. I’m okay with that.”

Jesus, she just kept surprising me.

“Ryder?”

“Yeah, babe?”

“What will yours say?”

“It’s a design the club has. It’ll show your name, and old lady under it, with the club logo.” I never thought I’d wear one, and now I couldn’t fucking wait.

“It won’t say ‘property of Tori’?”

I couldn’t hold back my laugh.

“Doesn’t work like that, babe.” She tried to move, and I tightened my arms on her. “I’m yours. We both know that, but the tat doesn’t say it.”

She grumbled under her breath, but said no more about it. She dozed off in my lap, and I took the opportunity to message Ice.

Me : Need something, brother .

Ice : So you don’t talk to me for days, and then you want something. Shall I explain how this shit is supposed to work?

I snorted, and replied.

Me : Hey brother, long time no talk. How’s it hanging? Any news? Need me to braid your fucking hair?

I imagined him laughing when he read it, and watched as the reply dots kept winking on and off for long painful seconds.

Ice : What do you need, asshole?

I grinned. That’s more like it. I replied, detailing exactly what I needed, and smirked when his reply said simply ‘fuck’.