18
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K O E N
“Alright, remember what we talked about yesterday!” Elijah encouraged me as I prepared to face Theo for the second time.
It was Day Two of training to prove I could beat the trials. My bruises had healed, and my resolve had only grown stronger. Determination fueled me as I readied myself for another round against Reagan.
After my conversation with Avril, she left to handle her duties with her team. I spent the rest of the day mostly at my cottage. In the evening, she stopped by and reluctantly shared that a few more pack members had gone feral on each other, only after I insisted she tell me how things were going.
With the lingering tension over the mysterious problem Azure Smoke was facing, I thought my training would have to be postponed so they could focus on the issue. However, when I spoke with my two coaches, they insisted it wasn’t a big deal and didn’t want it to disrupt their routines. To me, it sounded like they were simply refusing to give in to panic. Either way, I did as they said and showed up at the indoor training grounds at the same time as the day before.
Columbus and I were both more attentive today. It was a little easier to predict the beta’s moves, but before I could get comfortable, he started adapting, forcing me to do the same. He was going a bit harder than yesterday, using more of his powers to confuse and sneak up on me.
Whenever Reagan lifted his smoke cloak, I responded with my own makeshift dust veils. They weren’t as effective, nor lasted as long as his, but I could always conjure them again by kicking up dust. Theo noticed that, and found his own way to counter it, charging at Col to force him to dodge instead of allowing him to level the playing field freely.
The first fifteen minutes of training were a lot less frustrating. I’d even dare say Col and Reagan were dealing and absorbing equal amounts of damage. Yet, the second Theo deemed he was going too easy on me, he reminded me of his superiority, moving faster, attacking harder, using his natural camouflage to disorient me even more. At that point, it became difficult to keep up with him again.
Yet, just like on the day before, I stayed calm. I didn’t let the adrenaline take over. I kept my anger in check as I endured blow after blow, trying to keep a clear mind. Intelligence beats instinct, I reminded myself. And, much like I had done during our first session, I soon found an opportunity to get the upper hand.
Instead of avoiding the smoke clouds, which now covered most of the arena, I marched right into it. Making the most of my wolf’s heightened hearing and sensitivity, I was able to detect Reagan without having to see him, and Col delivered a precise blow, grabbing the beta by the neck and throwing him across the battlefield.
When the dark-coated beast landed, I could have sworn I’d heard him growl. I barely blinked, and he disappeared. Col stood still, staying calm, trying to identify where the opponent was hiding, and from which direction he would come.
This time, Reagan was so fast, Col almost didn’t have time to duck when he lunged at us. Another growl echoed through the enclosed space, and it sounded too menacing for a sparring match. Just as my wolf readied himself to bolt away in hopes of gaining enough distance to allow us to think about our next move, Reagan attacked us again. And again. And again.
The combat was getting more intense than I expected. Suddenly, I found it hard to ignore the pulsing adrenaline, the constant pain making my heart race. I tried to remind myself that this was just practice. I should stay calm - I wasn’t in real danger. But it sure seemed otherwise when Reagan’s sharp fangs missed Col’s jugular by an inch as he rushed past us in a blur.
That was when I realized that he had every intention to draw blood, and if my wolf hadn’t jumped back at the right time, he would have.
“Theo, stop! What are you doing?” Elijah’s worried voice reverberated through the walls, but the smoke was so thick I couldn’t even see him.
My pulse pounded. Whatever was going on, this wasn’t a simple sparring match anymore. Survival instinct kicked in, and I prepared to fight for my life without giving into despair - I knew if I lost my cool, I would become far more vulnerable.
Col perked his ears, attentive to his surroundings, yet refusing to back down. We had fought too many battles to succumb to fear. As Reagan became more vicious, he became even more menacing, but it was also easier to read him. My wolf managed to predict his next attack before he actually started moving, making it possible for us to dodge before he could get us.
But he was too close now. No rationality would help us overcome his unbeatable agility. I braced myself to take the next blow, the ravenous sounds of Reagan’s snarls echoing in my ears.
Yet, before he could reach Col, someone equally fast jumped between us.
“Reagan, it’s me! Your mate! Stop!” Elijah yelled desperately, arms open as he stood in front of my wolf.
The dark gray wolf appeared from the shadow, eyes glowing like a predator’s, fangs bared. The second his attention fell on his mate, he stopped. Seeing Elijah seemed to snap him out of whatever trance he was in.
Gradually, the smoke faded. When I could see clearly again, I realized the beta was back to his human form. Theo was on his knees, hands shaking as he looked at them, eyes wide with horror.
“What…what happened?” he whispered in shock. Then, his gaze shifted to Col, and it seemed to click in. Remorse washed over his face. “Koen, I’m sorry. I don’t know what got into me. I just…Reagan got so angry…”
“Hey, it’s okay,” Elijah told him tenderly, crouching by his side and cradling his face. Theo kept rambling while his mate rubbed his arm soothingly.
