15. Emily
15
EMILY
It will actually be a miracle if I don’t flunk that economics exam.
I could barely focus, because of the whole Danil situation. I half expected him to try and call me last night, but my phone was deathly silent, and that only made me madder.
How the hell did this happen?
One minute, he was kissing me like he wanted to take me to bed and the next minute I find out he’s been lying to me.
To say I’m confused is an understatement.
We were supposed to be friends. I consider Danil my best friend. At least, I used to, so the fact he never once considered telling me the truth hurts like hell.
But more than that, I’m embarrassed and not just because of the kiss. I hate the fact that he knows the truth about my working as a hostess, and that makes me feel sick to my stomach.
I can’t stop wondering if that was why he kissed me.
Does he think I’m some kind of easy fuck? I know the girls who work these parties tend to have a bit of a reputation, but my reason for working there was purely monetary. Surely, Danil would realize that?
Maybe he doesn’t. Maybe we don’t know each other as well as I thought.
Or maybe he pities me.
I honestly don’t know what to think anymore.
But what I do know for sure is that I want Danil to stay the fuck out of my way.
After my exam finishes, I quickly pack up my things and rush out the door of the classroom before I get stuck in the bottleneck of students trying to leave.
From the looks on the rest of my classmates’ faces, it’s clear I’m not the only one who thinks they’ve flunked that exam.
I just have to hope that I do well enough in the rest of my exams that it doesn’t affect my overall grade too much. I really don’t want to have to repeat my Junior year because of Danil.
When I finally get outside, I find a blacked-out Range Rover parked practically on the sidewalk across from the business building. The lights start flashing and out climbs Alek, my new driver.
It seems that only hulking great beasts work for my brother-in-law because Alek is enormous and looks like he could snap every bone in my body without breaking a sweat.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s nice to know that he’s got my back. I just wish he could be a bit more… inconspicuous.
I can feel dozens of eyes on me as I approach the car, and my cheeks burn up as Alek scowls at every person within a hundred-yard radius of me. My face gets even hotter when Alek opens up my door for me, like I’m some kind of celebrity.
I’m completely mortified.
“Hi, Alek.” I quickly climb in the back seat.
He dips his chin at me before shutting the door.
I’m thankful the windows are tinted, so I don’t have to lock eyes with any of the people currently staring at me.
Including Danil.
“Where to, Ms. Mullens?”
“Crostini’s, please, Alek.” I try to ignore the growing pit in my stomach as I tear my eyes away from Danil.
To distract myself from my spiraling thoughts, I pull out my phone and send Jana a quick text, letting her know I’m on my way to the restaurant.
She sends a string of emojis in response, and my shoulders start to relax.
I’m glad she suggested having dinner together. It will be a pleasant distraction from this mess with Danil.
Just as I’m replying to Jana, I receive a message from Zara.
Can we talk?
I click on the message, and a lump forms in my throat.
I’ve somehow managed to avoid my sister, though I’m under no illusion that Dimitri filled her in on what happened last night.
Thankfully, she was spending the night at Bianca’s and had taken the twins with her, and I had already left for school by the time she got back, so I could put off having this very conversation.
I know I can’t avoid her forever either, but knowing Zara, she’ll want to agonize over every little detail about my fight with Danil, and that’s the last thing I want to do. Right now, I just want to drink cheap wine and eat a crap load of pasta and not think about him for the next few hours.
Me
I’m having dinner with Jana. Don’t wait up. Talk tomorrow. x
I shut my phone off before Zara has a chance to reply.
Alek pulls up outside Crostini’s ten minutes later, and before I can even unbuckle my seatbelt, he appears at my door and helps me out of the car.
“Thanks.”
The man might be a literal mountain, but he’s also very attractive, though not in the same way that Danil is. He doesn’t have the chiseled features or the clean-cut look that reduces me to an Emily-shaped puddle on the floor.
“Ms. Mullens?”
“Huh?”
“Is everything all right?”
“That is yet to be determined, Alek. Thank you for driving me.”
Alek says nothing, but he also makes no move to get back in the car, which means we’re both just standing on the sidewalk looking like the most awkward couple ever.
I’ve never had a bodyguard before, so I’m not sure of the protocol. But I feel weird making him wait in the car while I stuff my face with pasta and wine. “Do you…want to come too?”
Alek frowns at me. “I’ll be outside.”
I take that as my cue to head inside.
The restaurant is heaving, so I scan the tables, trying to find Jana.
I eventually spot her at a small table for two at the back of the restaurant, but she’s not looking at me. She’s glancing nervously to her left, and I follow her gaze.
“Oh, you have got to be kidding me.”
Sitting at the neighboring table, Danil has his eyes locked on mine, but he doesn’t smile.
Crostini’s is a fairly small place, so the tables are quite cramped together, which means I’m about to embark on the most awkward dinner of my life.
