Chapter 38
Kehtal moved restlessly back and forth through the central room of their nest, his gavo and wings twitching and snapping anxiously. He was aware of the fact that he was wearing a grooved path back and forth across the center of the room, but it gave him an odd satisfaction that marring the floor was at least a protest that would have some lasting effect unless stoneworkers were brought to smooth and re-level the entire floor of the nest. As it stood, his path stood out bleakly and angrily against the rest of the cave floor, matching his mood and the resentment boiling within his stomach.
It was unequal, however, to the frustration that beat at him, mocking him for his weakness. A weakness that he only felt trapped in the shinara. He had never felt weak and insignificant in the upper caverns where his speed served him well in fighting off territory rivals with Daskh. Nor had he felt puny in the colony where his smaller size was still larger than most of the offworlders who made Raza their home. He certainly never felt out of place or demeaned within his nest, either. Although he lacked the size and strength of his nestmates, they had never made him feel inferior. He was no less of a mate to their ashlava. Only the shinara could make him feel as if he were nothing.
He spun with a snarl and whipped his tail at a delicately carved platter, sending it crashing into the wall. Its satisfying shatter echoed through the room and his gaze promptly searched for another target to vent his anger upon.
“You are quickly running out of things to break,” Daskh pointed out from the dark corner near the entrance where he was coiled in wait for anyone foolish enough to approach their nest.
Kehtal huffed as he peered at the mess littering the perimeter of the room from the various things he had flung against the walls. Daskh was not wrong. It had taken him less than three days confined in their nest to steadily break everything within sight whenever he needed to soothe his nerves. Queen Zathexa said their mate was dead, but his body did not heed mere words. It screamed persistently with the prolonged separation.
Sagging onto a large cushion, he stared bleakly in the direction of the sleeping chamber. It was all wrong. Their nest felt too empty. Quiet. Even Hashal was silent. They could barely coax a few handfuls of words at a time from the nestling before the little male curled into a ball and closed his eyes in his little nest, wrapped in Lori’s clothes that she had set aside to clean. Kehtal didn’t know if he truly slept or simply drifted through his own thoughts and memories, unable to tolerate the world without his mother.
“This cannot go on,” he muttered, casting a hopeless to his nest brother.
Daskh rumbled in agreement but said nothing, his green eyes closing as his ears fanned. He was ignoring Kehtal in favor of listening intently to the activity outside of their nest, but he could hardly fault him for it. Everything in their nest brought memories of their ashlava to mind as if she had only been gone for a moment. It was painful to look upon. It was not personal against him.
He closed his eyes, retreating inwardly. After all, why not? Daskh and Hashal had the right idea. Rather than make himself insane like a trapped animal, he could at least find Lori within himself. If she were truly dead as the queen said, at least he would always have her there. His need to find her remains and provide her with the proper ceremonies to secure her place within the heavenly court of Shangla was more his selfish desire to find a form of peace. Until then, this was all he had even if it slowly broke his heart more and more.
He drifted with her, sinking into his mate’s embrace within his mind and the memory of her sweet smile when she looked up at him with all her love bright in her eyes. Her voice whispered through him, caressing him. He shivered with happiness and yet his sorrow grew and grew. It was not real. She was like smoke drifting through his fingers, a formless spirit that only lived in his thoughts.
A violent rattling sound broke through the air, fragmenting and chasing away the memory of her from his mind. Kehtal jerked, his eyes snapping open, in recognition of the sound and his head whirled toward his nest brother as Daskh drew himself aggressively to his full height, his wings rattling angrily. The male’s head turned toward the entrance and the entirety of his attention focused there.
“You dare to enter,” he hissed.
“Peace, Daskh,” a voice whispered in reply. “I am here to help. Jathella sent me.” The shadows moved, and from the obscure edge of the entrance, a female drew forward, her pale blue scales unmistakable and luminous within the light of their nest.
“And why should we trust the help of Jathella, Kitanara?” Daskh replied.
The female’s head cocked, a fleeting smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “Because you have few who are on your side. Who else would you trust for assistance than those who have nestling bonds with Slengral?”
“You will help?” Kehtal rasped, his heart lifting frantically within his chest. He did not care if there was some chance of being a trap. He needed to break free from the shinara and search for Lori.
