Chapter 27
After years of living in Ardnoch, I was used to the vast differences of life in the village depending on the season. While tourists visited all year round, they were fewer during the winter months. Tables in the cafés and pub opened up, and Castle Street was quieter in the evenings.
However, in the height of summer, I still couldn’t get parked on the main thoroughfare at seven thirty p.m. My visits to the Gloaming had been rare since marriage, and I glanced into the mottled front window to find it packed inside. Georgie might even be in there with a few locals we used to share a weekly pint with. To my surprise, I didn’t feel the urge to go in and be with my mates.
Instead, I carried on my way, turning down the cobbled lane between the jail museum and the Chinese restaurant. Once the nights got darker, the lane would be lit by the Victorian-style lampposts, but this evening they weren’t as the sun still hadn’t set. My destination was William’s Wine Cellar. It sold a wide selection of alcohol, and as Allegra had just told me, a fairly good selection of nonalcoholic wine. She liked a particular brand that William’s sold. She’d mentioned offhand she fancied a glass, and I didn’t mind a quick trip to the village to retrieve it.
Now that the security system was installed, I felt safer about leaving Allegra alone in the house.
Pushing the glass doors open, I came to an abrupt halt at the sight of Aria standing at the counter, chatting to William. I hadn’t been alone with Allegra’s sister … well … ever.
She glanced at me, her eyebrows rising. “Jared.”
“All right?” I approached her reluctantly.
“Yeah.” She gestured to the two bottles on the counter. “Just grabbing some wine.” Pain I didn’t understand flashed across her face. “’Cause I can drink it.”
“Okay.” Looking to William, I nodded in greeting. “You got any Binnie’s NA red?”
William pushed away from the counter. “How many bottles?”
“Eh, make it two.”
“So, Ally sent you on an NA run, huh?” Aria gave me a small smile, even as she searched my face. I didn’t know what she was looking for, but I felt under inspection. Since I’d married my wife, I’d only seen Aria twice, and yet each time it was clear I was being judged. And I didn’t like it.
“I offered.”
Awkward silence fell between us as I pretended to study the whisky bottles behind William’s counter.
“So … how are you both?”
“Good.”
“How is Ally really doing? You know, after the chickens? She was pretty upset.”
“She’s getting there. Even talking about getting more chickens.”
“Oh, that’s good. How are you?”
I frowned and repeated, “Good.”
Aria snorted. “You’re not big on the talking, huh?”
I shrugged, not sure what she wanted me to say.
She leaned in. “I just want Ally to be happy. To settle down. To stop … to stop doing impulsive stuff.”
“Impulsive stuff?” I bit out.
“Look, you don’t know Allegra’s history. But this is not the first time she’s done something insane and paid for it. I don’t want her getting hurt again.” Concern etched Aria’s features. “I’m worried that she’s just built to self-destruct. I don’t want that to be true … so I really hope that whatever is going on between you works out. For both of you.”
Agitation thrummed through me. It was seriously difficult to keep my tongue in check. Because Allegra was right. As much as her sister might love her, she didn’t know her. Aye, she didn’t know the real reason Allegra went off the rails in high school, but it was clear she’d started to believe Allegra was just a fuck-up.
And fuck that.
I scoffed. “You don’t need to worry about Allegra self-destructing. The mere fact that you are tells me that in less than two months, I know and understand Allegra more than you ever tried to in twenty-five years.”
Aria’s jaw dropped just as William returned to the counter.
“How much?” I asked abruptly.
William frowned at my tone and told me.
I swiped my card over the payment terminal, feeling Aria’s eyes on me but refusing to look at her. Thanking William gruffly, I grabbed the bag with the bottles of NA and strode out of the shop.
A few seconds passed and I heard her heels on the cobbles behind me. “Jared, wait!”
Anger still thrummed hotly in my blood, but I stopped. Aria rounded me. The woman was taller than me in her sky-high shoes. Indignation snapped in her green eyes. I’d always found her a bit too cold and aloof for my tastes, but right then, she was as fiery as her sister as she growled, “What the hell does that mean?”
