Chapter 12
CHAPTER 12
Joan Malone was a coward. A lying, villainous asshole of a coward. Because she couldn’t tell Sadie the truth.
Even though they were enjoying a lovely impromptu Thursday morning brunch, reality screamed at her from all sides. The apartment paid for with ill-gotten funds, the keypad on her office door in her periphery, the picture of her and Mark and Perry on their annual blowout Christmas trip to the Caribbean stuck to the side of the fridge.
And Sadie sitting with her socked feet on the bottom rung of Joan’s barstool, nibbling on eggy frittata, happiness personified as they chatted about Sadie’s Café. Thinking she was hanging out with the most noble Superhero around.
Joan had tried to tell her yesterday. She really had. But then Sadie saw her rescue that little dog, and kissed her soundly, and made Joan forget for a few moments that she wasn’t heroic. She didn’t want the admiration shining in Sadie’s brown eyes to dim.
Sadie thought of Spark the way all norms did. Not like Joan could say I’m actually the scary menace you’re afraid of . The new plan was to show her all Villains weren’t bad. That Spark was no saint, but not a fire-breathing monster.
Joan tipped her tall coffee mug back to catch the last drops of the cappuccino Sadie had infused with cinnamon and nutmeg. “You definitely need to put this on the menu.”
“It’s similar to a seasonal offering at VCC,” Sadie said. “I use a lot of pumpkin spice syrup in the fall and winter.”
“You could do this one for the holidays. Add a little gingerbread man cookie to the mug.”
“Oh, wait until you see what I whip up around the holidays.” She waggled her eyebrows.
“Looking forward to it,” Joan said, squeezing Sadie’s thigh through her green pants.
Sadie rested her hand on Joan’s. “My latte art gets very yuletide-y.”
Lacing their fingers, Joan said, “Will you show me how to do latte art tomorrow? Brunch date at your place?”
“Sure.”
They shared a smile, then turned back to their plates, still holding hands. “I can picture how Sadie’s Café would look in the fall and winter,” Joan said.
“So cozy. I’d switch out the pillows and some décor for rich earthy tones and leaves. And lots of twinkle lights in the winter. Not that we have cold winters, but I want to make it feel like you’re stepping out of the snow into a warm, woodsy cottage.”
“I love that. We should be taking notes for all this stuff.”
Sadie made a vague shrug, focusing on her piece of sourdough toast. Her phone chimed on the island countertop with a new text. She glanced at it, groan-grumbling.
“More crime?” Joan guessed.
“Mom wants to make sure I got the links to the articles. All three of them.” Sadie rolled her eyes.
Her mom had been texting about recent crimes in Vector City. A news item about the art museum robbery the other night, one about a sculpture stolen from the front yard of a historic home, another about an art gallery that got hit last night. Joan hadn’t been aware of the last two.
“Let me text her really quick so she knows I’m okay.” Sadie slipped her fingers free. “I try not to complain because I know my parents mean well.”
It seemed more like they were smothering her, but what did Joan know about a good parent/child relationship? From the way Sadie acted with each message, it was clear she was being sensitive to Joan’s strained parental situation, which was thoughtful.
As Sadie typed, Joan checked her phone. Nothing new under Mark’s last text.
P never came home last night. Still not home unless he’s taking one of his epic dead to the world naps.
Perry had done his usual disappearing act. That wasn’t unusual when he didn’t want to face someone or something. He knew Joan was mad at him for doing the museum heist despite not wanting to be seen around town with Melvin and Company. If he was out there doing jobs with—or worse, for Melvin…
It was going to be damn near impossible to get him to cut back or lay low. And no way would he do anything to help the Supers. Perry didn’t have a different dream to pursue. Stealing a VanderHooven was his dream. She and Mark couldn’t foist their dream upon him if he didn’t want it.
Sadie pushed her phone across the island. “I told her I’m having brunch with a friend so she’ll hopefully get the hint.”
Speaking of dreams… “Did you tell her we’re talking about Sadie’s Café?”
“There’s no point. She doesn’t think it’s real.”
“You know what you’re doing, and you’re really excited about it. I’d say that’s as real as anything.”
“Yeah, but…” Sadie wrinkled her nose. “I haven’t done anything about it in thirty-four years. I can’t blame my family for thinking I never will.”
“There’s no timetable for these things. I’m thirty-five and considering a career change.”
“I know,” she sighed.
“Listen. This was delicious.” Joan touched her empty mug, then nodded at the fridge. “And you made that cold brew chilling in there that smells like vanilla paradise. You’re teaching me about tasty beverages. I can tell it’s your passion.”