She inclined her head, her gavo rising and snapping firmly. “Buosoa is already securing a cleared route for you, while I cover the path behind you. Slengral will be more difficult to remove from the palace, but we ask that you follow Buosoa. Jathella and Slengral will meet you in a few solar rotations.”
“You took our mate out there,” Daskh reminded her as he settled back on his coils, his expression shifting to a hard mask. “You left her to die on the sands without protection.”
A look of guilt crept over Kitanara’s face, and her head dropped. “We cannot dispute that we acted on orders. There was no way to know that Payeri would betray the queen. There is no other reason that we can accept. We know that your mate would not have yielded. She would not have allowed Payeri to leave her there, knowing what her fate would be.” Her gavo rippled. “And we do not agree with the queen matriarch’s decision to keep you trapped within the shinara. We understand her reasoning, but it is wrong and cruel to you, and to the male that we called our brother.”
Daskh’s gaze swung to Kehtal and met his eyes. The male’s gavo quivered in a wordless question and Kehtal responded with the faintest of snaps of his own gavo in agreement. They would trust her—for now.
“We will go,” Kehtal affirmed aloud.
Daskh’s gavo snapped as he rolled swiftly where he was coiled. “I will get Hashal.”
The male disappeared from the room with surprising speed for a male of his size and bulk. A soft murmur of voices could be heard drifting up from the sleeping chamber. Kehtal’s ears fanned as he listened in. Daskh was reassuring the nestling and he immediately felt guilty that he had not considered doing that. He had been prepared to leave with little thought to how frightened it would make their offspring. Daskh seemed to calm him quickly, however, as he emerged within minutes with the nestling wrapped tightly in a torn blanket tied securely to his chest. Kitanara’s brow rose in surprise, but Daskh gave the bundle a gentle pat as a faint smile flickered over his face.
“It is something that Lori once mentioned for transporting vulnerable younglings,” he murmured.
“Very practical,” the female praised, and her gaze flitted between them. “We are ready then?”
Kehtal looked back over at Kitanara and inclined his head. “Show us the way, quickly.”
Her gavo snapped and she whirled around, her wings open slightly to help her sail in a tight circle smoothly as she bent low over her coils. Then she was shooting forward with a startling agility that had Kehtal snap his wings in response to send him skimming over the nest’s floor after her. The beat of Daskh’s large wings as his nest brother followed was deafening but welcome as they swooped quickly from their nest, breaking out into the silent greater cavern of the shinara. All was startling silent beneath them, and Kehtal craned his head as they winged their way over the buildings stretched out beneath them.
Should they not have some opposition? Or at least have some outcry from those dwelling within the shinara?
Kitanara peered back at him over her shoulder and opened her wings wider so that she shot up a little, but slowed so that she could drop down again between him and Daskh, forcing his nest brother to bank to the side to avoid collision. She murmured an apology and glanced at both of them grimly, her amber eyes flashing.
“We must hurry. Buosoa is waiting just beyond the gates. This is only working because we are in the late hours of the morning, but we must clear enough distance before the sun rises too high and forces us to the ground.”
Kehtal frowned and drew air through his ethin and nearly fell from the air when he registered the ganda. He thought the female was exaggerating but the dry heat searing his ethin not only confirmed what she said but set him in opposition to everything he was taught from a nestling that told him it was a dangerous hour to rise to the surface. He panted in exertion and his head swung toward Daskh, searching for comfort.
The male was likewise breathing roughly through his open mouth, his body trembling as they pushed themselves to a quicker pace, his large handle clasping the bundle against his chest even more securely as they flew as his other hand stroked it reassuringly. Hashal was frightened but he had Daskh caring for him. Good.
The shinara rushed beneath them as they swept over it with wings stretched wide to take maximum advantage of the light currents of air that existed so deeply within the caverns. They were like gorshiga haunting the death hours of the day, the phantom wings beating through the air, no doubt frightening any hatchlings that were still awake within their beds. He smiled grimly at the thought. They might as well be gorshiga. What they were doing was in direct disobedience against the orders of the queen matriarch. It would mean death if they were ever caught.
Somehow that thought sent fire to something deep within him that began to burn gleefully. They were not simply leaving as they had the first time and abandoning their territories within the upper caverns, they were willfully cutting off ties with the shinara and all it represented, and it never felt better. It was as if they were finally escaping the clutches of a nestling’s nightmare. The buildings and spires were passing by them like vague impressions of sleeping shadows, and the palace was a slumbering creature of monstrous proportions looming behind them. All left behind to be forgotten.
