4. Colt
CHAPTER FOUR
colt
I’d loved Sarah Bently since the day she showed up in Citrus Cove.
I’d never forget the day she stepped into our classroom. Back then, she’d been blonde with sun-kissed skin, freckles over her nose, and honey eyes full of so much sadness she hurt to look at.
Making her smile had become my number one mission in life.
Now, years later, it was still my mission. One I was failing miserably at.
The back door to the cafe slammed shut, and I stood there wondering how many times I’d watch her walk away from me in my lifetime.
I rubbed my chest. The ache never went away.
It didn’t matter who I slept with. It didn’t matter who I dated. When I saw Sarah, my world stopped.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, snapping me back to reality. I pulled it out and answered as I headed back to my truck, eyeing the one that looked like David’s. He’d need balls of steel to show his face in Citrus Cove again, and part of me wished he would.
“What?” I asked.
Cam snorted on the line. “Okay. Hi to you as well. What’s wrong?”
He knew me too damn well. “I saw a truck that looked like David’s pull into the cafe. Sarah works Thursdays, so I stopped to check.”
“Ah. I assume it wasn’t him or else you’d be calling from the station.”
“Correct,” I said, memorizing the license plate. I got back into my Ford and started it up, the engine humming to life. Heat blasted, filling the cabin with warmth as I leaned my head back against the seat.
“Do you want to come over for dinner? Haley decided to have a night in with Emma and the boys. I’m rounding up Hunter and Sammy. I’ve got steaks and beer.”
I couldn’t help but perk up at the thought of seeing Sammy again today. Plus, it didn’t take much to convince me. “Yeah, I’ll head your way.”
The drive to Cam’s was one I knew by heart. It had been an adjustment now that I couldn’t pop in whenever I felt like it. There were parts of my friendship I missed with Cam, but Haley was the best damn thing to happen to him. She was like a sister to me, and I loved her as much as I loved him.
I rolled down their driveway and wasn’t surprised to see Sammy’s car. He must have just pulled up, because he opened the door as I parked beside him.
The two of us were opposites, standing side by side. I was comfortable with my height at almost six feet, but Sammy was as tall as a goddamn basketball player. He had pitch-brown hair and stormy blue eyes and was the kind of guy I’d be drooling over if he wasn’t my best friend’s brother.
He was also five years younger than me—which didn’t mean anything—but I liked to use that fact to tame my slutty imagination. Especially when I could have sworn I made him blush this morning at his apartment.
“Howdy,” I called.
Sammy gave me a dry smile. “So you’ve been lured here with steak and beer too, huh?”
“Yup. Shocked to see you out and about this late.”
He shrugged. “It’s been weird without the winery.”
I nodded, feeling the same way. The old barn had been in the Harlow family for generations, and it’s been nine months since it burned down. Construction was starting up after we got through February. We’d been working on the blueprints and plans with a contractor who was a friend of Hunter’s.
“Thanks for the pizza again,” I said. “And coffee. They were delicious. I definitely ate the entire thing in one sitting.”
Sammy smiled. “Thanks. It was fun to make. Hunter rejected it since it didn’t have meat on it.”
So he hadn’t thought of me first. Which was totally reasonable, and definitely meant I was overthinking him blushing earlier.
Speaking of the devil, Hunter’s truck pulled up next to mine and he hopped out. “I brought better beer and poker cards.”
“And money to lose?” Sammy asked.
Hunter snorted as I opened the front door. The three of us piled in, and per Haley’s house rule, we kicked off our boots and placed them on the shoe… whatever the fuck it was called. A shoe cabinet?
Sammy bumped into me and grabbed my shoulders to steady me.
“Tall motherfucker,” Hunter muttered.
“You’re just jealous,” Sammy quipped.
He gave me a smirk, his hands still warm on my shoulders. Finally, he released me and I turned away. Why the fuck did he have to end up so hot and why the fuck did his hands feel good and fuck ? —
“Cam?” I called.
The silence made me anxious and all the other thoughts fell away. I wasn’t the only one who didn’t like the silence. Hunter immediately pushed past me and headed for the back door, his shoulders relaxing once he looked out.