“It’s nothing, really,” Sadie said, staring at her lap. “I’d rather talk about your food truck.”
“We’ve talked plenty about that. Today’s about you and your dreams.”
“That’s just it. A far-fetched dream.”
“What you want is important,” Joan told her. “Don’t discount it because you think it’s not possible. I can help you figure out the business part of things. The loans and money stuff. We can learn about it together. But honestly, you already know way more than you’re giving yourself credit for.”
Sadie wrapped loose arms around Joan’s torso. “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
“No really, thank you.” She dropped a quick kiss on her lips. “You make me feel like it could be possible.”
“Good. That’s our deal.” Joan tucked Sadie’s hair behind her shoulders. Her insides twisted at the fact that she was also making today about Sadie to take the focus off herself. It’d been just boring old Joanie with no discussion of the Supers. The normalcy she’d been craving for so long. How could she give that up?
A shy smile spread across Sadie’s beautiful face. “I don’t talk about my café with anyone. Not even my friends. But I like talking about it with you.”
“I’m here whenever you want to toss ideas around.” Joan ran a thumb down Sadie’s cheek. “And for taste-testing.”
Her grin intensified, warming Joan’s heart. “It’s so nice to trust each other with our secrets.”
Joan wrenched her lips up and forced out, “Yeah.”
Sadie kissed her cheek before sliding off her barstool with a sad sigh.
“Do you need to get going?” Joan said.
“Soon. Thursdays are pretty busy. It’s Amit’s day off, and I’m de facto in charge when he’s not there. But I’ll help you clean up.”
She stood, too. “Don’t worry about it. I toss everything in the dishwasher.”
“Then I’ll help you toss everything in the dishwasher so you can walk me to work.”
Sadie tilted her head up, signaling she didn’t have to leave just yet. Joan took her time meeting her for a soft kiss. God, she could kiss Sadie for a decade straight and not get tired of it. Their kisses weren’t the usual feverish rush toward getting naked. They were for fun, for exploration.
For Joan, not Spark.
She kissed Sadie deeper, their tongues meeting with equal need. The heat that rushed through her body wasn’t fire. It was sweeter, lighter. Something like delight. Joy. Excitement at a true connection. She had no doubt Sadie sex would be amazing sex, but it was okay to wait and enjoy the anticipation.
Sadie hummed, pressing her fantastic breasts into Joan’s. Ooookay, now the heat was turning molten with desire.
“Dishes,” Sadie moaned miserably. “Day job.”
“Boo.”
They slowly separated, letting their fingers linger as long as possible. As they gathered the dirty dishes, Sadie’s phone chimed. She read the screen, shaking her head. “I swear, next she’ll tell me our near record number of days without rain is a result of Super activity.”
“We don’t control the weather,” Joan said. “At least not the Vector City Supers. Oceanview has Ether, that one Villain who can manipulate clouds and moisture in the atmosphere.”
His name was Derek and he was kind of a tool, but he threw kickass parties on the beach.
“My family’s part of that group of people I told you about,” Sadie said. “The ones who think Supers are overrated and destructive and are why it’s so dangerous in the city. My mom especially doesn’t trust them. Well, you.”
Joan carried her plate and mug toward the dishwasher. “I don’t blame them.”
“She’s gotten more paranoid since Lunk crashed into VCC. Apparently, I work at the most dangerous coffee shop in the world.”
“I mean…” She couldn’t help snorting. “You kind of do.”
“Don’t you start,” Sadie laughed.
Because she was genuinely curious, and also as a temperature check, Joan asked, “What would your parents think about you hanging out with one of those people ?”
Sadie set her dishes on the countertop. “They’d probably jump in the car and try to drag me back to West Vector. But I wouldn’t go. I’m safe with you.”
Shiiiiiit. But hey, even if she was Catch, Sadie’s parents wouldn’t like her. So that was something.
“I look out for the people I care about,” Joan said. That much was true.
She went back for their water glasses. Her phone lit up with a text from Mark. One to both her and Perry.
Perry where the fuck are you?????
She shook her head hard enough for Sadie to notice. “Oh no. Is my mom texting you now?” she teased.
“It’s from Mark.”
“Better a text than having him interrupt another date.”
“I should warn you that’ll happen again. Mark stops by all the time.”
“If he wants to hang out with us, that’d be fine. I’d like to get to know him better. He’s so important to you.”
“Yeah, he’s…”
He’s your brother. She doesn’t even know he’s your damn brother.
Maybe the truth could come out in bits and pieces. Chip away at the lies. She could get one out, then lead to more important ones.
Joan set the glasses next to the dirty plates. “I have to tell you something.”
“Okay.” Concern filled Sadie’s eyes.
