Chapter 2
Floyd dropped to his knees. “Liz! Liz! Can you hear me?”
Ahhh. Liz let out a whisper of breath, her eyelids fluttering.
Floyd patted his wife’s cheeks, raising his voice as he called her name. Unable to muster more than a garbled response, he ran to the kitchen sink and turned the faucet on.
It made a hissing noise and sputtered. Drops of yellow water trickled out and splashed into the grimy sink basin.
Liz stirred.
“Hang on, Liz. Don’t move.” With renewed resolve, Floyd twisted the faucet knobs, turning both on full force until a steady stream of brownish-yellow water gushed out. He fished a cloth handkerchief from his pocket, ran it under the water and hurried to his wife’s side where he dabbed the wet kerchief on her forehead and cheeks.
“What…what?”
“You saw a dead raccoon on the basement steps and hit the floor,” Floyd said.
“Where am I?”
“In our new home.”
Liz let out a low moan. “I remember now. The crumbling chateau.”
“It’s not crumbling. This place is solid and has good bones. It just needs a little fixing up.” Floyd helped his wife to a sitting position, keeping the cool rag against her forehead. “I’ll take care of the critter. Will you be okay for a second?”
“I would be even better if we left and never came back. ”
Floyd grinned. “You must be feeling better. You haven’t lost your sense of humor.”
Liz gingerly scooched against the wall, watching as her husband ran out of the house. He promptly returned, dustpan and broom in hand, scooped up the raccoon’s remains and hustled back out.
Chirp. Liz’s cell phone chimed. She snatched it from her designer bag and glanced at the screen. “Great,” she groaned as she hit the “answer” button. “Hello, Gloria.”
“Hello, Liz,” her sister’s cheerful voice echoed back. “I thought you were stopping by to grab the cooler of fish Paul promised Floyd.”
“We got sidetracked.”
“You sound cranky,” Gloria said. “Let me guess…Floyd’s surprise wasn’t a good one.”
“That would be an understatement. Do you remember the old television show, Green Acres? ”
There was a moment of silence on the other end of the line. “Green Acres as in New York socialite moves to falling-down-farm starring Eva Gabor?”
“Bingo. Except you can replace falling-down-farm with crumbling chateau…er…slash farm. The house has an identity crisis.”
“I…”
Liz could hear her sister laughing. “It’s not funny. Floyd told Treece he could move into our house and we’re moving in here.”
“Where is here?”
“On the other side of Green Springs.” Liz lifted a shaky hand, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “I’m almost wishing he would’ve bought that dump over on Bass Lake.”
“That cottage had a lot of potential,” Gloria said.
“It was move-in ready compared to this place.” Liz removed the cloth Floyd had placed on her forehead and dropped it on the windowsill. “I can’t live here.”
“It can’t be that bad. Besides, you and Floyd have plenty of money to fix it up to your high standards. What’s the address?”
“One, two, three I’m not moving here lane.”
“You’re such a drama queen.”
“You haven’t seen it. Picture acres of land with rolling hills, a bunch of dilapidated buildings, throw in a mobile home and a crumbling chateau and it would be pretty close.” Liz could hear her voice raise an octave as pure panic set in. “There are dead creatures on the premises.”
Quick steps grew louder, and Floyd appeared in the doorway. “I thought I heard voices.”
“I’m talking to Gloria.”
“I need to run back to the house to grab some tools.”
“Wonderful. I’m ready to leave. ”
Gloria cut in. “I’m free and dying to see the place.”
“Floyd has to run home.”
“Perfect. I can stop by while he’s gone.”
Liz rattled off the address. “You wouldn’t happen to have a hazmat suit lying around, would you?”
Gloria chuckled. “I’ll be there in less than twenty minutes. I don’t have a hazmat suit, but I’ll bring the fish.”
The call ended, and Liz waved her phone in the air. “Gloria is on her way. She’s bringing the fish we were going to pick up.”
“That’s mighty kind of her.”
A sudden burning sensation radiated across Liz’s forehead. She ran a light hand across it, noting several small welts. “My forehead is burning and I’m developing some sort of rash.”
Floyd’s eyes widened as he stared at his wife. He reached for the handkerchief Liz had placed on the windowsill. “It must be from the water I got out of the sink.”
Liz fumbled inside her purse and pulled out a compact. She flipped it open and peered at her reflection. “Look at my skin. I’m welting.”
“It’s better than melting.”
“What did you do to me?” she wailed.
“The water was only a little yellow.”
“A little yellow.” Liz scrambled to her feet and ran to the sink.
Floyd hurried after her. “Don’t…”
Liz turned the faucet on.
“…turn that on.”
Droplets of brown water trickled out. Horrified, she could feel her stomach churn. “You put this water on my face?”
“I let it run clear…clearer. I’m sorry, Liz. ”
She gritted her teeth, teetering between storming out and slugging her husband. She did neither. Instead, she shot daggers at him.
“There’s bottled water in the truck. We’ll get it cleaned up right away.” Floyd guided Liz out of the house. He snatched a stack of fast-food napkins from the truck’s center console, doused them with water and dabbed at her forehead.
“It’s feeling better.”
Floyd’s shoulders slumped. “Buying this place was a big mistake. I let you down. I’ll put it on the market and get rid of it.” He turned to go, and Liz stopped him. “I don’t want you to do that. I’m sorry I had a meltdown and for being such a party pooper.”
“I know the place needs some work. I should have told you about it sooner, but I was afraid you would hate it.”
“I don’t hate it. I mean, I probably won’t always hate it.” Liz placed a light hand on her husband’s cheek. “I know I’m not always easy to live with and have high standards. I’ll try to focus on the positives of this chateau farm.”
