Searching for her Heart (The Lost Souls of Dyconia #3)

Chapter 1

CHAPTER ONE

PENNY

“Iwant to slow things down.”

I pause with my glass of wine halfway to my mouth as I stare at David.

“Excuse me?”

He sighs, sitting back in his chair. “Look, Pen, I like you, lord knows you’re gorgeous, but things are just moving too fast for me.”

“Too fast? This is our third date in three weeks, how exactly is this too fast?”

He stabs his fork into a piece of pasta on his plate before replying. “I just don’t think we’re at the same stage of life, we aren’t looking for the same things.” He shoves the ravioli into his mouth as I frown at him.

“I’m confused. Your dating profile said you are looking for a long-term relationship. Have you changed your mind, or do you just not see that with me?”

He sighs again, as if talking to me is draining him. “Honestly Pen, you’re ready to get married and have babies tomorrow, but I’m not ready for that yet.”

My mouth opens and closes for a moment before I rein in my thoughts.

“I only asked if you were interested in those things, so I knew if this could go somewhere. I’m not expecting a proposal tomorrow, David.

We haven’t even fooled around yet, let alone slept together.

” I throw my arms out to the side in exasperation.

“On our last date, you basically proposed to me.”

My jaw drops in shock. “I did not!”

“You did.”

“I only asked if you could see yourself marrying me.” He raises his eyebrows at me, as if I proved his point. “What?!”

“You didn’t think it was a bit soon to ask me that?”

“You’re here now, aren’t you? So, you know I’m not some marriage crazed woman.”

“You told me we’d make cute babies together.”

“So what? We would!” What was his problem? I thought he wanted kids.

“It was our second date.”

“So what? I don’t want to waste my time. I’ve been led on too many times by guys who don’t want to take things seriously.”

“I just would rather chill a bit and see where things go.”

“So, the point of bringing me to this restaurant tonight wasn’t because you were going to ask me to be exclusive?” I try to keep the hurt from my voice, but I’m sure he hears it.

“You—Shit, sorry, Penny, I didn’t think you’d be expecting that tonight.” He leans forward and grabs my hand, clutching it between us on the table. “I do like you, can we just take things slow, see where this leads us?” I search his eyes for the truth and let out a breath as I sit back.

“Sure, David, we can do that.” He smiles at me before releasing my hand, leaning back in his chair, and resuming his meal.

I pick up my fork and push my spaghetti around on my plate, thinking over his words. Why do all the guys I meet not want anything serious? Is there something about me that isn’t wife or girlfriend material?

I have had several boyfriends over the years.

At twenty-six, it’s hard not to have had any serious relationships.

But using the word ‘serious’ is a bit of a stretch.

I’ve had three relationships where we got to the boyfriend/girlfriend stage.

We were monogamous, but as soon as I implied I was looking for something more, they bailed.

My longest relationship was nine months, I didn’t think that was too early to talk about moving in together.

Apparently he disagreed. The next longest was four months and when I made a comment about looking forward to having kids in the future, he immediately started getting weird, and ended it within two weeks.

The last relationship ended last year, and it only lasted for three months.

I really liked Elijah and saw a life with him, but apparently he didn’t think the same.

It was the reason I had decided to meet guys on a dating app. I could specify guys looking for marriage and kids and weed out the players. But apparently even that doesn’t work for me. David is the third guy I’ve met on it, and none of them have resulted in anything even close to a relationship.

I glance up at David, who’s playing on his phone while he eats.

Is it my imagination or is he swiping right on his phone a lot right now?

I tilt my head and narrow my eyes as I watch him carefully.

I see a small smirk on his lips each time he swipes right.

I don’t believe it, is this asswipe really on a dating app right now?

Slowly, I lean forward, as if I am reaching for a breadstick in the middle of the table, and when his eyes don’t leave his screen, I lurch forward and grab his phone.

“Hey!” he yells as I quickly turn it to face me. It’s worse than I thought. It isn’t some dating app, no, this is some sort of porn site, and he’s just scrolling through images of naked women.

“What the hell, David?” I turn my angry gaze to him as I pass him back his phone.

“Why would you grab my phone like that? That wasn’t cool.”

