9
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K O E N
A couple of days went by, and I was still trying to digest everything. Avril’s betrayal. The massacre of my pack. Learning that the myth of the Ashen Wolves was actually real, and that the mate I rejected was not only one of them, but also their leader. I was surrounded by creatures far stronger than me, though I couldn’t even comprehend the extent of their abilities just yet.
It was a lot. At times, I wanted to scream, but I knew losing it wouldn’t help. I was still mourning the loss of my family, wondering if I could have saved them. Nights were the worst, where my brain tortured me as I lay alone in a bed that wasn’t mine. Yet, what haunted me the most was trying to figure out where Avril and I stood.
We had agreed to start over, but neither of us had made a move yet. The idea was abstract enough on its own, and even more complicated in reality. Let’s begin again, I had said, but where exactly should we start? Col still longed for our mate, nurturing a bond that had only been broken on one side. My body craved her, making it hard to think rationally whenever she was near. However, the chaos of the moment combined with the still fresh ache of her recent abandonment left me hesitant.
Since Avril brought me here, she tried to stay around me as much as possible. I knew she had to be neglecting some of her responsibilities, and while I deeply appreciated it, it also made me feel guilty. When she was busy, she always designated Theo or Elijah to keep me company. In a new place where the residents didn’t seem especially fond of me, it was comforting to have a few familiar faces to both distract me from the darkness raging inside my head and help me adjust to their magical world.
My head was a mess. My heart was conflicted. But, all in all, I was grateful that I wasn’t completely alone.
“You know, it’s nice having a new face around, Koen,” Elijah casually said as we dined together.
All of our meals were held at the dining hall, where Avril always insisted I join her table - the table reserved for Elite members. Judging by the crooked looks I occasionally received from other pack members, it bothered them to have a new guy at the highest seat, but they respected their alpha far too much to disagree. If she ever caught their eye, they would immediately avert their gaze and lower their heads. It humbled and thrilled me, though it also sent a chill down my spine as I wondered just how powerful she might be to have them all tuck their tails with a single glance.
“It’s been a while since we’ve had new members,” the gamma continued.
“Two years,” Rhea pointed out without taking her eyes off her plate - a rare contribution to our conversation.
The delta wasn’t exactly rude, but she wasn’t welcoming either. She came across as indifferent and unusually quiet, barely speaking a word during our meals. Still, since Avril didn’t seem concerned by her behavior, I assumed this was just how she normally was.
“I miss fresh meat,” Theo added with a chuckle. “Watching them face the trials is always entertaining.”
The trials. The term echoed in my mind. It was the second time I’d heard it, and although it seemed like an important ritual for the Ashen Wolves, no one had bothered to explain it to me. Curiosity got the better of me, and I was about to ask when they changed the subject. To avoid disturbing the conversation, I decided to save my questions for later.
After dinner, Avril offered to walk with me, as she usually did. As much as I didn’t need to be escorted to my cottage, I always accepted her company, just to spend more time with her. While the rational part of me had its reservations about her, her presence still soothed my spirit, bringing me inexplicable peace.
Quiet reigned amidst our walk, but after enjoying it for a moment, I realized it was a good opportunity to quench my doubts from earlier, and I finally broke the silence.
“Hey, Avril,” I began, catching her attention. “What are the trials?”
She seemed slightly confused, as if she didn’t expect the question. “It’s kinda like a pack ritual,” she revealed, proceeding to explain, “All members of our pack are expected to take a test upon turning eighteen to prove they really have what it takes to be part of Azure Smoke. It’s mostly a formality.”
I nodded. “Did you go through the trials, too?”
“If they hadn’t deemed me capable of leading, they would never have accepted me as their alpha,” she clarified. “Since I didn’t grow up in Azure Smoke, I had a month to train before facing the trials. My uncle was my trainer, ensuring I was prepared. After succeeding, I also had to fight and defeat the strongest wolf in our pack to earn my role.” She paused, a half-smile lighting up her face as she added, “That was Theo.”
While her statement wasn’t surprising - considering that an alpha’s right hand is usually the second-strongest wolf in the pack - I chuckled in amusement. “How did he react to being defeated?”
“Oh, he was furious,” she laughed and I joined her. “But he got over it, and we eventually became friends. Despite his grumpiness, I recognized his potential, which is why I appointed him as my beta.”
As we approached my cottage, silence took over again as I thought about what she had said. An idea started brewing inside my head. I contemplated it for a few seconds before finally asking, “Can I take the trials?”
Avril came to an abrupt stop, her shock visible in her wide eyes. At first, she was quiet, studying me with her gaze, trying to read my mind. I couldn’t quite understand what was so absurd about my question.