“He’s outside,” he announced. “Looks like he’s finishing the steaks.”
Sammy and I both breathed out.
We were all still jumpy. David Connor had always been a son of a bitch, but finding out he had an evil twin had fucked with all of us. It was some next level bullshit.
I heard Cam and Hunter talking and stole a glance at Sammy. He was always so quiet. I’d known him my entire life and still didn’t know him.
“There’s a truck that looks like David’s in town,” I said. “Just so you know. I saw it pull into the cafe while Sarah was working.”
He let out a quiet hum. “Wasn’t him?”
“Nope.”
Sammy pressed his lips together. His voice was quiet as he spoke. “I think he knows better than to come back here. We aren’t the only one’s gunning for him. All of the women his brother killed … their families are angry. I read an article recently.”
“An article?”
“Yeah, another one.”
“You’d think the media would pick something else to talk about,” I sighed. I worried about Sarah and the boys more when the news circled the story about Thomas again.
Sammy nodded. “I’ve been keeping an eye on it. People are furious. They want someone to blame. I think I’d worry more about Sarah and the boys, but Emma has a black belt in martial arts. Plus, Cam installed a security system. I don’t think anyone will break in or bother them.”
“What?” I snorted, thinking about the pint-sized Barbie. “Does Emma really have a black belt?”
“Yeah,” he laughed. “I run into her sometimes at the store.”
“Are the two of you going to stand at the door chatting like hens?” Cam called. “Or are you coming to the kitchen?”
The two of us scoffed. I left the foyer for the kitchen and Sammy followed behind. My skin prickled with an acute awareness of him as I grabbed a beer, using the counter top to pop the cap off.
Hunter pointed at me. “I want one.”
“Already on it, hoss.”
I opened each of us a beer as Cam brought in the steaks on a platter. They smelled great, looked great. He’d long since perfected the art of grilling, and I took full advantage of that, especially since I hated cooking.
Sammy scowled at his brother. “Surely we have something more than just steak,” he said.
“Like what?” Cam asked. “We have meat and beer. What else do we need?”
“My god, how does Hal stay married to you?”
“Not sure you want to know.” Cam smirked at the innuendo. “Also, I cook better for her than I do for you ugly bastards.”
“I feel loved,” Hunter said as he took a swig of his beer.
Sammy laughed. “You got any veggies? Potatoes? Something?”
“There are veggies in the fridge.”
“I’ll cook some up. ”
None of us protested. If Sammy cooked it, we typically ate it, even if it were veggies. He made a bet with Hunter that he’d get everyone to eat brussel sprouts over the holidays and damned if he hadn’t won a hundred bucks off him.
“Done any real work lately?” Hunter teased.
“Oh fuck off,” Sammy said. “You wish you could do what I do.”
“Any viral videos?” Cam asked, leaning against the counter next to me.
Sammy shrugged as he pulled out an air fryer and dug in the fridge for vegetables. “A few. It’s all going well.”
He’d started a content channel a couple years ago. Every video I saw was expertly filmed and was of him doing sexy chef things. The comments were often filled with people either giving him shit or begging him to spit in their mouth in the most unashamed way possible. It was alarming sometimes to see what people said to him. I didn’t try to creep on him but sometimes found myself scrolling his page while thinking a little too fondly of his forearms.
“Finger any more grapefruits?” I teased.
He shot me a dirty look. “Why don’t you watch and find out? Better yet, how about you subscribe to my YouTube so it shows up for you every morning?”
I grinned. “Alright, chill out. For the record, I’m already subscribed. Your videos deeply concern me sometimes, but the recipes are good. Not that I cook any of them. But the pizza you made was fucking delicious.”
He relaxed a fraction as he threw broccoli and carrots in the air fryer with some oil and seasonings. “Thanks. The veggies will take a few minutes.”
“Paper plates?” I asked Cam.
“Nope,” Cam said with a grin. “We have real plates in this house. ”
“My man is whipped,” I teased. “A shoe cabinet. Real plates. What the hell happened?”
He grinned even brighter and got the plates together. “I love her so damn much.”
“We know,” we all echoed.