I press my fingers into my forehead and rub at the headache forming there. “This isn’t going to work, I’m out.” I stand and drop my napkin on my chair.

“Penny, wait!”

I turn to face him, giving him an unamused stare, as I motion for him to continue.

“I—Could I call you sometime?”

I drop my head back and look at the ceiling, letting out a deep breath. Is he serious right now? Looking back at him, I shake my head. “No, David, lose my number, please. Have a nice life.” With that, I turn and exit the restaurant.

I think about calling a cab but decide I don’t want to go home yet. I don’t want to sit home alone right now, and I haven’t heard back from my best friend Ria since I got back from my horseback riding trip a week ago.

Seeing an open bar across the street, I quickly decide that’s my new destination and make my way over to it.

I haven’t been to this bar before and I can see it’s a more upscale place.

Black leather lines the stools, and a rich brown wood decorates the walls.

There is no dance floor, just a scattering of high top tables fill the center with plush booths along the outside.

I decide to get a drink at the bar and head in that direction.

I order a rum and coke and take a seat, sipping slowly as I think about what to do.

Not tonight, but in life. I try not to let my dreams rest on being married and eventually having kids.

But it’s so hard. It’s all I want. I hate being alone.

No, that’s not entirely true. I enjoy my down time between excursions.

I could chill at home for a week just reading a book by myself.

It doesn’t mean I don’t want more from life.

I take a deep breath and think back to my three-day horseback riding trip last week.

It was a lot of fun. The owner, Jim, was a slightly older man, and he was the one giving me lessons.

There seemed to be natural banter and attraction between us, despite our sixteen year age difference.

We even shared a few kisses behind the barn.

But when I suggested getting together after my three days were over, he brushed me off. Guess I wasn’t his type after all.

“Whatever guy put that look on your face is not worth thinking about,” an unfamiliar voice says from the stool beside me. I turn to see an attractive man sitting there, nursing his own drink. He was clean shaven with slicked back dark brown hair, brown eyes, And a smirk on his lips.

“How do you know I’m thinking about a man?” I ask, with the raise of an eyebrow.

“I can just tell. I’m Derek, can I buy you a drink…”

“Penny. And sure, I’m almost done this one, anyway.”

He motions to the bartender, who swiftly brings us both refills. “So tell me, Penny, what brings you to a place like this, looking so fine and gorgeous?”

“Oh, stop,” I giggle as I playfully bat at his arm. He seems sweet and I’m not opposed to some flirting. I mean, I was single after all.

“Seriously, did you have a date or something?”

I nod before replying. “ Yeah, it was a third date, and I expected it to end completely differently, to be honest.”

“Well, That guy’s an idiot.”

“How do you know that?”

“Any guy who turns down a gorgeous, smart redhead like you is an idiot in my book.”

“Oh my goodness, Derek!” I rest my hand on his bicep, giving it a small squeeze as I chuckle. “Marry me!”

Humor drops from his face as his eyes go wide. “Uhh…”

“Oh, I was just joking,” I say nervously, removing my hand from his arm and grabbing my drink instead.

I tentatively take a sip and sneak a peek at his face to find him frowning at his drink.

Did I just ruin any chance with this guy?

Is that what David had meant about me proposing?

I guess I did say marry me jokingly to him as well. Perhaps guys don’t find that funny.

The silence between us was becoming uncomfortable, and I was not above bailing to get out of this awkward situation, so I quickly throw back the rest of my drink, and pull a twenty from my purse, throwing it on the counter.

“Well, it was nice meeting you Derek, have a good night.” I don’t wait for a reply as I jump off my stool and make my hasty retreat. This time I don’t hesitate to pull out my phone and call myself an Uber.

After tonight, I think I want to take a break from dating and do some more traveling. Clearly I was doing something wrong, maybe I was coming on too strong. But something about having to change who I was, to make a man like me, doesn’t sit well with me.

When I get home, I change into my pajamas and pull out my box of potential travel destinations.

Where should I go this time? I know Ria won’t have the money to go somewhere expensive, so I’ll either have to go solo or find something cheaper.

