Something in the Air (Skylarks #3)

Chapter 14

14

Nadia went through to the reception to face Archie once again. Why had he come here? Did he have news about Monica and the baby?

Worrying about her sister was something she’d done her best to bury after having done it for so many years when they were growing up. But now, she couldn’t help herself from wondering all over again where she was, how she was, whether she was okay.

Archie was sitting on one of the seats at the far end of reception and she went straight over. As soon as Giles saw her, he ran towards her with so much joy, she wanted to burst into tears and hug him tightly.

‘I want to see a helicopter, Auntie Nadia,’ Giles blurted out.

‘Is that so?’ How could she maintain a frown when this wonderful little boy seemed so enamoured by her presence? Perhaps she was simply a novelty.

‘Can I go see one now?’

‘I’m not sure whether that’s possible today.’ And how was she going to face a barrage of questions from everyone she worked with when he was calling her auntie?

In a completely different tone, she addressed Archie. ‘What can I do for you?’ She might be worried but she still wanted to keep the extent of her concern hidden; she wanted to keep that part of herself away from those who’d hurt her.

Taken aback by her formality, he addressed Giles. ‘Why don’t you look out of the big glass doors, see whether you can spot the helicopter if it goes up?’

‘That’s a good idea.’ Nadia wanted to get this over with.

As soon as it was just them over this side, Archie asked, ‘Has she come here? Tried to get in touch? I’m running out of options, the police have nothing so far, I don’t know what to do.’

Being angry about the past and annoyed that it had found her in her safe place was easy to do when she was hiding behind terse text messages. It was much harder to do now they were less than a metre apart. Watching him, she could see the toll all of this was having on the man who had once been her friend. His usually handsome features held a sadness, a fear, and Nadia couldn’t help it; her heart went out to him.

‘No, I haven’t heard anything,’ she said. ‘I assure you I will text or call if that changes.’

‘Right.’

‘Does Giles still not know?’

‘No. But now he knows who you are, it’s distracted him from thinking more deeply about where his mum might be. He thinks that we’re here to spend time with you too. He’s really excited about that, Nadia.’

What was he doing to her? Trying to make her holding them at arm’s length impossible?

Disappointed, Giles came back over. ‘I can’t see the helicopter. Is it out the back?’

‘It is,’ she told him. ‘It’s on the helipad.’

‘Have you been in it?’

‘I rarely get to go out with The Skylarks; my job is here at the base.’ Her smile faltered when she looked Archie’s way again.

Vik had come into reception and Giles was onto it straight away and ran over to ask whether he was the pilot.

‘Giles…’ Archie’s voice warned. ‘I’m sorry,’ he called over to Vik.

‘No worries.’ And then to Nadia, Vik said, ‘Does this little guy belong to you? Because if he does, I’m happy to take him out to look around the helicopter if you need a minute.’

Her team knew nothing of who this man was, knew nothing about her history and yet they were intuitive.

‘Would you mind?’ she said. She would rather tell Archie to leave her alone when Giles wasn’t here. He didn’t deserve to pay the price for his mother’s or his father’s past mistakes. And she didn’t have it in her to be so cruel.

Once Giles happily followed Vik to see the air ambulance for himself, Nadia turned back to Archie. ‘I haven’t heard a thing about Monica or from Monica. You don’t need to come here. In fact, I’d really rather you didn’t.’

‘Like I said, I don’t know what else to do. I’m sorry if that makes things awkward.’

‘Are you? Because you’re still here.’ Arms folded, she stood her ground, although she wasn’t sure she was even convincing herself.

‘I’m here because I really think she’ll turn up looking for you.’

‘If she even knows this is where I work. Which, unless she’s seen the television appeal, she won’t. And the chances are slim of that, I’d say.’

‘Are you kidding? I saw it online three times after I saw it on television. She could easily have seen it. She’s been here a while, longer than me. And I still think about the baby, whether she’s mine.’

Nadia realised that what came through in his voice the most was desperation, a need for answers. It was the way some of the patients’ families she’d come across in her career sounded: the need to know what was going on, good or bad.

‘I told you her head was in a bad place,’ he went on. ‘She had depression on and off over the years; it was why we put off starting a family: she wasn’t sure whether she could handle it. And then she had postnatal depression after Giles. She wasn’t sure she could go through it all again with a second pregnancy. Now I’m wondering whether she’d been right to worry about that and something really did snap.’

So the depression had found her sister again, more than once. It was almost too much to think about. But her caring nature meant she couldn’t help but feel sympathetic because watching Archie reminded her very much of the members of families who’d given up hope, the families who knew bad news was on its way, it was just a matter of time.

