Savage (Park Avenue Kings #1)

19. Cooper

19

COOPER

T HE DOOR TO the car slammed shut, and just like that, Lachlan and I were alone again. Only this time, he wasn’t giving me directives on how to suck his dick, not when he couldn’t sit still and stop fidgeting.My how the tables had turned.

He was trying hard to hide it, but every so often he’d ball his hands up tight before flexing them wide and shifting restlessly in his seat. Then his thumb would brush over the finger he usually had a ring on, and when he realized it wasn’t there, he would reach up to run his hand over his hair. But the second he touched the short black wig, he’d drop his arm and sigh.

Over and over again, on repeat.

Fucking drugs.

I wanted to lean over and comfort him somehow, but I was in a state of my own making right then. There was no need for the high Mick’s shit had given Lachlan, because I still had the taste of Lachlan’s cum on my tongue. And that fueled the raging hard-on that had made it difficult to walk out of the club.

Hell, just sitting here was pain on a whole other level. My cock ached for release, and had I not been playing the part of obedient submissive on my knees in front of a table full of people, I would’ve said fuck having my dom’s permission and creamed my pants right there. With Lachlan’s incredible dick in my mouth.

Fuuuuck. No. He wasn’t my dom. I wasn’t his plaything. We’d only been acting our parts, and now the jig was up.

I kept my hands in my lap, pressing down hard against my erection as if that could shut it off.

God, he’d played his part well, though. If I didn’t know better, I’d think Lachlan was a bossy dom who orchestrated drug hauls on the side.

And directed his sub to his knees to blow him…

“Are you okay?”There was a rough edge to Lachlan’s voice that had me jerking my head in his direction.

“Am I okay? Shouldn’t I be asking you that?”

He rubbed his ringless finger absently. “I’m fine.”

Maybe so, but the situation was far from it. Something could’ve happened to him, and I didn’t even want to think about that.

“That was risky as hell, you know,” I said. “What if Mick’s shit was tainted?”

“It wasn’t.”

“But it could’ve been.”

“But it wasn’t.” He ran a finger along his lower lip as he gazed out the window. “I…apologize. For making you do what you did.”

His words hung heavy in the air between us, and it took me a second to realize what he was apologizing for.

It wasn’t often I was rendered speechless, but what did I say to a man who thought he should apologize for letting me suck his cock? That didn’t warrant an apology, not when I would’ve begged to get a taste of him all the way back at the coffee shop.

“Uh…” I cleared my throat and tried again. “You didn’t make me to do anything.”

“I did. It was my idea.”

“And I didn’t say the safe word.”

“No,” he mused, and finally met my eyes. “You didn’t.”

Tension sparked between us in the dark, so many things I wanted to say—or do —but then Lachlan sniffed and wiped at his nose a couple of times.

Now wasn’t the time for any of that, not when he was high.

Fuck Mick. Fuck every single one of those assholes who’d played a part in killing Alex and countless others. I was grateful Lachlan had figured out a way for me to keep my head down and not look them in the eye, because doing so would’ve blown our cover. There was no way I’d be able to hide my rage.

He fingered the buttons of his shirt that started halfway down his chest and sighed. “I just didn’t want you to have to do that shit. Not with what it did to your friend.”

Silence stretched between us, and the longer it went on, the more my ears began to ring.

Was I understanding him correctly or had I gone crazy? Because it sure sounded like he’d given me an out so I wouldn’t have to partake in the drugs with the rest of them. Like he was protecting me in some sweet, very fucked-up plan.

It sounded like he’d been choosing between two evils in that moment and gone with the lesser one. That was just proof he was high and not thinking clearly, because there was nothing wrong with a blow job. There was especially nothing wrong with my being the one to give it, and if Lachlan had been in his right mind, he would’ve seen that clear as day between my thighs.

With the heel of my hand, I pressed down on my dick, willing my erection to go away until I had a private moment to get myself off.

“I can take care of that.” Lachlan watched me with hooded eyes, and then dropped them to my lap.

Desire, hot and fierce, shot through me. It was one thing to be sitting here thinking about sliding my mouth up and down his cock; it was another thing to imagine he’d want to do that.

To me.

Right here, right now.

Hell, even just his hand wrapped around me?—

I squeezed my eyes shut and increased the pressure until it hurt.

Think of something else. Anything else. Fuck, think of Mick.

I couldn’t take advantage of what Lachlan was offering, not when he was so messed up. He didn’t know what he was saying.

“You don’t have to sit there in pain.” Lachlan took my wrist and tugged it away from what I’d been trying, and failing, to conceal.

