18. Sarah
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
sarah
What was I doing?
The question rattled through me as I parked between Sammy’s car and Colt’s truck. Colt had a stupid smirk on his face as he opened the door for me, the same dopey one that always made me fall in love with him for a second.
So much had happened today and I was doing my best to process my feelings. Being with the two of them together made me nervous as hell. “Can I help grab anything?” I asked.
Sammy and Colt shook their heads as they got a few totes from Sammy’s apartment out of the back of the truck. I couldn’t help but narrow my eyes on them, watching how they carefully avoided each other like two opposing magnets.
There was tension between the two of them, and it had nothing to do with the apartment break in.
I had half a mind to text Haley to ask her why she’d told me I could be gone for the whole night. I wasn’t sure I’d ever had a night away from the boys since they were born.
The three of us climbed the steps to the porch. Colt opened the door and we stepped inside, kicking off boots and tennis shoes. Colt eyed my worn shoes with a hum and I winced internally. They were looking rough.
What am I doing? I asked myself again.
Sammy carried the tote down the hall to a spare bedroom, followed by Colt. I stood there, wondering if I should stay or follow or god I didn’t know how to do this.
“I got things we can cook,” Colt called from the room. He emerged like a lanky golden god, his eyes softening on me.
All I could do was nod.
He surprised me by prowling down the hall straight toward me, only stopping once I craned my head back to look at him.
“I promise we won’t bite,” he whispered. “Unless you want us to, of course.”
“Okay, vampire,” Sammy teased as he came up behind him. “I’ll cook.”
“You can use whatever you want,” Colt said. “Just don’t judge me for anything with mold on it.”
Sammy and I both snorted.
“I will judge you,” I said.
Colt scrunched his face playfully. “Where’s the goods?”
“Here,” I said, holding up the bag I’d brought from home.
He snatched it from me and skipped playfully to the kitchen.
“Excuse me. Those were for me, if I recall correctly,” Sammy protested.
“Mmhm.” Colt dug into the bag and pulled out the loaf of pumpkin bread first. I leaned on the edge of the bar and watched the two of them playfully fight over it.
Sammy reached around him, but Colt kept moving the bread out of his grip. I felt like I was imposing on something private, yet I couldn’t pull my gaze away. I couldn’t stop the way every thought short circuited with the desire to be right there between them.
Sammy pinned Colt to the counter. “Give me the loaf.”
“No,” he quipped playfully. “It’s mine now.”
Sammy pressed his body to Colt’s, his gaze flickering up to mine.
Fuck. I swallowed hard, heat flooding me as I watched him press his mouth to Colt’s ear, saying something low that I couldn’t hear but had him blushing hard.
“Bastard,” he mumbled, giving up the loaf.
Sammy lingered for a moment, his gaze still on me. “You look pretty when you blush. Do you like watching us?”
My mouth fell open.
Sammy unwrapped the foil around the bread and opened up a drawer, pulling out a knife. He reached around Colt again and cut it into slices.
“Enjoy,” Sammy said.
Colt’s face was red. “You know, for someone who’s typically a quiet mystery, you sure are dominant.”
“Yeah,” he said, stealing a slice of the bread. He bit into it and groaned. “I am. Now, get out of the kitchen while I cook.”
“Yes, sir,” Colt said. He grabbed two slices, a napkin, and winked at me as he headed for the couch. “Come sit with me.”
“Are you sure you don’t need help?” I asked.
Sammy nodded. “Absolutely. Go relax.”
I hesitated. I wasn’t used to being cooked for. My hands felt itchy, like they needed to stay busy and be useful. With a deep inhale, I joined Colt on the couch instead.
“Have you thought about baking things to sell?” he asked with a mouthful.
“Sort of,” I laughed, shaking my head at him. “My god, you’re a mess sometimes.”
He winked. My heart skipped a beat.
“You should do it,” Sammy called.
“I’d have to think about when,” I said. “I’m not confident I have time to bake everything I’d like to. Or if people would even be interested.”
“When we get the winery back up, you could have a food truck,” he said. “It’s something Cam and I are working into the plans. We were always missing more food options for folks, so we want a space for food trucks. We can support local businesses that way. What about Bently…hmmm…”
“Bently Bakery?” A tingle spread through me and I smiled. It felt right. “There’s no way I could start a business right now.”
“I bet we could help,” Colt said, wiggling his brows. “I’ll be the taste tester.”
“Ah, I see.” I laughed.
It would be a dream, though part of me was scared to say it aloud. The idea of having my own little shop excited me—but I wasn’t sure I could make it happen. It was one of those things that I let myself imagine before falling asleep at night, or when I wanted to think about anything except real life.
“So,” I said, clearing my throat. “Want to tell me what’s going on with the two of you?”
Sammy looked up at Colt. He pressed his lips together. “I think we should wait to talk until we’re eating.”
I raised a brow, but didn’t argue. Mostly because now I was very intrigued. I wondered if the two of them had decided they didn’t want to be with me, or if?—
No, that was absurd.
Colt placed his hand on my knee and gave me a gentle squeeze. I liked the feel of his hand and wanted more. I wanted a lot more.
“Too much?” he murmured.
“No,” I whispered.
“Do you want to know what I did when I came home after this morning?”
“Yes. ”
“I thought about finally kissing you. Finally touching you…”
I squeezed my thighs and whispered, “What else?”
He raised a brow and leaned in to whisper in my ear. “Then I imagined you riding my cock. I stroked myself and would have come, but then Sammy knocked on my door.”
Oh.
“Then what?” I asked.
He was quiet. I kept my voice low as I studied him. “Did you kiss him?”
“Yeah. Does that bother you?”
