Skies Over Caledonia: A Small Town Marriage of Convenience Romance (The Highlands Series Book 4)

Chapter 20

Icouldn’t remember the last time I’d had balls this blue.

When Allegra proposed we refrain from seeing other people for the first two months of our marriage, I didn’t think anything of it. Contrary to popular belief, I had gone more than a week without sex. After my grandfather died, in fact, I’d gone six months without sex because I couldn’t bear to be close to anyone, even in just a physical capacity. The only person I hadn’t put my guard up with was Sarah because she was the only other person who was in as much pain as I was.

So I could go without sex.

The problem was that I’d promised to go without sex while married to and living with the sexiest fucking woman in existence.

Everything Allegra did turned me on.

One night, she brought all this girly shit downstairs so she could paint her nails while we watched a movie. When she’d stretched out a leg and bent over to paint her toenails, it might as well have been a striptease for how my body reacted.

I’d imagined knocking the nail crap out of the way, taking her gorgeous legs in hand, and hooking them over my shoulders so I could go down on her. Thankfully, she was preoccupied with her nails so she barely noticed me excusing myself to go stand in the open door of the goddamn freezer.

Last night, playing her husband was easy and difficult at the same time. I’d never wanted to be anyone’s husband, but I couldn’t deny the possessiveness I felt around Allegra. How much I’d wanted to knock that rich arsehole through the wall when I’d spotted him across the room reaching out to tuck a strand of my wife’s hair behind her ear.

How many times had I wanted to do the same thing? To follow the move by trailing my fingers down her silky throat, to feel her pulse beneath my touch, to feel it race as I moved lower.

Being allowed to put my hands on her, in fact being “forced” to for the sake of our ruse, had stretched my willpower to its breaking point. If I didn’t rein in this bloody need for Allegra, I was going to do something we’d inevitably regret. Even if it felt fucking amazing in the moment.

Weirdly, I didn’t want our deal to end badly. When this was all over, I still wanted to be in Allegra’s life. I still wanted to be her friend. I needed her to know that she had one person in her life who knew her truth and saw her for who she really was: a good person who would do anything to protect those she loved. Selfishly, I wanted her to remain my friend too. To have someone other than Sarah who knew my worst secrets and still saw good in me.

I smiled to myself as I watched her baby-talking to one of the hens she’d called Ginger after a character in the movie Chicken Run. She’d turned the chickens into pets. Ginger, to be fair, had taken a shine to Allegra. She ran like an excited kid toward her anytime Allegra was in the vicinity of the pen. My wife had announced after only one day of taking care of the chickens that she would never eat chicken again. We hadn’t since.

Something the hen did made Allegra tip her head back in laughter, and my traitorous eyes shifted down her gorgeous body. Hunger like I’d never experienced in my life tightened deep in my gut and in my balls.

Fuck.

If I didn’t get out of here now, I might just give into temptation.

I pushed open the kitchen window and called, “I’m heading out. I’ll catch you later!”

Allegra turned toward me, eyes wide, lips parted as if to say something, but I turned on my heel and hurried through the farmhouse before she could come after me.

“Fucking coward,” I muttered to myself as I drove the Defender away from the house.

“I was just about to call you,” Georgie said, striding toward my vehicle as I pulled up at the field called North Creich.

His grim countenance had me jumping out of the Defender. “What happened?”

Georgie shook his head, a muscle ticking in his jaw. “Someone killed a ewe.”

My chin jerked back in surprise. “Someone? What the hell do you mean?” I gestured for him to show me.

His voice was a wee bit shaky as he opened the gate. “I mean her fucking throat has been slashed.”

Rage and confusion flooded me as I followed him up the field. The sheep were gathered all together on the hillside while Georgie led me away from them. If Georgie hadn’t alerted me to a problem, the loud bleating from the sheep would have given it away. They were scared. “I don’t understand.”

Georgie led me right over to the fence that ran through North Creich and Little Ardshave. There was a dip in the land just before the fence and as we grew closer, I saw the body of the animal partially hidden because of it.

“Fuck,” I muttered, approaching the ewe slowly. Rounding her, I crouched to examine her neck and to my horror saw Georgie was correct.

This was no injury or attack from another member of the flock. The cut across her throat was too precise. A wound on her abdomen suggested she’d been stabbed there first to subdue her.

Sorrow stung my eyes.

“What kind of sick fuck does this to an animal?” I seethed hoarsely.

“I don’t know.” Georgie was visibly distressed too. “We need to call the police, though, Jar.”

