Chapter 5
5
G lowing eyes peer down at me, almost too bright to look into as my consciousness returns. The blurriness at the edges of my vision fades, and as things come fully into focus, my heart leaps into my chest. My limbs still feel heavy from the sedative that shikzeth shot me with, and I recall the blinding pain in my hand when I tried to fight them with a wince.
“Shh, it’s okay. No one is going to hurt you,” the seladin looking down at me croons softly. There’s a concerned set to the markings on their brow, and their smile is close-lipped, no doubt in an attempt to not frighten me with the sight of their razor-sharp fangs.
The memory of the seladin—Hadrell, I vaguely recall—giving me a much wider smile when I suggested going back to their ship, and the accompanying surge of nervous arousal when they agreed comes to mind.
Wait, that can’t be right.
If I was the one that asked him to take me back to his place, then this wasn’t some nefarious scheme to steal me away.
I groan, heat washing over my cheeks at the realization and subsequent memories of how deranged I behaved earlier. “You’re not going to sell me to some alien pervert, are you?” I ask, sighing.
Their eyes flare brighter and they let out a surprised snort. “No, I’m most definitely not. I might be a little hard up for credits right now, but I draw the line at slavery.”
“This was a mistake,” I murmur, my voice raspy from all the terrified shouting I did earlier.
“Which part?” he asks, and I can tell he’s fighting hard not to laugh at me.
“All of it.” I try to push myself up on my wobbly arms so I’m not lying down like a pathetic lump while I have this conversation. One arm gives out because the hand that I injured is now completely numb, and before I tumble off the side of the table, Hadrell grabs my arm to steady me.
“Careful,” they say, the hint of laughter in their smooth voice making them sound infuriatingly sexy.
The rational, protective part of my mind says I should pull away immediately from their touch, but my body practically melts at the contact.
Must be an aftereffect of the sedative. Let’s go with that and not that I’m so touch-starved I’ll take anything I can get, no matter how awkward.
“I was worried you were going to punch me when you woke up. Bret’u warned me how… distressed you were.” Hadrell chuckles softly, like the thought of my altercation with the shikzeth is funny .
That’s enough to make me pull back from his touch and scowl at him.
He’s amused by my terror, but he’s the one that jumped us to god knows where and left me alone in his room, disoriented and unsure of what was happening. “I’m glad this is funny to you, because it’s not quite as amusing from where I’m sitting. Maybe it’s different for you, but I don’t exactly make it a habit of being in firefights on a stranger’s ship and getting jumped across the galaxy against my will.”
Their expression sobers at my sharp tone. “Sorry. You’re right. It’s not funny at all. It’s been a fa-shar nightmare of a cycle, and the best coping mechanism I have at times like this is to laugh at the situation. I know kidnapping you isn’t a laughing matter. In case it’s not clear, it wasn’t intentional. At all. I’d much prefer it if you weren’t here.”
I know they’re trying to reassure me, but a ridiculous part of me bristles when they say they wish I wasn’t here. I wish I wasn’t here either! They just didn’t have to be so blunt about it.
“That makes two of us,” I say, hoping my bruised ego doesn’t show on my face. “The sooner I can get back to Spire, the better.”
“About that…” Hadrell starts, but I plaster on my calm, easy smile that I’ve learned to implement in situations that stress me the fuck out, but I need to be professional. Hadrell may not have kidnapped me intentionally, but he still holds my life, or at least my current safety, in his claws.
“The embassy will search for me.” I keep my voice calm, but infuse as much gravity to the statement as I dare to without risking overselling it. The shikzeth medic seemed reluctant to believe that I’m the human ambassador, but maybe I can convince Hadrell.
Technically, I’m not lying to him. I’m sure that my coworkers are wondering where the hell I am since I never miss work without giving prior notice. “Drop me off at the closest transit station and we can be done with this fiasco.”
Rather than looking chastened by my serious tone, Hadrell gives me a charming smile far more persuasive than the one I’ve managed. “Apologies, Ambassador , but that’s not possible.”
The facetious, accusatory way they emphasize the title catches me off guard. “Why not?” I sputter indignantly, then catch myself, lowering my voice. This isn’t going well at all and I need to keep my shit together or Hadrell won’t take me seriously. “I understand that doing so may be inconvenient for you, but do you want a diplomatic incident on your hands?”
Hadrell sighs. “No, I definitely don’t.”
“Well, then, what’s the problem?” I ask, my words coming out a little more curt than intended. “You mentioned being short on credits, and I’m sure the Coalition and Xi Consortium would provide a reward for my safe return.”
They shake their head and laugh, the sound low and wry. “I’m sure they would. But seeing as my crew and I have been flagged for void knows what reason as a threat by Spire security, and therefore the Consortium, I doubt they’ll be willing to negotiate a peaceful hostage transfer.”