I shrugged. “Just what I said.”
“No one knows Ally better than me.”
I gave a bark of incredulous laughter and I moved to pass her. “You know fuck all about Allegra.”
Aria gripped my biceps. “What don’t I know?”
Shrugging out of her hold, I gave her a hard look. “Everything.”
I’d barely given her my back when she pleaded in a broken voice, “Jared, please.”
Instant remorse cut through me when I glanced back and saw the tears she struggled to hold in.
Damn it. I’d never seen Aria Hunter anything but composed, cool, and intimidatingly assertive. Seeing her vulnerable made me feel like an arse.
Cursing under my breath, I faced her. “I can’t tell you about Allegra’s past. It’s up to her who she shares it with.”
“She shared it with you, though?” Hurt glimmered in her eyes.
I nodded, my voice a wee bit softer as I replied, “Aye, she’s told me everything.”
Aria’s face crumpled and the tears slipped free.
“Fuck.” I moved toward her helplessly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you. I just … it makes me angry that you all think Allegra’s a fuck-up when she’s anything but.”
“I don’t think she’s a fuck-up.”
At least that’s what I think Aria replied. It was hard to tell because it was garbled by her cries.
Awkward and guilty and utterly powerless before a woman’s tears, I lowered the bag of NA wine to the cobbles and put my arms around her. “Hey, it’s okay.”
To my shock, Aria returned the embrace, her own bag of wine knocking against my back as she burst into sobs that were wrenched from deep inside her. Concern had me tightening my arms because I could feel the pain emanating from her. And it was more. This was more than her relationship with Allegra.
We stood there so long, the arse pocket of my jeans vibrated as my phone rang on silent. It was most likely Allegra checking where I was.
Aria finally got control of herself and she released me. “Oh my God. I’m so sorry.” She wiped at the mascara now pooling around her eyes. The sisters looked just similar enough to know they were related. Both were beautiful, even when they sobbed.
Renewed guilt flushed through me because I shouldn’t have been such a bastard to her, even if I felt I was in the right. At the end of the day, she was Allegra’s sister, and my wife loved her sister so much, she was willing to protect her to the detriment of her own reputation. It was not up to me to interfere with that decision or treat her sister badly for it.
“You’ve no need. I’m sorry for being a prick.”
She shook her head, wiping at her pretty cheeks. “No. It’s nice to know someone is looking out for Ally. This wasn’t …” She gestured between us. “I …” Her eyes filled with water again as her gaze locked with mine. “I just found out I’m not pregnant.”
Oh. Shit.
“We’ve been trying for a year.” She sucked in a breath like she might burst into tears again any second.
“I’m sorry.” I reached out to squeeze her arm. “Does Allegra know?”
Aria shook her head. “We haven’t talked to anyone about it.” She shrugged, her smile wobbly with emotion. “I know there’re lots of options out there, but I just didn’t anticipate that this would be difficult for us, and I’m not handling it too well right now. And Ally and I feel further apart than ever and … ugh.” She waved a hand. “Never mind.” Her eyes widened in horror. “Jared, I’m … I don’t know why I just blurted that out to you.”
“Because you clearly needed to tell someone.” I considered her, seeing her in a totally different light from before. I’d never seen her let her guard down like this. Which meant she needed someone who loved her right now. “Are you in a hurry to get home?”
She shook her head sadly. “No. North is in LA.”
“Then come back with me. I have some work to do in my office and you can talk to Allegra.”
Aria bit her lip, considering it. Finally, she asked uncertainly, “Are you sure?”
“You need her. And she needs to know that you need her.”
Fresh tears brightened her eyes and she laughed unhappily. “I swear, I am not usually this emotional.”
“You should cry as much as you want to and never be embarrassed for it,” I told her as I lifted the bag of wine off the ground and then took hers too. When I was a boy, growing up where I did, we were made to feel less of a man if we showed emotion. I’d learned from my grandfather, the most masculine man I’d ever known, that crying didn’t make you weak. It made you human. “Come on.”
Her smile this time was a little warmer, a little less sad. “Okay.”
