11. Chase
Chapter eleven
Chase
A s I sit alone in my office, the memory of the kiss still fresh in my mind, I can't shake the feeling that something has shifted between Nora and me over the last week.
We’ve moved around each other tentatively, like one of us might bring up the kiss—I’ve wanted to, but I also really haven’t wanted to. It’s complicated. There's a newfound awareness, a tension that lingers in the air whenever we're together, and I can't help but wonder if she feels it, too.
What if she doesn’t feel anything? Did I make a mistake kissing her?
I’m a coward, I think. I don’t want to risk the tentative peace we have, not when things are almost ironed out for our mission.
And, as far as I know, Ethan hasn’t gotten back a hold of her since I threw him out of here last week. I doubt I’ve seen the last of him, but that’s still good.
My thoughts are interrupted when my phone rings, and I answer it without looking at the caller ID, half expecting it to be another mundane task demanding my attention. But, to my surprise, it's my sister on the other end of the line, her voice bright and cheery as always.
“Hey, Chase! How are you doing?” she asks, her voice bubbly in contrast to my sour mood.
“Hey, I’m good, Lauren. What’s up?”
“Guess what?” As per usual, Lauren gives me no time to guess. “I'm coming over for a visit this weekend, I got a few days off from work,” she announces, her excitement palpable even through the phone. She followed her passion for saving others just like me, but in a totally different way working as a doctor. I've always felt she needs longer breaks from working long hospital shifts.
I try to muster up some enthusiasm for her upcoming visit. “That's great, Lauren. I can't wait to see you,” I reply, though my heart isn't quite in it.
There's a moment of silence on the other end of the line, and I can tell that Lauren senses something is off. “Is everything okay, Chase? You don’t sound excited,” she says, her tone laced with concern.
“Just work, that’s all. Tell me how the hospital’s been treating you.”
“No, Chase. I’m not buying that. I can tell something’s wrong.” Lauren and I share a close bond formed over the years having gone through so much together. She might be two years younger than I am, but we have always had a connection more akin to twins.
I hesitate for a moment, unsure of how much to reveal. But then I remember that Lauren has always been able to offer the right advice; she’s the one person I can trust with personal issues like this.
“It's someone,” I admit finally. “Things have been... complicated lately.”
“Someone? Hmm… and who’s that?”
“You don’t know her. Her name’s Nora. Nora Evans. She’s one of the intelligence analysts here.”
There’s a brief moment of silence, and I know Lauren is shocked. Hell, if there was any truth to this, I’d be shocked, too.
There’s some truth. We did kiss…
“Interesting.” Lauren finally says. “I’d love to meet her. I mean I’d love to meet any lady that’s bothering my brother like this. But go on, what happened between you two?”
“We had a moment, and I can’t seem to get her out of my head.”
“Alright, tell me everything. I just might be able to help.”
Lauren listens quietly as I pour out my heart to her, detailing the events of the past few days and the whirlwind of emotions that have consumed me since that kiss.
“Maybe you should talk to her about it,” she suggests gently. “Communication is key in any relationship. You'll never know what could happen if you don't try. Share your thoughts with her. You never know. She just might feel the same way.”
Her words strike a chord within me. Maybe it's time to lay my cards on the table, and be honest with Nora about how I feel. I won't know unless I try.
“I’ll talk with her then. See where it leads us.”
“Please do. It’ll help you a great deal. Remember, I’ll be coming over for the weekend and it’ll be nice to meet her, regardless of where your conversation ends.”
There is a soft knock on my door before it opens slowly, and Nora comes in. Seeing me on a call, she mouths the words, “there’s an update.”
“Hey, sis, I have to go. Thanks for the advice.” I rush out, eager to hear any information on the mission.
“We’ll talk later. See you soon. I love you.”
“Yeah, I love you, too.” I reply and hang up.
I look at Nora, my heart pounding in my chest with nervous anticipation. It's time to have that conversation, to confront the feelings that have been simmering beneath the surface. And whatever happens next, I know that I'll have my sister's support every step of the way.
“Hey, Chase. There’s an update.” She says holding a file, her expression neutral but with a hint of something I can’t decipher in her eyes. I gesture for her to take a seat.
“What's the update about?”
“We have some information. We were finally able to pick up on something. There were voices in the background. Emma thinks it’s Dari, but it could be Kurdish. Can you come by later? I think you'll be able to interpret the language more effectively.”
“Yes, I can. I'll let Commander Keith know as well.”
“We suspect that whoever is behind this seems to know a bit about the operations at the intelligence center. The person's really smart. Here's a report filled with the detailed analysis of our findings.” She hands me the file, and I skim through.
“Great work, as always,” I comment, looking up from the report to meet her gaze. “But there's something else I need to ask you about.”
She raises an eyebrow inquisitively, silently urging me to continue.
I take a deep breath, trying to muster the courage to share my thoughts. “I wanted to talk... to you about... us,” I begin tentatively, my words stumbling over each other in my haste to get them out.
Nora's brow furrows in confusion, but she remains silent, waiting patiently for me to continue.
“I can't stop thinking about the other day, about the kiss,” I confess, my voice barely above a whisper. “I need to know. Was it just a spur-of-the-moment thing, or do you think there was something more behind it?”
Her expression softens, and she meets my gaze with a mixture of yearning and understanding. “Chase, I...” she starts, but then her phone buzzes, cutting her off mid-sentence.
I watch as she reads the message, her brow furrowing in concentration before she looks back up at me, a sheepish smile on her lips. “Sorry about that. Duty calls,” she says, motioning towards her phone screen. “I have to go, but I've also compiled the post-mission analysis for your last operation in the report. Be sure to take a look.” She gets up to leave but panic flashes through me.
I need to tell her now, or I don’t know if I ever will.
Screw communication, I think fervently. Then I hold her hand, tugging her gently towards me.
She gasps in surprise, then exhales slowly before extending her hand to gently touch my arm. “Chase, I...” she starts again, but before she can finish her sentence, I lean in and press my lips to hers, cutting off any further protest. I stay there, almost frozen, my kiss gentle in case she wants to push me back. I wait, heart on the line, until Nora melts into me and begins to kiss me back.
In an instant, time stands still as we share a passionate embrace, everything around us fading away as we lose ourselves in each other. When we finally pull apart, breathless, I know that I have my answer. But as I look into her eyes, I see a flicker of uncertainty there, and questions left unspoken. And as much as I want to push for more, to hear her say the words I badly want to hear, I stop myself. I shouldn't push her away.
She places a palm on my chest, steadying herself, “We shouldn't be doing this.”
“Nora,” I pull her back as she tries to flee again. “Think about it, at least. What do you feel?” I gently squeeze her hand and offer her a reassuring smile. “Take all the time you need to figure this out, but that kiss meant something to me. It wasn't just a spur-of-the-moment thing. I want you.”
“Okay. I'll think about it,” she says, eyes flickering across my face.
She pulls back, her expression indecipherable. I want to say something to convince her to say yes—to take a chance—but I know I have to respect her stepping away.
As I watch her leave, I have the distinct feeling that I’m heading for heartbreak. Nora, at least, is worth the risk.