Nadia uncrossed her arms and took a seat next to him. ‘Even for Monica, leaving a baby seems way too far-fetched. I really don’t think?—’

‘But it’s not impossible. Don’t you see?’ Head in his hands, he was falling apart. ‘When you first left Switzerland, she thought you might come back, but as time went on and reality hit that you weren’t, that was when it really got to her. I don’t think she ever fully moved on from what happened. She’s softened over the years, Nadia; she’s changed. You don’t know her any more. You made sure of that.’

She got up. ‘I can’t do this. I’m at work; you’ll have to go.’ And she started to walk away.

He stayed where he was but his voice, firmer than before, followed her. ‘She’s your sister. Your family. How can you turn your back when she might be out there, her head all over the place, so messed up that she left her baby?’

‘You don’t know that,’ she muttered, stopping by the reception desk before the corridor which passed through to the rear of the airbase and the hangar.

She leaned her back against the wall, closed her eyes. And she felt the tears well. The same tears she’d had when they were younger, at the frustration of her sister’s messy life impacting everyone else.

She hated that she still cared. She’d been telling herself for years that she didn’t and yet she knew that was the lie she’d repeated in her head in order to move forwards with her life.

She wiped the tears that formed unbidden and began to topple. But she wasn’t quick enough to do it before Archie came over to her.

He came to her side, rested his back against the wall too and she was reminded of the way his body had felt against hers as young adults, students, the times they’d had fun, other times they’d been intimate. They hadn’t been seeing each other as boyfriend and girlfriend for very long before she got pregnant and it was so much to cope with at a young age. When she lost the baby, they lost their way with each other, but she’d thought they’d always stay the best of friends. Except they hadn’t. Everything had changed when Monica had stomped on in and taken that away from her older sister.

‘Giles talked about you two falling out,’ said Archie.

‘What does he know?’

‘Not much – we’ve kept it that way. All he really knows is that you had an argument a long time ago. I didn’t think he’d be able to process the ins and outs; even I struggle to do that sometimes. But he says he understands.’

‘How so?’ She thought of the little boy who looked so much like Monica, it hurt.

‘A month ago, he had a falling out with a friend at playgroup. All very high-drama stuff over a Star Wars toy but he didn’t speak to the friend for a whole three days.’

She’d forgotten Archie and his ability to lift a situation even when it was dire. He’d always done that, but she’d left behind the memory as well as the person.

Neither of them spoke for almost a minute.

‘Do you think you’ll find her?’ Nadia asked eventually. ‘Do you think she’ll just show up or come home perhaps?’

‘She loves her son; she loves her baby. She loves me.’ He croaked the last part as though this might hurt Nadia the most. ‘I’m hoping we get news soon. I thought the police would laugh me out of the station but when I said she was pregnant and that the baby left here could be hers, they were a bit more serious. I told them about her history of mental illness – that’s what it was, Nadia; it wasn’t just her being your annoying little sister – she faced some real demons.’

‘I know.’

He grunted. ‘I apologise. I shouldn’t be lecturing you.’

‘You’re not.’ She stood up straight from the wall. ‘We should check on Giles.’ She led the way through the hangar and out near the helipad where Vik was showing Giles the cockpit.

‘Dad, this is awesome!’ her nephew cried out. ‘I want to fly one day!’

‘We’ll see about that. Come on, time we left these guys to it.’

Giles predictably complained but good-naturedly. Whoever her sister was these days, Monica had raised a wonderful little boy. And Nadia had missed all of it. Without children of her own, the fact hit her with an unexpected wave of pain.

Giles needed the toilet before they left so back inside the airbase, Nadia pointed him in the right direction.

Outside the bathroom, Archie faced her. ‘I can’t leave England until I’ve found her.’

‘I wouldn’t expect you to.’

‘She’s really changed. I wish you could see it for yourself. We are your family.’

And yet she still resisted. ‘Archie, this is my family.’ Her arms gesticulated to their surroundings. ‘My family is The Skylarks, the team here.’

Archie looked at her as though the bottom of his world might well have fallen out. He’d come here expecting his wife to have made contact. And now it seemed he didn’t know which way to turn.

Giles emerged from the bathroom at the same time as Vik came along the corridor from the office. ‘Thank you, Vik!’ he called out.

‘You’re welcome, buddy.’ He high-fived the little boy and Nadia swallowed down another wave of emotion. He was just like her sister had been at his age – bubbly, full of confidence, willing to talk to anyone no matter who they were. She’d been a beautiful kid until her teenage years when something in her seemed to have changed. Nadia had never seen it coming and she felt responsible for that in some way, like she should have.