Even after all these years, he was still so shitty about having a poker face. He tried, but I could hear the vulnerability in his question. But the truth was, it did not bother me.
“No,” I said. “It doesn't bother me at all. In fact…”
“Tell me,” he whispered.
He was patient. Which was good, because I'd never said anything before about what I was thinking. That I wanted the two of them to be together, that I wanted them to be with me.
For the last few days, I saw them in my imagination every time I thought about reaching for my vibrator.
I'd known them for years. Even though Colton and I hadn't been close, he'd still been a constant in my life. I'd never forget him sleeping on the couch for days to make sure we felt safe after what happened to Haley. Even with Thomas dead and David in jail at the time, I’d barely been able to sleep.
I felt safe with them.
“I haven’t been with someone in a long time,” I said softly. “David didn’t touch me very often after the boys because he thought my body was ruined.”
“ What? ” Colt snarled.
Sammy dropped something in the kitchen, startling us. We both looked up. His brows were pulled together, his muscles rigid, mouth twisted into a fuming frown.
“He said that to you, Sarah?” Sammy asked.
“Yeah,” I said, shrinking into the couch. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to bring that up, I was just going to say it’s been a long time for me. This is all new again.”
“He was wrong,” Colt said gently, giving Sammy a look.
Sammy blew out a breath and shook his head, leaving the kitchen. He leaned over the back of the couch, and planted a gentle kiss on the top of my head. “He was very wrong.”
I closed my eyes, the ghost of his kiss lingering. Between these two, I was a goner.
How long had it been since someone desired me?
Could I even say anyone ever had? I didn’t know if David had ever cared for me. I was used as a way for his brother to get to Haley.
“We’ll take everything slow,” Colt said.
I pressed my lips together. I wasn’t sure I wanted to take it slow. I had needs and wants and I’d been putting it all on the back burner for so long.
“I have a night away from responsibilities,” I said. “That hasn’t happened in a long time. I don’t want to go slow.”
His nostrils flared and he hummed. His hand was still on my knee, his thumb tracing circles slowly over the thin denim. A shiver ran through me, causing my breath to catch.
“Dinner is ready.”
I started to get up, but Colt shook his head. “I’ve got it, sugar.”
I sighed in defeat and stayed put. I watched the two of them in the kitchen, feeling a bubbly sense of nerves and excitement. Colt brought our plates back and Sammy followed. He’d cooked up a stir fry with chicken and veggies and it smelled delicious.
“Not chili and cornbread, but it’ll do.”
“It smells great,” Colt said.
“It does,” I agreed. “Thanks for cooking.”
“I’m sad to say that I don’t have a dining table,” Colt said as he handed me a plate. “I usually eat standing in the kitchen or on the couch.”
Sammy wrinkled his nose. “I’d judge, but I do the same.”
“We can sit on the floor, picnic-style?” I suggested.
I slid off the cushion and leaned my back against the sofa. Sammy sat on one side of me and Colt sat on the other, the three of us creating a circle.
“I’m interested in both of you,” Sammy said bluntly.
Colt nearly choked. “Fuck, I guess we’re getting right to it.”
“Do you mean like the three of us dating each other?” I asked.
I’d read romance books like that. I used to sneak romance books at the grocery store and hide them in my glove compartment from David. Looking back, I was embarrassed I’d stayed with him as long as I did. But it was hard to see the end of the tunnel when you were in it.
“Yes,” Sammy said. “I like Colt. I liked him before things started changing between us, but never acted on it because he’s Cam’s best friend.”
“Well, that makes sense,” I said.
Colt crossed his legs and balanced his plate on his thigh. “I have always wanted Sarah, as we all know. I think the whole town knows.”
I offered him a soft smile.
“But I’m also interested in Sammy. Cam caught us kissing earlier before we went to his apartment.”
“Oh god,” I laughed. “No wonder he was being so weird earlier. Haley picked up on it too.”
“I gathered.” Colt shook his head. “Thankfully Emma wasn’t there because she would have figured it out.”
“Oh for sure. Emma knows all.” I wiggled a brow. “What were you going to do after the kiss, if Cam hadn’t interrupted?”
Sammy smirked. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
I laughed and nudged him. “In great detail.”
“What if we talk about what we want to do with you?” Sammy countered.
Now it was my turn to feel flustered again. “Like what?”
“Is there anything in particular you like?” Colt asked.
I raised my brow. “Like…?”
“Spanking, flogging, things along those lines…”
Oh.
Oh.
“I’ve never done anything like that before…” I whispered.
“We don’t have to go that far,” Colt said quickly.
“No, I’m interested,” I said. “I’m just new to this. It’s exciting.”
“Have you had any fantasies?” Sammy asked. “About trying anything? I’m dominant in the bedroom and like rope, blind folds, choking…”
Colt’s eyes widened. “Really?”
Sammy winked at him and then focused his gaze on me. I was going to combust. How was this really my life? Two hot men who I’d known forever wanted to be with me in ways I’d never experienced.
“Alright, well since we’re putting it all out there, I’m a kinky motherfucker,” Colt said. “And I’m a slut. A huge slut.”
My mouth fell open, for what I was sure wouldn’t be the last time tonight.
“And I’m a switch, so that works out,” he said, winking at Sammy. “Who would have known Sammy Harlow, the most mysterious and broody guy in Citrus Cove, was a Dom? Although, it makes sense. Unless you mean you’re just bossy and don’t know what being a Dom really entails. ”
Sammy’s gaze darkened and he lifted a brow. “Taunting me, huh? No, I’ll put you on your fucking knees and make you beg for my cock while our girl watches.”
I squeaked. “Oh my god .”
Colt smirked. “Eat your fucking dinner, Sammy Harlow. We’ll see about everything else after.”