Someday Never Came

Chapter Twenty-Four

Taking full advantage of still being tired, I sleep for another several hours. For once, I’m able to fall asleep easily with the help of her smell still lingering in my bed. For the first time in years, I’ve slept in well past noon. A quick trip to the bathroom is needed before I head down the hall to the kitchen and living area. Grayson eyes me with a grin the moment I step into the room. He raises an eyebrow, causing deep wrinkles to appear on his forehead.

“Don’t start,” I grumble out in warning.

“Didn’t say a word, now did I?” Grayson teases, as if he has some inkling of an idea about what went down last night.

“Nothing happened,” I protest.

“Is that so?” Grayson chuckles, his grin turning smug. “Must have been nothing worth repeating this morning, at least for her.”

“What the hell does that mean?” I question, my voice raising an octave as I demand an answer. It might be past noon, but I am not about to deal with this bullshit without coffee.

“Well, you say nothing happened. I am saying nothing impressive must have happened, since she snuck out of your room this morning,” he replies, watching me go about making coffee. “Imagine my surprise when I’m sitting here, minding my business after my morning run, while Wyhtt is having his coffee waiting on your little Serenity to go shopping when all of a sudden we hear a door squeak. Only to look up and see her sneaking out of your room, on tip toes, in nothing more than a t-shirt and some very lacy underwear. But I’m sure you’re right, nothing happened . . . ”

Silence falls over the kitchen as he props his hand under his chin, grinning at me like an idiot while batting his lashes.

“Fine . . . we kissed, that’s all. We watched a movie and fell asleep.” Well, that was all I was going to tell him at least. “Did she really sneak out?” I ask over my shoulder.

“Yeah, looked like a teenager who had been caught red-handed after staying out past curfew.” He chuckles as I hit the buttons needed for coffee to start dripping into the pot.

“Wyhtt did not help that scenario as I am sure you can imagine.”

I can’t help the chuckle that escapes me as I pour some coffee. Grayson returns to his task of finishing last night’s dishes.

“Need any help, brother?” I offer.

“No, just have a few dishes left.” Nodding, I breathe in the fresh air coming through the open windows. I feel as if everything is finally falling back into place. That maybe—just maybe—the universe has forgiven me for all my mistakes. Not only for the wrongs I have done to her, but for all the crimes I have committed against those who have been my enemy—if only by happenstance. Maybe God has forgiven my actions performed under the orders given to me. Maybe karma has given me a pass . . .

My thoughts are interrupted by the jarring sound of a plate shattering as it crashes against the wooden floorboards. Ceramic shards spray like stray bullets, surrounding Grayson and I. The blood drains from my face as my stomach and chest tighten. I’m no longer standing in the kitchen. I’m back behind enemy lines, where there’s no one else around and nowhere left to run. I try to suck in a breath, but I can’t. I’m stuck knowing my decisions are the reason I’m within the enemy’s encampment.

I see him, just as he sees me. The unidentified man raises his gun, yelling at me in a language I don’t understand. Despite his gun being raised, all echoes of gunfire cease—it’s just me now—the others are already captured or dead. My men . . . my entire squad is gone. I counter by raising my gun, but the moment my finger pulls the trigger, I’m met with a resounding click.

No more bullets, no more protection, all that’s left for me is death.

His gun is still aimed at me, unwavering. Resigned, I close my eyes, seeing her face as I realize I will never see my sweet Serenity again. With my heart pounding in my chest, I hear an echo of my name.

The call to me is faint as I prepare for death. I prepare for the pain of the bullet’s impact before I’m tackled to the rough sandy ground. A deep boom makes everything else fade away as I see him—this fucking kid, Averie—the youngest man in my unit. He is alive, and it’s only us left. How is he alive? Wait. Blood—so much blood—covers him as I realize he took the bullet that had been meant for me.

“Run, run, run, run, RUN!” Averie pleads. I can’t—I can’t leave him here. No man left behind.

“Jensen!” My name, I hear my name again—I know that voice. Nothing else sounds clear as I fade back into my personal hell. I can save him. I just have to get up and carry us out.

“I can save him!” I can tell I’m screaming from the ache in my throat. His dark brown eyes are closing—the eyes of a man I had only known for a few weeks, the man who was under my charge. He was a newlywed—he and his wife had a baby on the way. He was only twenty-fucking-one years old.

“No!” The sob bursts from me.

“Jensen! Snap out of it, man.” I’m being shaken before my face stings from cold water being thrown directly at me. “Goddamn it, Jensen. You are here. Look at me.” The man standing in front of me starts to slowly become clearer. His features are less fuzzy as he continues to talk. Not comprehending his words, I break into a thousand pieces. I crumble knowing I made it and nobody else did. The lone survivor.

“I couldn’t save him.” The words tumble out from my mouth as I repeat them between sobs. “I couldn’t save him.”

“I know, I know,” his words are somber. He’s watching me with wide eyes as I rise back to my feet, his hand ready to help steady me if I need it. I can’t recall when I fell to the floor—it could have been days or mere seconds ago. I’m disoriented and my lungs ache as I force myself to take a deep breath. “I’m sorry man, the plate just slipped. I tried to catch it. I had no idea it would set you off.” Grayson—a very much alive and not dying soldier—explains.

Confused, I look around trying to remind myself of where I am. I see the plate shattered across the floor. I look down to see the mug I had been holding is also now shattered into a million little pieces as coffee stains the floor.

A true representation of my life is shown around me. Karma didn’t give me a pass, she only wanted me to suffer more at her hands by allowing me a small taste of what could have been. Karma wants me to suffer. These broken dishes are simply a prediction, a harbinger of the troubles yet to come.

Laughter floats through the windows, growing closer by the second. Before I can finish composing myself, Serena stands in the doorway smiling brightly with Wyhtt, both completely unaware of the episode that just unfolded. My heart is still pounding and I’m still unsure of what’s real . . . of what can truly be trusted.

I can’t even account for her movement across the room before her hands are on mine, which despite my best effort, sends me into fight or flight. The tell-tale ringing in my ears is back and I can see her mouth moving, but the only thing I can focus on is getting the fuck out of this house—knowing that when given the option of fight or flight, I always choose fight. I need to get away from the hands on my body so I can focus on not hurting those around me while I bring myself back to reality.

“Jensen? You stable?” Grayson asks. I don’t respond to his question, to her chattering, or to the concern shining in Wyhtt’s eyes. I grab my keys and my wallet before bolting out the door and slamming it behind me as a clear message not to follow.