Assuming she might be confused as to why I wanted to participate in her pack’s ritual, I explained, “I have no intention of becoming an official member of Azure Smoke, but I’d like to prove to your pack that I’m worthy of my temporary stay. Perhaps it’ll help them see me as more than an unwanted outsider.”
“Absolutely not!” she replied at last, and it was my turn to be confused. “I’m sorry, Koen, but that’s unfeasible.”
“Why?” I asked.
“Koen, the trials are meant for Ashen Wolves - not regular wolves,” she argued. “Even if you’re an alpha, without our special abilities, you would never succeed.”
“Well, let me try,” I insisted.
“No,” she replied, unwavering. “It’s dangerous. You could get hurt.”
“Then train me. Prepare me to face whatever challenges the trials have to throw at me,” I pleaded, staring straight into her eyes.
Avril pursed her lips, reluctant. I thought she would shut me down again, but as her gaze remained locked on mine, I noticed a subtle change in her features. Like she could see just how important this was for me. In the end, she sighed.
“Alright. I’ll let you train, and if I think you’re ready, I’ll let you take the trials,” she finally conceded.
“Good enough,” I replied, unable to hold a smile. “Thank you…” I made a brief pause, lowering my head playfully before concluding, “Alpha.”
Avril raised her eyebrows in surprise. From her reaction, I knew she was pleased with me addressing her by her title. For a moment, I could have sworn I’d seen her blush, but she quickly brushed it off, clearing her throat.
“Hey, Koen…” she called, sheepishly averting her gaze. “Are you tired yet?”
Intrigued, I answered, “Not really.”
A hint of excitement danced in her eyes as she revealed, “There’s a place I’d like to show you.”
With a tilt of her head, she gestured for me to follow. Curious, I obliged. As we moved farther away from the village, I noticed we seemed to be following the stream, the sound of water murmuring softly in the background. I stole glances at her as we ventured deeper into the woods, admiring how the moonlight framed her silhouette, casting an angelic glow around her.
Little by little, the sound of rushing water filled the silence, a gentle roar that beckoned us closer. As we stepped into a clearing, the moonlight revealed a waterfall cascading down the rocks, shimmering like liquid silver in the night. My breath caught in my throat at the breathtaking sight. All of her territory held an exotic beauty, but this looked like a piece of paradise hidden behind the trees.
“ Wow ,” was all I could say, taking a moment to soak it all in.
She chuckled, clearly amused. Then, her voice sounded, “You know the tall tree at Whispering Hills?” I nodded. “Well, this is my tree.” She opened her arms toward the waterfall. “Whenever I need to think, this is where I come. It makes me feel…free; unburdened.”
A familiar pang of longing hit me. This place held a sense of serenity that we both desperately needed. “It’s perfect,” I replied, my voice steadier than I felt.
As we stood together, the night air filled with the sound of the waterfall, I felt a surge of emotion. Everything we had been through - our past, our heartbreak - flooded back in a rush. I wanted to reach out, to bridge the distance between us, but I didn’t know how.
Avril seemed to share my feelings, hesitation mixed with temptation as she called, “Koen, I…”
But her voice trailed off. As if being closer to her would allow me to hear her thoughts, I took a step in her direction. Something shifted in the air between us. I saw her resolve, the way her breath hitched slightly. It was a moment of unguarded honesty, and I felt the pull of an unspoken invitation. Without thinking, I started closing the distance between us, and she met me halfway.
As if drawn by an invisible force, her hands found my face, and she leaned in, her lips brushing softly against mine. It was a gentle kiss at first, tentative yet electric, a spark igniting the tension that had built between us. I felt my heart soar as I kissed her back, the warmth of her lips igniting a flame within me.
The kiss deepened naturally, as if we were rediscovering something we had always known. I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her closer, surrendering to the moment. It felt like everything we hadn’t said was woven into that kiss, a bridge connecting our past with the promise of a new beginning.
We got lost in each other - in the moment. As our lungs began to scream for oxygen, we finally pulled apart. I rested my forehead against hers, both of us breathless, hearts beating fast, louder than the cascading waters. The silence held a weight of its own, heavy with everything we didn’t yet know how to say. But it didn’t matter. For once, I didn’t mind taking it slow. It was just what I needed - what we both needed.
The tension that had wrapped around us began to unravel, replaced by the thrill of possibility. In that moment, under the moonlight and the sound of the waterfall, I felt a glimmer of hope. Everything seemed uncertain now, but maybe, just maybe, we could reclaim what we had lost and forge a new path together.