Season of Gifts (Neighborly Affection #8)

56. Henry

Chapter fifty-six

Henry

H enry ought to be feeling elation. Years of patience and effort from himself and from Jay, and more recently from Alice, had been necessary to bring Jay to such a monumental breakthrough. Clear-eyed comfort with restraints? The sweet boy he’d rescued so long ago was reclaiming his desires. He’d shattered the prison of memory restraining him. The moment deserved celebration.

But elation hung in a glass sphere, a bright bauble surrounded by the noxious dread, the rolling fog that consumed so much of Henry now. He could lay his hands on the smooth surface, stroke the sleek angles of Jay’s back and hips, but nothing he touched made contact. The sensation existed, yet the feeling of it lay out of reach.

“That’s wonderful, Jay.” His voice echoed in his head; his lips stretched with the surface but not the substance of a smile. “We’ll have much work to do with your cuffs, but I have no doubt we shall achieve that goal. You are an exceptional student, dear boy.”

Jay wriggled and squirmed, his cock rubbing against Henry’s thigh. No fog dampened Jay’s arousal. No stress left him limp and useless. “I could work on earning extra credit, Master Henry.”

Master. A small word, loaded with incalculable meaning. With one word, Jay requested his full attention, proclaimed a need that a dominant worthy of the title could not deny. Jay had every right to need him. Henry had made promises to him from their very first verbal contract, through rewrites and renewals—through the vows he’d spoken to Jay and Alice last month as they cemented their commitment in the presence of family and friends.

“You’ll need every ounce of that energy to satisfy Alice.” He spoke in hushed tones, intimately, his mouth near Jay’s ear as he exhaled slowly down Jay’s neck. All Henry need do was prevent the situation from shifting to the bed. Alice would return in a few moments, and he’d already primed Jay to believe he desired a show from the two of them. Until such time, encouraging Jay to continue talking would forestall sexual escalation. “Tell me more of your reunion. How did you serve her?”

Jay’s hands left their prowling exploration of his chest, and Henry carefully tucked away the blaze of relief. The more Jay touched, the more he might notice his master’s lack of response.

“First I had to strip.” Jay shoved his slacks and boxer-briefs to the floor; his cock sprang up as he disentangled his feet. “On account of the shower.”

“So I see.” He might weep. Henry’s love stood before him, exquisite in every way, his body magnificent, his heart devoted, his eyes sweetly hungering—and nothing stirred but a vague wish for an end to obligations. To have quieted all the calls upon his time and his person, and to rest in the satisfaction of knowing he had accomplished his aims. He walked a slow circle around Jay, keeping his distance. He ought to stroke and pet, to coil his hand around the back of Jay’s neck and drag him near for devouring. But his arms hung like lead weights. “I’ve no doubt she was exceptionally pleased by what she saw.”

Jay ducked his head, his delighted grin aglow at the praise. “I could please you too, Master Henry, if you wanted.”

Alice should have returned by now. What could possibly be taking her so long? Henry passed behind Jay and ghosted a hand across his shoulders. The door remained firmly closed. The hallway runner would muffle approaching footsteps. Soon, though. She would appear soon.

Trembling, Jay stood as still as he ever managed, settling into an inspection pose. He clasped his hands at the base of his spine, perhaps imagining the cuffs he was so eager to wear. “You’ve been taking care of so much, Master Henry. Please let me take care of you.”

“You’ve done an excellent job of that today, as you do every day.” The praise rolled smoothly from his lips; he need only support it with well-chosen examples. “You’ve transformed the music room into the heart of our Christmas. Soon we’ll have even more merriment in the house.” And more strain, if he and Robert tussled over the proper steps to assure Mother’s safety and comfort. “You’ve taken charge of the wedding albums. I applaud your initiative. Curating the photos with you and Alice was a wonderful experience. I am sorry we could not do so in person. You deserve more of me than you’ve had in recent weeks, and I assure you the situation will be rectified.”

“You gave what you could. I know that.” Jay sank to his knees and settled on his heels in a single glorious motion, his knees spread in waiting pose and his hands ever clasped behind him. “Like on our call, when you told me to use my tongue.”

Call, yes. He hummed encouragement and inquiry. Simply keep Jay conversing with him. The call had been days ago, which day?

“I traced your initials, but I imagined your cock.”

Monday. Monday night, late, he’d prioritized Jay’s need for attention and approval after the discovery of the gifts. He’d ordered the collar and cuffs months ago, awaiting the day Jay would be ready for them.

“I imagined thanking you.”

And now the joyous occasion came to memory bounded by the contours of a phone screen and superseded by the terror of a few hours later. By Mother’s desperate breaths and panicked eyes as she nearly died in front of him. Was that worse than the ragdoll limbs and slack face he’d gathered in his arms the first time? His hands shook; he clenched them tightly.

“If you wanted—”

The damnable door stayed shut. Something had gone wrong. Alice’s phone lay on the nightstand; could she even call 911 if she needed to? He wouldn’t hear her shouts from this end of the house.

“—I could thank you now, Master Henry.”

Hands touched the front of his pajamas, cupping an erection that didn’t exist. He pushed the hands away and stumbled back, the waistband rebounding against his skin.

“Stop. Did I ask for such a service? Must sex be the focal point for every interaction?” But to not be aroused for his sweet submissive. And for Jay to know it, to feel the lack of desire he was owed. The fog chilled his bones, beaded on his skin, clammy and rank with shame. “Wait here while I see what’s keeping Alice.”

He put the door between them and buttoned his shirt with shaking fingers. The hallway stretched like a rubber band, a funhouse mirror of distortion. He started for Mother’s door, each stride picking up speed. Please. Please let his selfishness and distraction not have cost him her life.