I purposefully ignore Danil as I weave my way through the tables to get to Jana. I waste no time slipping into my seat and picking up my menu, trying to hide the fact that my cheeks are a raging inferno.
“Oh, no, you don’t.” Jana snatches my menu out of my hands and tosses it down on the table.
“I need to see the menu, Jana.”
“You’ll have the mushroom tagliatelle like you always do.”
Sometimes, I wish I wasn’t so damn predictable.
“Can we at least order drinks before we get to the interrogation?”
“Already took care of it. Didn’t want to risk your fake ID not working, and from the look on your face and the fact that Danil is sitting less than four feet away and not talking to you makes me think that we’re going to need some alcohol.”
When I say nothing, Jana narrows her eyes at me.
“Okay, what the heck is going on?”
“It’s a long story…”
“I gathered as much.”
I can feel Danil’s eyes on me, but I refuse to look at him. I don’t want to give him the satisfaction of even acknowledging his presence.
The fact that he’s still following me despite how I reacted yesterday pisses me off even more. How much clearer could I have been?
Thankfully, our waiter arrives with our wine and the moment he’s finished pouring me a glass, I practically snatch it out of his hand and down half of it in one gulp.
“She’s had a rough day.” Jana smiles at the waiter, who’s looking at me with a very concerned expression.
I set my glass down on the table. “Keep it coming.”
When Jana and I are once again alone, I decide to get back at Danil for lying to me.
Seeing as he’s sitting close enough to overhear our conversation, I figure I might as well use that to my advantage.
“Danil’s been stalking me.”
“Excuse me?” Jana’s eyes look like they’re about to bug out of her head.
“You know that guy who’s been stalking me?”
“Fuck, that’s not Danil, is it?”
“No, but he says that’s why he’s been following me around. To make sure I’m safe.”
Jana frowns, and I don’t miss the way her eyes quickly flick to Danil.
I keep my attention on my half-empty glass of wine, not wanting to see the look on his face. Or rather, see his face at all.
The way he looked at me like I was a stranger when I walked into the restaurant had a lump forming in my throat. It’s so far from how I thought he would act, considering the fact that he knows what he did is wrong. So, why isn’t he begging for my forgiveness?
I know I wasn’t exactly completely honest with him either, but that’s different. It was me keeping something secret that only concerned me. Not him.
But he lied to me about something that concerned me, too.
Maybe Danil cares less about our friendship than I thought, and I was too blinded by the idea of him that I failed to notice.
Jana shakes her head. “So, he’s been watching you? I’m not sure if that’s creepy or hot.”
Both?
I take another gulp of wine.
“Oh, my god, you think it’s hot.” Jana laughs.
“Shh!”
My face might actually catch on fire.
The last thing I need is for Danil secretly following me to turn into some kind of stalker kink.
“So, what now? You’re pretending to be pissed at him or something? Is that part of the game?”
“This isn’t a game, Jana.”
“Uh, yeah, okay… So, you’re telling me that you’re not ignoring each other because something happened between you two, and you’re refusing to talk about it?”
“I just told you why we’re not talking.” I fold my arms across my chest.
“You told me why you think you’re not talking.”
“Have you ever considered changing your major to law? Because you’ve got a real knack for twisting my words.”
“Oh, come on , Em, lighten up! This is Danil we’re talking about here. You’ve had a crush on him for as long as I’ve known you.”
The only saving grace is that her words come out as barely above a breath.
“Don’t remind me.”
“You’re seriously telling me that in all the time he’s been following you, and making sure you’re safe, I might add, nothing has happened?”
I sigh. “Fine. We kissed.”
“Seriously? When?” Jana looks genuinely shocked, and I’m not sure whether to be offended or not.
“The other night…”
“Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”
“Because I was embarrassed.”
“Why? Was he bad?” She slyly glances in Danil’s direction.
“Far from it.”
“Then what’s the problem?”
“It’s what happened after. Dimitri was about to interrupt us, and Danil practically bolted away from me, like he was embarrassed to be seen kissing me or something.”
“Emily, you know that makes no sense, right?”
“It makes perfect sense.”
Jana looks at me like I’ve just grown two heads. “Dimitri asked him to keep an eye on you, not stick his tongue down your throat.”
“Yeah, so?”
“ So , what would kissing you accomplish? It certainly wouldn’t get him any extra points with Dimitri, which means he did it because he wanted to.”
I hate that Jana always seems to make such good points.
“Who instigated the kiss, anyway?”
My mind floods with the image of Danil before he kissed me. The way his dark eyes heated as I teased him.
“I’m not sure.” If I had kept my mouth shut, would he have still kissed me?
The question has been plaguing my thoughts ever since it happened.
“But if I did, then he might only have kissed me back so I wouldn’t feel rejected.”
Jana uncrosses her arms and leans forward to reach for my hand.
“Seriously, Emily, you need to stop torturing yourself.”
“That’s easier said than done.” I glance over at Danil.
Everything would be so much easier if only I knew what he was really feeling.