Knowing he was right, I waited as Georgie called. He strode off to meet them at the gate, while I went over to make sure the rest of our flock was okay. They were nervous and frightened, and a male ran at me in warning to back off, protecting the rest of the sheep.

I called Anna to let her know what had happened and asked if she could come to move them out of the field. Considering the circumstances, she agreed to as soon as possible.

As for me, I returned to stand guard over the felled ewe, my mind racing with the possibilities. Because this was a deliberate, vindictive assault on an animal. On one of my animals.

My thoughts kept returning to one person.

Dear old Dad.

I said as much to the police when they arrived and explained my father’s threats. I even forwarded on his text messages to the constables. Anna arrived to take care of the flock while Georgie and I loaded up the ewe so he could take her to the abattoir.

And all I wanted, after running away from her this morning, was to see Allegra’s face. To take comfort in her presence.

So I followed that instinct and returned to the house, grateful to find her car still parked in the driveway. We’d gone car shopping a few weeks back and I was pleasantly surprised by her taste in vehicles. She’d ended up purchasing a Wrangler. Though she’d gone for a flashy bright yellow that made me chuckle every time I saw it.

Except for today.

I was in no mood for laughs today.

Allegra wasn’t inside the house. I quickly washed up, changed my clothes, and then headed outside. I found my wife in the back garden. She’d dragged two kitchen chairs out, one to sit on and one for her legs. Her knees were bent as she sketched on a pad that rested on her thighs. A frown of concentration marred her brow, and as I grew closer, I realized she was sketching the farm. It wasn’t the type of work I was used to seeing from her.

“It looks good,” I murmured.

She jumped, startled, those big eyes wide with surprise. “What are you doing back so soon?”

Whatever she saw on my face caused her to take her feet off the other chair and offer it to me. I sat, our knees brushing we were so close. Then I told her about the ewe.

Hanging my head as worries coursed through me, I sighed at the feel of her fingers stroking over my head. I knew I shouldn’t, but I leaned into her touch.

“I’m so sorry, Jared. I’m so sorry.” Her fingernails lightly scratched over my nape and I reached for her, my hands light on the outside of her thighs as she continued to caress me. Soothe me.

Fucking comfort me.

It felt better than it should.

“I’m going to kill whoever did this,” she vowed vehemently. “And we’ll figure out together who was behind it. I promise.”

Unbelievably, a smile tugged at my mouth. I lifted my head to look at her and the urge to kiss her was so bloody overwhelming, I knew my control had slipped. I felt myself moving toward her?—

My ringtone screamed from my arse pocket. It was like a lasso around my torso, yanking me back from Allegra and into reality. Shit. I’d almost kissed her.

“Sorry. Might be the police.” I stood abruptly to pull out my phone. Sorcha’s name and photo was on the screen. Beneath it were several texts from her I hadn’t opened.

Not really in the mood to talk to anyone but seeing it as an opportunity to avoid fucking things up with Allegra, I answered.

“Oh my God, Jared, thank God,” Sorcha’s frantic voice cut down the line.

My first thought was that something had happened to Brechin again. “Everything all right?”

“No, no. I’ve just gotten back from a hair appointment and my door was ajar. The wood is splintered and Brechin won’t stop barking. I’m afraid to go inside. I think someone broke in.”

What the … could this day get any worse? “Did you call the police?”

“Aye, they’re on their way. I just … I’m scared. Would you come? Please.”

“Sorcha, it’ll take me an hour to get there …” I sensed Allegra standing behind me.

“Please, Jared. Please.” I heard sniffling and stiffened. I’d never heard Sorcha cry.

“Okay. I’ll be there. But wait outside. Do not go in until the police get there.”

What a bloody day. After I hung up, I turned to Allegra with an exasperated sigh. “Did you hear that?”

Her expression was unreadable. “Something wrong with Sorcha?”

“She thinks someone broke in. The police are on their way, but she’s shaken up. I’m going to check it out.”

She nibbled on her bottom lip and then gestured to my phone. “Doesn’t she have anyone else she can call? I mean, you’re having an awful day yourself, Jared.”

“I’ll be quick.” I patted my pocket for my keys and realized I’d left them in the kitchen.

“Why—” Allegra slammed her mouth shut and sat down on the chair.

“Why what?”

“Why are you the person she called?”

She wouldn’t meet my eyes as I stared down at her. I wondered if she was put out about this. “We’re friends.”

“Oh.”

“Just friends,” I offered. “I’ll be back soon.”