The phones blared out their alert to another job and from where they were standing, they could see into the office where Kate was answering the call. Nadia explained to Giles what was happening when he slipped his little hand into hers. The sense of emergency must be frightening if he wasn’t used to it and the feel of his skin on hers broke down a few more of her defences.

Vik was all business and went outside to start up the helicopter. Kate was scribbling down details of the job. Brad passed them in the doorway to get the drugs and the bloods. Nadia explained it all to Giles in a low voice so as not to interrupt operations going on around them.

‘Collision between a car and a pedestrian,’ Kate informed Nadia quietly enough that Giles wouldn’t hear much.

Giles’s hand still in hers, Nadia followed Kate into the hangar. ‘How bad is it?’ she asked. Giles was mesmerised looking around, too enthralled with the helicopter starting up to listen to them.

Kate pulled on her jacket. ‘Female, age unknown, possible head trauma and injuries to the pelvis.’ She picked up her helmet. ‘There are signs she’s recently had a baby – her abdomen, bleeding.’

Nadia’s breath caught. ‘Do you think…’

‘No idea,’ said Kate, who knew Nadia was hinting about baby Lena but didn’t have time to pause and discuss it.

The whir of the blades on the helicopter beyond the hangar took Nadia’s breath away. She locked eyes with Archie, and realised she was clasping Giles’s hand too firmly as he began to squirm.

Nadia made a split-second decision. ‘I’m coming with you, Kate.’

Kate stopped in her tracks. ‘You’re what?’

‘Wait for me.’ She dropped Giles’s hand, grabbed the spare jacket, pulled it on and did the same with the helmet. When Frank came in with his toolbox, having been working on one of the rapid response vehicles, she told him to hold the fort.

He gave her a salute. He knew the deal.

Nadia didn’t want Giles to panic so as she did up her helmet, she told Archie, ‘This might take hours. Go to your accommodation; I’ll call you.’ And then she was following Kate.

On board Hilda, she simply said, ‘If it’s the birth mother, I want to be there,’ as if that explained everything. And with no time to waste, Vik confirmed that weight limits and fuel were good to go and they lifted into the skies above Whistlestop River.

‘ETA nine minutes,’ said Brad from his position in the cockpit as the technical crew member.

An update came in from the HEMS desk. Nadia could hear it; they all could over their headsets.

‘Victim. Female. In cardiac arrest. CPR being performed at the scene by an off-duty nurse.’

Nadia had to remind herself to breathe.

Please, please, please let the woman be all right.

Please, please, please don’t let it be Monica.

If it was, this might be the only chance Nadia got to make peace with her sister.

She felt sick. With every whir of the blades that took them closer to the road traffic collision, she felt worse, as if the blades were physically cutting through her.

Flashing lights guided Vik to their landing site on a cricket pavilion near where the accident had happened. And as they were cleared to disembark, HEMS wanted an update of The Skylarks’ ETA to the victim’s side. This meant they were desperately needed, which indicated that the patient must be worsening and might not survive without their specialist care.

‘Nadia!’ Kate shrieked as she and Brad loaded up with all the gear.

Nadia had frozen. Her legs wouldn’t budge.

‘Nadia!’ But Kate didn’t wait. She couldn’t; her job was to get to the victim, not to look after the woman who’d come along with them and couldn’t move.

Nadia sat in the back of the helicopter listening to the updates from the HEMS desk come through one after the other from the road ambulance paramedics and then from her own team as they reached the victim and did everything they could at the scene.

Vik’s job was to wait by the helicopter. He climbed in the back and wrapped a blanket around Nadia’s shoulders. He asked no questions; she offered no explanation.

When a bystander came over to the helicopter, Vik apologised to Nadia before jumping out to talk with them. This happened a lot; people took an interest.

It felt like she’d been sitting there forever and then another update came, this time from Kate, letting everyone on the channel know what the status at the scene was.

‘The patient re-arrested. There was almost forty minutes of prolonged CPR but the patient was pronounced dead at 15.43.’

Nadia leapt out of the helicopter. The blanket dropped from her shoulders. She ran towards the blue lights, she saw the crowd of first responders, the scene calmer than it would’ve been when they first arrived. She saw her crew; Brad came towards her.

‘We tried our best,’ he said.

Nadia’s feet took her the rest of the way, flashbacks of Monica when they were little girls playing schools in the back garden, zipping up and down the pavements on their bikes, making cupcakes and splattering the mixture everywhere except where it was meant to go.

And as she saw the victim on the ground, blonde hair just like hers splayed out in disarray, she sank to her knees.