I deflate, my assertive posture flagging as reality sets in. Hadrell may not have intended to spirit me away, but he’s a pirate who is apparently persona non grata to the Consortium. I can only guess what terrible crimes someone would have to commit to be considered that level of a threat.
Panic swells inside me. “What? What did you do?” I ask in an undignified squeak.
Hadrell opens their mouth to reply, but my mind is racing now, the anxiety and need to escape surging. “Please tell me you’re not a terrorist!”
“I’m—”
I shake my head and push back as far away as I can get from Hadrell on the exam table, my legs curling up to my chest since I’ve learned that fleeing isn’t a feasible option for me. “Shit, was this all a ruse, and you put some kind of mind-altering drug in my drink to make me want to ask you to go back to your place, and you’re part of an anti-human gang of criminals looking to make an example of me? Because I’m not worth it!” I blurt. “You’ve got the wrong guy. I’m a mid-level clerk at the embassy. I’m nobody!”
One of Hadrell’s dotted brows creeps up to their hairline, and the iris of their cybernetic eye narrows. “Ah, so you’re not the ambassador after all.”
I blink at him. “Shit.” I grimace and cover my face with my hands, wishing I could shut everything out, and that when I remove them, I’ll be back in my bed on Spire and this will all just be a terrible dream brought on by too much alcohol.
“Paul, it’s completely understandable that you’re scared. I know you have no reason to trust me or my intentions, but I promise I won’t hurt you.” Hadrell wraps their fingers around my wrist, and while I startle at their touch, I let them draw my hand away from my face. “Neither will my crew—accidents aside,” they say, tracing their thumb over my palm, which tingles at their touch. I’d think it’s from the numbing agent that’s wearing off, but it’s far too pleasurable.
A flush creeps up my neck that has nothing to do with my embarrassment for freaking out for the third time in a few hours. I hastily pull my hand from their grip, and Hadrell frowns.
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I thought…” The tips of their ears have become a darker shade of gray and their eyes flare brighter, which I know can signify embarrassment in seladin—a fact I learned from my friend Fina’s seladin partner, Maerlon .
Why are they embarrassed? I’m the one who keeps making a complete fool of myself. “It’s fine.”
“No, it’s really not,” he sighs. “Nothing about this situation is fine, but if you let me, I’ll do everything I can to make it as enjoyable as possible for you.”
I raise a skeptical brow at that statement, and he chuckles. “Okay, what about as safe as possible?”
“Neither seems likely, given your track record,” I scoff, unable to suppress a slight smile of my own.
“Ouch! I’ll have you know the events of the last cycle are highly unusual for me. I’ve never once had the Consortium more than mildly perturbed by my actions.” They sound shockingly sincere and confused by recent events.
“So then, what happened that made them want to blast your ship into pieces?” I ask, praying that Hadrell isn’t lying to me.
“Stars, I wish I knew. We took on one simple job while I was on the station for Mezli’s bonding ceremonies, so it must have something to do with that, even though nothing about the cargo we picked up was suspicious. But I’ll figure it out, and when I do, someone’s going to have a word with Kha-shar .”
Their last word doesn’t translate. “Is that the name of your boss?”
They give me a wicked, fanged grin, reaching down to rest a hand on their thigh. “My blaster,” they correct.
“Oh,” I squeak. “Right.” I reflexively curl myself into a tighter ball, all hope of keeping my dignity blown out the airlock with the reality of the pirate sitting next to me armed with a blaster they could use to end me whenever they want. I’ve already admitted that I’m not the ambassador. I told them that no one will care much that I’m gone. So what’s stopping Hadrell from deciding I’m too much of a liability or nuisance and putting a bolt between my eyes or dumping me out into space?
Hadrell must see the mounting fear in my eyes, because he quickly removes his hand from atop the blaster and holds it up in the air. “ Esh’et , you’re a nervous one, aren’t you?” He runs his hand through his silky silvery-white hair, looking almost sheepish. “I didn’t mean that as a threat to you. You’re safe. I only use my weapons to protect myself and my crew. I’ll add my handsome human captive to that list, so you don’t need to worry,” he says with a wink.
There’s a perplexing burst of arousal and horror inside of me at their words.
This alien has killed. They have a blaster they’ve given a name, and they’re going to kill whoever put them in this situation. Of course they will. They’re a pirate who has no qualms about breaking the law. They can do whatever they want to their “handsome human captive”.
My cock twitches at the thought, and I grimace. What the fuck is wrong with me that the thought of this seladin pirate having me at his mercy is making my dick perk up? Maybe I hit my head the last time I blacked out. That’s got to be it, because the alternative is far too pathetic, even for me.
