22. Gender reveal
TWENTY-TWO
GENDER REVEAL
SHARK
Things are working out exactly the way I predicted they would when I couldn’t get the engagement ring off her finger without waking her up.
Or cutting off her finger, which isn’t an option with Troy because I like her fingers and because the lack of a finger would make her not want to speak to me ever again. At least now I have a chance.
At least, I think I do.
I followed the women to the hospital only to find out Troy’s had a dark episode and ended up huddling in the corner of Tatiana’s office. Dr. Gruber, who knows me as Mike, is walking her in for an ultrasound.
“Mike,” Dr. Gruber greets me and extends a hand.
I shake it. “Fancy seeing you here.”
“I’m on vacation,” he says.
“How convenient for Troy to have you, then.”
“You know my patient?”
“Yes,” I say at the same time that Troy says “No.”
She turns toward Dr. Gruber and says, “I knew a few Mikes back in the States, but he isn’t one of them.”
She won’t give up my real name, but she’s mad and sad, and now I’m her number one enemy. This is what I get for not asking her to marry me last night. Instead, I was too busy sticking my dick in her and making her come on my face. Now I’m suffering the consequences of irrational horny behavior appropriate for teenagers, not men nearing forty.
I could’ve at least tried not having sex with her. I didn’t even try.
In addition, I was avoiding this very situation, where she barely wants to talk to me.
Dr. Gruber clearly senses that something is off between us, so before he starts prying, I say, “Thank you for walking her down for the ultrasound. I’ll take it from here.”
Without further ado, Dr. Gruber leaves, and Troy huffs out a breath.
“What are you doing here?” she asks.
“I’m here for the ultrasound.”
“You’re not invited.”
“But I’m staying anyway.”
“Fine.” She marches toward the exit. Alessio’s guarding it because I asked him to. When she spots him, Troy walks back in, then shoves a hand into my pocket. My dick jumps as if she said, Here, boy . She pulls out a lollipop, unwraps it, and shoves it into my mouth.
“You think you can use Alessio as your backup?” she asks, while I make a face at the taste of the lollipop. What is that flavor? Oh, hell no. I almost spit it out but have enough grace to take it out using my hand.
She snatches it from me and licks. “Ew.” She flicks it into the trash. “What was that?”
I shrug.
“Val!” she shouts.
“No. Don’t,” I tell her, wagging my index finger in warning.
“Valerina!” Troy shouts louder.
Behind me, the bathroom door opens, and Valerina comes out, a paper towel from drying her hands still between her palms. She narrows her eyes at me at the same time that Troy points to the exit. Valerina’s gaze follows and…Alessio’s nowhere to be seen.
“Shark was just leaving,” Troy says.
“I want to be here for the ultrasound, Troy.”
“You should’ve thought about that when you slid a ring onto my finger that I can’t take off.” She wiggles her fingers in my face.
Next to me, Valerina nods. “That’s right.”
“And now I’m going to see my baby.”
“It’s my baby too,” I tell her, leaving myself open to stabbing when she denies it.
I expect her to say that the baby isn’t mine, because she is allowed to say that, but Troy doesn’t. Instead, she says, “Yeah, but he’s inside my body, and you’re banned from my body.”
I look up at the ceiling and curse. No man wants a body ban. That’s a pussy ban, and that sounds like purgatory. “I’m sorry about the ring. I will make it up to you. Just let me see the baby.”
Troy bites her lip.
“Please,” I beg.
“Don’t forgive him,” Val says. “Not today.”
Troy turns toward her. “No?”
“Forgive,” I say. “Please. Come on, baby.”
“Not today,” Valerina says. “If you forgive him now, he’ll take you to the altar. Make him tell Alessio he can’t marry you today.”
“Valerina,” I say. “This is bad advice. Alessio is set on today.”
“But you’re not.” Troy shoves at my chest. Last night, when she shoved me, I let her because I was falling on the bed, but now I plant my feet on the floor and don’t move.
Troy shoves harder. Valerina starts to help her until the two of them push me out of the ultrasound room. I grab the doorjamb and hold on while Valerina shouts, “Alessio, I know you’re here because I can smell your cologne. Come get your man right now, or I swear to God, I’ll move to New York, where I’ll date the president of some biker gang you can’t take down.”
Footsteps herald Alessio’s arrival. He strides down the hallway, fixing his cuff links. When he reaches us, without saying a word, he leans against the wall, which basically means we’re capitulating. I let go of the doorjamb and step back before they slam the door on my fingers. The bang when they do shut the door is loud enough to ring in my ears.