“That’s all I ask.” Floyd pulled Liz into his arms. “By the time we’re done, you’re going to love it.”
A pristine 1989 Mercury Grand Marquis crept down the driveway. Gloria sprang from the vehicle and was joined by her springer spaniel, Mally. “I hope you don’t mind. I brought Mally with me.”
“Not at all.” Floyd gave the pup a pat on the head. “I was thinking once Liz and I are settled, we could get a dog of our own.”
Gloria reached inside the car, grabbed a small Styrofoam cooler and handed it to Floyd. “These are the fish Paul promised.”
“Thanks. I can’t wait to fry up a batch.” Floyd set the cooler in the bed of his pickup. “I need to run home and grab some tools. The outdoor faucet won’t stop leaking. ”
“I’ll hang out here with Liz until you come back,” Gloria promised.
“I won’t be long.” Floyd gave his wife a quick kiss before climbing into his truck and driving off.
“Well?” Liz asked. “What do you think?”
Gloria spun in a slow circle. “How much land is there?”
“Too much. I’ll show you the crown jewel of this place.” Liz tiptoed around a mud puddle. “The driveway and sidewalk need work, along with everything else.”
“The place has potential.”
“Potentially demolished, razed, torched. Floyd promised to bring it up to my standards, but it’s going to take some time…time we don’t have since he’s offered our house to Treece.”
“I thought he already lived on the farm.”
“He moved away and now he’s coming back. ”
Gloria’s eyes twinkled with mischief. “So you’re moving in here soon?”
“In a few weeks.” Liz blew air through thinned lips. “We have all this money sitting in the bank collecting dust. Meanwhile, Floyd has it in his head that he wants us to live here. He thinks there might be more natural gas rights to sell.”
“Ka-ching,” Gloria said. “He’s a smart man.”
“With absolutely no sense of style and only a smidgen of good taste.”
“He married you, didn’t he?”
Liz wagged a meticulously manicured nail in her sister. “You know what I mean.”
Gloria frowned. “What happened to your forehead?”
“Floyd put putrid water on my face after I passed out.”
“Oh, dear. ”
“Oh, dear is right. I may be scarred for life,” Liz said dramatically.
Gloria pointed to an ATV parked nearby. “Why don’t you show me around?”
“There’s nothing to see. This falling down French disaster is going to be my home and there are dead creatures decaying inside.”
Gloria ignored Liz’s whining. “I see a key. I’ll drive.”
“I know how to.” Liz hurried to the driver’s side while Gloria hopped in beside her.
She fired it up and swung in a wide circle, making her way along the edge of the weed-infested yard. They jostled past a bladeless windmill and a trio of crumbling silos just steps away from a big, red barn.
The double doors hung haphazardly while tall weeds, matching the ones near the front gate, grew along the front. Beyond the barn was a hill and when they reached the top, it offered an expansive view of the fields for as far as the eye could see.
To the right was a single-wide mobile home sporting a spacious wooden deck. A flower garden, unkempt but in full bloom, gave the home a cozy feel.
“This looks nice,” Gloria said.
Liz wrinkled her nose.
“It’s in good condition. Let’s check it out.”
They crossed the deck, making their way to the front door. “It’s unlocked.” Liz eased the door open and peered inside. “Yep. It’s a trailer.”
She took a step back, nearly colliding with Gloria, who was standing directly behind her.
“Don’t you want to look around?”
“No.”
Gloria propelled her forward. “What if it’s in better shape than the house? You can live here during renovations. ”
“Don’t you dare even suggest that to Floyd,” Liz snapped. “He’ll have us sleeping here tonight.”
“It’s cozy.”
Liz reluctantly followed behind. “Meaning small.”
The women toured the back and then retraced their steps, passing through the living room, dining area, a second bathroom and main bedroom at the other end.
“It’s in excellent condition.”
“For someone else. Not me.” Liz’s cell phone chimed. She glanced at the screen and shoved it back in her purse. “Our furniture won’t fit in here.”
“You could store your furniture in the barn.”
“In the barn?” Liz’s eyes widened in horror. “And put my beautiful new full grain leather sofa and matching chairs in there for birds to poop on? I would rather stay put and live with Treece.”
“It’s an option. How do you two get along? ”
“He seems nice enough, but I wasn’t serious. We’re a newly married couple and need our space.”
“Maybe Treece can stay put until the chateau reaches your exacting high standards,” Gloria teased.
“Already tried. He’s moving in regardless of our housing arrangements.”
“What about an extended vacation while this place is being fixed up?”
Liz made a thumbs down. “I love the vacation part. What if we come back and the renovations aren’t what I want? I need to be nearby to supervise.”
“You could find one of those furnished rent-by-the-week places, move into this mobile home or move into the house.”
Liz clutched her stomach. “I don’t like any of those options. I’m wishing I’d never moved out of Margaret’s lakefront rental. ”
The women exited the home and finished the tour, during which Liz picked apart every single thing they saw. Gloria was more in line with Floyd’s vision and could easily see the potential of the place.
She thought about how they’d met the Rasmussens, not long after Floyd and his family had hired their friend Lucy to teach a gun safety class. A death in the family led to a murder investigation involving Lucy. “With enough cash, this place could be an elegant home.”
Liz waited for Gloria to climb back in and then they returned to their starting point. “This concludes our tour of the ruins.”
“Future home.” Gloria noticed a small farmhouse across the street. A pole barn and pasture were directly behind it. “There’s another home over there. I didn’t notice it on the way in.”
“You’re right.” Liz craned her neck. “There’s a woman standing on the front porch watching us. ”
Gloria squinted her eyes and followed her sister’s gaze. “You have a neighbor.”
“A nosy one at that.”