Drawing in a deep, steadying breath, Joan said, “Mark isn’t my cousin. He’s actually my brother. My twin brother.”
“Oh.”
“We keep it a secret for both our safety. No one needs to know we’re twins, or even that we’re siblings. I didn’t want to lie to you, but we don’t tell anyone other than people who know us really well.”
“Oh,” Sadie said again. She gradually nodded. “Okay. That makes sense. His eyes are like yours. Is he?—”
“He’s not a Superhero.” Joan was quick to quell that notion.
“Okay. You keep it under wraps. I get it. Now I see how Mark’s connected. Thanks for telling m—” Sadie’s eyes widened. “Wait. Then it was just your parents who kicked you out?”
“Yeah.”
“Both of you?”
A twinge squeezed Joan’s heart. “Yep.”
“Wow. Two kids.” Sadie took a step closer and set her cool fingers on Joan’s forearm. “Do you have any other siblings?”
“No, it’s just us.”
“Your parents sent their only two kids away?” She shook her head in disbelief. “Wow. I mean… Wow. No wonder you don’t talk to them.”
“The only slightly good thing was that Mark and I had each other. When I say we’ve been through everything together, I mean everything . I…” Old, familiar pain coursed through Joan’s veins. “I still feel guilty for what happened.”
“Why?”
“The equipment shed thing was my fault. Getting expelled. I took away his future without giving him a choice.”
Sadie sucked in a small gasp. “Joan. That wasn’t your fault. You were kids. You didn’t know how to control your abilities.”
“Consciously, I know the adults around me failed us. But that doesn’t take away the sting. It’s why I’m protective of him.”
“You were protecting him even then.”
“Yeah,” Joan said. “He was the one who first thought about a food truck. I think part of why I want to do it is because he really wants to. I do, too, but I want to do it for him as much as for me.”
Rubbing her arm, Sadie said, “He’s lucky to have such a caring sister.”
“I’m lucky to have him.”
Joan welcomed the hug Sadie enveloped her in. She rested her chin against Sadie’s temple, soothed by her embrace, her compassion. It felt good to talk to someone about this.
“I’m so glad you have each other,” Sadie said, and squeezed tighter.
“Me, too.”
She pulled back enough to give Joan a small smile. “I bet you’re the older twin.”
“I am. By eight minutes.”
“Thank god. I’m a much better match for oldest kids. I’m the youngest and used to being spoiled and getting exactly what I want.”
Humor brimmed in Sadie’s coffee-colored eyes, and she was visibly trying not to laugh. But the levity was nice, and the idea of giving her everything she wanted was pretty damn appealing. It helped tamp down the nerves over trusting her with some serious inside information.
Maybe it was a mistake to tell her about Mark, but she wanted Sadie to know. Wanted her to know everything.
“I hope I can spoil you as much as you’ve been spoiling me,” Joan said, massaging Sadie’s lower back.
“I hope…” Sadie tiptoed up to nuzzle Joan’s nose. “We can spoil one another.” She glanced behind Joan. “Shoot. I need to get going.”
“I can drive you if you’re worried you’ll be late.”
Sliding back, Sadie said, “As long as we leave, like, now, we’re good.”
Well, crap. Not like Joan could toss out By the way, funny story about my secret identity. Have fun at work!
They headed for the island to grab their phones and keys. She’d finally gotten a text from Perry.
Went out of town. Will explain later. Job tomorrow night. N?o se preocupe.
He only told them not to worry when he meant it.
A job tomorrow night. Probably selling some of that art he stole. Not that she wanted any part of it, but for Perry, it could be her last job. Mark’s last job.
Spark and Ice’s last job.
“I’m officially a fan of your frittata,” Sadie said, strolling toward the door.
“I’m officially a fan of Sadie Eagan.”
“Well, aren’t you cute, Joan Malone?” She grinned as Joan joined her. Damn, she was adorable.
Hmm. Spark and Ice’s last job.
They exited the apartment. Easing into more truth-telling, Joan said, “So what do you really think about my wanting to change careers?”
Sadie cocked her head, taking her time before answering. “Can you walk away from what you’re doing? Like, can you stop doing it?”
“I don’t know,” Joan answered honestly. “Could I stop cold turkey? I’d like to think so, but…”
“Sorry, I meant are you allowed to retire? I know”—Sadie mouthed the word Supers —“retire when they get old. Are you allowed to step away while you’re still in your prime?”
“Yeah. I mean, nobody’s beholden to anything. The nice thing about having an alter ego is you can just stop being them and be your true self.”