It was cute and romantic and we all envied him just a little. Well, I envied feeling that sort of love for someone. The only person I’d ever come close to that with was Sarah, but that was a long time ago and clearly unreturned. Everyone else I’d been with over the years had never reached that part of me. I’d come to accept that no one else ever would.
Hunter pulled out knives, forks, and napkins and carried them to the table. The dining room adjoined the kitchen and soon we were all seated at the table, plates full of steaks and veggies and cold beers cracked open. Cards were dealt and we played a slow round of poker, catching up about everything happening in our sleepy town. The Old Spur Museum was getting some new updates, Citrus Cove Park was being renovated, and the apartment complexes right outside of town were expanding. Our conversations looped in a circle, coming right back around to David Connor.
“You sure it wasn’t David?” Cam asked me, referencing the truck I’d seen. He rubbed his beard with a frown.
“Yeah,” I said. “But I saw Sarah out back.”
“Was she okay?” Sammy asked.
“She said she was,” I sighed.
“So, no then,” Hunter said. He leaned back in his chair. His hair was a little long right now, a few stray silver strands sprouting around his temples. He looked like a more rugged version of his brothers, slightly older, and a little shorter. “I mean, how could she be? We made it through the holidays without any issues but they let David go.”
“ What ?” I asked, shocked. Why the fuck would they do that? That changed everything. “I thought he was being charged with accessory to murder? Wasn’t he in jail?”
“He got a good lawyer,” Hunter said with a grimace. No one could ever accuse Hunter of not caring—I swore he was always fully aware of everything happening in and out of Citrus Cove. Haley, Sarah, and the boys were now part of the family, which meant they got the full Harlow protection treatment. It was a good place to be.
I was certain he did the same for Emma even though he claimed she was the bane of his existence and despised him.
“They’ve been arguing that he didn’t know. They managed to get him acquitted. Now the story is that David was completely unaware of what his brother was up to and he never concealed anything or helped him.”
“That’s bullshit,” I growled. “How the fuck did he get a good lawyer? Isn’t he supposed to be paying child support?”
Hunter held up his hands. “Don’t shoot the messenger. Just what I’ve heard. I’ve been keeping up with it.”
“Does Sarah know?” Sammy asked, looking at Cam.
I already knew the answer, but didn’t interrupt Cam as he spoke.
“Considering I didn’t know and to my knowledge Haley doesn’t either, I doubt it. I don’t think David has paid Sarah a dime. She’s been taking care of those boys like she always has. She works her ass off and hates accepting help. I get it, but it’s hard to watch as someone who’s come to know and love her.”
I had to remind myself to breathe. I looked away from the three of them as I took a sip of beer, trying to keep my emotions in check. But it was hard when my thoughts were on her.
“She’s been through too damn much,” I whispered.
Cam hummed in agreement. “She is doing better though. I think Emma has really been good for her.”
Hunter grunted but didn’t argue. He and Emma could barely stand to be in the same room together, like oil and water. I liked Hunter, but I didn’t understand why Emma pissed him off so much.
I could understand, however, why he pissed her off. Even though he cared, he was gruff and grumpy and an ass most of the time.
The rest of dinner was nice, but I still couldn’t stop thinking about Sarah. Even as the night wound down and I switched from beer to water, she was on my mind.
I’d been trying to give her space. It wasn’t right to push for a relationship after all that had happened, but…
I wanted to be in her life.
I just wasn’t sure if she’d let me.
The day she got married was still etched in my mind, like it had happened yesterday. She’d been so sure of David, so certain he was the one. Meanwhile, it was clear I’d made the biggest mistake of my life not going after her. From the time we stopped talking to the day she got married, all I did was pine and torture myself over her.
Cam clapped me on the back and snapped me out of my thoughts as I washed dishes. “What’s up with you?”
Hunter and Sammy were busy chatting at the table. I shook my head, keeping my voice low. “I worry about her.”
“Have you thought about asking her out?”
My head snapped up. “ What ?”
Cam crossed his arms. “I’m just… it’s not a fucking secret that you love her. I figured you would have made a move by now.”
“Her husband’s brother almost killed her sister, and… I don’t want to push anything.”