As always, sunlight streamed in through the curtains and woke me before my alarm. As always, since Allegra started sharing my bed, I lingered, waiting for the alarm instead of jumping out of it like I used to. Her soft, warm body tucked against mine made it difficult to get out of bed these days.
Last night was the first night, other than when Allegra had her period, that we didn’t have sex. As promised, I’d brought Aria home and then I’d made myself scarce in the office. I’d answered emails from the company building the pods, from produce contacts, from my land agent, catching up on everything that had piled up over the last week. I could hear tears from the living room and, thankfully, I also heard laughter.
Trying not to focus on the sisters meant focusing on work. And focusing on work only reminded me that I’d married Allegra for her money. That had been fine when it was just a business deal. But now that we were together for real, the money element left a bad taste in my mouth. I didn’t want her to believe I was with her for her money. I didn’t want other people to think that. I certainly didn’t want to feel like money sat between us as an inevitable wall. Allegra would always have more money than me. Something that wouldn’t bother me so long as I didn’t feel like I, or the farm, was beholden to her financially.
Nowthat was definitely the case.
But if I could get the glamping pods up and running, then perhaps over time I could build enough capital to invest in more holiday lets on the land. Granddad wanted the land to remain a farm, but in this economy it couldn’t exist as that. The land needed to bring in profit in other ways, and holiday lets seemed like the thing that made most sense. Perhaps I could even build a holiday park with facilities. It was something to consider. There was enough unused land to do it.
The alarm cut through the bedroom, and I reluctantly eased from my wife’s warm body to switch it off.
I felt her sigh as she awoke.
Rolling back into her, I pulled her into my chest. “You okay?” I murmured in her ear.
Last night the sisters had talked for hours. Allegra had asked Aria to stay, but she’d insisted on calling a guard from the estate to pick her up and take her home. As soon as the SUV had driven out of sight, Allegra had hugged me tight.
“Did you tell her … anything?” I asked.
“No.” She raised her head, eyes lit with guilt. “She’s hurting enough right now without finding out about our dad. I meant it when I said that she doesn’t need to know.”
“I’m sorry if I caused trouble.”
“You didn’t,” she assured me. “You actually … Aria used to believe that something had happened to me to drive me off the rails as a teen. But I think over time, because I didn’t confide in her, she started to think I was kind of a natural-born disaster. You reminded her tonight that I’m not. And that’s enough for me.”
“Is it enough for her?”
Allegra shrugged sadly. “I don’t know. But right now she has more on her mind than me.” Tears filled her eyes. “I hate seeing her in pain. I mean, I know she and North will figure it out, but I hate that it’s going to be a struggle for them to have a baby. And … oh, Ari is so tough on herself. She feels like she’s letting North down, which is ridiculous. I …” She nibbled on her bottom lip, looking very much like her sister. “I texted North while Ari was in the bathroom. He needs to know how upset she is.”
“Will he come home?”
“Already on his way. He literally texted back in two seconds ‘on my way.’” Allegra smiled. “Nothing matters more to him than my sister.”
The longing in her voice did something to me. I … I realized that I wanted her to know that’s how I felt about her. But I couldn’t quite find the words.
Instead, I’d led her upstairs and helped her undress for bed, pulling her into my arms and telling her to sleep because she needed it after the emotional intensity of the evening.
Now, Allegra turned in my arms to face me. She pressed a soft kiss to my mouth and nuzzled her temple against my beard like a contented cat. “I’m good.”
And that’s when I finally found the words. “I want you to know that you are what matters most to me now.”
She lifted her gaze, those big brown eyes gleaming with wonder. “Really?”
I rested my forehead against hers. “Really.”
“I feel the same,” she whispered, voice hoarse with emotion. “You matter more than anything.”
Too much feeling coursed through me, I couldn’t speak. How the hell did I get so lucky to have found a wife who was … my best friend?
“No one makes me feel as safe as you do, Jared. I didn’t think I would ever find that.” She wrapped her arms around me and buried her face in my neck.
And I vowed then and there that I would always be her safe place, and I’d never let anything harm this woman ever again.