“Come on,” Hadrell says, extending a hand to me with a soft smile that contrasts with the deadly gleam that crossed his expression when he mentioned killing the person who set him up.
“Wh-what? Where are we going?”
“You’re my guest for the time being. I want to introduce you to the rest of the crew, and figure out where you’re bunking. Maybe get something hot and filling inside you, if you’re amenable.”
My face flames. “Uh, what?” I sputter.
They laugh, their incandescent white eye glowing brighter. “ Bad choice of words. Unless…” They laugh again and shake their head. “I meant food. Rema picked up some porridge that’s fairly decent and universally safe to eat. I don’t know about you, but I’m pretty hungry after the events of the past cycle.”
I have no desire to eat, and I certainly don’t want to go talk to a bunch of strangers. It’s a struggle to not curl into a ball again, but I don’t let myself.
I need to get myself together. I’m a trained diplomatic, for fuck’s sake, not a crying little boy off world for the first time. If I reframe this situation, I can get through it. Hadrell and his crew are just another group of aliens looking for a cultural exchange with the Coalition.
A deadly, lawless group.
No, stop it.
I’ve been involved with countless treaties, meetings, and negotiations. I won’t let myself devolve into a trembling human in the face of something unexpected. Sure, that’s happened multiple times already, but I don’t have to let it color the rest of my time stuck here.
I need to be brave.
My gut clenches, and I reach out and take Hadrell’s proffered hand. The markings on their brow raise slightly, but a moment later their slender, long fingers wrap around my palm and they guide me off the exam table with surprising gentleness.
I wobble a little, and their grip on my hand helps keep me steady. I expect them to release my hand once I’m stable, but they keep it trapped in their grip, soft but insistent as they give me a light tug toward the corridor.
I should ask them to let go. Going to meet their crew while being led by the hand like a wayward child is not an ideal way to begin negotiations. Yet I cling to them, afraid that if I let go, the oddly bolstering effect of their touch will dissipate and I’ll crumple to the floor.
As we walk down the corridor hand in hand, the liquor-soaked memory of them holding my hand as we weaved through the walkways from the banquet hall to their ship sends a tingle of heat through me.
The entire walk, I’d imagined them tugging me into an alley and pressing me up against a building to cage me in and kiss me until we were both breathless. I’d thought about them skating their elegant hands down my body and being unable to hide how hard their long, slick gray tongue down my throat made me. I imagined letting them fuck me out where anyone could see. Letting everyone see what a filthy little human slut I was for them.
My cock jerks in my pants and I finally yank my hand out of Hadrell’s grip with a furious blush, clasping it together with my other hand in front of my traitorous dick. Fuck, now is not the time to get a boner.
Hadrell glances back over his shoulder and gives me a questioning look.
My cheeks burn even more under my beard and I attempt to think of disgusting things to make my cock deflate before they notice it.
Their cybernetic eye scans over my face while their glowing one stays locked on my eyes. “Are you unwell? You’re turning a very deep shade of red. If you’re feeling lightheaded, let me know and I can carry you so you don’t collapse again.”
“I’m fine! I just… I need to use the hygiene unit,” I blurt, scrambling for any reason to get away from him for a minute and get myself together.
“Oh! Of course.” They point to a door a few meters down the corridor. “Crew facilities are in there. ”
I give them a curt nod and scurry away. As I do, there’s a sharp inhale, followed by a suppressed snort.
I spin around on my heels and glare at Hadrell. “You know, you could at least wait until I’m out of the room to laugh at me.” To my absolute horror, I realize hot tears are welling in my eyes. Can this situation get any more embarrassing?
“I’m not, it’s?—”
“I get that I’m a joke to you. A scared, weak human acting like a fool. But I didn’t choose to be here. And if the situation were reversed, I’d have enough compassion and common courtesy to not mock someone who is struggling.”
“Your pants,” Hadrell says with a slight grimace. “They’re, uh, they’re ripped in the back. I shouldn’t have laughed, but it took me by surprise.”
I reach back, patting my ass to find an enormous tear going up all the way from my taint to the top of my butt crack. I squeak and keep my hands covering the rip as best I can. “Fuck, these were my favorite pants.” Why that of all things is what comes out of my mouth is a mystery to me, but Hadrell gives me a sympathetic look.
“They were very nice. They hugged your…” He clears his throat. “They were well-tailored and I know that’s difficult to find when your species is in the minority on Spire. I’ll go find you something else to wear while you’re in there.” They take a step away, then pause. “Please don’t try to run away or attack another one of my crewmates while I’m gone.”
I sigh, too defeated by my escape attempts thus far to even consider disobeying their request. “I won’t.”