“But if you keep waiting, someone else will swoop in.”
That was my biggest fear.
I couldn’t let her go this time.
“She barely talks to me,” I said. “Don’t worry about me, Cam. I’m fine.”
“Why did she stop talking to you in the first place?”
He’d never asked me so pointedly, and I didn’t have to answer because Sammy came into the kitchen.
“I’m about to head out,” he said. “I need to get ready for tomorrow.”
“You mean you want to get in bed and read a book,” Cam said.
“Well. Yeah, that too. Goodnight, thanks for dinner. See you Sunday.”
“Love you,” Cam said.
“Love you too.”
I glanced over my shoulder as Sammy walked out, peeling my gaze off his ass.
He had no right to look that good in denim.
Cam and I finished up the dishes right as Hunter came back to the kitchen. He gave me a glance that meant he had something to say.
“Colt, have you talked to your dad recently?”
It took every ounce of control not to tell Hunter to fuck off. But, I knew he wasn’t asking to upset me. “Why?”
“I saw him at the store the other day and he stopped me. Asked about you.”
“Shocking,” I said drily. “Didn’t think he cared about me.”
Cam winced, giving his brother a look that said ‘ shut up ’.
“I didn’t tell him shit,” Hunter said. “I’m not an idiot. He knew that too. He asked me to tell you he’d like to see you some time.”
Not a chance in hell.
“Thanks, Hunter,” I said.
Hunter nodded. “I’m headed out. Night.”
“Night,” Cam said.
I mumbled under my breath.
The front door opened and closed. Now it was just me and Cam. I could feel his eyes on me.
“Spit it out,” I muttered.
“You have to see him at some point,” Cam said. “This is a small town.”
“I’ve managed to not see him for over a decade. He’s the last thing on my mind right now.”
Cam was quiet. He knew when to push and when not to, and right now was not the time. I was already worried about Sarah. Thinking about my homophobic, piece of shit dad wasn’t exactly a high priority.
“I’m just saying, it might be healing to talk to him now that you’re an adult.”
“He kicked me out,” I snapped. “Your parents took me in. He lost me the day he said he never wanted to see me again.”
“Maybe he’s changed.”
Some people got to come out and still be loved. I had, for the most part, and was thankful for that. Cam’s mom hadn’t batted an eye when she’d found me crying on her porch. I’d never forget telling her everything, scared no one would love me, and her putting her arm around me with teary eyes, promising there was nothing wrong with me. I’d never forget Bob Harlow, Cam’s dad, threatening to fist fight my father when he found out what had happened.
“I’m sorry,” Cam said softly. “I can’t imagine his thought process. It still infuriates me. He steers clear of me if we’re in the same spot…”
I crossed my arms. “Spit it out. You got something else to say.”
I’d known him my whole life.
Cam pressed his lips together. “I just think people can change, Colt. ”
Maybe they could. But not John Hayes.
He could tell I wasn’t going to continue that conversation. I couldn’t. There was a lot of shit I’d done my best to heal from, but the wound was still open and barely patched together with stitches.
“Hunter doesn’t know what all went down,” Cam said. “So don’t be mad at him.”
I dried my hands with the hands only towel, which was labeled as so on the oven handle. “I’m not mad at Hunter.” I was mad at myself.
For several reasons.
“Well… Want to crash here tonight?”
It was tempting. They had a couple of extra bedrooms set aside for the occasion, since Cam had me as his best friend and Haley had Emma. It wasn’t uncommon for one of us to crash at their place.
“I think I’ll head home for the night,” I said.
Cam nodded. It was clear he wanted to say more, but he wouldn’t push.
He knew when to let me work through my feelings, and tonight was one of those times.
“I’ll see you this weekend at some point,” I said.
“Yep. And we have that meeting coming up soon with the contractor. I hope we can get shit rolling with the winery. I’m ready to get back to normal.”
“Me too,” I said. “It’ll be worth the wait, though. The relaunch will be good. The whole town is ready.”
Cam smiled. “Yeah they are. Alright, get some rest.”
“You too.”
I probably wouldn’t sleep a wink.