“Maybe you can cut back your hours? Go part-time?” She giggled. “Part-time crime fighter sounds like someone who dons a cape and tights and patrols their neighborhood in their spare time.”
There was one thing Joan was fairly certain about. “If I stop, I have to stop completely. Make a clean break. It’d be too easy to slip back into that life.”
A neighbor approached with two bags of groceries. They exchanged hellos with the tall person rocking an all-denim ensemble.
Once they were out of earshot, Sadie said, “I imagine it’d be hard to walk away in times of need. Maybe you could be around for, like, the really big stuff. When the you-know-whos are really wreaking havoc.”
“Hopefully, what I’m working on will put a stop to most of the havoc.”
“That would be great.”
Going for a joke, Joan said, “Then I can just save the occasional dog, or a cat up a tree.”
Sadie gave her a close-mouthed smile. “You do so much more than that. You literally save people’s lives.”
“That’s a bit extreme.”
“Don’t be so modest.” She leaned into Joan’s side. “I saw you save a busload of children from an oncoming train. You’re a hero.”
Shit. That’d been the biggest win of Catch’s career. Even Joan had to admit she’d been impressed by Darlene’s heroics. “I didn’t do that,” she whispered.
“Well, okay, if you want to get technical, Race pushed the school bus off the tracks. But you stopped the train.”
Her stomach bottomed out. Fuck. “I didn’t do that.”
Sadie held her palms out. “I don’t want you to think I’m a superfan or anything. I’m kind of embarrassed to admit this, but I’ve had a huge crush on you for years. Ever since I saw you do that. I was there.”
Shit fucking shit. That was why she was so excited about Joan being Catch.
Joan paused a few feet from the elevators. Dread swam around her head, making her a little dizzy. “Sadie…”
“I know, I know.” Sadie bit her lower lip. “You’re used to people gushing about how much they adore you. You’ve probably gotten marriage proposals.”
“No, it’s?—”
“I really do like you. Please don’t think I’m only interested in that other thing. You trusted me enough to tell me about Mark. I hope you know I’m totally here for you. You can trust me.”
“I do.”
The but sat on Joan’s lips, a breath away from letting the truth out.
But you shouldn’t trust me.
Something passed over Sadie’s face. Like she sensed the but . One of her eyebrows scrunched lower as she studied Joan.
This was it. The door was open. She had to push through and accept the consequences for once in her goddamn life.
Sadie’s expression softened. “It makes you uncomfortable to talk about this, doesn’t it? That’s a whole other world, and I get the feeling you don’t like your worlds to intertwine.”
The words lodged in Joan’s throat. I’m not Catch. I’m a big-ass liar.
“It’s okay. Really. We can stick to talking about the world I’m in. I’ll stop embarrassing you.”
“You’re not. It’s just… I’m not who you think I am.”
“You think I’ve built you up in my head all these years,” Sadie said.
“No, you see the Supers how most people see them.”
“Your concern’s not unwarranted. I tend to leap headfirst into relationships. One of us should be cautious.”
“Don’t put this on you,” Joan said.
“Let’s do this right. Or at least try to do it right. Foodie Joan and barista Sadie, hanging out and eating a lot of really good food.”
She brushed her fingertips down Sadie’s cheek. “That’s exactly what I want,” Joan murmured.
Sadie had given her the perfect out. Not talking about Supers? Done. Focusing on what was brewing between them? Done and done.
Now would be a great time for an interruption. Another neighbor, or an elevator arriving. Or a text. Anything so Joan wouldn’t feel so damn guilty.
The seconds ticked by.
Sadie laced their fingers together. “I also hope to do other things,” she said.
“Adult things?” Joan said.
“Mm-hmm.”
“Yes, please.”
A beautiful, wide smile graced Sadie’s face, and goddamn, Joan couldn’t do it. She was a shit. She was a giant pile of shit.
The only way out of this was to get out of villainy. She could come clean after the fact.
Sadie squeezed her hand, then tugged her toward the elevators. Joan blew out a shaky breath. To be fair, she had tried to tell her. Had actually said the words I’m not who you think I am. Sadie could have asked for an explanation.
At this point, she wasn’t even sure Sadie would believe her. She was so hung up on all things Catch, she’d probably view it as Joan just being modest. Or protecting the Supers the way she protected Mark. It was kind of impressive how Sadie had such a one-track mind.
Sadie’s phone trilled with a different text tone than before. She pulled it out of her back pocket. “It’s work. Jeez, sorry for all the interruptions today.”
“It’s okay.”
“Tomorrow, can we silence our phones and not look at them?” She glanced up with intent. “I want to focus on you and me.”
“You and me,” Joan echoed.
She could absolutely focus on just the two of them.