God, it was tempting. He had no idea how hard it was not to take advantage and beg him to touch me. But all I could see when I looked at him was the role he was playing, and I just couldn’t do it. No matter how much I’d want to kick my ass tomorrow. I already barely recognized myself—a masked lover, blowing Lachlan in a sex club full of drug dealers. If I didn’t deny what I wanted in this moment, I’d secure my spot as completely, irrevocably fucked up.

“I’m fine,” I bit out, harsher than I wanted it to be, but I was trying.

Lachlan let go of my wrist. “Suit yourself.”

When he turned to gaze out the window again, I bit down hard on my lip to avoid begging him to do it. To unbutton these torturous leather pants and suck me so hard and deep I’d never have to come again.

You’re an idiot. Such a fucking idiot.

A few minutes later, like he’d forgotten and it just occurred to him, Lachlan tied the blindfold over my eyes, and I let the annoyance from not knowing where we were fuel me enough that my dick stopped trying to stab through my pants. That would’ve been more awkward to walk around with than it had been to swallow Lachlan’s cock in front of a bunch of strangers.

Who was I again? And why was it all so hot ? Even Lachlan eye-fucking me when he snorted a line was seared into my brain.

With his grip firm on my arm, he led me through wherever we were, into the elevator, up however many floors, before depositing me in the penthouse and untying the blindfold.

“We’re here.”

“So I see…finally.”

“What’d you say?” Lachlan asked as I walked over to my backpack. I needed to get out of this outfit as soon as possible.

“I said finally . The blindfold, remember?”

“Oh, right.” Lachlan’s eyes twitched as he stared me down, then he turned away, rubbing the back of his neck. He had to be feeling like shit. Not that I would know, but he definitely didn't seem like himself.

“Listen, you don’t have to stay up here. I’m just going to go shower and clean up after?—”

“I defiled you.”

“What?” My jaw fell on the floor as I stormed over to him. I grabbed hold of his arm and jerked him around, and the fact he let me spoke volumes. “You did not defile me. I did what I did tonight of my own accord. I did it because?—”

“Of your story.”

That was one reason, but not what I’d been about to say. The reality was I’d wanted to taste him, wanted to put my mouth on him, and the fact he was too goddamn high to know that had me even more frustrated.

“Forget it,” I said, and let go of his arm, snatching up my bag and marching toward the bathroom. “And you can leave. I promise I’m not going to drown in my tears over what you did.”

Was I being snarky? Yes.

Did I care? No.

I was irritable as hell and had a raging hard-on for a man who was treating me like he’d stolen my virtue and now regretted every second of it.

God, was there anything more frustrating? Especially when all I really wanted was for him to pull that stupid wig off, take out those horrible blue contacts, and come join me in the shower.

I slammed the door shut and leaned against it, staring at my reflection in the mirror, and barely recognized the person I saw.

The blond hair had to go, and so did these clothes. Maybe when I was finally free of them I’d feel more like myself. I dropped the bag, peeling the wig off first and then the prosthetic nose and chin they’d added to change the proportions of my face. The contacts went next, then the horrible sheer top, and because I was punishing my stupid dick, I left the leathers for last.

I stepped under the warm water and reveled in the hard pressure of the spray as it hit my back, washing away the night’s activities. It wasn’t that I wanted to forget what I did with Lachlan, but more where it had happened and why .

If it had been after our coffee date or even a second meetup, I’d be memorizing every single second of it. But right now, I wanted to replace it all except the taste of him…the feel of him…and the sound he’d made when I first swallowed him between my lips.

Yes. That’s it…

Remember how his fingers felt in your hair.

How his cock throbbed on your tongue.

Remember the sexy way he ordered you to “suck it.” Now put him in this shower with you.

I soaped up my dick, turned to face the spray, and then braced one hand on the wall. It wouldn’t take long to get myself off, but I was going to make it count.

Closing my eyes, I took myself back between Lachlan’s spread thighs and the hunger I felt when he revealed himself to me for the first time. Long, thick, and veiny, he’d already been hard, cum leaking from the tip, and instantly my mouth had watered.

Even now, as I gave myself several rough strokes, I could feel the way I’d traced the length of him with my tongue. How he’d uttered a breathy grunt every now and then even when he’d been trying not to.

Shit. What I wouldn’t give to have stripped him naked, removed all the shit covering his gorgeous features, and had him in here with me.

My breath was coming out in pants now, my fist moving faster and faster. If I couldn’t have Lachlan the way I wanted—or the way I wanted him to want me —then I’d pretend, right here, with the water washing away the evidence.

I came on a gasp, my cum spraying the walls with the force of it.

It was only when I finally stepped out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel that I realized I hadn’t thought about the masked man all day.