“You’ve made yourself as useful as possible, I see,” I tell him sarcastically.
Alessio keeps fiddling with his cuff links. Once done, he knocks on the door. “Valerina.”
No answer.
He raps on it again.
“Interrupt me one more time,” Tatiana says from inside the room, “and I’ll start to think you’re eager for a rectal exam without lube.”
Alessio shakes his head. “Why is everyone so violent today?”
“Newsflash, tyrant. You’re the one who’s pushing for the wedding.” I lean my shoulder against the door. Voices drift from inside, and I press my ear to the wood, trying to listen. Alessio does the same.
Tatiana is explaining the procedure, talking about the coldness of the gel and the pressure on the bladder when she applies the instrument to the skin. Troy’s silence makes me think she’s nervous. I wish she’d let me in so I could reassure her that it’ll all work out.
Rapid thudding comes from inside the room.
“This is the baby’s heartbeat,” Tatiana says.
Alessio lifts a palm.
I smack it.
We have a heartbeat. Thank God. Not that I thought there wouldn’t be since the baby was kicking, but confirmation is great news.
Tatiana’s moving along with the ultrasounds, describing different parts of human anatomy and saying the organs and measurements are all normal and good. As she’s talking about the baby, my chest swells with a kind of joy I’ve never experienced. I had no idea a baby would make me this happy. Hell, I never even thought about babies.
For fuck’s sake, last week, I didn’t even have a relationship. I didn’t date. I’m shocked I’m enjoying this as much as I enjoy my job.
If Troy hadn’t come around, I’d have spent my life thinking that eliminating threats was the most fulfilling calling of my life. But I would have died totally unfulfilled.
“I feel very full,” I whisper to Alessio and tap my chest. “In here. I’m swollen like a balloon of joy.”
He puts a finger over his lips. “Be quiet or you’ll give away our position.”
I give him a thumbs-up.
“Do you want to know the sex of the baby?” Tatiana asks.
“Yes, I do,” Troy answers.
I wish I had giant elephant ears so I could plaster one to the door and hear better. But I don’t, so I suck in a breath and hold it, wishing my heart would beat quieter so I wouldn’t miss the moment Tatiana announces the sex of the baby.
“See this here?” Tatiana asks.
No.
“Yes, I see it,” Troy answers.
“What is it?” Valerina asks.
“This is the genital area, and it looks like it’s a girl,” Tatiana says.
A girl! I scream inside my head, then lift my hand for Alessio to slap my palm. When I can’t contain my excitement, I dance my way down the hall the way Freddie Mercury arrived on stage at 1985’s Live Aid.
I’m having a girl. Also, Troy owes me a hundred dollars.
Alessio’s waving his hand for me to return and listen.
With a big smile on my face, I return.
He’s listening intently. I frown at his expression. I think he’s confused.
I listen in.
“Do you see this?” Tatiana asks.
“Oh, I see it,” Valerina says. “That looks like this picture on your wall.”
“What picture?” I whisper to Alessio.
He’s frowning. I can’t read his expression. Is there something wrong? If Valerina knows “it,” whatever it is must be normal. Right? Right? Jesus, what is taking Tatiana so long to explain?
I hear sniffing. Who’s crying? Troy? Is she crying? There’s something wrong with the baby. Oh God, no. I swallow, stop breathing, and listen.
“This here tells us it’s a boy,” Tatiana says.
I gasp.
Alessio’s staring at me. I don’t know what my expression says, but Alessio comforts me by patting my shoulder. It’s okay , he mouths. Congratulations .
I don’t know what to make of what’s happening in there, and he’s congratulating me. I don’t…
“All very nice,” Tatiana says. “These are healthy measurements. We will move on to the next.”
“Next?” Alessio and I say in unison.
“Do you see this here?”
Troy’s sobbing at this point, and I can barely hear her yes.
“Another girl, so you see, everything is fine,” Valerina says. “Aww, Troy.”
Everyone is crying now.
Slowly, my enthusiasm deflates. Two girls and a boy means she’s having triplets, unless there’s something wrong with her single baby. Given Troy’s already difficult situation, no wonder she’s crying.
And I have nothing to offer her in terms of comfort except the fact I’ll bring everyone who’s ever even looked at her wrong before Jesus, who’s going to banish them straight to hell where Lucifer and I, when my day comes, will torture them for all of fucking eternity.
Amen.