Of course, I always offer to pay for both of us, as money wasn’t really an issue for me, but she refused to let me pay for her.

She was a stubborn, independent woman like that, but I loved her anyway.

After all, she’s the only family I have left.

ONE YEAR LATER

“What do you mean, you quit?” I look at the man over his desk as I brace my hands on hips and frown down at him.

“I’m sorry, Miss White, but all my leads have led back to the same conclusion. The woman in question is, in fact, the woman you are looking for.”

I throw my hands up in frustration as I grit out my response. “Urg! Mr. Higgins, I’ve told you a hundred times, that woman is not my best friend, Ria. She is an imposter, and I want to know what she’s done with Ria, and how it is that she looks just like her.”

“As I told you before, your friend has not been cloned, nor is she an imposter. Most likely she’s had some sort of brain injury that’s caused her memories to change.”

“Then how do you explain the missing scars on her wrist?”

“Plastic surgery.”

“Look Mr. Higgins, I have been paying you for five months to track down my friend, I expect you to have found some sort of lead in that all time. She was missing for a month, and you still can’t account for that missing time. Nor, in fact, can she.”

“She said she was in bed sick, there’s no way to argue that when she lives alone.”

This wasn’t the first time we’ve had this argument over the past five months, but it looks like it might be the last if he was quitting.

When I couldn’t get a hold of Ria after three weeks and the police just filled out a piece of paper and didn’t no work into looking into her disappearance, I used my own money to hire a private investigator.

Mr. Higgins had great Google reviews and seemed like he was eager to help me find her.

But when Ria showed up only a week after me hiring him, things took a bit of a turn.

You might ask why I still need a PI if Ria had returned.

But, when I looked at my best friend, the girl I’d known since we were in kindergarten, I knew instantly that something wasn’t right.

There was something different about the look in her eyes, it was like she was looking at a stranger instead of her best friend.

It seemed like she was pretending to know me, and our bond just wasn’t there anymore.

I’ve asked her multiple trick questions about things we’ve shared in the past and every time she’s failed my test.

When I noticed the small scars on her wrist were missing, from the time she fell out of the tree when we were kids, I knew there was something much more serious going on here.

Did I believe that she was a clone? Not really.

But there’s something about this woman that was just screaming at me that she wasn’t my best friend.

I’m absolutely determined to find out where the real Ria had gone.

But we didn’t have anybody else in our lives, so there was nobody else that I could get on my side to help convince Mr. Higgins, or the police, for that matter, that this wasn’t the real Ria.

“What about that business card? The one I had the picture of about granting her greatest wish?” The last conversation I had with her was about a business card that she had found slipped under her door.

It promised to fulfill her greatest wish, and she was going to call them to see what it was about.

I left that day for my three-day horseback riding trip and haven’t heard from her since.

“Ah, yes, well, that is interesting. I looked into the number but it doesn’t belong to anybody. it never belonged to anybody. If she called it, she’d get the same dead tone that you and I get when we tried calling it.”

“That doesn’t make any sense. Why would somebody give her a business card with a number that doesn’t exist?”

“I’m not sure. Maybe some sort of strange prank?

” He leans forward and steeples his fingers where he rests his hands on his desk.

“Look, I’m truly sorry about this, Miss White, there are just no leads left to follow.

There’s literally nothing left for me to do.

And if you do find any more evidence, then please share it with me.

If it’s worth following, then I’ll be happy to pick up the case again.

But until then, I think it’s best that you just move on and try to get to know this new version of her.

Perhaps you’ll find she’s in there, just hiding beneath the surface. ”

I sigh, knowing I’m not going to convince him to do any more. “Thank you, Mr. Higgins.” I leave his office feeling frustrated and desperate. If he wasn’t going to help me, I had to figure out a way to find her myself.

As I arrive back at my apartment and push the door open, a small card on the ground grabs my attention.

I bend down to pick it up, and when I see what’s written on it…

my heart starts hammering in my chest, making me place my free hand over it, as if that will help keep my heart from beating right out of me.

I hold the card up and read the familiar words.

Are you a woman who seeks adventure? Looking for something new, fun and exciting?

Call today to have your greatest wish come true.

1-800-YOU-WISH