Regardless of how calm he tried to appear to his mate, the look he flashed at me, holding a confused and regretful Theo in his arms, told a different story. He knew what had happened, and it soon dawned on me, too.
The beta had just fallen victim to the inexplicable anger outbursts some of the Ashen Wolves were experiencing.
A V R I L
Three days had passed since the episode with Oliver. By now, a total of twelve pack members, out of our twenty-nine, had lost control and lashed out at others, including my beta. We instructed them to stay home, accompanied by a close friend or family member carrying a silver injection, just to be safe.
Meanwhile, I was going out of my mind trying to understand what was going on.
With almost half our pack under some form of quarantine, our sanctuary looked like a ghost town. Tension lingered in the air, thickened by the eerie mystery no one could quite figure out. It broke my heart. I had vowed to bring them freedom, yet they were now more confined than ever, prisoners of their fear of losing control.
Rumors spread quickly. I could hear whispers of terror as the shifters speculated that these strange anger outbursts might be some kind of curse unleashed upon the Ashen Wolves. Some even suggested it was punishment for bringing in an outsider, as our sanctuary wasn’t meant for regular wolves.
I was mostly skeptical. I wasn’t one to believe in curses, especially not after the Moon Goddess gave us her blessing and restored our powers. However, in the back of my mind, I caught myself wondering if they could be right - if there really was a chance Koen’s presence could be the problem.
Despite my stress and restlessness, I tried to maintain a calm demeanor. If I gave in to panic, all of Azure Smoke would follow. I did my best to keep the pack together, telling everyone to go about their routines as if nothing was wrong. Koen was training with Elijah while I spent most of my days in the pack’s library, researching the history of the Ashen Wolves. I looked for any signs that a similar event had happened in the past, but all my efforts came up empty, and I remained in the dark.
After finishing the last book I could read, I slammed it shut with more force than necessary, the sharp crack of the spine echoing through the quiet library. Another dead end. The mystery remained as elusive as ever, mocking my desperate search for answers. How could I lead my family through this when I had nothing to go on?
I rubbed my temples, trying to push down the headache threatening to bloom behind my eyes. The flickering light of the late afternoon sun streamed through the high windows, casting long shadows across the shelves. It felt suffocating, this silence, this waiting. The hollow in my chest grew with each passing day, each shifter lost to the strange outbursts. I was supposed to protect them.
And I was failing.
As if on cue, I heard the door open. At first, I stiffened. I couldn’t let any pack member find me like this - stressed, desperate, hopeless. But it was only an instant before the familiar scent filled the expansive room, and I realized it wasn’t an Ashen Wolf.
“Avril,” Koen called out, his voice serene. Sadly, it wasn’t enough to calm my nerves down. “Do you need company?”
I took in a few breaths before replying, “No, it’s fine.”
“You’ve been here all day,” he pointed out, a hint of pity in his voice. With my back to him, I heard his footsteps as he approached me.
“I know. I’ll be heading out soon,” I told him, hoping he would go away.
I didn’t want him to worry. I didn’t want him to pity me. It made me feel weak. Incapable.
Yet, he kept walking forward, closing the distance between us. “You don’t have to do this alone, Avril.”
His statement triggered all of the heavy emotions to fall at once, and as I was overcome with them, irritation shone through my tone. “Why? You think I can’t handle this on my own?” I shot back.
At last, he halted. “That’s not-”
“I used to do just fine before you came along, Koen,” I observed, finally rising from my seat, snapping my head toward him. “Why did you have to get involved?”
He furrowed his brow in confusion, and it was my turn to approach him. “You were the one who rejected me. You crawled your way back into my life, when you had no right to change your mind. And now, everything is falling apart!”
“Wait, so this is my fault?” he asked, trying to act innocent. As if he hadn’t been the one to break down my walls. To sweep me off my feet. To turn my world upside down, when I had everything under control.
“Yes, it’s your fault!” I shouted, my voice rising, chest heaving. The room felt too small, like the walls were closing in on me. My skin tingled with a strange heat, my hands shaking. "You ruined everything! Because of you, I might just lose the only thing that was always truly mine! I put you above my pack - just once, I put someone else first - and now I might lose them all because of you!"
“Avril…” Koen’s voice was quiet, almost a whisper. “Kea,” he called out to my wolf, who had been going wild inside my head, and she suddenly calmed down.
I didn’t realize I was growling until I caught the glint of panic in his eyes, and it made my stomach lurch. He wasn’t fighting back. He was only wary. Of me.
And then it hit me, cold and brutal - I was losing it too.
The same thing that had taken half my pack had its claws in me now. As the realization sunk in, I stumbled backward, horror flooding through me as my heart thundered in my chest. I sank into the chair behind me, my hands trembling as I gripped the edges of the seat, forcing myself to breathe. Koen didn’t say a word, but the silence that stretched between us was deafening.
"I… I’m sorry," I whispered, the words barely audible.
But the damage had already been done.