“Okay.” She wouldn’t look at me. Instead, she picked up her sketch pad and proceeded to ignore me.

Unease churned in my gut.

Fuck.

This was all I needed.

Sorcha’s place was wrecked. Whoever had broken in had locked Brechin in the bathroom (thankfully hadn’t harmed the wee man), and not only stolen anything of any value but the arseholes had trashed the place. The police had already been and gone by the time I arrived, and I found Sorcha crying on her sofa surrounded by the mess.

“I’m sorry, Sorch.” I sat down beside her, clapping an upset Brechin with one hand and putting my other arm around Sorcha. “It’s going to be okay.”

“Is it?” Sorcha wiped at her nose as she looked at me. Her pupils were huge with shock. “Jared, I live alone. On a teacher’s salary. I can’t afford this emotionally or financially.”

“You have insurance, though, right?”

Her jaw slackened. “Insurance?”

“Insurance.” I rubbed soothing circles on her back.

Some of her tension eased. “Jared, insurance. Of course, I have insurance. I completely forgot about that. Oh, that’s something.” She leaned into me, resting her head on my shoulder. “I’m going to be too scared to go to sleep tonight.”

“Is someone coming to fix the door?” The doorjamb had been busted open.

“Later this afternoon.” She lifted her head, expression pleading. “But maybe you could stay tonight.”

I stiffened. “You know that can’t happen. Why don’t you stay with Donna?” I referred to one of her closest friends.

Hurt flashed across her face. “I keep forgetting you’re married. I just … I miss you.”

Discomfort shifted through me as I removed my hand from her back and stood.

Sorcha grimaced at the sudden physical distance. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to be weird and awkward. It’s just this …” She gestured to the flat. “Most of the time I’m pretty happy on my own. Truly. But then something like this happens, and it makes me feel lonely.”

Shit. Compassion filled me, but I forced myself not to embrace her. I didn’t want to give her the wrong idea. “I get it. I’m sorry.”

She studied me thoughtfully. “Do you really love her, then?”

I lowered my gaze, staring at Brechin who was giving me the same big puppy dog eyes as his owner. “Sorcha …”

“I’m happy for you. She must be really understanding, letting you come out here to help. Letting you talk to me.”

“Letting me?” I frowned. “You and I are just friends now. Allegra knows that.”

Sorcha scoffed. “Jared, we’re friends who used to fuck. If your wife says she’s okay with our friendship, she’s absolutely lying.”

“No. Allegra’s not like that.” Especially because our marriage wasn’t real.

“Oh. So if you found out she was still talking every week to a guy she used to fuck on the regular, you’d be fine with that?”

The thought of Allegra with any man filled me with a fury I didn’t want to examine too closely.

“I’ll take that murderous expression as a no.” Sorcha chuckled humorlessly and stood. “I’m sorry for dragging you down here, Jar. I’m sorry for holding out hope that your marriage would fall apart, and you and I could go back to what we had.”

My eyebrows rose in surprise at that confession.

“It’s clear that you and she are solid, and I shouldn’t be calling a married man to come and bloody rescue me.” Sorcha scrubbed a hand down her face. “I’m so sorry.”

“Sorch, it’s fine.”

“It’s not.” Her expression was apologetic. “Go home to your wife, Jared. I’ll call Donna.”

I shifted uneasily. “I can wait for her to arrive.”

“No.” She gave me a sad smile. “You’re not mine to rely on. You never really were, were you?”

Guilt shafted through me. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. We can’t help who we love.”

I felt heavy with the exchange after I said goodbye to her and Brechin and got back in my car. Instead of leaving immediately, I decided I’d wait until I saw Donna pull up in her Toyota. When I searched for my phone to text Allegra I’d be back soon, I discovered I’d left the bloody thing on the kitchen table when I’d snatched up my car keys.

While I was sure Sorcha was wrong about Allegra, considering our marriage was fake, I couldn’t help but think how my wife wouldn’t meet my eyes before I left. Just seconds before that, she’d been touching me, offering me solace and fierce loyalty. The combination was a massive turn-on. But she’d switched it off, turned from me at the mention of Sorcha.

Fuck.

Maybe Sorch was right.

I was relieved on multiple levels when Donna showed up. Relieved for Sorcha that she had company and relieved that I could get back to Allegra before any of this looked suspicious. Not that I technically owed her anything. But I did. I’d promised her fidelity for two months.

I needed her to trust that I’d keep my word.

I just needed her to trust me.