Kehtal’s gaze slipped over them, all of the pain and anger he had been feeling settling deep into some hidden part of him. There would be time enough for those emotions later. Now, there was a quiet that washed over him as if everything within the air was drawing tighter and tighter like a cord preparing to snap.
Just ahead was the gate. It was marked by its two large lanterns illuminating the landing area in front of it. He snapped his wings faster, driving him through the air with a speed that made the air whistle in his ears. Nothing mattered but that gate.
It grew rapidly at their approach, and he could feel the breath of freedom upon them. Just beyond those lanterns, Buosoa waited. She would guide them from there to the meeting place. Though his mouth was utterly dry, his throat worked in anticipation, excitement rising up from his core. They were nearly there!
A loud shriek split the air at a pitch that practically shook the air. Kehtal was forced to slow down as his flight pattern faltered with the vibrations rushing through the air as a shadow descended abruptly from above them. His eyes snapped toward it, his excitement curling inward and extinguishing as the large female struck for them, her violet scales flashing as her body moved sinuously through the air. Recognition stirred within him belatedly as he broke away to the side, narrowly avoiding being grasped by the female’s extended claws and tail.
Payeri!
He rolled through the air and straightened as Daskh’s broad wings covered him. The large male was assuming a guarding position over him. Kehtal shot his nest brother a grateful look before glancing around worriedly for their attacker. As viciously as she had launched herself at them, he was certain that she would not give up so easily.
Just below a shadow banked hard to the left and shot up toward them with another vicious shriek that broke rocks loose from the cavern wall above them, forcing them to dodge them. Feinting to the right and left as the boulders hurtled toward them, they narrowly avoided being knocked out of the air. He sent worried glances to the cavern beneath him, hoping that no one was harmed by the falling rocks. As much as he hated the noose the shinara kept around his neck as a male, he did not wish harm on the innocent females and males who dwelled there, unaware of what played out in the palace and currently in the air above them.
Rage filled Payeri’s face as she rushed up toward them, her dark wings expanding wider and around as she stretched them to their fullest to capture the most air and hurtled toward them. An answering snarl shot through the air above them as Kitanara folded her wings and dropped with lethal speed. They collided in violence, dropping from the air with angry shrieks. Kehtal watched them in horror, his eyes widening frantically, worried for the guard. Her claws ripped at her opponent; her sharp teeth bared as they grappled. Blood bloomed from both combatants, their tails whipping against each other as their wings alternately flapped and entangled.
A shriek of warning lifted through the air from her. “Go! Do not wait for me!”
Kehtal nodded but his wings nearly folded around him as he watched helplessly with concern. Could they really abandon her? Would Lori blame them if they did?
Daskh dropped from above him, his tail slashing the air, whipping at him as Hashal stared down at him silently with large, frightened eyes from the male’s grasp. “Move, Kehtal,” he snarled. “She is a captain of the shinara guard. She can hold her own. We need to go—now!”
A sick feeling filled his stomach as the females continued to slowly plummet through the air, but he sailed back toward the gate in determination, following Daskh’s lead as they sped toward it. Together, they breached the shinara, the light of the lanterns briefly bathing them and Buosoa as well as she rose rapidly to meet them.
Though her expression was strained, she did not look back at the combatants. Instead, they shot upward as one, their wings beating the air savagely as they rose up the channel leading to the upper caverns.
The crack that echoed from below them was a death cry in the silence, one that was followed by the muffled sound of a falling body hitting the ground. Buosoa’s wings trembled, her gavo twitching with her concern but she did not stop. None of them stopped. The caverns whisked by them in a seemingly endless procession before they were suddenly struck by searing heat and intense sunlight like he had never felt. Kehtal’s flight faltered but he stabilized himself at Daskh’s warning shriek breaking the air around him. Although the pain of the sun was excruciating, they could not stop yet... not yet.
Though it felt as if the sun was blistering the membrane of his wings, Kehtal flew without complaint over the sand, the mouth of the Aglatha shrinking rapidly in the distance. Despite the pain tormenting him, a weight lifted from within him.
Soon they would find what they could of their ashlava and give her the parting that she and their unborn nestlings deserved. He did not dare hope that Payeri had been wrong.
His eyes closed against the blade-like streams of sunlight, his hearts shattering within his chest as grief and hope struggled within him.
Let her be alive.